1. Maria Anagnostopoulou says...

    The worst of all is I cant hug my son. We dont live togeher, we see each other but he forbids me the hugs because he is afraid for me. (I am 70)

  2. coco says...

    I haven’t seen anyone I know since March 12. I live alone, with furry friends, fortunately, but I wonder when I’ll see someone again. I’ve had friends offer physically distanced meet ups, but I feel like my isolation + limited outings mean I have far less exposure… so why chance it?

  3. I can really relate to wishing I had plans to cancel. So funny and sadly all of these are so true.

  4. Nigerian Girl says...

    Remembering hugs. Tell me about it.

  5. Haha, wishing there were plans to cancel and realising I’m not as much of a homebody as I thought I was sounds a lot like me! In Malaysia, the lockdown has eased a lot now and many of us have gone back to work. So, I guess my wish of having plans to cancel can come true; though, it is ironic that a homebody like me now wishes there ARE plans to follow up with! Hope you are doing well there!

  6. Terri says...

    Remembering hugs indeed!
    I live alone, and I think my last hug was in February. It really does suck. But if I have to choose between no hugs and getting sick or making someone else sick, I’ll choose no hugs. But it’s still difficult.

    • Melanie says...

      My last hug was in March. It sucks. Obviously nothing I can say will make it better, but just wanted you to know you’re not alone.

  7. Danielle says...

    Missing hugs… I was touched in affection for the first time in five months last week, as it’s the leaving season for medical folks. Three hugs from three friends as they leave to start new adventures. I don’t remember what it feels like to cuddle another person. Thank God for my puppy, who loves morning snuggles.

  8. mg says...

    Up in Canada our numbers are much, much lower, but the government is asking we still maintain social distancing, and wears masks when not able which seems very reasonable. It’s incredibly frustrating to watch friends and family on facebook and other social media sites post “stay safe” and all sorts of other nonsense (I say nonsense because of my next comment) and then on the next thread show pictures of themselves with groups of people sitting together no where near even 1 foot apart drinking and sharing food without masks like everything is back to “normal”. It’s more unnerving trying to find a balance of what’s appropriate NOW then when it was just lockdown for us. The virus hasn’t gone away and yet people are behaving as though it is. I’m prone to maintain distancing and wear a mask in public out of respect for people that are more susceptible. I’m finding this part of the “reopening” far scarier and uncertain than 2 months ago. I don’t know if anyone else is experiencing this as well ?.

    • megs283 says...

      MG, I agree. My four year old was invited to her close friend’s birthday party, and I’m coming to terms with the fact that I have to say no. :-(

      What also sucks is that I feel like a hypocrite. I spend time with some family (aunts, uncles, cousins) without masks. I guess we all have to draw the line somewhere, and that’s mine…

    • Yvonne says...

      Hello Mg, I live in Canada also and like you I find it very frustrating to see people total disregard for others. People not wearing masks or not following safe distancing are showing great disrespect to those who have lost everything. I have been sheltering in place since March 11 and I will continue to do so because of health issues and also because of the disregard of others. It’s very stressful. I wish everyone would show respect like you do. We need more responsible people like you. Sorry about ranting but it’s a very sensitive issue for me.

    • Kevin Jacobsen says...

      Yes. It seems that there is no virus at all. I think that it is a shame 5hat people are doing this. It makes others less cautious. If you see a group not following the rules, it makes you relax as well. Almost a set up to get sick.

    • nadine says...

      Hi MG. I’m in Montreal and I am finding it really hard too. I am not working in an essential job and I was able to socially distantiate staying and working from home with my boyfriend and our little cat. But now I find it really hard to navigate what to do next.
      I haven’t talked to anyone in person besides my boyfriend and a few balcony to balcony chats with my neighbours. It’s weird, one side of me thinks i’m not ready, another one is thinking whether is it just me so concerned? How to even start?
      Of course this is futile compared to many communities still deeply affected by the virus. :(

  9. Hugs for sure.
    I dream about them.

  10. Lucy Kalanithi says...

    Remembering hugs!!!!!!

  11. maywyn says...

    After seeing on the news so many people not keeping a safe distance, the joy of being able to get out and about without feeling like a military exercise in a combat zone is gone.

  12. Bridget says...

    Grace, after reading about your kids being with your mother-in-law, I’ve frequently wondered if they are back with you and how long they were gone. That had to be so very hard…but how wonderful to have “Grandma” close by with what sounds like a wonderful place to quarantine.

