Motherhood

A Dad’s Hilarious Side of the Birth Story

After Alex shared his side of Toby’s birth story, I thought I’d share a few more stories of dads’ sides of the birth story. First up is Rob Beesley, husband of my friend Sharon; his adorable and touching story will make you laugh out loud…xoxo

Here’s Rob’s story…

Our daughter Ella was born on July 10, 2005 in a small hospital on the North Shore of Oahu, Hawaii. I was a 26-year-old pizza delivery guy that hadn’t yet finished college. Needless to say, her birth changed my life for the better…

What was your role during the birth?
Basically I was in charge of everything easy: change the channel on the TV, get more ice, make sure Sharon’s chords didn’t get tangled while she was going to the bathroom and remind her how to breathe. Anything that didn’t require a medical degree. Or any degree at this point.

What did you do to make your wife feel better? Did it work?
A lot of what I tried to do to make Sharon feel better was done beforehand. I went to the birthing classes and watched videos of women delivering their children. I took a tour of the hospital and pretended to read What to Expect When You’re Expecting. I also became a master of the classic Hee Hee Hoo lamaze breathing.

During the actual delivery, Sharon noticed she could see my tongue during the “Hoos.” She finally screamed out, “Stop Hooing! I can see your ugly tongue. It looks like a slimy worm.” Fortunately I’d already had nine months of a hormonal pregnancy to prepare me for this moment, and I made sure that my tongue was not seen again for the rest of the delivery.

What were you thinking during the experience? What was your dominant emotion?
I remember thinking, I can’t believe this is happening right now. I’m gonna be a dad. I can’t believe I am going to be someone’s dad. I hope she gets Sharon’s smile. Should I grab the camera? Should I be standing by Sharon side or closer to the action? What if I don’t feel anything different when I see her? Why are we naming her Ella? We have less than $300 in our checking account. I hope she gets Sharon’s eyes. I wonder if she already knows how much we love her?

Who else was in the room? Thumbs up/down?
For most of the delivery, it was just the nurse, Sharon and me. Ella was born in Hawaii, and our families were a few thousand miles away. I loved it. Sometimes when people are around, I worry I am not going to have the right reaction. Like when someone gives me a birthday present and I hope my face looks how they wanted it to look when I open it. Not that I am comparing the birth of my daughter to a pair of socks. But that when it was just Sharon and me, my reaction could be sincere.

Any surprising things about the birth that you hadn’t expected?
Sharon’s water never broke and the amniotic sac actually came out in tact. It’s officially called an “en-caul” birth. It looked like a jellyfish was coming out! Then the nurse grabbed the sac and popped it with her hands. Immediately after that, I could see the very top of Ella’s head. She had long black hair and for a few minutes it looked like Sharon was going to give birth to a puppy. Sharon pushed some more, and I was relieved to see the face of a baby.


How did you feel right when the baby was born? Freaked? Tired? Happy? Nothing at first?
I felt hopeful. Like this little baby could be or do anything she wanted to be. I wanted to give her that. Like that horrible Creed song, “With Arms Wide Open!” haha. It was the first time I had ever felt instant love for anyone or anything. I was proud to be her father. I wanted to hold her. I had pretty much kept myself together until I saw Sharon holding Ella. I tried to say, “Look at my girls,” but I couldn’t because I started to cry. I was so happy.

What moment do you remember most clearly when thinking back to that day?
There is a moment when the doctor was first holding her and I can still see her little face. She kept sticking out her tongue. I loved that she doing exactly what I had just been yelled at for by my wife. Sharon was even crazy enough to ask the doctor if there was something wrong with her tongue. Nope, nothing wrong he said. Ella just had a worm tongue like me.

If you could do it over, what would you have done differently?
Sharon was induced a week after her due date. We knew exactly when we were going to be admitted to the hospital. In preparation, we rented the movie Danny Deckchair to watch during the induction. Horrible choice that I still feel bad about. There must have been a better option in 2005. If Ella has horrible taste in movies, it’s all our fault.

(Ella has gotten twin brothers since then:)

Thank you so much, Rob! How adorable is his story?

P.S. Previous Motherhood Monday posts, and more about pregnancy

(All photos from Sharon)

  1. Lowe are firmly entrenched at Sterling Cooper, but there isn’t nearly the sense of disorientation we got when we came in on season two and 15 months had passed since Don’s pitch to the Kodak people. Mens Rings

  2. Joanna, thanks for sharing this. The father’s side is so often given short shrift or made the butt of jokes. I wrote my (2) stories when I realized the 2 births were so different and that being a father with a good attitude makes all the difference.

    http://www.amazon.com/Times-Two-Memoir-Births/dp/1480257842

    xoxoxo

    Roger

  3. in the cube crying….
    This is so touching

  4. love this! as a doula, sometimes my job is more about supporting the dad and helping him to be an effective coach. i just love birth stories from the perspective of the father. i always want to know what’s going on in their minds during delivery!

