Do You Ever Get Freaked Out at Night?

To all those complaining that we are so freaked without our husbands … well … i can’t explain it, i’m a perfectly grown woman in every other way. i think it is all the crime dramas that and constant news and media telling us how vulnerable we are. i do think a lot of the fear is a natural growth from all of that. it’s unfortunate but it still resides within and is very hard to deal with. i do not sleep well when my husband is away, either. he doesn’t get it. interesting that gender difference huh? i usually wake up in the middle of the night, “frozen” in bed, making something out of every sound. i have terrible scary dreams that i wake up from in a cold sweat. i am afraid to go downstairs for water or into the next room to pee. i live for the sound of a door being smashed. i make myself know where my car keys are so i can drive to a 24-hour brightly lit gas station if danger occurs. i sleep with the cell phone next to the bed. i am guilty of waking up at 2-3 a.m. and staying up till 5:30-6 a.m. on the internet watching something like lark rise to candleford until i feel safe at that point to pass out for a few more hours from sheer exhaustion. i don’t take showers at night when he’s not home. it’s awful, paralyzing, 99 percent irrational fear but it’s very real and very debilitating. i don’t know. that’s just what it is. i like when my husband is home = light sleeper (even though we sleep in separate bedrooms b/c his snoring keeps me up all night) and not easily freaked by night stuff.

I am going through this right now. I was actually looking for a solution when I found this. My boyfriend works overnight so all but two nights a week I have to sleep alone. I usually leave the TV on because somehow it seems to soothe me, but I was told today that it’s just using too much energy and there is no reason to leave it on while I’m asleep. I don’t have a night light or money right now and the dogs chew up anything they can get their mouth on (pillows, blankets, stuffed animals), and his dad hates when the hall light is on, so you see my dilema. On top of that, they never lock the front door, saying we live in the country so we are fine (BS!!) and they have never had to lock it before, but I am not really worried too much about burglars and intruders anyway. Honestly, I’m mostly worried about ghosts and things (silly, I know, but I believe in that stuff). They don’t have to use the front door. For some reason lights and/or tv just make me feel safer, but I guess I’ll have to cuddle my giant teddy bear that he gave me last Valentines Day and deal until I can get a night light. :/

I think everyone is nervous when they are alone and in the dark. I like being along through the day but as soon as evening creeps in I get paranoid. I definately agree that those with massive houses with large windows at the front of their house are brave!!

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This is so reassuring! And great advice!

Music and light are so important. Our “vintage” house has bizarre wiring with light switches in all the wrong rooms. This drove us crazy until the first night I was home alone. You can light up the whole house from right outside our bedroom! It’s not wasting energy, it’s a makeshift security system….

But on the scariest nights, (my husband is in the army) I may or may not set up his dummy rubber machine guns around the house to scare of any potential intruders. They’re harmless, but a dark silhouette of one of those monsters could scare off any neighborhood robber!

I am a scaredy cat too! I just moved in to a nice tiny (500 sq ft) house, and that helps a lot. There are not many hiding places so I can do a quick sweep before I go to bed, but I rarely do. This might freak you out – my bedroom window looks out to the porch and front door, and the only place for my bed is under that window. I mounted an old gate to the bottom half of the window so I do feel safe, but when the plumber showed up early and came to my door yesterday morning, I actually answered him from bed. I have learned to not let my imagination get to me and ignore the little noises.

Sigh. Okay, ladies, here how it is:

It’s perfectly normal to be scared of sleeping alone. I can understand it.

But if you’re going to allow yourself to be ruled by your fear and become a victim, do me a favor: Shut up and go make me a sammich.

Otherwise, make a plan, get a weapon, and if you get a prowler, END him/her/it.

Yes!!!! I am such a scaredy cat! I have guard cats thank goodness… I can always tell if something is awry because they start getting crazy. A noisemaker has really helped me to stay asleep because I don’t hear any creaks, etc. Check out the “sleep machine light” app, you iPhone becomes a sleep machine and its free!

It feels really good to know that I’m not alone in this! I have such a hard time falling asleep when my husband is away. I can so easily work myself up over the tiniest sound.

I can’t imagine being terrified of my own shadow at night.

I am like Anonymous from earlier in this comment thread: I own a firearm for intruders, a fire extinguisher for fires, and I sleep well at night. Arm yourselves, women, and quit acting like ninnies. :)

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We got robbed a few months ago, they carried out everything, even the bloody alarm clock! Now my husband has been away for 3 weeks and I sleep with the biggest kitchen knife on the night stand. I try not to think about it too much or I get scared :) :)

Dude, *I* want the Filson backpack.

I lie awake at night when my husband’s gone too. I’m totally a “what was that!?!” nightime wondering sort. Plus when my poor husband comes home post call super early the next morning after I’ve finally fallen asleep I’ve been known to clock him one good out of sheer fear and surprise in my sleepy state before I realize it’s him! Ouch….

