On Becoming Anti-Racist

I enjoy your blog and so appreciate you for making this thoughtful post and reading and reaching out. Something I would love to also hear from you and all of us who are really just waking up to anti-racism because of, and since George Floyd’s murder, is that you own that you are generations and your whole life time late to this reality. That you know that this is because systemic racism is powerful and successful and that none of this is new. That ‘George Floyds’ have been kneeled on, murdered, robbed, raped, abused, falsely arrested and imprisoned, and otherwise oppressed by white people and by our government for 400 years because of racism. And because white people and really all non-Black people have been actively or passively participating in systemic racism, for 400 years.

Thank you very much for your article and information. I am definitely interested in reading a number of these resources so I can better understand. I am horrified and sickened by the murders of unarmed black men taking place. Knowing personally many very honorable police officers, I have a difficult time knowing what to do to make things better, knowing that there are bad people in the world and that, regardless of race relations, there are those who will still do bad things.
What I am trying to understand is “reverse discrimination”. I know that many people disagree that it even exists; however, I believe that is a matter of perspective.
Please explain to me why I should not be frustrated in these situations:
1. I am a white female. I came from a lower income family in a large city and lived in a school district with a large percentage of Hispanic and Black students. My mother was a secretary. My stepfather was abusive. I worked very hard to do well in school so I could rise above this environment (meaning poverty and abuse). Due to hard work, I was fortunate to be able to go to college. I worked hard and went to a professional school (with a high percentage of minority students) on 100% loans. While at the school I started a host program for people seeking acceptance to the school. This was intended to ease the financial burden of travel expenses for the interview process and to help applicants get to know other students in the school. I suggested that if we were limited in the number of applicants we could host, the selection should be based on financial need or ranking based on admissions criteria. Unfortunately, the administration only wanted this opportunity to be given to minority students, regardless of financial need or rank of application.
Additionally, at this school there were multiple opportunities for internships, etc, ONLY given to minority students. White students were not given any options. I specifically desired a particular internship but was refused participation because I was white.
2. I instilled a strong work ethic in my children. My son was a 4.0 student in high school, taking honors classes. He was a very good athlete and participated in leadership positions. There was a very large scholarship available. The decision came down to 2 students: my son vs a girl in his class (both white, so not really race related but still an example of discrimination). I was told that he did not receive the scholarship because (due to my profession) it was assumed that I made more than her parents (though I make half of the typical salary in my profession and I know they are wealthy). My daughter, however, has lost opportunities for scholarships because she was not a minority student, even though she was well qualified.
While I realize that for generations various ethnic groups have been and still are being discriminated against. However, why should I or any other person be refused opportunities based on race? How is this not the same? Why should I pay the penalty my ancestors should have paid?

A while ago, I think it was last year, I read a post here about a beautiful apartment filled with plants, it was probably one of the apartment tours. At the very end of the post was a photo of the owner, a black man. I was surprised when I saw his photo, and it made me think about why I was surprised and I realised that it’s because we don’t see representations of black men associated with positive things like loving plants, such an ordinary thing.

I wanted to post a comment about this at the time, as I thought it was important but I didn’t. I didn’t because I was worried that my comment would be taken the wrong way, because I didn’t feel confident talking about race in America, as a white middle class woman living in England. Now I regret that I wasn’t brave enough, those are exactly the sorts of conversations that we should be having, perhaps particularly white middle class women.

I guess I’m trying to say that we all need to be talking about this stuff, all the time. Maybe especially white middle class women like me.

Thank you for this post, Joanna
I’ve been trying to manage my anger and sorrow, and find the resources and conversation here very helpful. One thing that I’ve done and would encourage others to do – I’ve written my public library asking for increased accessibility to the books listed here. Our public library is fantastic, and has made many more e-books and audiobooks available during the self-quarantine period, but the wait list for “Me and White Supremacy” is 20 weeks!
It’s great to buy books, but I think it’s so important to make these valuable titles available to everyone now. Libraries are a tool for social justice! I’m encouraged by how many people are yearning to understand our nation’s racist legacy and change our future. I understand it will require more than just reading books, but educating ourselves is a necessary step, and free access to these important books benefits the community.
This ties into another thing I feel is so essential going forward – Speak Up!

When I was in my young teen years, I remember reading a book, Black Like Me, by John Howard Griffin. It was a eye opener for me, since I grew up in a all white neighborhood, and went to a all white school. I encourage anyone that has not read it to do so.
As I got older, more people moved out from Detroit, MI, to Pontiac, MI. I started attending a church, which it was called a Kingdom Hall. My husband and I attended it because it was in the territory where we lived at the time. We were the minority! It was attended by all blacks. We made such good friends there! Black families are very warm and loving people. I remember one member always taking my hand in hers and padding it and saying, “There is my sweet white baby”. I will never forget how good I felt!

I’m part of a campaign to create an elected civilian oversight board for the police in nyc: https://www.stoppoliceviolencenyc.org/
If anyone is interested in getting involved let me know! I’d recommend everyone get involved in police reform locally until policing as we know it can be abolished. Stay safe everyone <3

Racism has no color, ethnicity and/or gender boundaries…the proverbial knife cuts both ways.

