Relationships

Best Reader Comments of All Time

Best Reader Comments of All Time

I can’t tell you enough how grateful we are for this smart, funny community of women. So, to turn the spotlight on the special daily conversations that happen in the comment section, we rounded up some of our favorite reader quotes that have made us laugh, cry and rethink our own lives over the years. (Stella recently turned to me and said, “Are our readers… Oprah?”)

On parenting:

“The key to parenting is spending time with the children on their terms. A grandmother I know has a grandson who’s 16 — and she likes to sit in his room and watch as he plays computer games. He talks a lot when she sits there, whereas he says practically nothing if he has to sit with the elders in the living room. I found that so inspiring.” — Marianna on Slow Parenting

“My 1.5 year old loves it when I shake out the new garbage bag before putting it in the can. She always says ‘Mama!’ afterward in this admiring tone of voice.” — Ramona on Things That Enchant Children

“My dad always made my sister and I his ‘famous’ scrambled eggs – perfect fluffy eggs with a side of toast. A few years ago, my then-foster teen (now adopted kid) was having a particularly tough time, so we sent her over to my parents’ house. And yup, she got a ‘famous.’ ” — Sarah on Signature Dinners

“My parents, being Chinese immigrants, were like, ‘What is the tooth fairy?’ So I had to tell my dad that it wasn’t a real thing but it was just something nice for growing up. He shrugged and gave me $10.” — Betty on Tooth Fairy Ideas

“The best advice I ever received as a young parent came from my mom, who told me, ‘You don’t need a lot of money to have fun and raise happy children.’ She told me to do things they will remember, like going for a walk in the dark, looking at the stars and watching the boats go through the drawbridge. These are the things, she told me, that your kids will remember. And she was right.” — Annette on Slow Parenting

On relationships:

“My husband and I recently had a night to ourselves, and he came up with this game where we’d blurt out a number, say 12, and the other person had to tell a story about something that happened to them at that age. It was great digging into the nooks and crannies of our brains for stories we still hadn’t told each other.” — Candice on Dinner Icebreakers

“Something I once read really shifted my feelings about appearance. The writer asked us to think about the people in our lives that we deeply love. What do they look like? Are they models? Thin? Perfect? I began to think of some of my dear friends in their 80’s, wrinkled and grey. My brother, who is insanely tall, hairy, with a funny underbite. I realized I don’t love them because of their looks. I love them because of who they are, their beautiful hearts, their generosity and loyalty. My thinking shifted about my own looks and I realized the people who love me most feel that way. The fact that the sun-spot on my cheek is getting bigger or that my neck is getting saggy in my forties has nothing to do with it. I have to love myself for the same reasons.” — Twlya on Seeing My Body With Fresh Eyes

“My gold standard of friendship is my mom. When she was a young mother, she got together other mothers in the neighborhood for a book club, which then evolved into a ‘we didn’t read the book anyway, let’s choose a play or go to a class this month’ club. This summer they are going to a villa in Spain for their 25th anniversary. They call themselves the Goddesses, and they all came to my bridal shower and sent cards when my first baby arrived.” — Katie on The Joy of All-Female Gatherings

“My biggest breakup advice: buy new sheets. It feels good to sleep in a refreshed bed that’s newly ALL YOURS after sharing it with a former partner (even if you didn’t live together).” — Katie on A Guide to Heartbreak

On career:

“‘What if I told you that you could make $5,000 by having a five-minute conversation? Then would you do it? Because that’s what it is.’ This is the question my husband asks (also to himself) when someone has to negotiate their salary.” — Rachel on How to Ask for a Raise

“The two biggest things that I urge people to remember as they step into leadership roles are:
1. Hold everyone to the same standards. People notice if you let your ‘favorite’ employee arrive three minutes late but come down hard on the newbie or the person who is struggling.
2. Communicate early and often. Problems don’t just go away, and it’s much easier to address them when they’re little things instead of waiting until they blow out of proportion. If you create a culture where feedback is not only expected, but encouraged and craved, your whole team will consistently strive to improve and grow.” — Allison on How to Be a Boss

“Something I’ve learned: body language says a lot. Look people in the eye, especially if you’re meeting them for the first time or listening to anyone speak. Stand up straight and pull your shoulders back, especially if you’re feeling unsure about yourself. Find something to do with your hands.” — Cindy on Lessons I’ve Learned in My Career

On entertaining:

“Resist the urge at the beginning of the party to put out enough chairs for the first few guests. There will be one person who doesn’t fit on the couch, and that’s okay! It helps to keep the energy up and the conversation flowing.” — Mia on Very Easy Dinner Party

“When I started working as a line cook, I realized how easy and flexible salads could be, so now a go-to dinner is [insert leftover] and a salad. Often we have enough leftovers for what feels like not-quite-dinner, and adding a fresh salad is really nice. I usually just do a mustard vinaigrette on kale or balsamic vinaigrette with romaine and shaved hard cheese (pecorino or parmesan or asiago) with whatever veggies we have around.” — Emma on Easy Dinners

“Clean your windows inside and out! Nothing makes a room feel brighter and fresher than clean windows.” — Katrina on Budget Ways To Transform Your Home

On life advice:

“My dad counsels people dealing with trauma and major anxiety, and once offhandedly mentioned a suggestion he gave to a client: When you’re out, look for people being nice to each other. Having sweet interactions. Look for friends getting coffee or a person holding open a door or strangers saying ‘how you doin’?’ or a dad kissing the top of his daughter’s head. And in Brooklyn, if you look for them, you get to see these tiny magic interactions everywhere. It’s gotten me through moments of secret darkness; it makes me well up with love for all these sweet, fragile, striving people around me; and for the gentle, kind man I learned it from.” — Ari on A Personal Note