  5. hi joanna-
    i like the Q&A style birth story you put together. great story! my husband just shared our daughters birth story on my blog.
    http://kotoamade.blogspot.com/

    we are celebrating her second birthday today. it has been fun to look back at that day. i had a natural birth but it was still a blur in my mind- i went without sleep for a few days, and i was a bit loopy. i can now remember through his story. :)

  6. Claire says...

    What a lovely story! Thanks for sharing. So sweet and funny.

  7. i loved reading this.

  8. Absolutely adorable story. I love it!

  9. Lara says...

    Adorable! Made me cry and laugh. Thanks for sharing!

  10. Anonymous says...

    I love these birth stories. It makes it all so real and grounded. Thank-you.

  11. Loved this post! So nice to get a daddy’s perspective.

  12. Chelsea says...

    laughing, crying, goosebumps…Rob, you are a fabulous story teller :)

  13. So sweet and funny, Sharon and Rob make some rad babies!

  14. we are expecting our third baby (!!!) any day now, I read this out loud to my husband and we were both cracking up, thanks for sharing!

  15. Glad to hear his comment about not having more than $300 in the bank, because that’s so open and honest and heartfelt-something I know my husband and I are most concerned about. We are waiting to have a baby when we have more money, but, knowing other sane decent people have children without having a ton of dough saved up and still live to feed them is a reassuring thought! Thanks for sharing the honesty!

  16. @amynicole: ha YES!!! you know it: Kahuku Hospital. I don’t even think they deliver babies anymore. haha

  17. oh wow! look at all these comments!

    i finally had a chance to see this post after all my halloween shenanigans. yesterday was wild. it was such nice surprise to see this today! thanks for all your nice feedback. it was fun to revisit that day through my husband’s eyes.

    thanks for including rob’s story joanna!!

  18. This is amazing! I love hearing these fathers’ point of view stories, so touching, so honest, and real, it’s just so heart-warming! Thanks to both of you for sharing!

    http://nomadic-d.blogspot.com/

  19. ohmygoodness! that was so funny and heart warming! the “stop hoo-ing” part made me laugh out loud! my husband had banana breath and couldn’t remember any of our breathing exercises so he was basically hyperventilating his banana breath all over me until i had to “ask” him to stop. :)

  20. This is so hilarious–even better because I follow Sharon’s blog. Ella might have a worm tongue, but she’s a little beauty!

  21. “Ella just has a worm tongue like me.” I DIED laughing! These must be really fun friends to hang out with, Joanna!

  22. how exciting to hear that a few of you are expecting sweet babies–huge congratulations!!! xoxo

  23. I love the daddy/daughter worm tongue! Hilarious!

  24. Aw! I love the part about being too choked up to say “Look at my girls…” So sweet.

    I also literally laughed out loud when he says it looks like Sharon was going to give birth to a puppy….. and was relieved to see a baby. ha =)

    P.S. Ella is absolutely gorgeous! Rob is gonna have his hands full ;)

  25. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I’m 10 weeks pregnant, but that story brought tears to my eyes. The part about how he felt hopeful, that Ella could be or do anything….so beautiful. And my husband is definitely getting his experience with hormones so I won’t be surprised if we have our own “tongue” moment!

  26. this was such an awesome story – the tongue stuff cracked me up! ella is quite a beauty now too. :)

  27. A wonderful read. I enjoyed it so much!

  28. Aww, thanks for sharing this, Joanna! This totally made my day. We are so used to asking the mama about her experience, but a dad’s experience is just as important and it’s so fun to see how it is from their perspective. Always so honest, vulnerable, funny and lovely all at the same time! Please keep them coming!!!

  29. That was lovely! It’s always nice to hear the dad’s point of view. I know they often think “Gross!” because I think that too, but I like hearing the sweet stuff. :)

  30. “Why are we naming her Ella?” hahaha I am dying over this. Loved hearing his perspective!

  31. i love this! i cannot get over his sweet thoughts about hoping she has her mother’s smile and eyes.

  32. Joanna Goddard says...

    omg, kate, i love that, it made me laugh out loud. haha, i love that so much :)

  33. Great story! Its always nice to hear the story from the dad’s point of view. Thanks for sharing!

  34. Anonymous says...

    Rob – You’re awesome. That is the best post ever. Totally made me smile.