While it is n’t an “action oriented” book, “the Warmth of Other Suns,” a history of the black migration from the South from the 1910s-1970s, gave this white woman new insights into the deep roots of racial inequality in this country, such as Jim Crow laws, redlining and sunset laws. It also brings home the depth of what blacks in the south had to endure and still do – the vulnerability of being black when any white person could end your life at any moment with absolutely no consequences. Heartbreaking and educational,,

I have to say over the last couple of days I been thinking about the word abolitionist and how “active” that word is. Anti-racist seems passive to me, but and abolitionist is someone who takes action. Moving forward, as a white woman, that is how I plan to identify myself.

I think it’s important just to be nice to people, regardless of color. I don’t expect to be treated differently because of my color, and I don’t want that, but color alone shouldn’t be a reason to disrespect someone or hurt them.

We’ve made the conscious decision to opt out of private schools, or flee our city to the suburbs where the schools are “better” (euphemism for white & upper income), which uphold systemic white supremacy, and opt for our neighborhood school, which is filled with global majority students who are mostly poor. Our white child is no better than those kids, and he deserves no more or less than they do. Their lives are valuable. We love him, but he’s not special. We want him to see the kids in our neighborhoods are human beings and he is not entitled to anything more. He already had myriad advantages as a white boy. I’ll never understand the resource hoarding that middle and upper middle class white parents engage in getting the “best” for their kids by enrolling them in private, elite schools. They act like kids of color and poverty is a disease their kids can catch. Kinda hard to talk to talk to kids about the injustices and violence done to black and brown kids, especially poor ones, when there are none sitting in the room. Also, as a white parent, I shut up and let other voices be heard. Fighting for Integrated Schools (y’all in NYC have a great student-led program @ Integrate NYC) and FAIR FUNDING for public schools!

MB,
I really appreciate your thoughtful post.

This is an important topic, but I think it’s a much deeper and bigger issue. Racism is not limited to a certain race or religion. There is racism within races. Not all white people hate black people. Not all black people hate white people. And this is not limited to just black and white. There are many skin colors and many cultures. None of us chose the color of our skin.

My religious beliefs teach me all our created equal. I can’t change the world. I can’t control other people or their actions, but I can choose my behavior. My choice is to be kind and to treat all people how I would want to be treated. I believe these values start at home. I value all human life and have taught my children the same. I also believe that change starts with each of us.

It’s a big issue. Where do we start? What can each of us do? Perhaps educating ourselves. Being open to hear, and actually consider, the opinions of others without being disrespectful. Vote. Be a part of your community and actively work on issues. Look for opportunities to serve others. I don’t have ANY answers for sure – but I am actively looking for ways I can make a difference – even if only in some small way.

Our media outlets choose which stories to run and many times, inflame, enable discord and division. People of all colors and cultures are sadly murdered and receive absolutely no media coverage. When events like this occur, I try to educate myself with all the facts and form an educated opinion and not just react.

As Americans, we do have the right to peacefully protest. We do not have the right to loot, burn property or harm our communities. Nothing positive comes from it. (IMHO)

My heart is with Mr. Floyd’s family and the residents of Minneapolis.

I thank all the COJ posters for taking the time to share their thoughts on this important issue. Even if we don’t all agree on an issue, its important to consider the words and experiences of others and the reader posts always allow me that opportunity.

Thank you for this post. I run a studio that really emphasizes on diversity both in front and behind the camera. There are countless of companies that refuse to hire POC or cast POC. When all that we see on the screen is POC being portrayed as villains, that is how we’ll perceive them in real life. The racism dates so far back, that today – we’ve been accustomed to modern day segregation (redlining), and racism in all fields and industries. It’s so upsetting, and we need laws to change. We need school curriculums to be updated.

I hope people take a look at their communities to see if they know POC, speak to POC, have friends who are POC, because if we continue to live in our own echo chambers, we will never understand each other. Empathy and compassion go a long way.

How much of racism is in fact classism or predjudice?
POC are historically disadvantaged in the US but even in their own original countries they are viciously classist/predjudiced among themselves. We all are to some degree.

While color is the surface issue, it is so much about social class. And that needs to be illuminated. Recognizing the difference allows personal understanding of how to become better and more inclusive.

This is why events like Burning Man are so cathartic for people, because literally everyone under the sun can just BE. . . together. Entirely free of social convention. And we all love that every time. Of course it’s not a perfect example. But those who’ve experienced this type of understanding have a civic duty to live that truth with love in their own sphere of influence.

One easy thing to do is make a conscious effort to remember our words matter. For example, on your list above, rather than writing you have learned a lot from the Instagram accounts of… write “I have learned a lot from the people who created the Instagram accounts…”.

Social media can be incredibly dehumanizing. By identifying the people behind the accounts who are authors, advocates, educators, scholars, etc. and are putting in an incredible amount of emotional and academic labor to teach the rest of us, we can keep our conversations people centered. When we center our conversations that way, we are more likely to support these people monetarily for their efforts.

This includes you. You are Joanna. You are not Cup of Jo. You are Joanna who created Cup of Jo, an amazing, supportive space full of followers who are eager to learn. ❤️