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I once found a rotten banana peel in my car that could crack in half. By the wonderful Grace Farris.
P.S. How playgrounds work and hiking with kids.
Mom’s Bag of Surprises
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the lollipop!!! i feel so seen. and have two stashed in there right now… it’s been about 6 months lol
Thank goodness! I thought I was the only one who had a fossilized clementine in my bag! What about an apple that has been in there so long that it should be mushy, but somehow it’s pristine?
That’s all? very suprising! ;-)
all of these!! especially the clementine lol so perfect
reminds me of this perfect post from the funny/real/great jennifer garner showing her unpacking her bag of surprises after a road trip with three kids. to conclude, she eats found m&ms from the bottom of the bag with a found disposable fork: https://www.instagram.com/p/ClhETxdAwLz/
I’ve been a tote girl for over a decade, because you never know when you might need all the things! However, I’ve become a bit more intentional with the contents of said totes after an incident years ago. Next time you think you smell something burning in your bag, you’re not crazy – it is quite possible that there just might be an earring and a random piece of popcorn melting into the end of a 9v battery hot enough to burn your fingers….
The fossilized clementine is so so real! I pull them out of my daughter’s swim bag all the time, too. And like another commenter, the napkins on napkins make me feel seeeeeeen.
One soccer shin pad, fossilized candy,too many hair ties, a small paper daily diary with the front cover bent and ripped and that I never recorded a single appointment in , half a roll of tums, assorted coins from foreign trips over several years and half a dozen pens and highlighters none of which work! Plus always that widget of napkins!
LOL. Truth! I probably have a fossilized clementine in every shoulder bag I own. I thought I was the only one who did this until now.
Literally tossed clementine in that exact state from my backpack into the compost, then sat down to read Cup of Jo. HOW do you do that??
YES! This is so me. Minus the lollipop b/c kid is not old enough yet. Also, always, ALWAYS sand on the bottom of the backpack. No idea where it comes from.
Once you have a kid, the sand generates itself. It defies physics and logic, like children in general.
“The sand generates itself” ah ah why is that??!
hahaha!
I’m not a bag person, so it’s all in my pockets. In fact, my (childless) coworkers liked to play “What’s in Erin’s pockets?” on Monday mornings when my kids were small. Lego minifigs, dentist stickers, game pieces, food folded into paper napkins, kazoo, a single sock… you never knew what would be in there!
I bought myself a reasonably fancy (not second-mortgage fancy) handbag for my birthday. The inside is a nice pale grey colour. I opened a candy bar, ate a little, put it in the handbag. A few hours later- surprise! A melty puddle of chocolate at the bottom of my nice new bag. It was England in March, not warm enough to melt chocolate… or so I thought. Doh.
Yessssssssssss! + Band-aids and several lip balm options :P
The napkins! I feel seen! Also, extra socks. So.many.crumbs. Pebbles and sticks, carefully collected.
A wrapped cookie fell out of my bag at work.
Me: Oops, that’s my emergency cookie.
Colleague: Oh, do you have kids?
Me: …yes, but it’s MY emergency cookie.
Lol
goldfish dust
leaves
seashells from a 2021 that now smell absolutely vile
Pacifiers (either several or none at all, of course when needed the most), used cloth hankies, a toy the kids got at the dentist‘s, a piece of art made in kindergarten, sand at the bottom.
Petrified cough drops, mummified tissue, and the what’s that from.
So many things, but the worst was totally me, not my kids. I went out for Pho and didn’t use the fresh basil in my soup. I hate to waste, so I wrapped it in a napkin and put it in my purse. Sometime later, possibly weeks, I thought I was hallucinating that I could smell pizza every time I opened my purse. After a few days of that, I took a minute to investigate and found a tablespoon of dried basil flakes at the bottom of my purse.
