Motherhood

Toby and Anton in Conversation

Toby and Anton in Conversation

Have your kids (or kids you know) said anything funny recently? Eight-year-old Toby and four-year-old Anton have come out with some zingers that really make me laugh. Here are a few recent conversations we’ve had…

Anton, on a cold morning: “Mommy, do I have any long-sleeved shorts?”
Me: “You mean… kind of like pants?”

Anton: “There are two ways to make friends. You can go up to someone and say, do you want to be my friend and they’ll say sure. Or they can come up to you and say, do you want to be my friend and you’ll say sure.”

While I was making breakfast, Toby was playing on my computer. Afterward, I saw his adorable Google history: Fuller House actors; casual jackets for kids; toast.

Anton: “Yesternight.”

Toby: “I can’t wait to be a teenager.”
Me: “What is great about being teenager?”
Toby: “You can go on dates.”
Me: “Where would you want to go?”
Toby: “We would go to a Chinese restaurant. I would wear a tuxedo.”
Me: “And what do people do on dates?”
Toby: “Ask them little questions, like how was your day and what kind of car do you have.”

One afternoon, the boys decided they wanted to be rock stars. Toby said his stage name would be “Sting Anthony.” Anton wanted to be “The British.”

Me: “What is a brother?”
Anton: “A brother is better than a friend. Because you love them so much.”
Toby: “When I was 3, and it was January, I was a little lonely. And then Anton came.”

Last week, I got this note from Toby’s teacher: “Hi Joanna, I hope all is well. I wanted to share this drawing that Toby drew on Wednesday. He asked if he could color in a picture of Blake Shelton for his choice time, so I printed one out. I thought it was the cutest request.” (Agreed!) (The chest hair!)

What cute things have your kids been saying lately? I’d love to hear…

P.S. Kids in conversation, and trying out slow parenting.

  1. Emily says...

    My four year old niece is Cambodian, but I’m caucasian American. I’ve spoken Khmer (the Cambodian language) to her her entire life. She’s learning English as well and has been in the habit of only speaking English to me, although I respond in both languages. A few days ago she looked at me in amazement and said, “Aunty Emily, you speak Khmer too!” It only took her four years to realize that.

  2. Rachel says...

    I was lonely and then Anton came. Best. Comment. Ever.

  3. Sio says...

    Last night while my son was on the potty he let out a rather spectacular fart and said “that was a poo burp”
    I can’t stop laughing to myself!

  4. SM says...

    My 7yo is learning about the Titanic at school and they have to dress up as people on the Titanic at school next week. They can choose to be crew, passengers, the captain etc. I asked her who she wants to dress up as. Her response: “I don’t care…. as long as its someone who survives.” :)

  5. Sarah says...

    My 3-year-old says laster-year. “Do you remember when I rode on a pony laster-year mom? We should do that again.”

    About 20 times a day, my 7-year-old says, “Mom, is something under something?” Under where? “Ah, you said underwear, Mom!” Gosh, how do I keep falling for that one?!

  6. Emily says...

    my 4 yo daughter Gemma after hearing Justin Timberlake on the radio:
    who is this girl?
    me: well actually that’s a boy, his name is Justin Timberlake.
    gemma: a boy?? how does he sound so cute?

    • Liza says...

      Lol!

  7. Jan Parker says...

    My grandson in England was getting frustrated because he can run faster than his mates on the playground (best description of him is Mowgli in Jungle Book) so his mom had to have a talk with him about being a good sport. The following week as my daughter started a new job, she was complaining that the first week as a mom she was “rubbish”. That’s when my grandson turned around and took his mom by the arm and said,” mummy you should be a good sport to yourself.” Out of the mouths of babes :)

  8. Silvina says...

    “Yesternight” should definitely be a word.

  9. lilian krug says...

    Yesternight should be added to our vocabulary

  10. Nahal says...

    This week with Etienne, our 23 month old:

    Etienne (excitedly): “Placenta! Placenta! Placenta!”
    Me: “What! Who told you that word?”
    Etienne (grinning): “Santa Claus!”

    And, daily, for the past two months Etienne has been saying “Turn Eva off!” Eva is his baby sister.

  11. “Sting Anthony and the British” sounds like a real rock band! ?