I’ve slept alone for almost a year now, and one night during my first few weeks in my new apartment, someone opened my apartment door in the middle of the night. Looking back on it, I probably left the door unlocked and a visitor of the neighbor’s likely had the wrong apt number. But seeing the light from the hallway appear and then disappear again when the person realized their mistake and shut the door was the most frightening thing that has ever happened to me. I ran downstairs and cried to the building’s concierge, and had a deadbolt installed the next day. Now that, basically, the worst has happened, I feel pretty secure in my high-security tower and I know logically that anyone who would be in the hallway is a resident or approved guest.

Im terrified sleeping alone. I usually end up hopping in my sis’ bed :] Much to her chagrin haha!

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Actually, I love being home alone! I still live at home and sometimes my mom and little brother will go out of town without me (so mean right?!) and I’ll spend a couple of nights at my boyfriend’s, but I always reserve one night to stay home. I get to enjoy a glass of wine, do my nails, watch whatever I want on TV (we only one), walk around naked (TMI?), and then I go to sleep early and cuddle up with a book. Bliss.

All the time I was single and living by myself, I never got scared because I always lived in small apartments. But when I’m staying at my parents and for some reason they need to go away; or in my current house without boyfriend, I always sleep with bathroom and kitchen lights on. (not counting the times I sleep on the couch, because I feel I can run away easier from the living room than from the bedroom) And I totally stopped watching Criminal Minds AND Supernatural, which I loved – both scare the hell out of me. Have a lovely weekend, all brave scared ladies out there ;))

I sleep very good when my husband is travelling for work, but i prefer when he is with us

the idea of the car key, ha ha…
but my car is usually parked a bit far away ; )

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I’m a single woman which means I have to brave the creepy-crawlies and the scary-waries all by myself. One day I hope to be just like you so that I don’t have to fend for myself all the time.

I have an extinguisher for fires and a gun for home invaders. There are rules for using each safely and responsibly. So, no, I’m not afraid because I am a rational adult and I have a plan for emergencies.

Wow. I’m amazed at all the comments, I can definitely relate to a lot of these feelings and tricks we’ve all developed to ease the anxiety. So so comforting to know it’s not just me. Thanks Joanna for the post.

We are one half of a duplex and the other half has been vacant for years. One New Years eve, we were staying in, just lounging around. I heard furniture moving- even though it is vacant! We called the police, and the burglar was caught, but it freaked me out. We have two dogs who bark at any noise and yet, they didn’t bark that night! Thankfully I am almost never the only person in the house- we have two kids, two dogs and two cats- and my husband rarely travels overnight.

Two days ago I would have said, ‘not me’ I’ve lived alone and I’m okay with sleeping alone.

then I saw the tiniest mouse in our apartment.

Now I’m so jumpy and I just know it will crawl on me in my sleep. (thats crazy) I should be afraid of actual intruders but instead I’m unhinged by a mouse!

I don’t like sleeping alone, but not because things go bump in the night. There are two things that freak me out, but neither of them are rational, so I don’t share my fear with anyone. Not even my best friend knows and I tell her practically everything.

please, please, please put a “Read more” button, especially since the picture is not a ‘read more’ link. Thanks!

Sorry if this comment is harsh, but I can’t help it:

Oh my god ! Sleeping with a Navy-issue pump-action shotgun next to bed. Either some of you people live in a very unhealthy place or need to relax a bit. You are probably more likely to shoot your husband coming early as a surprise or a neighbor coming for help than someone really dangerous.

This is the kind of thing that makes the world say the US is crazy. I’d never ever sleep with a loaded gun by my bedside.

Try having a glass of wine, a warm shower, cuddling up to a good book in bed, sending a good night sms to your boyfriend and easing into sleep rather than propping a gun, turning on the lights and looking in the distant bushes to check for some mean guy hiding.

Horrified overseas

PS the case i am referring to sound more like psychological disorder than a normally freaked in the night person…

I used to watch Criminal Minds all the time and had to stop because I started freaking out at night. My husband just got home from a 3-month business trip and at night I had every light in the house on and I borrowed a friend’s Navy-issue pump-action shotgun. I propped it up next to my bed. I also have a dog that barks like mad any time anything moves outside the window or door. Even with all of that, I only got about 4-5 hours of sleep a night. It was horrible.

This is an awesome post!
My husband and i work nights, so there are many nights i am alone. When we lived in high rises it was no big deal, only one point of entry. But now we live in a 2/2 house 1200 sqft and i hear all the noises, doesnt help that the windows are single pain either!
I have a lab, who eases my mind, but i dont know what id do w/o my dog.
I blame it on the scary movie addiction!

I have experience no fear when sleeping alone in my house, but the panic button tip is very useful, I will remember that.

thanks for sharing!

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Fiona, I must say that I concur… not cute

Not a good women stereotype to keep

I personally do not, absolutely not see how this can be an issue. I can picture my mom rolling her eyes and saying “oh grow up” if I were to say something like that to her and my bf would be like “oh great, now I have to wonder if you are ok because I leave you alone, an adult, at home at night, want a babysitter or a nightlight ?”…