Wise Words

Last night, I was a little out of sorts—feeling like a mama bear, bummed about daylight savings and just having an overall generalized anxiety kick, as is my wont. While surfing Pinterest, I came across this quote, and, while it focuses more on beauty, it was a lovely reminder to give yourself a break:

It doesn’t make sense to call ourselves ugly, because we don’t really see ourselves. We don’t watch ourselves sleeping in bed, curled up and silent with chests rising and falling with our own rhythm. We don’t see ourselves reading a book, eyes fluttering and glowing. You don’t see yourself looking at someone with love and care inside your heart. There’s no mirror in your way when you’re laughing and smiling and happiness is leaking out of you. You would know exactly how bright and beautiful you are if you saw yourself in the moments where you are truly yourself.

Beautiful, don’t you think? And so true.

P.S. Another inspiring quote.

(Illustration by Roxanne Daner)

  1. Sundus says...

    Thank you for reminding me of this post. When this was first posted, it was every bit of reassurance I needed after having my son. I gave birth to my daughter just last month, and again find myself floundering in frustration about my postpartum body. This is all the reasoning I needed to be compassionate and patient, and seek my self worth in all the wonderful roles I hold, instead of the shape I am.

  2. Such a beautiful and super refreshing way of looking at yourself. I am so happy that I came across this (thanks so a link via Elise Blaha Cripe’s fabulous weekend links) I think that every child should know this so that it can stop just a slice of the negativity that seeps into our minds as we grow. I for one am so guilty of not having much self love and wish that I could see myself through my fiancés eyes for example. What we could all achieve for a few seconds of that clarity!

  3. Thank you so much for sharing. I’m learning how to love myself after years of self-hatred… and remembering this absolutely helps.

  4. This is beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing.

  5. wow. that was incredibly inspiring. thank you for sharing!


  6. This was really wonderful and so timely. Have we found out yet who may have wrote it?

  7. This post really hit me hard. So many times (especially lately!) I am excessively critical of my body and looks because I don’t think/feel I look the way I should. Yet others see me differently. I am printing this post and keeping it close for a quick reminder that I need to be softer and more kind to myself. Thank you, Joanna.

  8. Definitely needed to hear this today! My skin is breaking out since I’ve gone back on the pill and I just feel hideous (literally had bandaids on my face last night in bed!). Thanks for everything, Jo x

  9. Thank you thank you thank you for posting this. I’ve been beating up on myself for things I’m not doing as well as I would like, and these words are such a lovely reminder to cut it out.

  10. I love that so much! Thank you for sharing :)

  11. Hi Jo, I think I may have left comment before about Relora. I don’t have a vested interest – only that I suffer from anxiety too and I read about it in the Sunday Times magazine a few years ago now. It is totally natural – a plant extract and supplement – so no nasty chemicals or side effects. There are a few producers so you can shop around. It is from the magnolia plant, I think. Anyway, I just thought I’d recommend it again as I have found it transformational, truly. All the best, Charlotte

  12. Thank you for this beautiful reminder, it was needed. We are so hard on ourselves and are our toughest critics too often.

  13. Thank you Joanna, but please think of all of us readers when you’re feeling a little down. You are our cup of JOY!
    Sending a big hug

  14. So beautiful! Thank you Joanna! This really helped me understand some moments when my partner calls me beautiful, and I feel everything but!

  15. Lovely sentiment. I wish more people would actually believe this about themselves as well.

  16. Beautiful.

  17. I so appreciate your honesty. I feel anxious from time to time, too. (I actually had a nightmare about which snow boots to buy for my kids. Omg.) You make me feel more normal and less alone, and thereby less anxious :) Thank you! XO

  18. I remember watching an old video of me and my son when he was a baby. I thought, wow, that woman looks so happy and content. Beautiful even!

  19. What a wonderful quote. Thank you for sharing, a wonderful mindset to share with friends too when they are down on themselves. When I’m frustrated with technology my go to is now pinterest. A few minutes of pretty things and mindful quotes and I feel better.

  20. This really touched me! What a lovely reminder!

  21. I love this post. Seriously it is so nice to realize that not all bloggers feel perfect all the time, and I am not a freak for having anxiety & self-doubt.

    Lovely! xoxo,
    Life in Lavender

  22. “The beauty you see in me is a reflection of you.” – Rumi

    In this way, seeing the beloved is like looking in a mirror.

  23. This is so uplifting! I always look at my sister (even in her weakest moments) and think how lucky someone will be to have her- her laugh, her cry, her beauty inside and out.

    It can be so easy to see the beauty and love and goodness in others, and so hard to see it in yourself sometimes. I’m going to Pin this right now!