  12. Hita Adwanikar says...

    Aww. My daughter has a little brother, and was tickled pink to discover that her uncle was my little brother. “Giggles, ….but he is not a baby!…. more giggles”.

  13. Kerri says...

    A few months ago, my 4-year-old told me that he loved me so much that the love spilled from his heart into his bloodstream and now he just has a Lovestream. I kind of feel like this is the perfect description of that overwhelming feeling of love and affection and gratitude you feel towards your special people and you just get all warm and gushy inside.

    • Karen says...

      “he loved me so much that the love spilled from his heart into his bloodstream and now he just has a lovestream” I’m quoting your 4 four year old. That was poetic.

    • rachel says...

      awww, love that.

  14. Kerri says...

    My 3-year-old daughter was so enamoured by my friends sequinned shirt and excitedly asked her, “Wow! Do you have sprinkles on your nipples?” Ummmm how do I get my kid to stop referring to the top half of someone’s body as their nipples??

  15. Kate says...

    My four year old looked up at the tv in the morning when we had on a news channel and he saw an image of the president. He told me, “Donald Trump brings me oranges”. I said, “no he doesn’t”, kiddo: “yes, he does”. Our guess is skin tone association. ?

  16. Rachel Youngman says...

    Sage (my son, 5yrs): Mum, I have a sore bone in my tummy.
    Quinn (my daughter, 2.5yrs): I told you not to eat any of those!

    These kids! They crack me up all the time.

    • Ada says...

      Hahaha

  17. Kate says...

    Oooooh Yesternight. So sweet. My son (when he was 2) would refer to everything in the past as “yesmorning”. Regardless of whether it actually was yesterday or three month ago.

  18. Anna says...

    My two year old loves Robin Hood and she thinks Little John’s name is “Rob The Rich.”

  19. My 7 year old recently went to a sleepover, where she stayed up until 2 a.m. (What?! I know. I can’t even) She was WRECKED for the next three days. Seriously, I didn’t even recognize this child who was inhabiting my daughter’s body.

    After grabbing an hour nap BEFORE camp on Tuesday, she woke up all perky and sweet, like her normal self.

    She looked at me and said, “Mommy, I’m sorry I acted a fool for the past couple days. My sleepover was REALLY hard on me.”

    • Luna says...

      Hahaha

  20. ALV says...

    I can’t wait until Toby FINALLY gets to go on a proper date! I’m sure he won’t want you to share it with the world, but I feel like he’s been ready to go on a date for years now!

  21. I took my friends kids out for dinner and, upon returning from the bathroom, the 9-year-old had a nervous, guilty look on his face. When I asked if everything was alright, he said, “Well…there was a sign that said ‘Employees must wash hands’ but I didn’t see any employees in there, so I just washed them myself…is that okay?!”

    I laughed so loudly three tables turned to look.

    • Megan says...

      OMG hahaha

  22. “Mom, when you were a kid you could only get fruit once a year, right? Because you were born in the 1900’s.”

    -My seven year old, Elliotte Jane

    • Gemima says...

      Oh yes! I love these. Our son then 7yo kept insisting we didn’t have planes when I was growing up.

  23. Jamie says...

    Dear Jo, thank you so, so very much for sharing the witty, funny, and endearing words your boys share. They make my heart melt every time.

  24. Malissa says...

    I was scurrying to a dentist appointment yesterday, and I think a mother and her 2 young daughters were doing the same. In the elevator, the mom said “We’ll only be ONE minute late – it’s a MIRACLE!”. One daughter, “Mom, what’s a ‘miracle’?” Mom, “It’s when something happens that you didn’t expect and you can hardly believe it.” Next daughter, “Are you being sarcastic?” Mom, “Nope. I mean it.” First daughter, “What is being sarcastic anyway?” :)

    • Pim says...

      so funny!

  25. Thu-Nhi says...

    Love these! Yesterday, my sister asked my 5-year old son if he would come to her wedding. He gave it some thought and said (worryingly), “I’m not sure I can make it… I think I have summer camp!” :)

  26. Lauri says...

    Anton says, “Yesternight” and my Everett (age 3) says “Lasterday.” I mean, these guys are the cutest.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      oh my gosh, TOO MUCH!!!

  27. Rue says...

    Just over here desperately wishing that’s what dates were like!

