1. “Showing me the wine label before pouring, ooh fancy” this one killed me hahahahah!! As a 22 year old who knows little about wine (despite having lived in both Italy and France… it’s a disgrace, I know) I find this hilarious.

  2. I was in South Carolina on a family vacation and two very kind and polite southern boys came up to me after a game of baseball with my two boys to return the ball. They both said ‘thank you ma’am’ and ‘yes ma’am’ when I asked them a question. Not one part of me felt old by this (I am 35). I thought it was darling!

  3. Jess. says...

    I must say, as a 41-year-old with two kids who are often with me, it makes me a little annoyed when people call me “Miss” these days. I’ve earned Ma’am! You call me Ma’am, you little whippersnappers!

  4. Kate says...

    As a lady in the beverage business, we show the label to guests before opening the wine to make sure it’s the correct bottle! It happens all the time… “I’ll get a bottle of pinot!” or (randomly points to list in small type) and then when we start pouring (or even worse, even they get the bill), whups. Not *that* pinot!! :)

  5. Lily says...

    Laughed at the wine bottle, thinking of the obligatory nod and “oh yes great thank you” each time, as I pretend that I remember and recognize what I ordered.

    But I do appreciate when waiters show the bottle to me after I order it, and not just to my male dinner companion – amazingly, this doesn’t always happen. (Worse, so often when I hand a waiter my credit card to pay for dinner, the check is handed back to my date instead of to me.)

    Another Southerner here, and my boss, a few decades older than me, calls me ma’am. :)

  6. ceciel says...

    I haven’t posted on Mari Andrew’s illustrations yet but I so enjoy them! I browse through the Friday round up and am always excited to keep scrolling to see what truth (plus witty analysis) Mari has put together. Thank you!

  7. Savannah says...

    My family likes to tell me how tired I look. I have a chronic illness. No matter how many times I tell them it’s related to the chronic illness, they still tell me how tired I look.

    • Julie says...

      My mother in law tells me this ALL THE TIME. I have even responded saying, “I think that’s just the way I look” or “Of course I’m tired, I have two small children and work a full time job, but please don’t remind me that I look so tired because there isn’t much I can do about it” Ugh. Makes me so frustrated. My husband has even stepped in and told her that it’s not very nice and doesn’t help anything! So unnecessary!

  8. Hahaha, the wine thing is so true and funny :) Who needs a label when you love wine, not me that’s for sure!!

    Have a great weekend :)

    Chloe

  9. B says...

    Awww I love being called ma’am! I take it as a sign of respect :)

    But LOL at the wine label! Hahaha I never have any idea what I’m looking at ?

  10. Nicole says...

    So true on the wine bottle label, it’s like ‘cool, thanks, can you pour already?’

    • My sentiments exactly! :D

  11. Megan L. says...

    I used to be intimidated by wine presentation at restaurants until I broke it down: Does the label have the name of the wine I ordered? Cool. Does it taste corked or otherwise bad? Nope! WINE TIME.

  12. Kiley says...

    Definitely “you look sick” or “you look tired”. Those comments normally come on the days I don’t wear makeup :(

    • Emily says...

      Yes! I didn’t wear make-up to work one day and three people commented on how “tired” I looked. I wasn’t.

    • Anna says...

      Ugh yes! I’m in graduate school– of course I am tired! Yet, I have this one classmate who alllllways tells me “you look tired today”// read “you look gross today”.

    • Recently someone said that to me on a day that I actually felt pretty peppy. Not sure if I was in denial or my friend was projecting onto me!! THANKS either way! :s

  13. Jo says...

    I’ve always liked being called ‘Ma’am’, especially by men. It feels like they are being respectful and courteous.

    To add an item to this list: when people ominously say “if u thought your kid is a handful now, wait till he grows up”. I mean, I get the teenager years could be hard and challenging, but when I crib about how my 5-yo is driving me nuts, I am expecting a chuckle or a tip to make it better. not a negative spin. Grr!

    • “The chronic illness your child has is Really Rare. Very unusual to see in a child this young. Normally you see this in very old old people. The elderly. BUT: if he wears this brace- then no kid will wAnt to come near him: which is what we want. To. You know. Protect him.” Said several times by Experts, to you, as your stunned child sits six inches from you, listening.

  14. Why girls don’t like “MA’AM”? It is a word to show respect to girls of all ages.

    • Amy says...

      It can feel patronizing.

  15. Lexy says...

    As a Midwesterner who has lived in the South for nearly ten years, the word ma’am used to make me feel old and yucky. But after being in the South for so long, I love it! Calling someone ma’am is a marker of manners, respect, and being conscientious. In the South, any woman over the age of 18 is referred to as ma’am. To me, I really feel like the use of ma’am is inclusive language (a true equal to sir), and not at all unnecessary. I feel like maybe we bring our own baggage to the word if we’re uncomfortable with appearing older than we are or navigating the relationship between a customer and a worker in a service industry.

  16. Lisa says...

    I always thought the intent behind showing the customer the wine label before pouring is to ensure the customer is receiving the correct wine/vintage that was ordered!

  17. Andrea says...

    Ma’am is a necessary evil when you don’t know someone. Calling people Miss seems worse.

  18. Sarah says...

    This is definitely the best illustration so far! Love it! :)

  19. Alexandra says...

    Too many lotion samples? If you do, please donate your travel-sized and sample cosmetics and toothpastes to your local homeless shelter, they are very grateful for that.

  20. Gen says...

    Haha yes completely agree with all of those. Except the last one about wine, not so much about the label itself, but I love knowing about every single wine I taste!