  35. Anonymous says...

    Great story and really beautiful little girl!

  36. What a sweet birth story! And how lucky Ella is-twin brothers!

    My dad was sick just before I was born and passed out at one point while my mom was in labor–suddenly the doctors were more concerned about him than about her! But he recovered just fine and all the attention went right back to mother and baby…we still like to laugh about it, though.

  37. So sweet. I love reading these. I think of my own dad and the great relationship we have — he told my birth story at my wedding! But mostly I think of my husband. We don’t have kids yet and while he’s not especially expressive, I just can’t wait to see what his reaction will be like. I get teary just thinking about it! :)

  38. Great story, thanks for having your friend share it with us.

  39. “She had long black hair and for a few minutes it looked like Sharon was going to give birth to a puppy.” This made me laugh out loud and scare my sleeping cats.

  40. What a wonderful story! In equal parts heartwarming and hilarious :)

  41. such a touching story!

    Happy Halloween!

  42. He is hilariously sweet. What a fun perspective to read about. My husband and I just moved from North Shore and if they delivered at the hospital we know, they are lucky to have lived to tell the tale :) Just some fun island humor :)

  43. I loved this! I can’t wait to hear about what my husband’s experience would be in the very near future. :)

  44. i just read and sent to my husband as well, we’re expecting a little on in janruary. so funny and sweet at the same time.

  45. claire-elisa says...

    When males write from there point of view it always makes me laugh and cry, I think its because we want to know what our own husbands are thinking and we never know, so we read these stories as if it was our own husband’s story.

  46. Anonymous says...

    Love his stream of consciousness during the birth!

  47. Love this! So funny and touching – “look at my girls!” love that part.

  48. How touching! I have such a soft spot for new dads … like they’re experiencing more happiness than they what to do with!

  49. I seriously giggle/snorted @ “and pretended to read What to Expect When You’re Expecting”

    It kinda hurt, but it was all worth it. Great story!!

  50. i am 21 weeks and just found out we are having a girl, so i was soo into this story! hilarious!

  51. When my dad dropped me off halfway across the country for college we were both crying and he said “I’ve loved you from the minute you were born and I thought you didn’t have a face, and I thought to myself I’ll still love her even if she doesn’t have a face.” because apparently when I came out my head was turned away from him and this was his very first thought. This story reminds me of that! It’s hard to imagine how freaked out the dads must be – they just have to stand there and watch!

  52. I love this! I especially love those last few photos of Ella with her brothers! So precious! What a beautiful, little bunch! :) Thanks for sharing this story! :)

  53. So sweet, I totally cried. I am six weeks away from my due date and I can’t wait. Thanks Joanna, I’m excited to read more posts.

  54. Glenda says...

    what an adorable story.
    love to hear about the twins :)
    thanks for sharing

  55. My little girl is asking, why are you crying and laughing? Are you choking or does something tickle?

    Thank you for the happy tickle tears today!

  56. Anonymous says...

    What a sweetie! Just gorgeous

  57. Oh I LOVE these dad’s points of view! Makes me want to ask my dad how he felt when I was born :)

    The part where he said he tried to say, “Look at my girls” but couldn’t because he was crying made me cry too. What a beautiful thing!

    Thanks for this story, Joanna! You made my day :)

  58. I love reading a guy’s perspective on their child’s birth. I guess I usually think since they’re not the ones actually giving birth they don’t all have their own story to tell, but I’m always pleasantly surprised to be wrong :)

  59. what a sweet story to share. you can feel the real emotion, he sounds so sincere…and funny!

  60. oh my gosh, what a sweet father (and hilarious, too!) the tongue part had me cracking up. and his stream of consciousness.

  61. This is the happiest thing I’ve read all day. So sweet to hear a new dad’s thoughts. :)

    Callie @ A Chance To Die

  62. Would love to hear the twins’ birth story from his POV too.

    Love that they have father/daughter tongues…that’s too cute.

  63. Thank you for sharing this! It seriously made my morning :)

  64. yes, he is the funniest! sharon is too:)

  65. I just emailed this to my husband, in preparation for our son’s birth. This is the funniest, and probably most honest account of labor from a man’s point of view. Love how annoyed Sharon was at his worm tongue (TOTALLY something that would bother me) and his relief she was not giving birth to a puppy (this is what my husband would be thinking, too!). Love this, thank you!

  66. wonderful story! made me laugh and cry. . . thanks for sharing – i love hearing daddies point of views!