    • Lauren Lyons says...

      Ha! Ha! I googled “toast,” just to see what came up.

  28. Liz says...

    My little guy keeps telling me about things that happened “when I was little.” Very funny considering he’s only just about to turn three :)

  29. Anna Potter says...

    So freakin adorable! I have 2 boys, 3 1/2 & 19 months and their little bloomong relationship makes my heart explode. Can’t wait to hear these kinds of conversations x

  30. Kim says...

    My daughter spooked me behind a door today and I yelped and jumped a little. She said, “I’m not a monster, mommy.”

    She’s so sweet and just two.

  31. Oh my STARS with the Blake Shelton! I absolutely love that! my 8 year old son recently saw that there’s a new Brazilian waxing salon in a shopping center near our house and excitedly yelled, “Look, Mom! We got a new wax museum!”

    • Amy says...

      Ha!

  32. Elizabeth says...

    There was some disappointment this morning when my 3.5 year old found out we weren’t in fact going “boating” before school. I knew our wires were crossed when he brought up the Golden Gate Bridge as I tried to explain civic duty. It was not quite as exciting to visit the local high school, but he held onto hope even then and said he would save his breakfast to-go waffles “for the boat.”

    • Hita says...

      Awww.

  33. My 3.5 year old has been saying “I’m a little bit four” as her means of getting me to let her do big-girl stuff. Hey husband has now taken up the quote as a new life motto for himself “I’m a little bit 30” – he’s 42! Kids are brilliant.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      oh my gosh, that is so so cute, tiffany!

    • Natasha says...

      Oh my goodness! I just turned 42 myself and am TOTALLY going to use “I’m a little bit 30” from now on. Love it!!!

  34. Cece says...

    My two and a half year old has just got some amazing little phrases and quirks at the moment.

    – She calls all her adored dolls after vegetables – currently Sally, Salad and Coomber (she can’t quite say Cucumber).

    – She says ‘yes my am!’ Instead of ‘yes I am’ and ‘I want to do it by my own!’ is a much-heard comment.

    – She can’t quite say T at the end of a word so it’s ‘cop’ instead of cot and ‘rainsoup’ instead of rainsuit.

    – Today I took her to a community farm and eventually realised she was walking around with her hands clenched behind her back. When I asked her she said ‘I don’t want the animals to eat my hands off, mummy. I need them to eat my lunch.’

    • Aya says...

      This is like my daughter of the same age!
      “That make my SAD!!” and “Frog in my throap” are some of my favorites. :)

    • Kristie says...

      Me too: “mummy look at the catroach”

  35. Just this weekend I asked my 20-month old what fun things he wanted to do that day. He looked up at me completely seriously and said “basketball goal”. About 5 minutes later I asked him what he had bumped his head on to get the bruise that was there, again he looked up and said, “basketball goal”. I think it might be a concussion….

    One more- later that day my husband surprised me with a bag of Doritos. We were splashing around in the baby pool in our backyard and I let my son have one. Then I explained, this is junk food and we can’t eat junk food too often. He took his chip and continues playing. He came up to me a few minutes later and said, “want ‘nother junk food!” Ha!

  36. Soph says...

    my almost-two-year-old calls pants “knee-shirts” even though pants is objectively easier to say. She also hates getting dressed so you’ll regularly hear her indignantly shouting, “No Knee-Shirt! NO KNEE-SHIRT!”

    • Gemima says...

      LMAO.

      She’s thinking it’s a shirt to cover her knees, love it.

  37. I am a stepmom to a 6-year-old boy, Hunter. I absolutely LOVE being a stepmom and my stepson is the greatest little human. He calls me by the nickname my oldest niece came up with when she couldn’t pronounce “Krista”–“Kisser.” This weekend, on his visit to stay with us, he was cracking me up more than usual:

    Hunter: Dad, why do you like to pinch all the babies’ cheeks so much?
    [my husband is from Turkey]
    Me: It’s a Turkish thing. In Turkey, they all pinch the babies cheeks.
    Hunter: Why?
    Erman: Because the babies are so cute!
    Hunter: Well. Dad, I really think you should just only do that to the Turkeys. And leave the Americans alone.

