Have a Relaxing Weekend.

I love how you wrote rape survivor instead of victim. I hope she knows and feels that and realizes what an incredibly strong and inspiring person she is to so many. Thank you for sharing! xo

People may disagree with what I’m about to say: but I feel strongly that things will only change when MEN begin to read these stories and shed tears. When they begin to shed tears for their sisters, for their mothers, for their daughters. We can’t do it alone. My husband paid a different kind of attention to all of this when I read the victim’s letter out loud to him. All he could say was: “holy crap. If this was my daughter…” And he could not even finish the sentence. We need to teach our husbands, brothers and sons. I feel strongly that this is a huge piece of this puzzle.

Friday links on point!!

omg, I’ve been looking forward to cleaning out my closet all week when my husband takes my toddler to swim class this weekend. You’re definitely not the only one and glad to hear I’m not either!

I really like the co-incidence post :)

Shruthi
http://nyambura.co

Perfect weekend links! Thanks Joanna ❤️

I look forward to your Friday posts every week. They are warm, funny, and thoughtful. Thank you. And even more, thank you, thank you for posting the open letter.

That letter is so important to read. I would argue that Brock Turner’s father’s letter is almost as important to read – to highlight the extremity of the rape culture we are currently living in. That educated and privileged men can think they have the right to 20 minutes (ANY minutes) of a woman’s body without her consent, and ACTUALLY believe that Brock’s sentence was ‘steep’. It is so, so terrifying and we need to do a better job.

This letter to Brock’s father, from another father is brilliant: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/john-pavlovitz/to-brock-turners-father-from-another-father_b_10339418.html

The best part is when he acknowledges that it must be a terrible reality to learn that his son is a rapist – but it doesn’t change the fact that his son is in fact, a rapist. This is why we need to TEACH our children about consent. We explicitly teach girls in very direct language to not drink too much, to not let their glass out of their sight, to not wear things too revealing, to know bullshit cliches like ‘boy’s only want one thing’ and ‘boys will be boys’. We have an absolute responsibility as parents of boys to explicitly teach them in very direct language that they do not have a right to ANY woman’s body. They may be granted temporary/limited access to a woman’s body, just like they may grant someone access to their own body; and this is only okay when they are 100% sure they have ongoing consent. We need to teach them that if they don’t have consent (and be explicit like, when a woman is incapacitated) this is RAPE. This may sound extreme, or like it should be common sense, but read Brock’s father’s letter or look at the stats – THIS is what common sense looks like in our rape culture. And it is absolutely our responsibility to fix it, because we have failed miserably.

I love your blog and love it even more so for you using your platform to share the recent rape victim’s story. Thank you.

Such a powerful letter. Thank you for sharing with your readers, Joanna. xo

Thank you so much for sharing the Stanford assault survivor’s letter (and Joe Biden’s letter in response), Jo. I have been feeling so sad, defeated, and lost about her story, how her trial was handled, and how the world seems to not be paying attention. Thank you for using your influence to shed light on her story.

This letter broke my heart…

Everyone needs to read the Stanford victim’s statement. I was already angry about the light sentence, and now even more after reading her statement. I’m glad we’re discussing it and so glad you included Biden’s letter too.

Clearing out and organizing drawers is so rewarding! If you haven’t listened yet, you should try out The Minimalist podcast, the guys who run it are pretty awesome and inspiring.

I just read a really fascinating piece about the Marie Kondo crazy and the “privilege of clutter”. Might be good to read before you start your clean out project! http://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2016/03/marie-kondo-and-the-privilege-of-clutter/475266/

Her letter is so wonderful & powerful, but I do think we should be calling him Brock Turner the rapist and the issue the Brock Turner sexual assault. By including Stanford, or as many news outlets have, “former Stanford swimmer rape,” we legitimize him & give him status. She is not a survivor of Stanford rape. She is a survivor of an assault by Brock Turner.

Thank you for posting the victim statement and Biden’s letter. I had read snippets of the statement this week, but was dreading reading it in full, imagining how heartbreaking it would be, but when I saw the post, I knew I needed to do it. We owe it to the victim (to all victims) to read her statement and glean even an ounce of understanding of what she has been through and what she will continue to deal with the rest of her life. We need to move past the discomfort associated with talking about sex, rape and consent and acknowledge that open discourse and education are important elements of changing a culture that sweeps so many of these attacks against women and their bodies under the rug. This woman is incredible and I hope she gains some measure of healing knowing that she has made a profound impact in how our country talks about sexual violence.

So glad you included the Stanford victim’s letter & Biden’s letter – I actually emailed them to the president of the University I work for earlier this week.

And I need to get inspired to clean out my closet! I have too much ‘stuff’. Working to become more of a minimalist :-)

those letters…that woman….her bravery….i am speechless. thank you for including them today.

I’m also cleaning out my closet this weekend, I cannot WAIT. I realized I only wear like, 12 things, max. It’s insane that I probably have hundreds of items of clothing in my closet. WTF!

thanks for sharing these, especially the last two, so important and heart breaking and awe-inspiring.

Another great roundup of links. Always something to learn here. I especially enjoyed the rituals.