  24. this is an excellent quote and so accurate as well. we only really see ourselves in very staged and static situations – looking into the mirror when brushing our teeth, or looking into the mirror in a dressing room, or posing for a selfie.

    we never really get to experience ourselves in movement, and humans in movement are the humans we fall in love with, for their good, their bad, their ugly, and their beautiful.

    rae of love from berlin

  25. aww a big hug to all of you lovely ladies!!!

  26. Feeling very low at the moment…..mommy things combined with bad news about my mommy too. This bought a little year to my eye, it is extremely beautiful!!!!
    Thank you
    Sam xxx

  27. Love this, and it’s a very much needed reminder for me in general but especially after a not-so-nice moment on Monday that is still irking me in which a stranger picked apart my facial flaws (unsolicited, to sell me a beauty product)… I know the people who know, love and appreciate me don’t see the little blemishes or dark circles when they look at me, they just see me. It’s a difficult but important task to look at ourselves with a kind heart, too. And to cut ourselves some slack!

    Thanks for sharing :)

  28. Exactly what I needed to hear right now; I had a hard, hard day yesterday with the rain and the gray. xo

  29. Oh I love this! I will definitely be sharing this :)

    Thank you for posting, Joanna. Hope you’re feeling better today :)


  30. I love that!

  31. Beautiful quote! Thank you for sharing! <3

  32. I’ve been feeling exactly the same way this week, so I’ll try to keep this in mind. It’s a really nice reminder.

  33. I am so lucky to be a cup of Jo reader! Really, how lucky am I? You and your team are so great. Thanks for all the wonderful posts, this one included. xo

  34. thank you!

  35. That’s a wonderful quote! Thanks for sharing – it has brightened up my evening :)

  36. Somehow you always know the words your readers need to hear. Thank you so much for that much needed perspective today.

  37. I need this today. I really really do. Thank you.

  38. What a wonderful quote. A friend said something like that to me recently. My friend is KIND OF A BIG DEAL, and when we’re in public together I sometimes feel like I’m managing friendly advances from people who aren’t interested in getting to know me, but getting closer to her through me, if that makes sense. I shared this with her recently, and she said, “Oh, H, people want to be friends with you all the time. You don’t know what it’s like to be around you and listen to you talk and laugh and tell jokes, and then watch the way you look at your friends with such love and support, and want so badly to be friends with you. I know what it’s like to meet you and want to be friends with you. If you could see yourself, you’d know.” I think it might be the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. I wrote it down so I wouldn’t forget.

  39. So true! And I definitely needed to hear that today. Last night I was feeling down so I scrolled through my husband’s Instagram feed (he’s out of town for work.) to witness how he sees me. It made me feel so much better.

  40. beautiful! really wise words!

  41. I love this so very much. I want to share it with everyone I know.

  42. gina, that is so lovely! i would love to hang this right next to the bathroom mirror :)

  43. this is just what i needed!

  44. Sometimes our anxious minds really do get in the way, don’t they? Love this reminder.

  45. Lovely…and so true as a mother. Thanks for sharing.

  46. Love this. What a great reminder.

  47. Thanks for this! Husband away for work, trying to be a good mom, feeling like a terrible employee at work, feeling tired, fat and I have a cold sore!

  48. Yes! Beautiful indeed and so true. We are our own worst critics – cliché I know but so darned true. That is a keeper of a quote to read again and again when we’re feeling like we’re in murky waters. Thanks.

  49. I’ve never thought of it this way.

    When my friends are having terrible times and feeling down on themselves, I tell them I wish they could see themselves the way that I and others do. Funny that I have never thought to tell myself the same.

    Thanks for this, Joanna!

  50. I love this quote! Does anyone know who wrote it?

  51. Thank goodness I can’t see myself sleeping and reading and looking at loved ones. I’m sure it would be a cringe-worthy moment. Kind of like when you hear your own voice played back in a phone message.

  52. I love it. I use to print quotes I love, hang them in my room’s wall and read it everyday multiple times for a long time. They become like a mantra. Gonna print this now. Thanks.

  53. I needed this comfort so deeply this morning. Thank you for sharing, Joanna.

  54. A lovely reminder. Thank you.

  55. oh Joanna, your posts somehow often manage to trigger something deep within me and I find myself welling with tears! thank you for your words and content.

  56. What a great thing to remember when you’re having a bad day!

  57. I love this quote especially I was a crazy, anxiety riddled, grumpy and tired (thanks time change) mama bear yesterday. I felt ugly all around. I think I will have to post this quote on our chalkboard for a spell! Thanks :) Sonia

  58. incredible

  59. So true, and I never thought of it that way.