    Hunter: Ugh! Kisser, did you see those geese by the road?! I HATE geese! Do you know why?
    Me: No, why?
    Hunter: When I was three years old, they stole my sandwich and ate it all! They’re the worst. I would punch them in the face if I knew how!
    Me: Wow. You’re still harboring intense feelings about this. And I’m sorry about your sandwich but remember, we don’t want to hurt animals. We love animals. They’re a special gift on earth.
    Hunter: No way! Not geese! They are definitely not special. They’re stupid. And I know we’re not supposed to say “stupid” but I kind of think it’s okay for geese.
    Me: You sound really passionate about this.
    Hunter: I am.

    Me: What are you doing?
    Hunter: Just sitting on you.
    Me: Why?
    Hunter: So I can lay my eggs.

    Me: Well what time did you wake up?
    Hunter: I don’t know. I just wake up at the time my eyes fly open.

    Me: Don’t scream like that, you crazyhead. The neighbors are going to think we’re beating you.
    Hunter: [yells toward the wall] DON’T WORRY! IT’S JUST A TICKLE FIGHT, FOLKS!

    Seriously, being a stepmom is THE GREATEST blessing of my life.

    • Larissa says...

      I love this so much!!!

    • Gemima says...

      Kisser! what an awesome name. You must smile inside & out whenever you hear that.

      Our Stepdad is awesome! My kids were devastated their Papa wasn’t blood-related to them from me. I told them, he’s the only man who wanted to be our Dad so that’s more love to us kids.

  38. My 2 1/2 year old wanted to see my phone the other day and I said no. So he replied, “Mama, I wanted to help you push the buttons.” Too smart!

  39. Rachel says...

    My brother in law is an elementary school French teacher. A while back, he was recess monitor…..

    Boy A: Tries to hug BIL
    BIL: (gently) Oh, no, you can’t touch Monsieur!
    Boy B: No, you can’t touch Monsieur! He’s fragile!!

  40. Adrienne says...

    (crying comes from the bathroom)
    Me: Everything okay in there?
    6-year old: Yeah, I just thought that I had four arms and two heads for a second.

    • HH says...

      LOL!!! That would make me cry, too!

      So many of these are just making my day. :)

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      awwww :) :)

    • Luna says...

      Moments like that make we want to cry with them.

    • OMG I’m shaking with laughter at my desk right now!! The poor wee fella!

  41. Elise Pelletier says...

    My 4 year old son always hears me call my husband “baby”. One day he declared that “Baby is a nick word for people who aren’t babies”! I couldn’t have said it better.

  42. Desiree White says...

    The comments about being brothers!! So stinkin sweet!

  43. sasha says...

    I care for children at my in home preschool. I have two four year old girls who love to help with our garden. We have mustard greens that the kids all think are yucky, but they know I love to eat, so they’ll pick for me every day. And every day Jenna calls the mustard greens *mayo* and Maggie calls them *ranch*, and every day I tell them “mustard, girls, mustard!” Every. Single. Day.

  44. Nicole says...

    My daughter is 3 1/2 and is full of spirit and quotable moments. My favorites lately are “mommy look at my face, hear my words, I not happy” or storming down the hall saying “never again” at the top of her lungs. She will randomly say “What’s the big idea” with her hands on her hips and when she’s happy its “Oh yeah I so cited” when she’s tired she likes to curl up on the couch to “get comfily and take a lax” when asked at school what she wants to do when she grows up her response was “live in the jungle and eat chicken nuggets”

  45. Kara says...

    I have this adorable baby cousin that I get to facetime every Wednesday. I live far away from my family but my mom babysits him every week, so it’s been routine since he was only months old. It’s one of the highlights of my week, every week.

    He’s almost 2 now and he’s repeating everything everybody says. A few weeks ago, when I was signing of the call, I told him and my mom I loved them and my mom responded with “I love you. Goodbye, Sweetheart!” and he repeated it. Now he’s always saying “goodbye sweetheart” and it makes my heart clench with joy and humor every time I think about it.

  46. I have three boys, ages 10, 5 and 5 months, so there’s a lot of hilarity.

    Recently my 10 year old, Ethan, started calling everyone lady (ie “hold your horses, lady” or “calm down, lady”). To the point where Oliver, age 5, said “Mom tell Ethan to stop calling me lady.” Ethan also decided he wants to be a geologist because he can’t handle anything involving “bloodshed,” like being a doctor or police officer. Poor kid is sooo squeamish that I have to tell all his teachers that even a mention of blood (like in a lesson on the circulatory system) will cause him to “pale out,” his term for fainting. Lol.