  21. Carrie says...

    I doubt that anyone actually truly feels offended at the word ma’am. I tease that it makes me feel old too, but in truth it’s just a polite way of getting someone’s attention

  22. I am not totally against being called “ma’am” but the only problem is, I don’t think of myself as a “ma’am”. Anytime someone has called me that I haven’t paid any attention because they can’t possibly referring to me, can they? Most recent example: we left the grocery store and forgot our receipt, the cashier came running after us all, “ma’am, your receipt!” and my fiancé nudged me and I was like what? I heard the cashier loud and clear but it didn’t occur to me that I was the “ma’am” he was referring to! I honestly think I’m more likely to turn around if I hear “Hey” than “ma’am” hahah

  23. Megan says...

    “You have your hands full” when I’m running errands with my two little boys who are well behaved but there is two of them. And they are little. And they are boys. Something about hearing that from strangers always feels unnecessary and a little insulting.

    • Amy says...

      Depending on how cheesy you feel, you can reply, “yes, and my heart’s even fuller!” Or you could try the “yes, thanks for offering to help!” or “yes, could you please help me get __(through the door, that box from the shelf, entertain this child while I read this ingredient list)__?” tactic. That generally either spooks them off, gains you a pair of genuinely helpful hands, or makes an awkward enough situation that they’re unlikely to drop that line on the next person. You’ve gotta be brave to do that one though ;) PS I have three. On my wishlist is a tote bag that says “yes, they’re all mine!”

  24. Molly Simmons says...

    Unnecessary:
    “Wow–You look tired!”

    Or when our newborn is crying and my husband looks at me and says, “I think he’s hungry.” The only thing ONLY I CAN FIX right now.

    • Laura says...

      Such a challenging time!! The well-meaning commenters aren’t helpful…

  25. Anne says...

    I get that ma’am feels old to some people, but there’s not really a better alternative! I work in a bar and if I need to catch a man’s attention, like if he left something behind, I can say, “Excuse me, sir!” But if it’s a woman, there’s nothing I can say that doesn’t feel disrespectful. Miss? Childish. Honey? Condescending and overly familiar. If anyone has a better idea, I would LOVE to know!

    Besides all of that, ‘sir’ is a term of respect that implies a certain degree of status. The female equivalent of ‘sir’ is ‘ma’am.’ Why would I not use the term that acknowledges my female patrons’ status? It’s crazy to me that women who otherwise own their badassery would balk at being called ‘ma’am.’

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      so fascinating and such a great point, anne!

    • Ellen says...

      Ha, I actually love a good “ma’am.” I mean, I’d be open to Boss Lady or Her Royal Bossness but neither has caught on yet…

    • Laura C. says...

      I agree. English is not my first language but I like ma’am, it’s kind of elegant and polite and respectful. Otherwise what would you say? Milady?

    • Kate says...

      “Her Royal Bossness” hahaha

    • Sadhbh says...

      Why do you have to say anything at all? We don’t really use any titles like that in Ireland.

      Also, what about misgendering someone?

  26. S says...

    Are u tired or you look tired.
    Grrrr. Hate that

  27. Ellen W says...

    As a 39 yr old woman who has lived most of my life in the South (Texas & North Carolina), the word ma’am doesn’t have a negative connotation to me at all. Kids are taught to say “yes ma’am” and “no ma’am” as a sign of respect. I’ve said it to women younger than me.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      that’s so interesting, ellen!

  28. Nicole says...

    Like friends/family ending a watsapp message with their name :) :)

  29. Elizabeth says...

    Haha these are so great! The sunburn one reminds me of my dad! He used to always point out to my sister and me “you have a blemish” when we had breakouts, but so innocently like he was surprised and thought he was actually helping. My sister would get so mad, like thanks Dad, I didn’t already see it STARING back at me in the mirror this morning. Now the memory just makes us both laugh.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      hahahahaha

    • Jen says...

      Mari’s illustrations are always so clever and funny, but I especially love this one!

  30. Jessie says...

    The wine label! I never have a clue…. and yet I nod in approval.

  31. I hate ma’am! I’m from the South, so I get that it’s a “cultural thing” but I wish it could just stop being one. Being called ma’am as a college student (especially) is not cool! Lol.

    Briana | youngsophisticate.com

  32. Mari’s illustrations are always great to see on Friday mornings! There are so many things we could add to this I’m sure. The first one that comes to mind is when my friends send me pictures of the tooth their kid lost. Ew! Not necessary. A gap grinning child picture will do.

    I lived in the south for a few years and one day admonished the pizza delivery man for calling me ma’am. He said, “Oh, I’m sorry, that’s the way I was raised.” It was a good reminder that there is often a reason people do and say things. Sometimes, I should let them go. It’s not all about me! :)

    • Emma says...

      I appreciate this! That’s the way I was raised too and I never thought twice about it until I moved away from home and then it started stressing me out because I suddenly had to be hyper conscious about something that was second nature to me. I know some people find it offensive, but to me it was equally jarring being corrected all of the time. Maybe to understand you could ask yourself how you would feel if someone corrected you every time you said “thank you” or “please”. It would be confusing and a hard habit to break!

    • Erin says...

      OMG – the tooth thing. YES. Or potty training FB posts. No, no – I DON’T want to know that Little Johnny went poopy on the potty. So yucky. And, I have kids! LOL

  33. Savannah says...

    Ma’am! Even carrying my baby and looking beat to hell I get offended when I’m called ma’am.

  34. For some reason this is probably my favorite Friday illustration yet! It makes me laugh and also makes me think. Good one! Have a great weekend Joanna and team!

  35. Johanna says...

    Ha!