“Oh, how I wish I could have a time machine to tell myself…
1. Wear sunscreen, wear sunscreen, wear sunscreen.
2. Appreciate the body you have. You’ll look back at pictures and wonder why you were so critical of yourself.
3. Apply for jobs that seem out of reach. Successful people don’t take jobs where they already know how to do everything that is required.
4. When dating, ask yourself if they are right for you instead of trying to be right for them.
5. Enjoy all that pre-parenthood time to read, take walks and talk to friends for hours.
6. Spend time with your grandmother. You’re going to miss her more than you can imagine.” — Jill on Advice to My Younger Self

“I have to say, I brought a ‘just-in-case dress’ on my recent trip that was red and short and showed some (okay, a lot) of cleavage AND GUESS WHAT?! I ended up having a magical night in Byron Bay, Australia, in that dress — that included a reggae concert, dancing on a beach under a full moon and a cute boy from England. So, ladies, I am team ‘just-in-case dress.'” — MO on What Not to Bring on Vacation

“Do not drive around town, windows down, with Vanilla Ice blasting. You look like an a**hole.” — Tami on Advice to My Younger Self

You are the best. Thank you again for reading.

P.S. 15 career tips from smart women, and how you know your partner is the one.

  1. Laurel says...

    Loved this! And FYI for any readers in Canberra, Australia, I am totally up for a COJ Godesses Book Club!

  2. K says...

    I couldn’t love this more! I get so much joy out of reading the comments section – it always feels like a warm hug from a BFF. I know there was some talk about a potential CoJ reader meet up – is that something that’s still on the table? xx

  3. Bernadine S. says...

    This is great! The collective wisdom is amazing. I agree with a lot of the other commentors. More, please!

  4. Jill’s “Time Machine” comment on “Advice to my younger self” is possibly the best bit of advice that I’ve seen in ages. Thanx so much Jill & Joanna!

  5. Claire says...

    Love this post. Always love the comments. Have you ever considered starting a YouTube channel to go alongside the blog? I would love to see videos of some of your posts too ❤️

  6. Julee says...

    The comment about the reader’s mother’s bookclub going on 25 years (!!!) gave me the kick in the pants to get out the invitation to my first ever neighborhood bookclub meeting (that I’d been too shy to organize for a year).
    And guess what? People are coming! People are already saying yes, they’ll read the book and come to book club. 😀
    Thank you, more than you know, for this community.

  7. JB says...

    You guys should definitely be proud that you definitely could make this a regular feature. The comments section here is often as meaningful and valuable as the content, and that is so rare. Thanks, as always, for being an uplifting place on the internet.

  8. Amanda says...

    If I were stuck on a dessert island, and could only read one thing for the rest of my time, it would be this blog. Good, bad, or meh day, this is my favourite place for a pick me up. I honestly always scan through the comments after reading a post, because I find them just as insightful and lovely to read. <3

  9. Resi says...

    I can only repeat what the other commenters are saying: loving the community and the comments especially! Thanks for providing us with your interesting articles and opening up this space for all your readers to mingle. Loving it! I keep coming back and also sending out links to my friends and family of articles that I feel they need to know about too! Looking forward to come back again and again. Happy weekend!

  10. Barbara says...

    This is legit the best thing to read right now. Just got some bummer news and feeling like a failure and then reading these gentle and funny and sweet and savvy comments from other readers, imperfect but awesome women like me, made my night turn around. Love this uplifting community!

    • Christina says...

      Aww I’m sorry about your bummer news, but you are the furthest thing from a failure! “Imperfect but awesome” is a great description!

  11. Hannah D. says...

    This is probably the one blog I’ve ever read where the comments section is often just as informative, lovely & wise as the actual post! A rare thing :)

  12. stephanie says...

    This blog has the best readers, and its the only place I dare read the comments.

  13. Katie says...

    This has been one of the most wonderful posts. It brought tears to my eyes multiple times.

  14. Twyla says...

    Thank you, Cup of Jo Ladies! You’ve totally made my whole week!

  15. Jenny says...

    I love this! Please do this again!!

  16. I wish we could “like” peoples comments!

    • Laura says...

      LIKE!!!

    • Lisa Magnusson says...

      Like!!!!

  17. Alice says...

    Please make this a regular post, such gems of wisdom and humour here. Jill you speak the TRUTH!
    I always find inspiration, advice, hilarity, kindness, and support in the comments here and love all the intelligent and witty personalities. What I find unique is how people’s feelings, opinions, and politics are always respected, even during strong disagreement between readers. There’s so much bitching online and there’s none here. Love that. Possibly why I’ve been reading COJ for 10+ years, and always the comments. Well that and the spectacular content!!!

  18. I really loved reading Ari’s comment on A Personal Note. Looking for kindness in others starts as an exercise and ends up a habit. Ari’s father sounds like a wonderful man.

    • Emily M. says...

      That really resonated with me as well!

    • Me too. It combats “secret darkness” like nothing else does. And to me makes me look outside, and in this light, than inside.

  19. Marissa says...

    I love Ari’s comment, it is so true :)
    Yesterday in santa cruz, i saw a lady treating a homeless man’s feet. Together they sat on a sidewalk. She was so warm and caring!

  20. I’m the Betty from the tooth fairy comment! So happy to be featured haha :)

    • Linda says...

      I teared up for some reason, reading this comment. It was so relatable :)

    • Congee says...

      Haha! I loved that one too, I’m also second generation!

  21. beks says...

    I’d totally *high five* anyone rocking out to Vanilla Ice.

    • Kate says...

      Sometimes the day just demands that you drive around with your windows open belting out Ice Ice Baby. I’m not going to judge on that on unless you are also yelling obscenities at people.