    Oliver is absolutely in love with 5 month old Harry, and also me. He’s taken to calling us MommyHeart and BabyHeart, I guess because heart indicates love? Which is especially precious because he’s the most naturally athletic, rough and tumble human child I’ve ever met.

    The other day he chipped a baby tooth. Later he commented that one of my teeth looked chipped. I explained that it wasnt chipped, just crooked, because I never had braces. He said, “don’t ever get braces because I love you too much like this.” Omg. That one comment solved years of self-consciousness about my crooked teeth.

    • Lorna Diwa says...

      Oh my heart! These were all gold but “I love you too much like this” truly made my day. What precious boys you have! :)

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      oh my gosh, what a beautiful moment <3

    • Nothing makes me feel more beautiful than my little boy loving simply everything about me. I kissed him once recently and I apologized for my coffee breath. He said, “That’s OK, Mom. You always smell like love.”

    • I, too, have a crooked tooth that looks chipped (depending on the angle) that I’m selling consensus about. Your sweet boy’s words to you warm my heart. ??

  47. Helga says...

    When my now 22-year-old son was about three and we were on a long drive home we decided to stop for lunch. He said that he wanted a ham sandwich and I told him that he could have whatever he wanted but the restaurant might not have ham sandwiches. He responded with “When we get there we can ask the dinner lady if we can see her map”

  48. T says...

    Sometimes my kids’ comments make me want to crawl in a hole…like when my 6 year old asked his great aunt (age 65) if she were pregnant and my 3 year old piped in with, “is it puppies?!?”

    • Gemima says...

      OMG can you imagine the headlines if that were true? lol

  49. Luna says...

    I can’t even get my Husband to wear a tuxedo and he’s in his 40’s.

    On the question of, “what kind of car do you have” our son also 8yo asked my Husband how much money somebody earned. I can’t remember who. But we told him it’s not proper to ask about money. His reply, “But I really want to know.”
    Lol

  50. My son has just turned three, but he’s always been very vocal and speaks well for his age. His occasional mispronunciations are just so funny and cute, I don’t correct them:
    – Ups and downs = upside down
    – Tatum = tumtum/tummy
    – Coonter = computer/iPad

    The saddest thing is when he grows out of a cute mispronunciation, and acts like we are insane for saying it so strangely! He used to talk about ‘turn the ‘ot on/off’, which meant lights, as light = hot in his head. And called ice cream ‘ah-keem’ and bum cream ‘bu-keem’. Now he very superiorly corrects us if we use these old pronunciations. ?

    • Jen says...

      My daughter recently turned 4, and for more than 6 months now, she says “up-eye-side-down” for upside down. I love it too much to correct it.

    • Rachel Youngman says...

      My 2.5yr old says “up-see-down” for “upside-down”. Love it so much!

  51. Maria says...

    Yesterday morning, my husband found the 2,5 years old Nora to the bed of her twin sister. When she saw him she said: I am in Maria’s bed. Her father asked why, and Maria answered: I was throwing a party, Daddy, and I invited her.
    Today, walking to school (its their second day there), Nora said: Mommy this school is ours, not yours. But don’t worry, you will go to school when you will get older!

  52. Ella says...

    Haha! Love these! Anton’s long sleeved shorts one makes me think of a kid in my class who was wearing tights/stockings and while putting her shoes on her shoes shouted out “Look Miss D! I’m wearing pants socks!”

    • Karen says...

      HAHAHAHA PANTS SOCKS

    • MariaE. says...

      So funny. Spanish is my mother tongue and if I am not wrong tights/stockings are still called ‘pant socks’ (‘medias pantalón’) in my home country. I don’t live there any longer and vocabulary have changed a lot since I was a kid.

    • Philine says...

      Pant socks (or rather sock pant) would actually be correct in german too ;) Tights are called ‚Strumpfhose‘.

    • Cora says...

      My daughter always called tights pants with feet.

  53. Corinne says...

    My three year old, whispering sweet nothings into my ear as we cuddle at bedtime: “you smell like pepperoni!”

