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An emotional rollercoaster. By the wonderful Grace Farris.
P.S. Summer style and my everyday thought process.
Things That Have Prevented Me from Wearing White Pants
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Funny, I read through the comments and couldn’t imagine feeling comfortable wearing white pants – but thinking about it, I have several white dresses that I wear regularly and without worry 😅
not to mention dirty benches, dirty chairs, or the impromptu need to sit on the floor, grass, ground, any surface that will leave a mark that is hard to wash off.
The Argentina tshirt (probably Messi’s?)!! My heart! <3 <3 <3
I’m late to this discussion but I can proudly say that at 52 i now finally dare to wear white pants and skirts! (Cue the happy jig). Menopause is great! I never dared wear it before. I was terrified by memories from my early teens. When I was a teen I overheard some mean girls telling a story that I will never forget. They watched and snickered as a girl sitting in the church pew ahead of them developed a blood stain on the back of her skirt that grew bigger and bigger during the service. They didn’t say who the poor girl was (and I hope they didn’t know her), but they referred to that day as (can you guess it?) Sunday, Bloody Sunday. At the time I didn’t think there was anything more mortifying than that. I never dared wear white after that.
I once wore white jeans to work in NYC and got a surprise period that leaked all the way through, leaving me with the dreaded red blotch. I had a long commute including two walks and a train ride and decided to own it. NYC has seen much worse and I told myself, I dare someone to say something to me. There was something empowering about not cowering away and trying to buy a quick pair of sweats at TJ Maxx. It’s part of life- what can you do!?
Catching up on yesterday’s posts while wearing my first white pants of the year and laughing bc I just got back from the store with my 18-month-old and am already covered in unidentifiable smears and smudges
I wear white pants in defiance … I’ve conceded enough to motherhood. I’m not sacrificing white too. Plus there’s nothing like walking around in spectacular white with 3 little boys. It makes me feel all powerful.
I yesterday I received pale pink pants I’d ordered online. unwrapping them it dawned on me that from afar it might look like I forgot my pants altogether.
I once wore a pale pink sundress and was standing on my balcony waiting for a friend who arrived and said, “I thought you were nude!” Never again.
The one time I wore white pants, I was a senior in high school and it was a big deal for me. Reader, I summoned all my confidence wearing those pants and I didn’t have a lot of confidence to spare.
That day, unbeknownst to me, just so happened to be our drunk driving simulation day…? Yes. That was a thing.
This kid, we’ll call him Dan, was about to step into the golf cart, put on goggles that made you “feel drunk” and drive around in circles. We all know there are no goggles in the world that can make you feel drunk but Dan didn’t drink. We knew this because we threw the parties. He didn’t have his license because he was scared of driving (his words). He was a kind, shy kid who had never been behind the wheel of anything. Queue the foreshadowing.
My good friend, Andrew and I, stepped back because we knew this wouldn’t be good. But Deputy Dave (real name and a real deputy somehow) told us to stand at the line. Like at the line the golf cart drives on.
Reader, I got hit by a golf cart. A bunch of us did. We ran. We swerved. But that golf cart ran faster and swerved harder.
Thankfully, we were all (mostly) okay in the end. Poor Dan felt terrible but it wasn’t his fault (it was Deputy Dave’s) and the real tragedy here… my white pants with the pretty bow, covered in dirt, grass, and blood (my lip was busted pretty badly).
And that was the first and last time I wore white pants.
LOL. Wow, I hope that’s the last time Deputy Dave ran that ‘simulation’! It seems like almost everyone has a story from high school involving adults in charge directing teens to do something that seems completely insane in retrospect but this is next level.
This is bananas! As a high schooler in the ‘90’s, I can attest that there were some bizarre anti-drunk-driving …um, activities? But this is insane!
I love this and all the comments. I’m 37 and still have leaks on my period…thought I’d figure it out by now but life’s funny like that.
Right? 42 and I finally got period underwear from Thinx. I can still manage to leak if I don’t change them often enough but they’ve brought down my “aw dammit” count each menstrual cycle I use them.
I’m the problem. I compulsively wipe my hands on my pants constantly. Blue jeans for me.
I stopped wearing white pants when I was in my early 30’s for all of the reasons expressed in the cartoon. I am now in my 50’s and still do not wear white pants.
This is hilarious! Perfectly timed for our weather. Thank you for featuring Grace’s amazing work.
I spilled coffee all over some beloved wide leg white jeans and a miracle mix of 1/3 blue dawn and 2/3 hydrogen peroxide got it all out!
Funny so true! For sure anything with tomato sauce acts like my clothes are magnitized if they are all white.
Ok I was reading on a small screen – I initially thought the yellow splat on the capricious menstrual cycle calendar said “SWEARING!” and I was like, wow, RELATABLE!!
I’m firmly in the “I will wear white pants, stains and all, without fear or hesitation”. My favorite white jumpsuit has become more shades of greige, ecru and spotted creams. There’s something that seems otherworldly about confidently wearing white. And yes, I’ve spilled coffee all over a crisp white shirt, but tide pens and some bright red on the lips seems to distract!
HAHAHAHA I’ve always wondered! Why do people think white pants are worth the trouble?
I used to wear white shirts pre-children, but always struggled with them yellowing or gettin pit stains. Now with a toddler, they and all my silk shirts hand in the closet unworn. I do like white shorts in the summer.
Hi, switch to deodorant! No antiperspirant. That takes care of the yellow pit stains :)
Muddy dogs, muddy dogs, a million times, muddy dogs
I’ve even given up on white/nude underwear! No way any white thing actually visible would make the cut.
Come to think of it, the one white clothing item I can recall was a white jean skirt during my first pregnancy. No wacky period and no messy kids, yet.
