What are you up to this weekend? I’ve been reading a lot and it makes me feel so centered. If you’re looking for a new book to cuddle up with, I’m halfway through Breasts and Eggs by Mieko Kawakami, and it is fantastic. (I also love the cover.) Take gentle care of yourself, as my mom would say, and if you’re in a blog-reading mood, here are a few links from around the web…
Eyeing this dinner recipe.
Is Taylor Wolfe the funniest person on Instagram right now?
Bystander intervention training — it’s one hour and free.
“My Persian grandmother reviews my favorite brands,” including Trader Joe’s and Peleton. (The New Yorker)
What comes next, after the pandemic. “I miss the way my mom, whom I haven’t seen in over a year, pulls my face close to hers for a kiss on the cheek when I lean in to hug her. I miss the enthusiastic bear hug I share when I visit my old roommate Jason who now lives across the country. I miss running into my friend Erin, who I know doesn’t like to hug at all, at a comedy club, and offering a friendly and respectful head nod across the table, which I think is its own kind of intimacy. Here’s a humiliating fact about me: I am too pliable a hugger, and when someone pulls me close to their body I often end up standing with my forehead nestled to their shoulder, worried that they think I’m about to start crying. I even kind of miss that.” (New York Magazine)
A new pasta shape.
Wow, this green sofa.
This book looks really beautiful.
Plus, three reader comments:
Says Toni on 15 reader comments on parenting: “I was waiting to pick up my daughter from school, and a four-year-old girl was with her mom. The little gal was crying and her mom knelt down to wipe her face but the daughter put her hand up and said, ‘Don’t wipe away my sads. I’m not done being sad yet.’ That got me right in the gut.”
Says Olivia on being Asian-American today: “A close friend of mine is Indian-American, born and raised in Massachusetts. She also happens to be one of two infectious diseases doctors at the hospital where we work. Once, an older male doctor asked her, ‘Where are you from?’ She responded, Massachusetts. He goes, ‘No, where are your parents from?’ She responded, ‘Oh, you mean why am I brown.’ Burn, man.”
Says H. on being Asian-American today: “As a Chinese and Vietnamese immigrant child, it was ingrained in me to be respectful of authority and elders, to not argue back, to be the bigger person and ignore the aggressor when verbally attacked, and to put my head down, study, and work hard because, sooner or later, I will be acknowledged for all my accomplishments (as if accomplishments can erase all the hurt that was caused by countless overt aggressions and micro-aggressions by ignorant, racist people). Now as an adult, I realized the mistake my parents unknowingly made in teaching me to be an obedient child. That is, my inner voice was traded for approval from my parents, my teachers and authority. Growing up in the U.S., it was difficult to speak up to defend myself in many settings. For example, in high school (early 90s), a white male teacher allowed kids in my class to share racists jokes against minorities, and I was so uncomfortable and refused to participate while students around me laughed. Yet, I didn’t speak up against that teacher because of the power dynamics of teacher and student relationship and the ingrained respect I must show my teacher. Thinking back to that time, I can still recall the awfulness I felt in my chest and stomach. I regret so much not speaking out against it. I am now a mother, and I am teaching my girls that their voice matters, that their opinions matter as much as their parents or any person, even if that person is the President of the United States. They are allowed and encouraged to disagree. My hope is that they will use their voice to speak up for themselves and for anyone who experiences any form of racism or aggression. Their voice is their power.”
(Photo by thepurrstlady.)
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