  54. Jo says...

    Omg Anton, we’re soul mates!
    When I was a kid I couldn’t pronounce shorts, so I called it ‘short-sleeved pants’ (in Swedish though.)

  55. Sara says...

    My son, 6: Mom, can you come please?
    Me: I will be there in a minute.
    Son: the long or the short one?

    • C says...

      Love this!!

  56. Jamie says...

    The other day I told my 4 year-old daughter we were going to call Grandma and she said “her face or her ear?”

    • Aya says...

      This gave me such a chuckle. Sweet!

  57. This is too cute! My one year old obviously doesn’t say much yet but he’s just progressed past “mama” and now says “mapa?” when he enters every room, expecting his papa to be there instead of at work <3

    • june2 says...

      ‘mapa’ is GENIUS.

  58. Sadie says...

    My son, 5 on Thursday, has always been chatty, and sort of narrates everything– we call it his outer monologue. Lately, he has been describing things in this kind of recursive way: “Mama! That bird lifted up and FLEW with its wings! It flew with its wings right into the sky!” or “I picked it up with my hands, and then I ate it with my mouth.” The less-cute downside is that he describes EVERYTHING in the same extensive detail: “Mama? I farted. I just felt a fart that was going to come out, and then it went OUT of my butt, like, TOOOOOOOT! And then it went into the air and I smelled it.” Thanks, son, I needed the play-by-play. One day I walked into the bathroom, not knowing he was in there, and he was saying to himself, “I’m just getting a little toilet paper… wrapping it around… and doing a butt thing. Which was WIPING IT.” I can’t decide how this is going to go over when he’s in school.

    • KayN says...

      this made me LOL so hard! and i don’t even have kids.

  59. Ana says...

    Some months ago my son (4 years old) said: “Mummy, when you die, will you go to Jerusalem?” And I said: “No, I will go to heaven. Jerusalem is a real city, in a country called Israel”. And then he said: “Israel… Like in the Smurfs??” (he had heard something similar with Azrael and Gargamel hahaha)

    • Luna says...

      Can you imagine a Smurfs heaven? lol. Our son can’t wait to go to Heaven and see his “other Papa”.

  60. Kim says...

    My 2y/o daughter counting, “…eighteen, nineteen… ten teen!”. I definitely appreciate the logic here. :)

    • SM says...

      Hahaha my 4yo counting: “twenty-eight, twenty-nine, twenty-ten, twenty-eleven…” :)

  61. Courtenay says...

    We’re expecting baby number two any time and in an effort to prepare our 3 1/2 year old we were giving her a run down one night at dinner of different scenarios that might play out.

    Me: “So if you wake up in the morning and Nana is here, that means mommy and daddy are at the hospital having the baby”.

    To which our daughter replied after a long pause: “….you know, my friend at daycare used to be allergic to cheese but she’s not anymore”.

    • Luna says...

      LOL, that is so my son too!

  62. Krisanne says...

    My 4-year-old son is suuuper interested in private parts and has expressed pity toward me for not having boy parts like him. Just the other morning he exclaimed, totally out of the blue, “Mommy, you don’t have a scrotum. That is a nightmare!”

    • Anne says...

      Bahahaha. That is funny!

  63. Liz says...

    My 2 yo was picking his nose for a loooong time today.

    Me: Finding anything good in there?
    Him: Yes. Nose wax.

  64. Ah, Toby and Anton are just adorable. I love that you recorded these. I actually started a blog because so many mums had said that they regretted not writing the things their kids say down somewhere. I love going back to them year after year too.

    Thanks for sharing a little piece of your boys with us!

  65. MFree says...

    My 6 year old son said he loved Andrea (the school secretary). I asked him how he knew he was in love and he said ‘Everytime I look at her I blush’.

    • Luna says...

      Aww, what a darling!

  66. from my three year old, as we were waiting for cookies to come out of the oven…
    ‘Mama, can I have a cookie.’
    -not right now.
    ‘Can I have una galleta?’
    -no, sweetie.
    ‘Can I have a biscuit?’

    • Gemima says...

      Haha, love it.

      3yo kids are weird & wonderful treasures.