  22. Sarah J says...

    Ari’s comment is so true of my life right now- I’m currently in a life season where my childhood dog, my little sister, myself and my husband are all camping out in our 1 bedroom apartment, due to external family circumstances. Having to walk the (nearly) house trained four legged guest has been getting me out of the house, and I’ve been finding moments of wonder on these walks that are keeping me going better than almost anything else. Last week I saw a woman riding her bike with a sunhat stuck underneath her helmet, and yesterday I had a lovely and long whistled conversation with a currawong (an Australian magpie- like bird). Definitely finding that witnessing the smallest moments of wonder can remind me of who I am- and give me back my joy, even in the secret darkness. And this place you’ve created Joanna, is a place I can always find my joy too.

    • Maria says...

      Getting a dog has been, by far, the most effective improvement I’ve made in my life – not only for the dog himself (which would be more than enough!), but also for having to walk him twice a day, no matter the weather. I’ve never come back home from one of these walks feeling worst than I did when I left, even if it’s the middle of a rainy day in winter and I have a bad flu, and more often than not I actually feel so much better. Also, the scenes I’ve witnessed and the kind hellos from fellow dog-walkers are sometimes the best part of the day. If you are willing and able to give them the love they deserve, dogs really are amazing companions and will change and improve your life in many, many ways!

    • dana says...

      I wholeheartedly agree with Maria. I adopted my dog 10 years ago and he has been the best, most constant friend I’ve ever had. I hope I’ve made him as happy as he has made me, but I’m not sure that’s even possible.

  23. maia says...

    It’s incredible how, when you highlight people’s qualities, they’ll feel empowered and show even better parts of themselves, like in the comments today, that I all read and loved!
    At CoJ, you remind me of one of my grand-mother, who (with my grand-father) acted in a way that really played a part that we all, in the family (four generations now), globally get along very well and are very happy when we come together again.
    She’s very happy that we get along, always let us know of the little things that happened to one another, and she “fits in her age”, if we can say that. Always seemed to go with the flow with getting older and years passing by.
    I also really like (and need) when you voice about social, serious issues, in a “light” way like with the Clare Lyons interview or in a more direct way like with Charlottesville.
    Thank you and keep up the good work!

  24. Marion says...

    I always read religiously all the comments on parenting posts. So many usefull ideas!

  25. Lucie says...

    Great comments. I absolutely agree with just-in case-dress. I travel a lot, but mainly hiking somewhere in mountains and still – almost always I was happy to bring one dress or pretty skirt at least.

  26. charlotte says...

    do you think it’s possible to find out from which countries/cities your readers are and let them connect face-to-face? no idea how, but i would find it so lovely to meet the cupofjo-community in my own city!

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      we have been thinking about how we might be able to do this! please stay tuned, charlotte :)

    • I’ll host the meet-up in Ireland and we’ll Skype in 😀

    • Laura says...

      Yes! Great idea, Charlotte.

      I’m happy to host in Asheville, NC!

    • Helen says...

      I’m in Bangkok and would love to meet other gals living here :)

    • Megan says...

      Yes, this!!

    • Alice says...

      Yes to this!
      Was so jealous of the NY reader meet up. Seems like loads of your readers live internationally (Scotland, anyone?!) so that could be really interesting!

    • I’m in Ireland too Maria, so will start planning my outfit! ;)

    • Amanda says...

      YES! I would love to meet other Cup of Jo readers in Toronto! :)

    • Chloe says...

      I’m in Scotland too Alice!

  27. Haha, I love all of them. Especially the ones from Advice to myself and the one with the lovely Dad who gave advice to look for sweet interactions. So so nice. I think I will always remember that from now on! :)
    Have a nice day!! :)
    Jana http://janalueneberg.com

  28. I remember reading so many of these! I kind of mentally bookmark which posts of yours had some of the most uplifting comments and frequent them whenever I need a little pick me up. It’s so nice knowing this community exists, and thank you for creating it! To echo some others here, this is one of the few sites that I actually read/look forward to the comments section, a rare thing in itself!

  29. Kristina E. says...

    Thank you! These comments just brought a smile to my face, and maybe a tear to my eye, in the midst of a challenging day. And yes we are, collectively, Oprah.

  30. Lara says...

    Posts like this make me remember how shocking and amazing it is that we ” hangout” daily in the same blog in the last 10 years or more and feel at home, among friends and happier every time I leave it.

    Joanna, we should have an annual readers get together! In NY and/or on the same day in others city, like São Paulo – where I am :)

    I would love to meet this group, this team of women and Oprah’s

  31. These are really good comments. I love reading them. It is always good to know that there are so many people who love your writing and appreciate your thoughts.

  32. Caitlin McGuire says...

    Thank you for ALL of these comments, but particularly the one about phoning your grandmother. Mine is 97, and while we do spend lots of time together, it’s usually in the company of my one year-old son, resulting in a joyous but distracted visit. I’ve just called her and arranged for a special dinner date tonight – just the two of us. Picking her up at 7 :)

    • Summer says...

      I just had a date with my 96 year old Grandma this past Sunday. I had to tell my kids that I was going to the grocery store, so that I could visit her alone! We were able to talk for 3 hours w/o any interruptions! It was awesome :) Enjoy your ‘date’!

    • Arianna says...

      Love this! You are a wonderful granddaughter.

    • june2 says...

      very cool !

  33. Sam says...

    My husband knows well the infamous “Jo” as “my favorite blogger” and the rich, vibrant comments section weaved into my everyday conversations.

    • Gen says...

      Same. I keep thinking he doesn’t remember so I re-explain it before I bring something up, and he’s like, yeah, I got it, Cup of Jo.

  34. Nicole says...

    Just wanted to say thank you for linking to the ‘Guide to Heartbreak’ post – it was helpful to me today.

  35. Heather says...

    Thank you! One of my favorite parts of Cup of Jo is reading the comments, so this was a treat. It’s nice to know that you as authors read and appreciate them too, even with everything else you have going on running this business.

