How Old Were You When You Lost Your Virginity?

i did at the age of 27…infact 3 monthx b4 my 28th brthday…the person wid whom i did it was my fioncee…previously he remianed my boyfrnd for 2 years and just after havng our engagmnt we did it the very next day. Mine experience was soo sad so poor althu he loved me bt he treated me so poorly i felt a lot of pain he didnt kiss me even strtaway he went fr it :( i didnt xpct it frm a guy who loved me sine last two years…got an engagmnr wid me but why did he treat me da way he did:( i hve lstnd such encounters aftr wtng till engmnt shd be too romntc bt dat was nt in my case…i loved him bt i felt sad dat i had prsrvd myslf till 28 just fr dis spcl momnt bt he had ruined it now we r married, i never had dis complain wid him, bt still i feel sad abt it ;(

i was 16 in my room with my best friend girl.

15, freshman in high school. i was WAY to curious about the whole thing and i wanted the “virginity” thing to be done with.
some advice: make sure your in love, don’t do it based strictly on curiosity.
reading these stories about all these women being in love with the first guy they did it with makes me wish i could do it over.

25 on my wedding night.

I was 20 and lost it after I was married. I am so glad that I waited until marriage. I find it interesting that so many other commenters here also waited because definitely my peers pressured me a lot about the fact that I was still a virgin and said some really hurtful things to me about the fact that I wanted to wait until I was married. Oh and for the record, I’m not Mormon either. I’m Lutheran (WELS).

Reading all these is fun! And encouraging.

At the age of 27, I’m still waiting for the “I dos” first.

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It was two weeks ago, on my wedding night. I am 27.

I couldn’t have asked for more.

I was 18, he was 16, and we had been dating for four months. It was the day after my high school graduation, and I just felt like it was a step into adulthood. I don’t really remember it too well, but he says it was great! We’re living together and engaged 9 years later, and it’s gotten much better since then!

Still a virgin at 24. Waiting for my wedding day!

18 on senior skip day with my then boyfriend who was also a virgin. Four months later I told him “he wasn’t doing it for me anymore” – um hello, you are 18 with your first – you are not that sexually mature to even know what does it for you! Hilarious. Obviously we broke up shortly thereafter. Whenever I see him (at the gym) it’s still awkward.

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I was 27.

It was my wedding day and my husband and I were both virgins, and Mormon. For us it was worth the wait.

21, wedding night. Definitely not Mormon! It was so tender and special and I am thankful for the trust we built by honoring each other’s decision to wait.

I’ll let you know

At 22 with my husband on my wedding night, almost 6 years ago.

Nineteen. I was studying abroad in London and determined not to come back to the States a virgin.

19 with an older guy I had been dating for two weeks. We had fooled around before then and he made sure I was ready…I was ready to jump his bones! At first it hurt but he had eased up and was great at giving oral. 8 years later and many sexual experiences with the same man later we eloped and are still together. I feel fortunate to be with someone who has let me explore my sexuality and have grown with. Now I think the more interesting question is when did you have your first orgasm…for women it’s not always concurrent with when we first have sex with another person.

23, wedding night, not Mormon…or Southern Baptist.

19, on my wedding night to my college sweetheart.

21 on our wedding night.

Best decision of my life.

I was 15 almost 16 with my high school boyfriend. I really don’t know why there are so many people on here who waited. I only knew 1 or 2 and they were very religious in my high school Even some of them got with their long term boyfriends. I guess I just don’t see the point!

@Sarah-oh, how delightfully critical of you. I was not passing judgement whereas you actually are. That aside, let me explain… I am not being boastful about this topic at all the way you’re accusing. I was only responding to the question Jo asked. Sorry if my answer stirs up some angry feelings in you. It wasn’t at all what I intended. I thought this was just a friendly discussion about a topic everyone was meant to weigh in upon if they so chose. I don’t go around judging others or sharing this personal story about my wedding night. The only people who know are those very close to me. I’m proud of this in a personal way, the same way I would be any major accomplishment i.e. running a marathon or earning a promotion at work, etc. I am also proud of my friends who accomplished the same feat because I well know it was extremely difficult, took a ton of patience and perseverance, and meant a lot to them. It’s somewhat rare and notable so for the purposes of this discussion I decided to share this unique perspective. While I know and totally get that not everyone would even WANT to do it, I also know it is something not everyone COULD do. I have so enjoyed reading the other responses because I actually appreciate the differences in others, especially regarding this topic as I know it’s ultimately such a personal journey based on so many aspects in a person’s life. Do I feel superior for waiting? Not at all. Do you feel superior by throwing out that criticism?

