In Which I Ran Into My Ex-Boyfriend

Haha ! This was definitely fun to read. But If I ever saw my EX and he didn’t see me I’d take a U-TURN and vanish, unless he’s with someone (girl) I’d go and say hi to make things awkward LoL .

I’ve seen him a few times over the years. We’ve spoken briefly once or twice. If other people are around, he’s cordial. If not, he gives me a silent look of hatred, which I find odd as he broke up with me in a truly humiliating way.
Whenever I do see him, I feel so grateful. Everything I love about my life now would not have happened if that relationship had continued – my world would be smaller, my career less intrepid, my mind less curious, my hunger less sated, my heart less full.

I got stuck with my ex on a turbulent 6 hour plane ride – my first love, first many things ex. And boy did I do what I could to hide! No words were exchanged but we made eye contact. I keep seeing it play out as a terrible romantic comedy with the plane going down hah….Thank goodness my flying moto is to dress comfy-but-well, because I sure looked good :).

My ex-husband and his new wife watch mine and my husband’s house for us when we are out of town. We are in the same circle of friends, and just spent the last week camping all as one big group, with everyone’s kids there too. It’s not weird at all to me. When I see him now, I just think of him as a friend, and it’s almost like I can’t remember my life before when he was more than that.

I ran into my high-school boyfriend, his colleagues, and his soon to be fiancee at a coffee shop after having breakfast with my parents, sister, and husband before a close friend’s funeral back in my hometown in California.

It was honestly shocking; I thought I might faint. We’d stayed friendly since breaking up a decade before, but I only ever saw him on purpose, and our visits had gotten rarer as we both got more serious with other people. I went over to say hi and was playing it pretty cool until he asked why I was in town. I managed to get the word “funeral” out before I burst into tears and cried on him in the middle of a busy patio. I thought he would follow up with me after (just a text asking if I was ok, and maybe finding out who had died?) but we haven’t spoken since.

It’s been over a year. I am still grieving the loss of my friend and, thanks to this chance encounter, her death will always entwined with the seeming end of this decades-long, many-formatted relationship. It will mark the day I finally grew up.

I live in fear of this. My most significant ex-boyfriend, we were on again, off again from age 18-25, the last on-again lasting 3 years, so he was basically my entire young love life until we broke up and he ended up engaged and with a baby on the way 6 months after our breakup, which devastated me at the time (moving on so fast can really hurt!) I’m happily married to the guy I met at age 28 and we have a beautiful baby, but I’d probably still be a mess if I ran into that guy. Worse is that we grew up in the same town, our parents live a few blocks away from each other, so it’s bound to happen at some point. I’m shocked it hasn’t happened already. Instead we keep running into people in each other’s lives: my brother-in-law ran into his sister, our moms ran into each other, he ran into my cousin, etc. so I hear about him secondhand. It’s only a matter of time especially now that I have a kid to take to the local park when we’re home at our parents’!

Well besides actually physically running into my ex, he responded to a craigslist ad when I was looking for a roommate (it was a different place than when we were together). What’s even crazier is that HE DID IT AGAIN when a different roommate was looking for a subletter! He was literally about to come over when she told me his name (very unusual first name) and I stopped dead in my tracks. I did live in a pretty small town at the time, but it still baffled me that it happened twice!

If I saw an ex on the street I would 300% keep walking, ESPECIALLY if they were with their significant other ? If my husband and I were to get a divorce I would try and stay friends with him because we have a child together but in all other instances, I see no point to keeping an ex in my life. I think this probably speaks more to the quality of my exes and not so much some grand opinion that exes serve no purpose after a breakup.