  67. Alex says...

    My 2.5 year old:
    To a play date host as we were leaving, “Thank you for having me a wonderful day!”
    Singing a song to make her friend laugh, “Bah bah black sheep have you any….BANANAS?!”
    me: 5 minutes till we go home for dinner. her: How about 2 minutes? (She hasn’t quite got the counting thing down yet.)

    Kids are the best.

    • My three year old son does this last one! I tell him I’ll give him 10 more minutes of play time, and then we have to go. He says, “2 more minutes, mama!” and gets REALLY upset when I try to explain that 10 is more than 2… ??‍♀️

  68. Kim G says...

    I’m so tired after running after my two toddlers, its hard to think of what funny conversations I’ve overheard lately.
    I love how my daughter is obsessed with “bessert” (dessert) and everything I try to convince my son to do (mostly to put on his pants) “I don’t need it/to!”
    I can wholeheartedly tell you all that hearing your two kids (who are just 17 months apart) converse, whilst in their own little world is one of the most magical parts of parenting more than one.
    My son is older and hearing him encourage his sister, or grab her hand to walk her somewhere while saying, “Come on Ellie, this way,” is pure magic.

  69. Sarah says...

    The British! Best. Name. Ever.

  70. Sarah says...

    My 4 yr old “Mom, what is a lighthouse?”
    Me “It’s a tall building with a light that shines at the edge of a large body of water like a lake or ocean. It shows the ships where the shore is so they don’t run into it. ”
    4 yr old “Aaaaaand the president lives there? ”
    Me “Oh, no, that’s the White House. ”
    4 yr old “Oh.”

  71. Joy says...

    Toby and Anton makes me want to have two boys!!! My second baby is due on December and we’re still waiting for the next scan to know the gender. It would be fun to have a boy-girl combo but the conversations between your boys says it’s okay to have two boys in our house!

  72. Laura says...

    Oh My Gosh – both Anton’s and Toby’s comments about being brothers just made my heart melt. They are so, so sweet. I have two little boys as well (3.5 and 6 months old), and I hope they love each other forever. Thanks for sharing these!

  73. Simone says...

    Today in the grocery store, I was explaining to my 3 year old that he couldn’t have any more cheese samples because if he ate them all, wouldn’t all the other little kids who wanted samples be so sad? To which he immediately replied, “but I would be sooooo happy!”

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      awwww hahahaha

    • Shannon says...

      Hahh! this is the best

  74. Claire says...

    I was in the car with my son the other day (4.5) and when we got to our destination, he told me he needed an “ant minute” before we got out. I asked him how long that was and he explained that ants were tiny, so it was a very short amount of time. As I started to get my stuff ready, he amended it to a “bumble bee minute” because he needed just a little more time.

    • Gemima says...

      Smart kid, I say.

  75. Shannon says...

    In the middle of supper the other night, after being unusually quiet for a good 5 mins, my 3.5 year old son suddenly announced “Angels are nocturnal”.

    • Liz says...

      Something about picturing this situation is just cracking me up. Bless littles and their randomness!

    • Allison says...

      Shannon, that’s lovely!

      I also have a 3.5 year old son. The other night he had a scary dream about a dinosaur in the corner of his room. One of the (many) things I said to comfort him in the middle of the night was “your angels are protecting you.” Next time I will be sure to add that they are nocturnal :)

  76. Leanne riddett says...

    Lucy 5: (now 24) “Mom how does Grandma Maisie know about dad when he was a little boy?”
    Me: “Because she’s his Mom”
    Lucy: “Whaaaaaat??? – Steph! Steph! Did you know that Grandma Maisie is Dads MUM?!?!?!”

    • Luna says...

      I love it when kids discover the concept of relationships.

  77. lomagirl says...

    Toby’s love for Anton- and the reciprocation- so sweet! I got the nose tingles/wet eyes.

  78. Sarah says...

    I was on a hike last weekend and watched an older brother (maybe 8) help his younger brother (5?) over a rocky stream. As the younger brother leapt from a rock to the bank, the elder brother stood akimbo and announced, “now that’s what I call determination!”

    ♥️ = melted

  79. Jessica O'Malley says...

    My 2 1/2 year old son started saying “tomorrow’s day” and I will never correct it because it’s just too cute!

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      so so cute!