Hahah! Several years ago: I was mortified to discover that the source of a mysterious odour I had complained about was actually coming from my own bag- a black, fizzing, mushy-juicy banana. In the words of Barney from the Simpsons (when he held a sweet little baby, expecting it was time for a diaper change), “Someone’s stinky. Oh…. It’s me” 😝😖🤭
Uno. Sunscreen. Pencils. Chapstick. Small pad of paper.
This is probably the best group to ask for this rec: a cute, fun (maybe a bright color?) bag that isn’t a diaper bag but has some sort of pocket for a kids’ water bottle. I’m over my diaper-bag backpack and want something smaller, but I don’t want a leaky bottle floating around!
Get a regular backpack, not meant as a diaper bag. My favourite brand is Topo – a great range of colours, rugged and supportive for your back.
I absolutely love this canvas tote from target, which has a spot for my coffee AND water bottle, and has held up great as my work bag (w heavy laptop; daily use)for a long time: https://www.target.com/p/campus-tote-handbag-universal-thread/-/A-85123253
Lands End has some cute canvas totes of various sizes. Mine has exactly the contents Grace mentions above plus one each of all the wrong size diapers, AND an interior and exterior pocket.
Things I have found in my bag: many decrepit grocery lists, a little plastic container of Cheerios, a superhero cape (my son went through a phase in preschool where he wore his capes everywhere), tiny bottle of cucumber-scented hand sanitizer, random bits of glitter that came off someone’s art project.
Accidentally unwrapped bandaids. Barrettes. Many chapsticks.
But HOW DO THE BANDAIDS GET UNWRAPPED? I’m always amazed and annoyed.
fat stack of paper napkins from fast food restaurant
random toy from birthday party goody bag
errant crunchy snack specimen
dead leaves and pine needles
“Dead leaves and the dirty ground
when I know you’re not around.
Shiny tops and soda pops
when I hear your lips make a sound”
sorry, couldn’t help but repeat great Jack White lyrics ;)
I once found a bottle of wine in my bag, a “capricious tote” in the spirit of a recent episode of Succession. It had been there for at least a week from my book club meeting, nestled amongst my just-in-case
napkins and fruit leathers, waiting to be discovered like a heavy glass Easter egg. I still don’t know how I didn’t notice the weight of that entire bottle of wine for upwards of a week!
I know you meant “capacious” tote but love the idea of a capricious tote – you never know what you might find in that saucy bag!
Hannah/Cat, I love all of this. ROFL!
Ha, Ha! Thanks Cat & Hannah for the laugh- I have yet to watch Succession (I swear I don’t live under a rock!) and was so confused when I first read this, but then figured it was some major reference to the show
Recents finds: three metal spoons (how?), a small car, a pacifier, two dirty facemasks, and about a dozen crumbling small peanut butter crackers leaving a fine dust on the bottom of the bag.
Haha, I find metal spoons in all of my bags too!
😳I accidentally read ‘a small car’ as ‘a small CAT’! 🤣
Fossilized clementine? Lol. I’ve got one now.
We always have such high hopes for the clementine :)
Oh my gosh, I can smell that clementine right now 🥴
I over two lipsticks I never wear anyways and half the baby snack shelf from my store. I’m always scared someone is gonna accuse me of stealing because it’s so much.
Relatable! I found a clementine turning blue in a snack bag this week🙃 Happy weekend!
Who told you that you could look in my purse!!!!
There will come a day when I don’t have a leaking child’s water bottle in my bag, but that day is not today.
Haha! SAME
Hair bands and half-peeled band aids.
Lololol just posted the same 😅💀
A day when I reach into my work bag and don’t pull out a handful of cheerios is a parenting win in my book.
Listen, some bags like to make their own trail mix.
Brilliant comment, Lauren! You made my Friday!
Lauren, you are hilarious…
Fossilized clementine!!! I feel seen! Just a few weeks ago I dug out my Bean boots for a muddy community garden day and when my foot didn’t fit…out rolled a fossilized clementine. While it’s a handy fruit to have around kids they certainly end up in the darndest places.
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