How Many Kids Do You Hope to Have?

I had my 1st baby at 26 & i had the worse docs… long story short my son was born with cerbel palsy due to Docs mistakes that was 10 years ago. Now at 36 i think 1 more baby but when my son died it was the worst feeling to be somebodies mommy one day and the next day to be no bodies mommy so with that thought i think maybe i will have 4 or five but at 36 IDK if thats possible or if that is best. So i am still having the great debate with myself!

hahaha – both of my kids are one-shot-wonders… really! Be careful, all it takes is a couple of glasses of red wine!

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I’m sure this sounds crazy to most but I’d love to have 5 kids! I’m one of seven and I love my huge, wonderful family. But I currently have 3 littles in a small 1 bedroom on the UWS and I’m SO worn out. I am hoping we can move out into the country in the next year and have more kids and outside spaces for them to independently explore.

I have a friend here on the UWS who is pregnant with her 7th! The oldest is almost 9 years old, and there is a set of twins. They live comfortably in a 2 bedroom, and don’t use hired help. She, in my book, is a saint. She is seriously the most sweet and patient person and he inspires me.

We are very happy with our two ages 5.5 and 27 months. One girl, one boy. Not outnumbered! And feel like we’ll be able to fully give to each.

We have five. It is crazy wonderful. None of them were “planned”, although I did say at one point (when I had only had one) that I thought 4 would be nice. He is getting a vasectomy in October. So 5 is definitely the magic number. Oh, I should mention, I am the oldest of 12.

I want people to start asking themselves how many more children the earth can handle.

I have the two I had hoped to have, and while there are days that I wonder what a huge family would feel like..I think the two are perfect — girl & boy — sister & brother, and they are adorable together!

I used to want 4 kids, but after having two, I’m literally just taking it one day at a time lol!

– Sarah
agirlintransit.blogspot.com

Three. Fingers crossed; knock on wood. :) And I would love to see my little guy as a big brother, too.

Two for us and that’s what we were blessed to have this past March, our second. We tried and tried for 3 years after our first. Now, in hindsight and knowing what I’m like I feel blessed they are 4yrs 4months apart. The help of the first is amazing. Had I had them any closer I think I’d be going nuts…well, I am almost daily but the fun kind not the crazy kind.

Sending you lots of positive thoughts for the making of your second. We didn’t try with our first either and when you’re planning and trying it changes things for sure. Different mind set. I’m actually enjoying this second child in ways I couldnt with the first. It’s been lovely!

we are still trying for our first one
quite late for both of us
ideally would be two but if we can have just one its a blessing

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I think our number is 3… #1 is currently on the way, so we’ll see how it goes!

At first, I wanted 4 (I grew up with 3 older brothers, so it seemed like the perfect number/perfect chance to have 2 boys and 2 girls so each had a sibling of their own gender. I always wanted a sister! Thankfully I’ve gotten them through marriage :)). Anyway, my husband is from a family of 2, so that was always his number. (His cousins are all in pairs as well, with each family having 1 boy and 1 girl).

I know it means I’ll need to get a minivan one day, but 3-4 is probably going to be our ideal :)

I have a daughter from my previous relationship.. and for some reason I see two with my current partner. So maybe 3 in total is MY magic number? We’ll see! :)

I always wanted four, two boys and two girls. The boys the oldest the girls the youngest, it’s kind of a pattern in my family. However I am 34 and not married yet so that is highly unlikely. To be honest, at this point, I would feel tremendously blessed to have one.

Have some time with them as much as you can.

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We have two and for us, it’s the perfect number. We have two girls and we always knew that whatever the sex of our kids, two was it for us. People always ask us if we’re going to try for a boy and are always astounded when I say no. Hubby had a vasectomy. We are done. Though having a boy would have been lovely, our girls are amazing and we have the time and money to manage them well. For us, it works. No regrets. Our friends have 3 and 4 kids and they seem so harried all the time. Yes, for us, two is good, but it is a deeply personal choice.

Just one comment on the overpopulation idea. It’s true some people have kids, and others don’t. But no, it does not “all even out.” If that were true, why would I be 35 years old and living in a world with a population that is literally almost twice what it was when I was younger? 7 billion people now!!!!

Regardless of what you think about people’s choices and the ability of the earth to provide for an unlimited number of humans… the population IS rising, dramatically so. From 1960 to 2011, the population more than doubled, for about 3 billion to 7 billion, at a rather steady rate, with no end in sight.

Currently I am just playing the role of child, 21 year old child that is.

I have a brother who is 25, and we have been able to be good friends our whole lives.

I have spoken to others who have a an age gap of around 3 or 4 years between siblings, and they all feel the same way.

I don’t know how much it has to do with things, but its a thought.

Cheers!

One. Part of me would like two (although with overpopulation a problem, I would feel uncomfortable having more than two, since that’s obviously the replacement rate), but in my family, there tends to be a very, very easy first daughter and then a crazy hellion second daughter. So, I cannot raise my sister or my aunt. I figured we’d stop while we were ahead with the angelic first child. I think she’d make a great sister–but then, I was so excited to be a big sister, and my sister was not excited to be a little sister!