  80. Kristen says...

    I have such a wonderful sense of Toby and Anton from these conversations. What big-hearted, thoughtful, funny kids.

    I hope someday my sons will feel as warmly about each other! My 3 year old is constantly hustling keep up with his big brother. It’s sweet and sometimes tragic to see how hard he works to please and how alert he is to social relationships. (We’ve been reading the Little House on the Prairie books together and whenever there’s a grass fire or plague of grasshoppers or a blizzard, his first, desperate question is: “Where is Baby Carrie?!” I think he completely identifies with the kid who isn’t mentioned for chapters.) This recent attempt to participate really made me smile:

    6yo: Mama, what does substitution mean?
    3yo: That’s what Stevie Wonder sings about!!
    6yo (totally exasperated): UGGGHH! Paul! That’s superstition.

    • Gemima says...

      I still listen to Stevie Wonder and from now on, I will only hear ‘substitution’. lol

  81. omg, the search history! I hope you’ll be sharing a round-up of casual jackets for kids :)

    I recently decided to start drawing the funny things my three-year-old says (https://www.instagram.com/dacijaye/) and somehow I’ve managed to do it for almost 60 days straight! I never really conceptualized before how she makes me laugh every. single. day. Kids are the best. (and also the worst?)

    • Amanda says...

      Love your Instagram! Those quotes and drawings are too funny!!

    • Ellie E says...

      Fun feed!!

  82. Jamie says...

    Anton is pretty much right about friendship.

  83. JMT says...

    I am singing. Georgia (2.5) says:
    “I don’t like that song… I want you to turn it off in your mouth”

    Georgia, with total matter-of-fact confidence: “I want to see a video of a unicorn riding a train. With its tail out.”

    Me: Georgia, do you know what cats’ whiskers are for?
    Georgia: Yeah.
    Frances (5), confidently: She doesn’t.

  84. Caroline says...

    I have 2 boys: ages 8 and 5 years old. 8 is into all things science. 5 is a “man’s man”, if that makes sense.
    One evening, 8 declares: “I’m going to bring my rocks and geodes for show and tell tomorrow!”
    5 says, without missing a beat: “I bet only one person in your class will do this.” And he proceeds stand up and “slow clap”.

    Mic drop! Well played! Touche! It was one of the funniest interactions I have seen/heard between my boys.

    • Luna says...

      Almost fell out of my couch laughing! Your 5yo is very similar to our 8yo son.

  85. Pip McNee says...

    That is so adorable – those boys! Toby is clearly going to be a style director for GQ when he’s older – or now for a kidszine. What a great teacher it is the cutest request! Enjoy these moments and thanks for sharing them Jo. Px

  86. Deb says...

    My favorite comment, said in total seriousness, and then he was drifting away as only a boy can, “I think I am turning into a woodpecker.”

  87. Jenna Brown says...

    My daughter also says yesternight and i love it.

  88. Molly K says...

    Oh my gosh, the lucky person who gets to go on a date with Toby (when he’s older of course). I’m jealous, haha! He would be the sweetest date!

    • Lesley says...

      Same here!

  89. “Casual jackets for kids” – dies of cuteness overload.

    • Megan Klein says...

      it’s so sweet how into fashion Toby is! my all-time fav picture of him is the one in the little suit jacket when you went to the italian restaurant for the date. love his stretchy pants.

  90. Carrie says...

    I don’t have kids, but I met the cutest three year old when I was hanging out in the park with my dog. She asked about twenty questions about him (does he poop in the water? does he poop on you?) before asking if she could give him a hug. It was the sweetest hug I’ve ever seen.

  91. Alyssa says...

    My 4-year-old: “When I get my muscles, I’m going to crush that bad guy.”

  92. Danielle says...

    When my son Scott was 2, we visited Scottsdale. Throughout the trip, he kept asking “When are we going to get to ‘Mydale’!”

    Another cute one was when his aunt asked him what color are Mommy’s eyes? His response: pickle color.

    Last one – He was just over 2 and I was expecting baby #2 and stated “I know how babies come out but how do they get in there?”

    He is now 29….miss those days :) I have 3 kids altogether but I don’t recall any cute comments from #2 and #3 (I was probably too busy as they were all close in age)!

    • liz says...

      Mydale! I hope he’s still so sweet.