    • Grace Farris says...

      Yes, they are back! Thanks for asking! They were gone for 2 months. It was very *helpful* to have my mother-in-law watch them. I’ll leave it at that ;)

  13. Daniela says...

    I had to double check that it wasn’t Friday several times when I saw this! Cup of Jo is like my calender, ha!

  14. Mary A. says...

    I am planning to bring my small children for a picnic with my 74-year old parents tomorrow and my anxiety about it is almost overwhelming. Despite my yearning to see my parents and have them visit with (maybe even squeeze?) their grandchildren, is this the responsible thing to do? Our kids have been out of day care since March and we have been doing a pretty good job of social distancing, but if they or my babies got sick I could never forgive myself.

    • Hannah says...

      I totally hear you and you’re not alone. It’s exhausting for every decision to feel like a moral dilemma with life or death consequences. I wish we had any clear answers. Try to have grace with yourself – you’re weighing a lot of factors and it’s clear that you care immensely about your family <3

    • Shirley G says...

      Hi Mary, We will be seeing my inlaws this week after 3.5 months of being extremely careful. I live in VA and have seen many neighbors have their parents stay with them in their homes this week after we approached/reached phase 3. I am a mental health counselor and I feel that we can only do our best- as long as you have been careful and both parties are willing, I do not see a reunion as something bad. In fact, for our mental health, I think we desperately need this contact. No one can predict the future and as long as you have not been running around in crowds without a mask on, I say, enjoy the moment when you reunite. I’m not sure how old your children are, but I know for a fact that my children are craving and needing outside contact with people other than their parents. It sounds like you have made your decision to get together- remind yourself that you are doing the best you can, both parties are willing, and be mindful while enjoying the reunion. We will be doing the same!

    • Jas says...

      Mary, I would kindly suggest putting things in perspective. Covid is a sickness, just like any other. Just like with cancer, heart attack, stroke – we are all healthy until we are not. But we do not live our lives in expectations to get sick, such life would not be possible. And with Covid, chances are pretty, pretty high to just go through it with no symptoms or with a milder form. Even older folks with decent immunity have very high chances of going through it without consequences. Isolation and not seeing loved ones can have a much greater harm on people’s psyche in the long run. All this to say – if everyone is healthy, things should be just fine, don’t worry! Go see your parents!

    • K says...

      If both parties have been strictly quarantining that would give me some comfort about the safety of it. I agree, the constant weighing of decisions is mentally hard! Some friends of mine have taken a Covid test just to make sure they are negative (and then quarantining until they get the results and meet up with others) before meeting with others. I thought that was a good solution to make sure both parties are negative because I too would not forgive myself if my family or the other party got sick. Sure, a lot of people get the sickness mildly but some don’t (and we don’t know who those people are!) and even if they survive, I’ve heard of lasting negative health effects. What makes this different than other sickness is that it is a new disease for which we don’t know who it affects, have a vaccine, or established treatment for…yet. by meeting up “if everyone is healthy” (if that wasn’t implied that is. My apologies if not), I would add that people make sure by taking a test or strictly quarantining for 2 weeks beforehand because some people can be asymptomatic and spread it and that is how it often does spread. There’s a reason for the guidelines because it can severely affect some people. it’s not good to live paralyzed in fear but there’s a fine line between being wisely cautious and overly fearful – one I am trying to navigate too.

    • K says...

      Regarding how with other sicknesses we are all healthy until we are not…but if we know there are ways to best avoid it, we would try our best, right? I hope…

  15. Bethany says...

    I am such a homebody, but I miss seeing people out and about, and thinking about them. I am so tired of just seeing my neighbors walking their dog 3x a day or the elderly couple across the way do their endless loop of our one rural block. (Our neighbors are lovely btw.) So, when we drove our son back to Chicago this week, after having quarantined with us for 3 1/2 months, the most glorious thing was snagging an outside table at a coffee shop near his apartment at 7:00 a.m. the next morning to watch all the folks running or walking their dogs or leaving for work, all masked of course, and socially distanced. It felt like we were on vacation and I think we probably looked weird, sitting there, smiling at everyone, hoping that a dog would want to meet us.

  16. Sarah says...

    Always interesting to read these when here in the South no one is distancing anymore. Not saying it’s right – just saying it’s happening. Interesting how different NYC is from many other parts of the of the country as everyone up there is still taking it so seriously while in the likes of SC, GA and NC (where I am) it’s pretty much business and socialization as usual. Again, certainly not trying to start a debate on whether or not this is wrong – simply pointing out how fascinating it is (to me at least) how the different regions of the country are experiencing this pandemic so completely opposite each other.