Last time I bumped into an ex was a few years ago getting off the same commuter train. We’d been broken up for a few years at this point – it had been a shortish but intense relationship when I was a student. He was a few years older, and he had turned weird, controlling and possessive towards the end. Anyway, we made polite small talk as we exited the station, during which time he told me he’d got married and had two kids (with the woman he’d dated straight after me) – there was a definite ‘look what you missed out on’ vibe. Just as I was making my excuses and heading home he asked if I wanted to see some pictures of his family. I took myself by complete surprise by saying ‘Not really. See you’. It was so liberating. Next time we got off the same train we pretended we hadn’t seen each other.

If I see any of my exes I’d probably greet them… because I am looking fab these days! Gotta show it off while I got it. Greeting them also makes it seem like I’m unaffected by seeing them. The possibility of them seeing me and knowing that I saw them and avoided them, well, I shouldn’t like that. Even if I feel just like Joanna did, I’d like to seem like a cool cat.

I ran into my ex, we were together for more than 2 years. he called me by the wrong name!!! I could not believe it, I was so hurt and so angry and certain that my “squad” would be as angered as I was and we would immediately begin plotting our collective revenge. I marched into our Saturday morning coffee collective with my justified anger to tell my story and the girls laughed, so hard, coffee spitting, howling uproarious laughter. I had no choice but to laugh too and be grateful that he is an ex!

About 5 years ago, just a few months shy of my 30th birthday, I returned back to the UK from living abroad in Japan for a number of years. I had moved back to my parents house in the place I had grew up in while I contemplated my next move. I had been back literally 3 days and was at the supermarket with my Dad when out of nowhere the boy I had lost my virginity to at 17 suddenly appeared next to me. It wasn’t some big love affair at the time, we dated casually for on a few months and I hadn’t seen him since that summer, but there he was stood next to me. It was such a disorientating situation, I was so jetlagged, still in Japanese mannerism mode ( I think I bowed at him during goodbyes) and just totally unprepared to see him. I can’t begin to remember what I said but I know I did not enjoy it haha.
The ‘ex-encounter’ is such a big mash up of emotions and memories that hit you square in the face, I really don’t think you can ever be prepared for that!

After breaking up with my serious live in boyfriend of 4 years almost 10 years ago now, I have only ever run into him one time. It was a few months before my wedding to my now husband, in the always packed Union Square Trader Joe’s. I was trying to pour myself a tiny cup of coffee when he said my name and I remember feeling like my
whole body froze. I promptly spilt my tiny coffee and we stood SO awkwardly in front of the tasting table (likely pissing off many a TJ’s shopper that day) saying our hello’s. It was so painfully uncomfortable standing there with this person who once was MY person and now felt like a complete stranger. We said goodbye, I left my cart mid store, and called my mom on the corner of 14th street to tell her what happened. I was so shaky for hours after! I followed up the encounter with an email, in which I could gracefully articulate all the nice things I wanted to say. He responded with a beautiful email back, and it actually ended up bringing some closure that I didn’t even realize I needed before I got married. I’ve been happily married 6 years this weekend and have never seen him again!

My Husband and I go to the same Junior High School, He’s my senior, so I know most of his friends and so as He. One day we met my ex-bf at a wedding party and he’s the kind of bf that friendly enough when we met (that’s not the first time). I was trying so hard to look normal when I feel really nervous knowing my husband and my ex meeting for the first time. But then, He totally ignored me and make the whole conversation with my husband, ONLY my husband like I didn’t exist. So that went well, but it’s weird enough to start questioning my own existence. Oh wait, it’s not my me! He’s the one who’s rude and lucky me I didn’t end up marrying him. LOL

I ran into my ex in the grocery store. He saw me hiding awkwardly by the elevator, having tried to run away from him, and I saw him ditch his cart by the door and head to the parking garage, having tried to run away from me. Somehow, the fact that we both had the exact same reaction made it feel less terrible.

I had the worst high school breakup and I was DEVASTATED for years and my journal proved this in very long and dramatic entries. We always talk about this journal so for my bachelorette party my twin sister had my mom overnight it to the house where we were staying at. During some wine sipping (gulping) at a Sonoma vineyard, we all took turns reading my journal entries, crying laughing. I haven’t seen this ex in oh, 13 years? But he became famous with my friends after this.

