Picture this: You’re on a date with someone you really like, but…

…there’s no chemistry. No spark. Not a single firework. You’re nervous and a little chatty. You start wondering if it’s really a date—maybe you’re just two friends hanging out?

Well, Joan Rivers (of all people) shared a brilliant tip years ago: Pretend that you’re kissing. During the evening—as you walk to the movie theater, as you wait in line for popcorn, as you find seats—pretend in the back of your mind that you’re kissing your date the entire time.

I shared this dating tip on Glamour four years ago, but since a lot of people are new to Cup of Jo and weren’t reading my column back then, I wanted to share it again.

It sounds random, but I tried it on dates and it really works. Amazingly, the mental trick changes your body language (you’ll lean in closer and tilt your head slightly), slows down the pace of your conversation (especially when you’re nervous) and helps your confidence skyrocket (you’ll feel bold and sexy). Your date will pick up on your subtle cues; by the time you actually kiss each other, the sparks will be flying.

Isn’t that a great tip? Would you try it?

P.S. Just for fun, I kind of want to try with Alex the next time we’re on a date night:)

(Photo from Moonrise Kingdom; tip originally shared on Glamour)