  36. Megan says...

    Love these as much as I love any Cup of Jo post! However, I still enjoy driving with Vanilla Ice blasting (who cares if I look like an asshole – maybe I am some of the time…). And I love noticing the beautiful kind things people do for others, makes me cry regularly.
    Life is a beautiful thing!!!

  37. Lisa says...

    6. Spend time with your grandmother. You’re going to miss her more than you can imagine.

    Jill, you’re insight is beautiful!

  38. CoCo says...

    Really needed to hear the reader comment below. Recently went on a date with a guy I had really connected with online for several weeks. We had intense chemistry and the best talks but after date two he ghosted. A week later he came back and said that he was attracted to me but not “enough”. Made me feel like a hideous beast. That comment made me remember that the right guy will come along and not care that I am a size 10.

    “Something I once read really shifted my feelings about appearance. The writer asked us to think about the people in our lives that we deeply love. What do they look like? Are they models? Thin? Perfect? I began to think of some of my dear friends in their 80’s, wrinkled and grey. My brother, who is insanely tall, hairy, with a funny underbite. I realized I don’t love them because of their looks. I love them because of who they are, their beautiful hearts, their generosity and loyalty. My thinking shifted about my own looks and I realized the people who love me most feel that way. The fact that the sun-spot on my cheek is getting bigger or that my neck is getting saggy in my forties has nothing to do with it. I have to love myself for the same reasons.” — Twlya

    • Laura says...

      The right guy will love that you’re a size 10.

    • Andrea says...

      I would LOVE to be a size 10! LOL!

      It hurts, though, to have someone you had hopes for dash those hopes. Here’s hoping someone better is around the corner!

    • Amanda says...

      Ah, Coco, I had such a similar experience! It took me so long to look at what was wrong with the way he was thinking, and instead I was so hard on myself. Your gorgeous girl! And that guy will come that recognizes it!

  39. Shannon says...

    This is the only blog that I actually read the comments. Really smart and funny writers and commenters. Love you guys!

  40. KS says...

    I am going to save the first comment by Marriana on slow parenting and read it Every Single Day for rest of my life. It is everything!!!

    • KS says...

      *Marianna, apologies for spelling it wrong.

  41. Amanda says...

    The BEST! Thank you!

  42. Laura says...

    I tried to “like” several of these comments, as if this were facebook or the gram. I think that’s a good sign? Also a possible sign of sleep deprivation?

  43. Alex says...

    I love this post!! Can you do more like this? :)

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      for sure!

  44. Anne says...

    I love this! I too have saved some reader comments and emailed them to myself; they’re that good. Of course, then we get spoiled and think we can comments on basically anywhere else on the internet, which is the pits of hell.

    This has been my favorite blog for so long (I’ll send articles to my bff and she’s like, “Is this the saaaame Jo from 8 years ago?” Uh, yeah.). I have always been 100% sure about not having children, but I gotta say, your blog and the comments (and maybe mother nature?) have really made me question it. Everyone, especially Jo, make parenting seem manageable (and not a complete nightmare :P). Not that anything is too sugarcoated, it just seems…real. Related: I still want your wonderful mother to do a guest piece every once and awhile. :)

    • Sarah J says...

      I do this too! A Cup Of Joe is my go-to suggestion anytime my friends are entering a new season of life or self discovery- and it has been since i first began reading it in 2009!

    • Anne says...

      Yes, Sarah! When someone’s telling me about an issue, I’m like, “Oh! There’s a CupofJo for that!” It’s our generation’s cure-all!

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      awww this makes my day — thank you, this means so much :) :) :)

    • Nicole says...

      I couldn’t agree more. Going on 10 years of following this blog and I have even printed some of my favorite posts and stored them for ease of future reference. (ex: Trader Joes Hacks). Wish I had a Cup of Jo anthology ;)

    • Lauren says...

      Yes, yes, yes to all of this! I couldn’t agree more. Cup of Jo is like my calm, steadfast friend who not only gives the best advice, but has fantastic suggestions! I turned to her baby registry guide when I was pregnant and often re-read the parenting posts (among all the others!) to inspire, entertain, and uplift me.

  45. Lais Cobra says...

    This is the best! My eyes water everytime I read these beatiful and funny advices. Its so nice to be a part of it. Thank you, girls! <3

  46. Amanda Blair says...

    I love this post. I adore all the content you all create here on Cup of Jo but, the comments are really special. Everyone is so sweet and helpful and vulnerable. It always makes me feel less alone reading what everyone has to say. Love this blog and all its readers! Joanna, this blog was the first I ever read! I found you through you’re old column on Glamour.com and found my way here and I’ve never looked back. <3

    • “Everyone is so sweet and helpful and vulnerable. It always makes me feel less alone […]” <<< Totally agree Amanda. Totally.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      oh my gosh, these comments are making me cry! xoxooxox

  47. Heidi says...

    This has got to be one of my favorite posts of all time. I’ve been a Cup of Jo reader for a long time now… I remember finding it when I was lonely and living in a new town. I almost always check the comments section because the readers have so much great insight. Even if it’s a comment that disagrees with the post, it is always respectful and constructive, wanting to understand and not criticize. The comments on books and easy recipes or grocery/Trader Joe’s go-tos are GOLDEN and I look forward to them! Thank you, Cup of Jo Team!

  48. Em says...

    I love this list! Also, giggling at the comment about the vacation dress. Without an oxford comma, it sounds like she spend the night “dancing under a full moon AND a cute boy from England.” Oh my… :P

  49. Anne C Mallin says...

    This is my absolute favorite post of yours. Thank you.

  50. Emily says...

    This was great. I think you should make this post a regular. Say, every three to six months. A round up of some of your favorite reader comments! Some are so good, they need a second time around.

    • Agreed!

    • Jenn P says...