I know some people are against onlies, but honestly, I think it’s societal conditioning. I also think the resentful onlies don’t know what kind of sibling they might have ended up with! Maybe it would have been great, but honestly, I only know about four people who dearly love their siblings. Everyone else just tolerates (or dislikes) theirs.

We planned two, and I got talked into the third, and I think that is it for us! If we had a fourth it wouldn’t be the end of the world but at my ripe old age of 38 I worry about chromosome problems, thanks to my job.

I have always wanted four or five. We have one daughter; age 20 months and we have been trying since March although work schedules meant we haven’t been able to make each month count. I am in the TWW right now and it is killing me. I hate this! We tried for only two months the last time. I’m 35 this year, so I’m getting antsy.

Wow, after reading the comments I feel even more blessed to be holding my 3 1/2 month son as I type. He is our first and we are over the moon to have him. After a surprise pregnancy, a very easy 9 months, a fairly easy delivery, and a healthy and amazing baby I feel almost greedy to want more. I know just how lucky we are and it only takes reading the comments here to confirm that. I would love to give our son a sibling, I come from a family of 3, but I also would be okay if it’s just the 3 of us. I do struggle with spacing and think if we did try for another I would wait close to 3 years- I just want soak in every moment with my son for awhile!

I have a nearly 4 year old and I’m expecting baby 2. I feel really quite smug about the 4 year gap. My sister in law has a 4yo,2yo and a baby and it’s very hectic to say the least!! I’d love to have 3 or 4 but we’re just going to see how we feel after this baby is born.

I had 2 miscarriages whilst trying for this baby and in the end I felt like it would never happen for us. It’s not that our boy isn’t enough for us, he is amazing, it’s those darn hormones which make you broody!! I have a lot of romantic notions about having a large family. But I also don’t want to spend my whole life having kids and I know another 4 year gap would be too much if we are going to have a 3rd…

When I was younger I wanted three.
I’m 35 now, and have a 2,5 year old and am pregnant with nr2 and Im thinking if we had started having kids earlier… in our 20’s… we might have had 3.

We never even had to try with nr1 or nr2, they happened pretty much the minute I stopped on contraceptives (nr1) and stopped breastfeeding (nr2).

But, I find being pregnant and breastfeeding is very hard work… and even though it is the best thing ever, it is taking it’s toll… both physically and economically… so we feel with a boy and a girl we are done after this one :)

Excited for you both that you have that “Ready for a second” baby feeling. I’ll be marrying a man who has 4 kiddos! The wife passed away.. and he’s had his hands full. It’s been amazing to see how much he loves, how much he takes care of all 4 kids while working full time, etc. I’m in awe of him in how he provides for them on so many levels and am so excited to join the family. I know we both desire to experience having a baby together.. which will put us at 5 kids. We’ll be one big happy beautiful messy family ;) I can’t imagine a better life!

We are also planning to start actually ‘trying’ this Fall. We’ve always talked about two kids as well but some days I think about three but my husband quickly vetoes that idea!

Our first was also a surprise so it will be exciting trying for the next… kind of giddy about it actually!

I wish to have an even number of children haha,
Like two or four?
Well, three will be good too…
(Too early to think about it lol)

Wow that certainly stirred up a reaction… lovely to read everyone’s ideas, but at the end its what you are lucky to get..

I reared five wonderful people, and never thought of a.. the responsiblity of being in charge of little ones.. b.. the time it would take,c.. the cost.. somehow, it all worked out so well.. we were lucky, but we didnt have the money to splash around, no holidays as such… however they are all grown up, happy to see each other,.and I am very blessed… money didnt come into it really… we just managed and hoped for the best and flew by the seats of our pants… no one has truly worked it out,but its all such a great ride.!!!. I hope you have the children you wish for and that you all live happy and fulfilled lives.. j

I’m pregnant with our first ( 17 weeks along now )… It’s been a harsh pregnancy so far, which makes me hesitant of ever getting pregnant again. But I do love babies and the little people they become… So I hope to have two kids, maybe three… ( my guy wants three! )…. But it’s a miracle to even get pregnant, so I hope we are lucky enough to get pregnant again once ( or twice ) more… We’ll see in about, eh… four years!

We want three but i don’t know if we’ll be lucky enough to have so. It takes a lot of time and money to raise three children :/
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We have two – and this is it. We’ve been blessed with boy and girl, three years difference. This is important too when you plan on having a child : I could take care of our baby girl whereas our elder son would discover school – timing was great. I also like building “unique” relationship with him and her, individually. I hear from mothers of four that they cannot build this individual relationship with each of their children (well, they get a strong team spirit instead) and I would miss that with more kids around. And yes, seeing your first one becoming a BigBro really is a thing ! Joanna, did you write anything about asking for gender while you are expecting or not (yet) ?

I’ve thought since I was pretty young that I’d like 5 boys. We have 3 now.

So now I’m just trying to decide how to space the last two ;0)

I would love to have 3 but I think two is more likely. I would just love to even have one, we have been having infertility issues and are working towards TTC. Hopefully one day soon. :)