Have a Lovely Weekend.

That’s good too! Happy for you! :) I am one where I think the relationship I have with my sister is the most fulfilling in my life. I am very family oriented and get a LOT of joy and fulfillment from the relationships with my husband and my son too, but my sister and I will always have a connection that can’t be replicated, and in quite different arenas than I have with the other people in my life.

The point I took from the article wasn’t “you’re an idiot if you don’t put friendship first,” it was more like, “there are so many kinds of intimate relationships out there that people may value, and none outweigh any other so long as they’re rooted in love and respect.”

I thought the same thing! I have lots of great friends but sometimes I feel sad that I don’t have a ‘best’ friend and then I remember that I do – I married him 32 years ago.

Oh man, I’d love to give jewelry to everyone attending my funeral. :)

Andrea, sorry to comment on your baked goods post, but I want to address the Anon reply. Anon, my husband dropped dead in my kitchen on a sunny June evening. No planning, no beauty, no nothing. But a month later, when we’d had time to process, we had a beautiful sunset paddle out into the Pacific Ocean for him. When I read this article, it all just SPOKE to me. I have a lot of widow friends, and with a couple we’ve even talked about starting a nonprofit to help widows and widowers after the death. I absolutely was floored reading how I could help before too. There are so many options to show up. We all don’t get to have our choice, but we can all try to make it better – better financial planning, better support, better at death all around. I wish you well <3

K, as someone who has never really had a long term romantic partner, but has had a lot of friends disappear into their relationships, I understand the feeling of the twisting knife. It’s kind of everywhere all of the time always in this culture… I suppose we always want what we can’t have?

Not “apparently” some people’s lives. A lot of people’s lives.

Why does talk or articles that finally shed a light and bring to the forefront close friendships twist a knife?

In our society and for a long time, emphasis is placed on building a life around a partner and children, especially for women. We’ve made strides in that an unwed person isn’t automatically looked down upon. What everyone fails to talk about or give voice to is intimate relationships outside of marriage or partnering. I’m happy people are finally giving voice to this.

If someone’s closest friend/confident/person is struggling or passes away, why aren’t people allowed to grieve the same way as if a spouse dies, or help the way they’d be allowed if there is an illness? The loss can be just as devastating, but in society we’re expected to move on within days.

The article isn’t an attack on people who choose to make their spouse the center of their life. It’s showing there are different kinds of intimate relationships that are just as meaningful.

Katie… I’m sorry you felt so offended by what I said. I did not in any way mean to depreciate the value of close relationships outside of marriage. All you said is true! And I don’t even live in a society where the emphasis on marriage is a high as in the US apparently. I didn’t read the article as an attack and neither did I attack anyone.

Why does it twist a knife?
I don’t know a better expression.
Because not having a friendship like this is another form of loneliness.

Liz… I understand what you mean and I totally agree. One type of relationship is not a replacement for the other and it never should be. But again this isn’t even what I meant.

I was also intimidated by dahlias at first, but you can DEFINITELY handle them. Just give them a little space, a sunny spot, and put the tubers in ‘eye up’ and they will perform.
If you’d like a suggestion – I LOVE my Linda’s Baby tubers. I have all sorts and start some from seed to see what I will get each year, but she is just a very reliable grower with nice long stems and the peachy pink color goes with almost everything else I grow. You’re going to love having them to cut!!