      AGREED!

  51. Sonja says...

    This is so sweet. I hope this is a post that happens again, perhaps quarterly. Will give us time to collect the little bits of wisdom and enchantment in our lives and pass them along.

  52. Lucy says...

    I love, love, love this post! The comments are often my favourite part of your posts, and I love when you share a couple of each week! Maybe you could do a monthly post like this??

  53. Katie says...

    Thank you. I love this post – it helps me fully realize what an extraordinary community of women can be discovered behind what sometimes feels like secret, stolen moments behind my screen, while reading your blog. It’s not that I’m escaping my real world for phone time, I’m actually stepping into a broader world for insight that can better myself and family. I appreciate it. (From a long-time reader, and first-time commenter.)

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      that means a lot, katie, thank you for saying so. :)

  54. Absolutely love this because they are true! Definitely needed this laugh today, thank you!

  55. Lily says...

    Love all of this, love this blog.

  56. Caitlin says...

    I love the comments part of this blog! My sister and I have been reading this blog for many years and I can’t tell you how many times a week we text, email, or call and say “did you read cup of jo today? You have to read the comments!”….I honestly feels like free therapy to us!

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      oh that is so sweet, makes my day, caitlin :)

    • Brittany says...

      This is Caitlin’s sister here, and she speaks the truth! As a new mom, I still think about some of the comments readers made on the work/life balance posts. Usually, the comments section of a blog (or frankly, anything on the internet) is a place to stay far away from, very far away. You guys are single-handedly changing that stigma with the awesome content and work you do day-in and day-out. Cup of Jo comments are diamonds in the rough.

  57. Bailey says...

    I use the name “CupofJo” in conversation as if she were a close friend (she being all you lovely bodies who make and contribute and comment on this space). Conversations with my partner often start: “Today, CupofJo…” or “CupofJo said…” I used to subscribe to dozens and dozens of lifestyle blogs and would read hundreds of posts weekly in my RSS feed. But they mostly made me feel bored, angry, judged, unsuccessful, unhopeful. Now I subscribe to just two blogs, because CupofJo is the most down-to-earth big blog out there. One close friendship far outweighs a dozen acquaintances.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      bailey, that means so much to me. i just sent this comment to our team and that made us all so happy. xoxoxo “One close friendship far outweighs a dozen acquaintances.” = love that. xoxoxo

    • Kristen says...

      Beautifully put Bailey, and it echoes my relationship with Cup of Jo too. I am often referencing blog posts to friends, and will often go through the links on Friday’s “have a great weekend” post with my boyfriend to give us some new things to read and look at. I am in my 40’s and used to read many blogs, but now I religiously read two, and Cup of Jo is favourite out of the two. I love and rely on reader comments. They always make me not feel so alone in the world. xo

    • Lara says...

      I feel the same way! I can’t tell how many stories I start with “I read on Cup of Jo” that…and how I immediately assume it was here I read or learned something interesting and cannot for the life in me, remember who told me. It was you guys! :)

    • Natalie says...

      I do the exact same thing! I bring up something or another that “Cupofjo” said” literally every day! My whole family knows about the time you responded to one of my comments and that half my belongings I have because you suggested I buy them :)

  58. Elizabeth says...

    What a wonderful post!

  59. Anna says...

    Love all the comments about spending time with grandparents. My Oma is in a nursing home in Australia and I am living in China with my little family. She has dementia but lights up like a Christmas tree whenever I bring my kids to see her on our trips back . Oma adores Julie Andrews so we often sit and sing songs from The Sound of Music with her. My eleven year old son is always hugely embarrassed by this but my three year old daughter loves it as does Oma…and me!

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      oh my gosh, that is such a wonderful scene to picture! you sound really lovely, anna.

    • Anna says...

      I’m an Anna with an Oma too :). I lost my beloved Oma years ago, but now my mom is Oma to my kids and they adore her.

  60. These comments are awesome. I love reading through the various comments after reading each post; what a fun idea to highlight your favorite ones!

  61. C says...

    Ari’s comment on noticing the sweet interactions of strangers around you reminded me so much of this lovely scene in About Time. I could watch this movie every day, it’s such a comfort to me whenever I’m feeling sad or dealing with anxiety.

    (note: this scene is towards the end of the movie so if you haven’t seen it yet you might want to avoid it even though there aren’t any outright spoilers in this clip!)
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RxlJ2TdYPo

    • Kieran Gabel🌺 says...

      Thank you for reminding me how good that movie was. Loved the clip.

    • Dee says...

      I love that movie too and I rarely watch movies (other than holiday ones or animated movies with my daughter) over and over.

    • Lucy says...

      I LOVE About Time, I bought it on DVD which is a bit unusual in the day and age of netflix! You are so right, it is such a comfort. The chemistry between all the characters is incredible, and I am dying to go to Cornwall.

    • Sonja says...

      I love that movie. As someone who tries to live life too quickly it’s a sweet reminder to slow down and watch my son play, soak up printed words on crisp pages, enjoy the warmth of the cup of coffee in my hand, relish the minty zip of cold air pulled through freshly brushed teeth.

      And celebrity crush: Domhnall Gleeson forever. I’m still rooting for him in Brooklyn.

    • I love this movie!

    • Katharina says...

      I do love that movie, too. Thank you for reminding me. Because it might just be what I need today. Gotta find the box with the DVDs.

    • Cat says...

      I love this movie too (was just sick recently and it was my immediate choice for a movie to make me feel better!) and and I love that final scene. There is something extraordinary in our ordinary interactions. Not every act of love or kindness is a big gesture; sometimes it’s just giving someone a smile at the end of a weary day or holding the door for someone whose hands are full. Plus I adore the relationships in About Time and feel like they are real people I might know.

    • Anon says...