I too found a great white maternity skirt with an elastic (from the Gap, I think). I still sometimes wear it, long post pregnancy, as the elastic band is way more forgivable to gaining or losing a few pounds. Need more recommendations for nice summer skirts without zippers!
I love the idea of white pants or a flowy white summer dress; it’s a fantasy. I don’t own any white clothing, it’s not a flattering color for me . As I don’t wear much makeup day to day ( and the older I get) I wear colors that enhance my coloring. I love it on other people though!
No one has experienced white pants until their kid plays baseball. Why white baseball pants? Why?
White soccer kits are in the same ridiculous category!
Yes- just bought my kid some t-ball pants tonight. When I saw they had grey there was no way I was buying white.
I know!! Talk about a red rag to a (white) bull for the kids! My son will get through a whole game without a mark and then slide on his knees to celebrate at the end. Dramatic (pointless) slow motion “Don’t even think about it” from me on the sideline
my 3 dark-furred cats, my dirty car, my own sneezes, my reasons go on and ON and on lmao
I have the hardest time finding underwear you can’t see through white pants.
oh pfft, spills shpills !!
I say wear those white pants if they give you that summary-light feeling ..at the worst you will get some stains but there is nothing a little tide/pretreating before wash can’t fix !
P.S. I just scored a very affordable and cute pair from Old Navy , can’t wait to pair with light cotton tops and flat sandals :)
Me too! I wear white jeans all summer long and they do get a little stained, but it can be fixed.
As someone whose periods and spotting have been all over the place lately, I feel this
Me too, me too
Agreed – started mine exactly one week early this week, ugh.
There is only one thing that prevents me from wearing white pants and that is my better judgement.
Best comment
Hahah!
The really cute French bulldog that comes to say hello to my dog and me on our walks. It was the first time I’d worn them in a while. Cute little paw print through lol
My friend re wearing white pants in the middle of dark winter: just do it, they get as many stains as in the summer!
but i never wear white pants no matter the season.
Nice post! :)
I remember the one time I tried to wear white pants to work I promptly spilled an entire cup of coffee on them in the car and had to go back home to change.
We are in the process of purchasing a new car to replace our SUV that just went over 200,000 miles and we bought the summer before our daughter entered kindergarten and is now a junior in college. So many stains.
As we were looking at the options, my husband was oohing and aahing over the light gray leather interior. I looked at him, patted his hand and said: “you know me, I am not a light gray leather interior person. I need to hide the stains.’
Poor guy.
what was the SUV that lasted you so well? would you recommend? we’re thinking of buying a 4runner.
I’m also curious about the SUV, and hope you will share the recommendation.
Lizzy, if it interests you, the 2025 4Runner will come in a hybrid!
Every time I wear something light colored and brand new, one of my kids gets hurt and bleeds on it. I actually don’t know if I own anything that doesn’t have a stain of some sort 🤦♀️
It sounds disgusting, but saliva is really good for shifting bloodstains. Apparently there are enzymes in it that break down proteins or something.
So if you have a (smallish) bloodstain, treat it while it’s fresh: spit on it (as much as possible), leave for a few minutes to work, then scrub with COLD water and a bit of soap. This should get rid of enough of it that the washing machine will obliterate the rest for you.
Yours, a woman who had a REALLY unreliable period in her teens.
One of my favorite coworkers just bought herself a beautiful pair of white pants and then reported thinking “I shouldn’t buy pants I am afraid to wear in my own car.” LOLOL!
YES! I owned exactly one pair of white pants and my biggest issue was sitting. Sitting anywhere! Forget sitting on the grass at the park… or even the park bench… but even after sitting in my car or desk chair, I’d be so concerned that something was stuck to my rear end!
I am wearing white pants today!! I got them secondhand, so they came pre-stained. :)
Hahaha
I got a secondhand pre-stained pair of white pants too and decided immediately to dye them pink. No regrets on that decision. :)
All hail the mighty Mirena coil. It enabled me to wear something other than black or navy on my lower half for the first time in 2020. About thirty (!!!) years of avoiding pale trousers because I was worried about leaking blood. Now I have multiple pairs of white/ecru trousers and oh my gosh I love them.
Things That Have Prevented Me from Wearing White Pants. Great memoir or essay collection title.
I would say „everything“ if you want to live a spontaneous life! Sitting down in a park, eating anything that could drip, hugging kids with sticky faces and fingers… Would miss out on a lot :)
In an Idle Convo About Prospective Perimenopause (they’re everywhere, like pigeons!) the other day I absentmindedly referred to my menstrual status as having a hot mic, and now I can’t get that image out of my head.
Bought myself a classy new pair of very light straight leg khakis and wore them for the first time on spring break. They lasted about two hours. I took my seven year old to get her first manicure. I guess her little red thumb was not quite dry afterward and brushed against my pants! Miraculously, the red streaks came out with a good oxy clean soak, but I’m afraid to wear them again for all the reasons mentioned here!
Spillers Unite!
For real, I don’t wear white because there isn’t a single thing I possess that I haven’t spilled coffee on. Including my child and pets.
LOL! The universe gifts me with spills anytime I wear something nice or light-colored (well, and other times too, but it’s less devastating on dark denim). Sometimes, new stains show up that are inexplicable: blue ink when I’ve used a black pen all day, for example. :)
Ecru is the answer!
I feel like it’s too early to wear white pants, but I am looking forward to it! I have a pair of super comfortable white jeans I love to wear on the hottest days. Once I discovered the laundry evangelist’s (Patric Richardson), sodium percarbonate protocol, I no longer worry. His site is helpful.
Lovely to find another Patric fan. Sodium percarbonate has changed my life!
impromptu park visits with the kids – involving grass, rocks, etc
I’m really surprised that nothing outdoors was on the list!
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