I had to post Anon just in case family or friends are also Cup of Jo readers, but I could not pass up the opportunity to share. I was 17, a few months shy of my 18th birthday. I planned the whole event including playing a particular CD I was obsessed with, lighting candles, etc. The dude was my high school crush’s best friend. I picked him out of spite for my crush, but also because he was game and did it mostly on a dare.

Everything was going according to plan until my Dad who usually worked late came home hours early. Since I was blasting the music, I didn’t hear his car or him come into the house. I didn’t even know he was there until he KNOCKED on my door. I screamed, “WAIT!!!!” and as I tried to throw clothes on, the boy tried to hide under the bed. The rest is a bit hazy (repressed memory), but from what I remember the boy ran out in his underwear and out of the house. I hid in the closet in shame crying. That night I couldn’t decide whether to be horrified which I was or excited that I had semi-accomplished my goal. After that I waited until I had a legit bf, but don’t remember really enjoying it until mid-college.

I was 22 on my wedding night. The hubs was my first boyfriend–we had been a couple for three and half years by the time we were married, though we had known each other for about seven years. I’d had a HUGE crush on him since I was 15, and always hoped I would marry someone LIKE him since I obviously couldn’t catch the real thing. What I didn’t know was that he fell for me the moment he saw me and was just waiting for the perfect moment to ask me out. We waited until we were married because we just thought that felt right–we wanted our physical relationship to be a sign of our commitment and not to rush anything. We wanted our first night as husband and wife to be special, and it was.

I’m usually the really flirty one between the two of us, but I suddenly incredibly shy, and he–the former “never-nude”–was so not. He was incredibly sweet, and we had lots of fun once we got over nerves. Totally wouldn’t change it, not even a little bit! ;]

I was 21 and I ended up marrying the stud. Twelve years later I’m still a very satisfied lady. I didn’t plan it that way but I have no regrets. Thank God!

I was 16 and he was my first boyfriend. Yeah, I know, way to wait for the perfect guy, right? We were together for a long time and it was…special, I think?? Long story short, it was also the first time I smoked weed so…it was an awkward situation all round!

And I wouldn’t wait till marriage to kiss. I want to really KNOW the person I pledge my life to and holding those little things back isn’t in my agenda.

19, with someone I met that day. I was travelling around Europe on my own, and I met a nice guy in my hostel who I went sightseeing that day with. A group of us went out for dinner that night, and then dancing, and we just ended up leaving the dancefloor for… the side of the road, behind some bushes! It was really fun, adventurous, and he was very nice. I never saw him again, even though we exchanged emails a couple of times afterwards. No regrets at all, and a fairly hilarious story… especially as the city’s name is Split!

21, on my wedding night! Still married, 13 years later. :)

I was 19, it wasn’t my boyfriend but a friend I had been hanging out with…and was friends with…I was just about to go back to college…he was about to move back to Kentucky….it just happened…I don’t regret it and it was a wonderful experience.

Oh Joanna I just love LOVE love you for talking about sex on your blog. It is something that is so missing from the blogosphere and a great reminder that to be a fabulous, strong, creative women you can still be vulnerable and sexy.

It was a few weeks after my 21st birthday… In a frat house. Extra points for classiness over here! It was an incredibly freeing experience that made me feel like for the first time I had complete ownership over my own existence. I was taking a course on German Love and Dersire in Literature and was struck by a line that said “Ist das Liebe? Nein, das ist Freiheit” – Is this love? No it is freedom.

Carlyree and Kate Harvey–I am not religious but I am pretty sure pride is right up there with lust…

Not yet. I just turned 30. I have no plans to get married.