How to Stop Yourself From Crying

THANK YOU thank you thank you for sharing this tip on your Instagram this week! I cannot tell you how timely it was. I am an asylum lawyer, and I sometimes have trouble controlling my emotions during client interviews and hearings when my clients are telling the very difficult stories of what they have experienced. My empathy is a tremendous gift in the work that I do but also NOT AT ALL professional when the tears threaten to flow. I have an important hearing tomorrow, and I am so thankful to have this trick up my sleeve! I’ve tried it a few times in the last couple of days, and I am shocked how quickly and well it has worked. Thank you for helping me better represent a vulnerable population of immigrants!

I was just reading an article about the Pixar film Bao, and in that article it links to this article. Even reading about that film has me a blubbering mess. I was so moved by it the first time I saw it that it still evokes a response in me, even if I think too much about it. Anyway, I immediately clicked through and read this article, because I’m always losing control of myself when anything stirs me to tears. AND THIS WORKS! I tried it in the middle of a jag and it stopped the tears immediately. So effectively that it actually made me start laughing! Which felt great. I don’t know if the pinch caused the laughing or the shock at the tears stopping so suddenly but I am very thankful. I hope the pinch will continue to make me laugh. It feels so good. Thank you!

I have needed this tip for the past 20 years. I have a very tender heart and tend to get choked up easily. Even if I want to tell a clerk that she was helpful and did a good job, I tear up and can’t get one word out. It is EMBARRASSING! One time, I saw a crossing guard helping children cross the street and I got all teary eyed. I think I need serious help, but meanwhile I will do the pinch!

Thanks for this tip! I wish I’d known this on Friday last week! For the first time in almost eight years, I nearly teared up in front of a co-worker while we were meeting at my desk. Would have been completely inappropriate, so I said, “I might cry now.” He said, “no, don’t do that!” I promptly turned in my swivel chair and faced the other direction. Then he said he’d come back in 15 minutes and closed the door. I called him five minutes later and said, “It’s cool. Let’s meet.” He apologized for asking the non-work related questions that prompted this, and I apologized back because I should be able to keep it together. Has never happened to me before at work, and I hope never happens again in my lifetime! Not that type of cry anyway!

when i start crying and can’t stop, i take pictures of myself. i always look so melodramatic and pathetic that i’m laughing within seconds.

mary, that’s so interesting!

Oh my goodness- what an interesting trick! When I was going through a really awful breakup, I stopped myself from crying by drinking something cold through a straw. It changes your breathing and you get to sip something delicious. Works every single time for me!

I need a trick to start crying, I haven’t done it in a long time. Too long, I think.

/Avy

http://mymotherfuckedmickjagger.blogspot.com

♥

This is genius! I can’t wait to try it… I’ve had a very difficult year with lots of drama, bad bosses and general cry-inducing events. I even had a customer shout at me until I burst into tears on the shop floor. I cry when I’m angry, when I’m sad, when I really want to punch my husband for doing something stupid.

If stopping my reflexive crying is as easy as this, I owe you quite a bit Joanna!

I’ve never tried it for crying but this tip actually works for a headache too. Your headache will instantly disappear – but only for as long as you pinch the skin…

I’ve never tried this tip but I have great success with clearing my throat and swallowing. Something about the throat clearing disrupts the crying reflex! I am a cry-er too and it can be so inconvenient.

It’s great to read that other women cry as easily as I do. I tear up all time, over happy and sad things, but I only really let myself cry in front of my husband.

Does anyone else get a horrible headache when they try to hold back the tears?

Holy cow I need this! I’ve cried in professional situations a few too many times lately (with grad school mentors) over some major career decisions. It’s so embarrassing, though I must say it’s interesting to see how people respond. One of my “tougher” professors was actually quite sensitive, while my own mentor tried to ask me “Oh is this because of personal problems?” Uuuugh. I see several emotional landmines ahead so I will be putting this to use!

I work in game development and am surrounded by men. When I get super mad, I burst into tears. I’ve had to excuse myself into the bathroom to pull it together. Cannot wait to employ this trick next time that happens!