      Such a sweet reminder to rewatch this clip at the beginning of a (formerly, to me) nothing-special-kind-of-Wednesday. But I kissed my husband this morning and got to wear my favorite fall wrap to work because the weather is just crisp enough – maybe not sure a nothing special kind of Wednesday after all. Thank you!

    • I love that movie so much. You’re right- it is such a comfort. My husband and I both feel the need to re-watch it regularly to remind us that it is the seemingly small and mundane moments that make a beautiful life. Makes me want to pull out my DVD of it tonight and have a happy-cry fest!

    • Thank you for this!! I watched this movie 3 years ago when I was 8 months pregnant and though I loved it, I could NOT stop crying towards the end and actually cried for an hour after it was over, too. Pregnancy hormones!!! I really want to re-watch it with fresh eyes :)

    • Kay says...

      Best movie ever. <3

    • Char says...

      I love that movie!

    • Laura says...

      such a great film. i thought it was very underrated, but loved to read so many other commenters liking it also.

    • Katie says...

      How have I have never even heard of or seen this movie?! Now I’m kind of glad I missed it so I have it to look forward to!

    • Amy P says...

      Yes! I stumbled across About Time on Netflix a while back and thought why not, I can always switch if it’s not great. I LOVED it! One of my favourites in a very long time. If any one has any similar suggestions – I’m all ears!

    • C says...

      Wow! I just came back and saw all these replies. It makes me so happy to see so many other people who love About Time and might have spent their Wednesday night re-watching it! Such a lovely feeling to think about all the strangers you share a favorite movie with.

  62. Leah says...

    Love love love. And the thing the grandmother does with the sitting in the room while the grandson plays video games… I do that with my 15 year old son. The dog and I go up there, get on his bed and just chill and watch and listen to him. He’ll talk or not, but we’re there. And after a while, he usually comes over for a snuggle with us and a few words. It helps me feel close to him and I think it helps him know I’m still there for him if he needs me. Thank you Cup of Jo, for creating this community of warm readers who share with each other.

  63. Sheila says...

    Thank you Twyla with the genius, wise reminder on how to look at our bodies!

    • Jessa says...

      I loved her comment too!

  64. Ashley says...

    One of my favorite things about this blog is feeling like I belong to a community.. a community that makes me feel there are others who are like me and those who are different than me that I get to learn from. This post gave me all the feels!

  65. Vasanthi Naidu says...

    ❤️❤️❤️

  66. Melissa says...

    I honestly have numerous cup of jo posts bookmarked only for the comments (sorry Jo) – there are a treasure trove of information! Favorite books, easy meals, kid presents and so many more. Thanks dear reader friends.

  67. Jeannie says...

    I love the comments section! As a long-time (9+ yrs) reader, they’re like a fundamental extension of the post itself. When I see a post’s title previewed in my reader (e.g. “How to pack for a trip” or “Funny family vacation stories”), I immediately also can’t wait to see what fellow readers contribute below! I, too, have either shed tears from heart swelling tales and cried many tears of laughter over fellow readers’ stories. This blog is very special and the overall tone/voice has never wavered. Thanks Joanna + team ;-)

  68. Laugh so hard on the Advice to Younger Self…Vanilla Ice. hahaha!
    And reading this blog post makes me feel like we have more ‘hope’ than I have been feeling. There are all these smart, kind, funny people are in the world…living…maybe we can make ‘the world a better’ place.

  69. Jo says...

    Whenever I am telling a friend about Cup of Jo, I always describe it as the kindest place on the internet. Your content is insightful, funny and widespread, but the real magic is in the way you bring out the best in your readers. Well done, team!

    • Ellen says...

      Kindest. Yes. Thank you Cup of Jo staff and community

  70. Sofia says...

    “Are our readers… Oprah?”!! that’s too funny :D

  71. Rebecca says...

    Oh god, reading ‘Spend time with your grandmother. You’re going to miss her more than you can imagine.’ almost made me burst into tears at my desk. My grandma is sick and I’ve been trying to spend as much time as possible with her but the last few times I’ve been over it’s felt kind of stilted and awkward, which I hate. I know she’s just feeling so so sick and awful and it’s hard to keep up conversation. Any tips?

    • Teree says...

      My thought? Just…be with her. I suspect that she doesn’t need you to entertain her. Just love her by being there to hold her hand.
      When my mom was dying, she didn’t want to be treated as such; who would? Everyone just wants to be who they are, no matter what their age or condition.
      Sending you hugs.

    • Amy says...

      I was flying in to California for work and was hoping to see some family (including Grandpa) however he ended up going for emergency surgery. I went to visit him in the hospital and he was grumpy old man that just wanted to go home. It was useless talking to him so instead I just massaged his hands and head. My grandpa became a bubbly baby. I think that was one of my favorite moments with gramps :)

    • Suzie says...

      I don’t think the conversation matters as much as you just being there. When my grandma was sick in her last days, I spent some time in the hospital just being by her side. She didn’t always feel like talking so sometimes we were watching TV or other family members were there. Maybe you can watch TV together, knit together (or some activity she likes), or you can have a mostly one sided conversation where you tell her about all the wonderful times that you spent together and she can just listen.

    • brianna says...

      Just be there. I wasn’t with my grandfather right before he passed away, but the last time I saw him, he was just thrilled to know I was there.

    • Kelly says...

      This one got to me too. As someone who was so close to my grandmother, it was so difficult when it came to be the end of her life. As she was dying, I just sat with her, rubbed her back with lotion, held her hand, read to her. Even though she didn’t have the strength to talk, I knew she loved and appreciated having me there. Just having you there might mean the world to her.

      I miss her so much. Thankfully, both of my girls have her chin and cheeks and dimple and smile. My mom has her work ethic, generosity and warmth. The best parts of my grandma live on through others so I am reminded of her daily.

    • Patti says...