Literally 2 weeks later my twin sister ran into him at the airport – and all of my friends (and myself) treated it like a celeb sighting, we wished she had gotten a selfie LOL.

PS – high school journal entry readings should be mandatory readings at bachelorette parties, it’s so hilarious. Haha.

I dated a guy for almost 8 years and 2 weeks before my 30th birthday, he packed up his things one morning and moved out, unannounced. Fast forward a year, and I am at an outdoor Ray Lamontagne concert on a Friday night. Its a decent sized venue, but I had this weird feeling that he would possibly be there, because it was an artist we had both loved while dating.

I get seated with my friend and upon doing a quick scan of the audience, I breathe a sigh of relief after he’s nowhere in sight. A few songs in, just as Ray Lamontagne starts belting out his song, “you are the best thing,” I notice some people filing in late a few rows in front of me. I immediately spot a couple and since it’s getting dark, I can’t fully see their faces, but begin questioning whether it is him and his new girlfriend. Then the guy puts his hand on the small of her back to guide her to their seats, and just seeing that, I knew it was him. It all came rushing back to me, how he had always placed his hand on the small of my back in the same way to prevent losing each other in crowds. The kicker was that they walked in during the song that we had always planned to have as our first dance at our wedding. OUCH.

The universe was kinder to me a year later when I found myself in a happy relationship and heard through the grapevine that my ex and his fiancee (the gf I had seen him with), were calling off their engagement.

I’ve only had one vicious breakup, and I’ve only seen him since then once. I was headed to a formal event in college, dressed to kill, with a very attractive date’s leather jacket around my shoulders. Ex was taking out his trash in gym clothes. He had spent over a year making me feel so small, and in that moment with his eyes wide I just smirked like a goddess. I don’t know what I did to deserve such grace but when I have a bad day I think about that moment still! And it’s been 6 years!

On the other side of this meeting is usually another person usually feeling all the exact same things … use the occasion to put aside any baggage and remind yourself the feelings are probably about the ghost ship, not the person!

For at least 5 years after my ex broke up with me (over text I might add) I would see him once a year. It wouldn’t have been so bad but after he broke up with me I found out he had 3 other relationships with women who thought he was single so I was harbouring some pretty venomous unspoken feelings.
The first 2 times I was visiting people in the shopping centre he worked. So, fair enough right?
The third time was when I was having anniversary drinks with my new boyfriend, this time he was in my new town and I was furious that I felt I had to leave the bar we had gone to.
The fourth time, was on an airplane to Croatia where I was meeting a friend. Not only did we see each other but we had to squeeze past each other to get to our seats. He was with a new girlfriend and a group of friends and I looked like a loner. It was the worst.
Fifth time was in east London when I had moved jobs, he came into my bar and swiftly exited when I stared him down. It’s been a few years now thank goodness because it was getting ridiculous. Although looking back I think the universe was just giving me opportunities to gut punch him haha

I ran into the ex (with a Facebook message warning) at an open house for my class’s bachelor thesis projects. I distinctly remember him telling me all sorts of things and me not asking a single question. Definitely felt a bit cornered, since I had to be there at my booth.

Have since moved countries, so don’t expect to run into him anytime soon. One of his best friends does live in my new city, but still not so concerned! Plus, I’m infinitely happier with my new guy, who gets me in all the ways the ex didn’t, and connects so effortlessly with my family and friends. I couldn’t ask for better.

My small collection of ex-boyfriends all live too far away for me to run into them. My ex-husband lives less than a mile from me, and because we have two small kids, I see him at least once a week. And you know what? It’s great! He is constantly doing idiotic things that remind me I really, really needed the divorce and really, really dodged a bullet by getting out of my marriage when I did. It makes me so happy to say goodbye and go home to my own house.