I’ve always had co-ed groups of friends — guys and girls hanging out, watching movies, driving to Taco Bell. But, recently, I’ve found myself drawn to women-only hang outs. Do you feel the same?
In the newsletter Dolly Mail, London-based writer Violet Hudson made the case for lady-only gatherings. “There are covens all over this city,” she says. “The libations we make are spilled red wine. The spells we cast are conversation. And the potions we brew are pasta or roast chicken. The Wiccan religion that we all practice is simple: girls-only hang outs.”
“Let me be clear,” writes Hudson. “I’m not talking about a small group of, say, school or university friends meeting for a catch-up… What’s new is that women are choosing to exclude men when previously we would have been scrabbling to invite them” — say, at dinner parties or weekends away.
This year, for me, I’ve really loved hanging with just ladies: My beloved articles club has female friends only. I’ve been to all-ladies potluck dinners. Recently, I was itching to meet more women in my neighborhood, so I invited over mothers from school that I didn’t know well, and it was really fun.
One of the nicest parts of hanging out with women is that you can talk about everything and feel understood. “You probably wouldn’t start discussing your menstrual cycle or childbirth with a group of men,” writes Hudson. At articles club, for example, we talk about books, politics, children, career ups and downs, irrational fears, marriage, sex, aging parents, fake eyelashes — whatever pops into our minds is fair game and well received.
And the concept of female groups isn’t only behind closed doors. The beauty brand Glossier bases their company on the idea of a “girl gang.” The Wing is a new work and social space for women-only in New York City. Instagram has hilarious posts about female friendship, and group texts were basically invented for funny conversations among women.
A recent evening with friends.
Do you gravitate toward all-female hangs, or do you have more co-ed gatherings? What kinds of things do you usually do with friends — movies, dinners, walks? I’d love to hear… (Another post coming this month: Introvert Stella on making friends as an adult. Let us know if there are other friendship topics you’d like to see covered!)
(Top wallpaper by Elizabeth Graeber.)