      Bring a book and a read aloud! You both will appreciate the structure. Not to mention chatting over plot points and thavubg the next chapter to look forward to. Xo

    • Kirstin says...

      I wonder if you could just tell her your favourite memories, and describe all the lollies she let you have, or the barbie dolls she bought even though your mother did not approve, or places you went… and stay for less time. Just pop in, share a story and say you will be back. She loves you.

    • Sonja says...

      When my great aunt was very sick we went to visit and after a long trip to get there I suddenly didn’t know what to do. There were books to read and music to be played but ultimately I sat there and told her all of the ways in which she’d enchanted me as a child. How she was a ruthless card player with graceful beauty and a tinkling laugh. I told her how much I loved her sons who at 10+ years older were so kind to me when I was small spending hours with me and Where’s Waldo. And most importantly I told her how she’d enchanted me as an adult. At my cousins’ wedding she and the bride’s father sang a duet of Johnny Cash’s Burning Ring of Fire and ended the whole thing with kazoos. So my sisters and I sang a bit to her – it was the last and sweetest smile from my aunt to me.
      It’s so tough – wishing you fortitude and love.

    • Rebecca says...

      Oh, I feel you: that one hit me too. I was so close to my Grandma and I was a long way away. I used to dread calling her despite always having loved our chats, because I could hear how unwell she was, and that she was dying. Then one day my uncle was chatting to me as he took the phone to her and he said, “she just lights up when you call.” Knowing they made her so happy made those calls so much easier.

      As to what to do. I remember sitting in the hospital when I went up to be with her at the end, and reading poetry to her. She was drifting in and out of paying attention so she couldn’t have followed a story, but she loved poetry and she enjoyed it so much. I remember her listening to one poem and saying, “I don’t know that one. Write down who it’s by so I can find more of theirs.” We brought her home for her last days the next day so she didn’t, but it was such a lovely moment and it made me remember that my darling, curious grandma was still there.

    • Ellen says...

      My Nana was not conscious the last time I saw her, but I held her hand and hummed her favourite song and she roused for long enough to put her hand on my shoulder and stare so intensely into my eyes with a look of love that only a Mother of 7, Grandmother of 19 and Great Grandmother of 6 could give. I will never forget it.

      Just being there provides more comfort than you’d imagine. Thinking of you x

    • Jane says...

      When my Nan was dying, and could no longer speak, we played songs with some mini portable speakers and talked about what or who they made us think of. Things like ‘Oh I remember Dad loved this song but would sing the wrong lyrics’, ‘I remember Aunty X playing this one on a 45 record.’ It filled the silence and helped us feel like all our family were there with her when some of them couldn’t be there in person.

    • Michelle R says...

      I agree, just being there is important. But if you do feel that the quiet is a bit stifling, maybe you could put on some of her favorite music in the background? I bet she would love that!

    • Katie says...

      My grandma’s are both in their 90s and nearing the end and I’m tearing up writing this, but some ways we’ve been together recently:

      – Looking through old family photos together (her vision is bad, so I actually quick snapped pics with my phone and viewed them full screen on a laptop) brought up stories none of us had ever heard from when she was a girl, when she and my grandpa first married, etc.
      – Listening to old music and just holding her hand.
      – Reading cards to her aloud.
      – She isn’t always up for talking, so I just talked about memories at her house, how we cousins all love to get together, how she provided such a welcoming space for family, how kind and generous her kids and grandkids are.
      – Once when she had a period of agitated delirium, I sat by her bed, held her hand, stroked her forehead, and told her what a wonderful grandma she had been. I don’t think she caught many words, but she was noticeably soothed.

      I am sending you love, peace, and fortitude.

    • Jamie says...

      This one is so true. For me it was my grandpa. Him and his wife lived in TX over the winter when he passed away from an unfortunate accident. I did talk to him while he was in the hospital and I’ll never forget our last conversation while I was sitting in my cube at work bawling. Till this day I still pretend he’s just in TX hanging out (that was 7yrs ago). Now my daughter holds his name as her middle name: George.

    • Ellie says...

      There are so many good comments here, and you will know which ones are right for you and your grandmother. Foot rubs or hand rubs are probably welcome by many people. I know my elderly mother loves it when one of us gives her a head-rub. Just chat with your grandmother about what you did that day, or what your children are up to, or something mundane like the weather. When my mother-in-law was dying, my husband spent an afternoon with her just remembering things from his childhood. They talked and laughed, and I know the time together meant the world to both of them. When my elderly dad was bedridden and dying, he had some dementia and I know that “awkward” feeling. Ultimately, I found that reading to him was a wonderful activity. He always read Winnie the Pooh to me when I was little, and I read Pooh poetry to him. “Christopher Robin had sneezles and wheezles/ they bundled him into his bed….” Dad would light up and sometimes even join in. The most important thing is that you are there with her.

    • Louise says...

      Read the old “winnie the pooh” book out loud to her. It’s such a comforting book. I read it to my dying mom in the hospital (who was an extreme intellectual) and we laughed at how honestly funny and sweet the book is. It’s a great common and easy book to read aloud too and very easy to stop/start. We both laughed out loud to the silly old bear.

    • Rebecca says...

      Oh my goodness, all these wonderful, amazing, thoughtful responses! Now I’m really crying at my desk. Thank you everyone xx

  72. Lindsay says...

    Thank you, thank you, thank you for this great post :)

  73. Lily says...

    I love reading the comments here- have been a COJ reader for 6 years now, and becoming a mom in January- I have to say I have filed many comments away in my head (and on my phone!) and thought about and referenced them later for all kinds of life events- career, marriage, and now while I’m pregnant and for the arrival of our son! So grateful for the collective wisdom and humanity of your readers!

  74. Kari says...

    This is such a wonderful feature, please make it a regular thing! What a wise, hilarious, and inspiring audience of women you have, Joanna and team!