Oh I hope this works. I cry all the dang time, most often when i really dont want to. I feel like a 7 yr old and it’s very frustrating. Thanks for this!

Oh my goodness! I can’t wait to try this. I cry at everything. What is worse is I also cry when I’m angry! I hate that because I think it makes me look weak! Its hard to try to tell someone off while tears are running down your face. Grr!

Funny you should post this! I was just crying in my work bathroom about an hour ago (nothing to do w. work and I’ll be fine). I will try this tip! Thanks <3

I do math in my head–works every time. Something about using the more logical side of your brain distracts you from the more emotional side. I’ll find numbers in my line of sight–even look at the time–and add, multiply, divide. I’ll give this trick a shot too!

I had a total melt down in front of a former boss. I had just gotten a call from my doctor’s office telling me that I had to come in right away for a second mammogram and I needed to come in as soon as I could. I had to ask my boss if I could leave for part of the day and I just lost it. It all turned out ok, it was a false alarm, but it was so scary and upsetting.

I cry when I experience heightened emotions–which means I practically cry everyday. Happy tears, sad tears, frustrated tears, I-just-saw-the-cutest-thing tears–you get the idea. If this can stop the waterworks, I’ll be so happy, I’ll probably cry! ;)

Poor Kaitlyn could’ve used this on the Bachelor! ;)

I discovered an unusual method to stop myself from crying a couple years ago: multi-digit addition problems. As I’m sitting in the chair across from my boss’s desk, I’ll try to add something like 348 + 792 without paper/pencil. I know it sounds robotic and depressing, but it works anywhere!– sad movies, funerals– any time you’re in public and don’t feel like crying in front of people.

@Hevuva: I think crying at work is ok sometimes and doesn’t undermine your professional credibility unless it’s a regular thing. I’ve cried in front of my boss before (once due to a breakup I was going through when he asked me what was up with me, and once because I felt sad for some people in a tough work situation I was in). Both times he was super sympathetic and understanding. Now, if I cried weekly, I think that would be an issue. I think men and women just express themselves differently a lot of the time. Just like it’s not appropriate for either sex to angrily yell at work often, I don’t think it’s appropriate for either sex to cry at work often. Controlling your emotions is an important part of being professional. I just cried in the bathroom stall today lol… I had a good cry, then composed myself and got on with it. Crying is natural and normal but there is a time and place just like with everything else in life.

I’m such a crier too – it’s unfortunate that we don’t feel we can show our emotions when we feel them but I’m still absolutely in agreement with everyone that it feels completely unprofessional to cry at work.

I too have a boss who is known to fly off the handle (yay fashion industry) with inexplicable cruelty and no advance warning. I’ll be happy to give this trick a try!

I am such a cryer…and always at the most inopportune moments! If this really works it will be so very handy. Subtle enough to deploy in front of people without looking like a lunatic! Love it! :)

What a great tip! I will test it out next time I’m about to cry, that’s just plain genius!

I am in desperate need of guest posters to keep my inspirational Wednesday going, if anyone’s interested: http://charlinehasablog.blogspot.com/2015/02/notetoself-call-for-guest-posts.html

Love, Charline xx

Ahhh, this is great! I’m in school studying to be a marriage and family therapist and one of my professors told us a trick she had learned which is to take big, deep breaths since we tend to hold our breath when we get emotional. I’ve tried it countless times since and it works! I’ll add the pinching as well since it wouldn’t be too noticeable in sessions. Thanks!

In my first job out of college, my manager said something that made me tear up so I dipped into the bathroom. It was totally empty except for the (super awesome!) female CEO who was washing her hands — needless to say I was mortified for her to see me cry. She was insanely kind and said “in my first job on wall street, I cried ALL THE TIME.” It made me feel so much better and appreciate the amazing lady boss running the show at my company. :)

you have no idea how much I needed this! I am an emotional crier – for EVERY emotion. Mad? Cry. Frustrated? cry. Happy? Cry. Sometimes I just cry for no reason at all. and it is always at the WORST times. I really hope this works for me!