The New Yorker published a few Valentine’s Day poems for married people.
Winter.
It’s been dark for, like, five hours,
And yet the children are still awake,
And I am only a little drunk.
What you call yelling I call making a point.
Alex and I were laughing out loud. Happy Valentine’s Day! xoxo
(Illustration by Ellen van Engelen.)
Absolutely hilarious!!
Um, yes! Pretty much encapsulates our day…except I’m not even a little drunk.
hahah this is amazing. i’m not even married (just in a long term, LDR) and we spent valentine’s day watching re-runs of the 2015 crossfit games… this is love!
this is so special for couples
happy valentines day
checkout my blog on valentines day http://happyvalentinesdayweek.com
The best part about this is it’s nice to know you aren’t the only one feeling the feelings here (!)
Analog House
http://theanaloghouse.blogspot.com/
hahah this is amazing. i’m not even married (just in a long term, LDR) and we spent valentine’s day watching re-runs of the 2015 crossfit games… this is love!
hammyta.wordpress.com
Happy Valentine’s Day to you too! I almost forgot about it because New York Fashion Week is in full swing and I’ve been running around to shows. Which might be a good thing, because I’m single! Instead I had dinner with some other style bloggers visiting NYC and it was great!! xx yael
Laughing out loud at the office! Loved every one of them! Thanks for sharing.
“They’re free to maybe see other people.
I thought that was interesting.”
So funny.
– Happily married in Nairobi
Hahaha! Thank you Jo, you made me laugh!
X
Miri
hahahahahahahahahahah i had to call my husband over to read these with me!!!! and now bookmarking for when i need a good laugh…thanks!!! Marriage isn’t always pretty, but damn its good to be able to laugh at yourselves!!
…. Loved every bit of this … Brilliant find !!!
Karen in VA
http://tomsoutletonline.bedcapdealers.com
Enjoy reading your blog. Have a nice week.
The author of these hilarious poems wrote an equally hilarious, wonderful book called “Truth In Advertising.” An awesome read, perfect for a weekend like this!
I am envious that you were laughing at these. I just read them in horror. Good poems, but sad sad sad to me. But I love that you loved them and laughed.
I am with Shena on this one. I love a good laugh, but this poem struck me as very sad.
I think they’re funny but also kinda sad too! As long as the couple keeps their sense of humor about this stuff and realizes that life isn’t picture perfect all the time then I think it’s all good
I am not knocking anyone’s taste in humor, yet I also don’t find these funny. Every marriage has rocky spots, but some of these poems capture nothing but sorrow, and are more cringe-worthy than laughable. If some of these couples actually feel this way every single day, then they married the wrong person, and should maybe end the relationship….
Oh thank goodness I’m not the only one who didn’t find this funny at all! Married ten years, three kids and one on the way and this doesn’t describe any day for us, let alone Valentine’s Day. :( Do people really see marriage this way?
Agreed. The one about the mentos for breakfast was funny and very true (Well, almost. I’ve never actually let my son have mentos for breakfast:) but most of them were just very sad.
it’s just so incredibly true – p nobles
I guess I’m the only one who thought these were pretty much awful. Even as satire, what a horrible picture of marriage! If some these ring true for you, aside from embracing tv for kids and finding it challenging to watch a movie, I don’t know why you’d stay married! I’ve been with my husband almost fourteen years, and these just made me sad.
I agree with you 100%
Yeah, same boat here. I related to a couple (the one about never watching a movie the whole way through) but for the most part am glad my marriage is not like that (yes, even with two little ones).
Loved these! I’m gonna bookmark these for those days when I need a parenting laugh & a glass of wine (I won’t admit how often that is)!
Xo Lendy
http://www.twoplusluna.com
Lol so funny! I used to think it was so depressing reading things like this – or articles on parenting where mom’s sounded so negative. I swore I would never feel that way! LOL! I now have 2 under 2 and romance for my partner and I was taking a nap while both girls napped yesterday! Love it!
“Wait. Today is Valentine’s Day?” lol.
Laughed until I had tears in my eyes. Loved the one about the massage at the sink then grabbing the boobs. Too funny!
I could not love this more. I’m dying laughing. Thank you.
I let one of my kids have mentos for breakfast yesterday, but they were fruit flavored, so that’s sorta healthy, right? And they watched Handy Manny, so they are learning Spanish. I feel like I’m totally winning at this whole parenting thing. With four kids seven and under, and copious snow days, we are all still alive and nobody is crying at the moment. Yes, totally winning :)
This is cute! We had a night in for Valentine’s Day too. No kids yet and not drunk since I’m pregnant, but we had a lot of good comfort food, fancy chocolate and watched the Godfather – if you’d like to see, I have recipes, food and cat photos on my Valentine’s post on my blog :) – Charlie, http://www.lemonbutterlove.com
Oh my goodness. Hilarious. Can’t decide which is my favorite. . . but this one is really high up there:
“And, just so we’re clear, you’re signalling, “I’m going to call my sister and order sushi. You should do something, too.”
Oh and then the one about “some couples watch the whole movie in a single sitting.”
Laughing out loud! Too funny!
Hahaha! This is gold!
LOL. I don’t have any kids yet – but this is still pretty funny!
Every. Single. One: Hilarious.
“And yes, you can have Mentos for breakfast…”
You always make me smile. I’m so grateful that you stay consistently true to what makes you happy or thoughtful, it’s a gift for those of us on the other side of the screen because it feels whole.
Hahah! I’m definitely ready for it to not be dark so early :) Hope you had a good v-day!
The one about watching movies in twenty minute increments… Yep. Ha.
Hahaha, it is funny as it is true :D
Cute poem, Happy Valentine’s Day!
Prudence
http://www.prudencepetitestyle.com
Lol this is too comical I love it!
Haha, six months into our marriage I think we’re still in the Honeymoon stage (plus no kids just yet!) but I’m guessing in a few years this may well hit home! x
Aw-Happy Valentine’s all x
That made my Monday.
“I have heard that some couples watch the whole movie in a single sitting.
Food for thought.”
My husband and I also just laugh/cried while reading these… Amazingly, horrifically true to life.
Those are so dark! I enjoyed them, they are beautifully written. But man, they make marriage sound like a horror story.
Too funny. I couldn’t resist taking a print out of these poems and present them to my wife along with her Valentine’s day present. My son was shocked to see my wife laughing so hard. :)
Ummmm I am dying laughing at the sweatpants poem. As we lie in our bed, not touching. Lol.
Absolutely hilarious!!
Wait! Today is Valentine’s Day?
Loved these…
Um, yes! Pretty much encapsulates our day…except I’m not even a little drunk.
Too funny!! My husband and i have tears running down our faces right now.
Lol .. So true
A post on a Sunday! Special treat <3
Including the joy of Rihanna and the coat I keep spotting in Brooklyn.
Nine people on the NYC streets shared their outfits.
10 funny stories (including Prince Harry!).
We were surprised by the winner — and the loser.
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