  75. Laura says...

    i didn’t even know about the tooth fairy for a while! my parents are from chihuahua and we had el ratón coming over to our house instead of the tooth fairy. not sure why i thought it was so magical that a mouse traded all my teeth for some money. also not sure why i never questioned that i had el ratón while all my american friends/cartoons had the tooth fairy.

    my mom still tells the story about how when i was a kid i had a silver crown on one of my back teeth, but when it fell out, i didn’t set it out for el ratón right away. i was saving it until a rainy day when i needed some money (haha), and i thought a silver crown would be worth more.

    • Jeannie says...

      Oh my GOSh I love your story. A LITTLE MOUSE (to me, as a huge all-animal lover) is WAY more cool than a fairy LOL! Also lol to your saving the silver crown.

    • Jenn says...

      My friend left a note for el raton as a five year old that read, “pinche raton, donde esta mi dos pesos” 🤣

    • MB says...

      El ratoncito Pérez! He left me a buck–and despite the fact that I watched a ton of American TV and knew about the tooth fairy, I never ever wondered why it wasn’t a fairy but a mouse that took my teeth!

  76. Lea says...

    What a lovely idea for a post

  77. Steph says...

    The recent one about the 90 yr old man with his cheese cocktail and ice cream hours was a big one too!

    • Charlotte K says...

      Oh Yeah!!

    • Paula says...

      Absolutely! It completely moved me and inspired me to have a ritual like that when I get older.

  78. jac says...

    Yeah! I love these. I was so sad to miss the reader party in New York. Have one in California soon, please! <3

    • Bonnie says...

      Yes…Please come to the Bay Area!

    • Faith says...

      I second that! Please come to the Bay Area. :)

  79. Kristen says...

    “6. Spend time with your grandmother. You’re going to miss her more than you can imagine.”

    Made me choke up! Next week is the 9-year anniversary of my Grammie passing. I adored her! I’ve always missed her, but somehow now that I’m in my 30’s, I spend so much time thinking about how remarkable of a person she was, and how I wish I could spend time getting to know her as a woman.

    • Bonnie Aase says...

      I so loved my grandma too. Shes been gone 30 years now. She died when I was 19. But we got a four generation picture of her, my mom, my son and myself. I still have the ball she knitted for me. Memories are wonderful to look back on when sitting alone.

    • My Nana Gloria has been gone for 15 years, and I still talk to her.

  80. I love this roundup! I always know that the Cup of Jo comment section is a goldmine, but because there are so many comments, I don’t usually read them. I would love to see this featured section happen again in this long form (instead of/in addition the two that get highlighted per week). Smart ladies!

  81. K Seiler says...

    On relationships sections reminded me of this:
    One day I was having a terrible time and had just come back from picking up a towed car, in which I didn’t have the money to pay for. I called my mom sobbing, in a foreign city, and broke. In the midst of sobs, she asked me to open up the notes section of my phone and we made a list of our favorite things. Including blueberries, white squirrels, campfires, wine, beatboxing on car trips, hats, snuggles and counting butterflies. Later that night, I went back to reference it when I was feeling anxious and I found a list of the most important people in my life. I had written down what attributes in my friends and family drew me to them, why I’d admired them and most importantly, what about them continued to inspire me year after year.

    Now, next to my list of favorite things, I have my list of most inspiring people in my life. Whenever life (or work) starts to get me down, I open up my notes section and I receive a little bit of inspiration. The best part: my phone is always with me. It’s like having inspiration in my pocket or purse all the time.

    • Isabelle says...

      LOVE it!

  82. Emma says...

    One of my comments was once featured in the Friday round-up post and I admit that it gave me such a thrill and made my day! I love reading the comments here, thanks for being great ya’ll.

    • Heidi says...

      Same here! Didn’t it feel like such an honor?

  83. Laura says...

    I wish I could know how many of your readers are actually men!

    • Wendy says...

      That was my thought, too, when I read, “this smart, funny community of women”!

  84. kirstin says...

    Great selection – and yes, I do miss my grandmother more than I ever expected. How wise is Jill on that one!

  85. Meg says...

    More just like this!

  86. Eeeeek! That’s my comment in the career section! What an honor to be highlighted here. Thank you.

  87. Cara says...

    FYI – The What Not To Bring On Vacation link seems to be broken (or not there).

    • Stella Blackmon says...

      Thank you, Cara! Just updated.

  88. Lauren O says...

    Agree, the content is great, but the comments are where the magic happens for me. It honestly gives me hope for humanity that the commenters on this blog, many of whom are raising the next generation of tiny humans, are so empathetic, open minded and kind.

    • Amanda says...

      So true. There are so many kind hearts here. Thank you.

  89. LaurenB says...

    I have a hard rule to NEVER read the comments….whenever I break it, I am always disappointed by humanity. My only exception is for Cup of Jo. I love this little community of readers (and our fearless writers/editors!)

    • G says...

      ME TOO

    • YES!!! I came here to say this too, it’s the one place the comments section isn’t terrifying, lol!

    • Carrie says...

      That’s a good rule that I need to implement for myself and the preservation of my sanity.

    • Laura says...

      yeeeesss. even on the more rare occasion when it’s a comment I disagree with, it’s such a different tone than most comment sections. plus, i find it more interesting to learn about opposing opinions here rather than trolling ones I find on other platforms.

  90. Devin says...

    Well now I’m laughing and crying at my desk and wiping off sneaky tears escaping from my eyes!

    :’)

    • Nataly says...

      Same here! I was not expecting the tears, but turns out my heart really needed to hear some of these wise words!

  91. LG says...

    The comments are my favorite part of Cup of Jo! It’s rare to find an uplifting and insightful comment section anywhere on the web. Love this little online community of people who encourage one another.