Do or Don't: Thank You Notes

I’m a big etiquette nerd and love all things politesse, like making eye contact while toasting and tilting your soup spoon away. But I have to say, I’m not feeling thank you cards anymore.

Last weekend, I went to a dinner party at my friend Abbey‘s apartment. She and her husband made pasta and chicken cutlets and arugula salad with mustard vinaigrette. Wine was flowing, and for dessert, they busted out this chocolate pear tart. Everyone laughed and talked about books and movies and travel and gossip, and it was one of those perfect evenings that make you feel glow-y the whole next day.

On the cab ride home, I texted Abbey and raved about her hosting prowess. The next day, we emailed more about the night. She sent me the tart recipe. And, then, the following day… I wrote a thank you card.

But was it needed? It felt weirdly redundant after our many texts and emails.

For the host’s opinion, I asked Abbey and she said, “I loved your handwritten note, but loved even more getting a text or email the next day. Immediacy is wonderful.” Right?

Thoughts? Do you still love writing thank you cards? Getting them? Or can we all agree to skip them?

P.S. Funny NYC etiquette, and how to introduce people.

(Photo of letterpress cards by James Ransom/Food52.)