    • George says...

      Those of us in Europe are seriously scratching our heads about how in the US, measures to protect individuals from a highly infectious virus are politicised to the extent that you feel unable here to advocate for social distancing.

    • C says...

      I live in GA and am still distancing! As are most of my friends and family members. Our family is only seeing friends from a distance outside. I wish everyone here was still taking it seriously so that we could have the same success driving down the numbers that NYC has!

    • Sarah says...

      Here in California, the variation is almost neighborhood-by-neighborhood! Our guidelines are county-by-county, so it’s interesting to see people’s different reactions/adherence to masks and distancing.

    • Marguerite Sheffer says...

      The south isn’t all the same! New Orleans is taking this extremely seriously–masks everywhere. (wish I could say the same for the rest of Louisiana).

    • SG says...

      As Marguerite said, the South is not monolithic. We are still social distancing and wearing masks in my corner of the South.

    • Caitlin says...

      My family is still strictly social distancing in NC! I second C in wishing folks would take it more seriously here.

    • Erin says...

      It’s utterly tragic to see how cases are spiking all across the South right now.

    • Sarah says...

      Ok my apologies, I shouldn’t have said “no one” – but seriously it’s a different world here vs what I’m reading about NYC here and on other NYC area-based blogs. I find it so fascinating that the majority of people in NYC are honestly still keeping up with it…Really no hugs, no visits with groups of friends less than 6 feet apart, truly staying home alone most of the time? I think it’s wonderful (if it’s true) – but it’s also unconscionable to me because yes…YOU may live in the South and be distancing…but it’s a fact that the majority of people here are not distancing at all. Good on you for doing it if you are, but I personally don’t know a single soul that hasn’t been social outside of the restrictions, or who has been forced to go back to work, unable to distance, once the restrictions were lifted. I just think the regional differences are fascinating.

    • K says...

      For me it is sad. In my area of CA people are 50/50 on social distancing and masks, but also in my area, cases are high compared to elsewhere (although not yet as high as it was in NY). I think one reason I am stricter about it is that I know someone who passed away from it, and everyone I know in NYC has known someone personally who has lost someone to Covid. I was talking to a friend who lives there and she says that that may be the reason people are reacting differently…they’ve lived through it, they’ve seen the bad outcomes, they know someone who died or were severely sick (and yes you may get over it but I heard there can be detrimental health effects afterwards) and they don’t want more deaths or sickness. It is sad that sometimes it takes knowing someone personally to be able to take it seriously and realize that these social distancing guidelines are being recommended for a reason – because they work and a lot of people are still dying because people aren’t following them. Different regions may be experiencing and reacting differently, but I think it’s only a matter of time that the outcome will be similar (lots of positive cases) if they don’t follow the social distancing guidelines.

    • Tara says...

      Sarah, all I ask is for you to revisit your comment in 2-3 months time and see what behaviour you view as unconscionable.

    • Andrea says...

      Sarah I live in NYC and hope no other part of the country has to go through what we did. There were 1000 deaths on some days (750 official and 300 more suspected of cardiac deaths in the home). I was working with a constant stream of ambulance sirens.

      I say I hope no other part of the country has to endure this, but I see the news and photos of people packing casinos and bars and I just want to cry. The rest of the country watched what happened and didn’t learn from it. NYC was taken off guard, but you all have ample warning.

  17. Meg says...

    Word. I’m 38 years old and miss hugging my mom and dad so badly. I never ever would have anticipated that would be one of the worst parts of all this. I’ll never take it for granted again!

  18. Ha traipsing through drugstores made me laugh. I didn’t realize how therapeutic picking out lipgloss was until it was gone!

    • Emily says...

      Same! I desperately want to browse nail polish

    • Poppy says...

      Agreed, it is a highly underrated therapeutic exercise! ?

  19. Kate says...

    I got my hair cut this week and when my hairdresser started washing my hair, I realized she’s pretty much the first human who has touched me other than my husband since March! It felt so odd for a moment until I realized that. I miss hugging everyone.

    • Kate 2 says...

      Same! Oh man when we’re allowed to hug again everyone is getting the longest most awkward hug from me :)

    • Sarah P says...

      haha I just got my haircut last weekend (wearing a mask, of course) and had the same thought while my hairdresser was washing my hair.