1. This post is a celebration and I think people who came here just to stir the pot should go to one of the many forums on the internet made to debate this topic. We all know that you just want to “help” but this isn’t the place.

  2. Remember, there is a large population of the United States and the world that disagrees with this and you run the risk of alienating them. We need to always be respectful of different opinions. America is dividing more and more and it’s becoming a very unpleasant place to live. I have friends in both camps and they are all great people.

  3. Anonymous says...

    I understand that this is a sensitive issue and there are strong opinions/feelings on both sides. What I can’t understand is how one can call for love, respect, maturity, free speech, equal rights and then turn around and label those who might not fully agree with them as haters, bigots, religious fanatics, unconstitutional, etc. I find it hypocritical and wish the issue could be discussed without negativity on either side.

  4. I visited your blog for the first time and just been your fan. Keep posting as I am gonna come to read it everyday.

  5. awesome post……..
    This blog is ever amazing. Thanks


  6. Anonymous says...

    I don’t agree!!!!! Gay marriage is gross!!! God made marriage between a man and a woman.

  7. First, New York. Who’s is next? Hopefully Seattle isn’t too far behind for those of my friends who want to marry their lives.

  8. Anonymous says...

    Amanda, I recommend to you a movie that I loved, called “Saved!” It is warm, funny, smart, and thought-provoking.


  9. Linda, I do think there were plenty of people who explained WHY God tells us to think that way.

    Also, we are all NATURALLY sinners. That doesn’t mean we should continue in sin.

  10. I’m a Californian, and unfortunately, Proposition 8 passed in 2008 and banned marriage equality after it had been granted. It was really quite a crazy year when we elected our first African-American president yet took a step back in civil rights for same-sex couples.

    Glad to see New York adding itself to the states willing to stand up for equality. (Also glad to see people like Amanda posting her awareness that this is a civil rights issue, not a religious one.)

  11. linda says...


    i’ve read through most, if not all, of the comments on here…from both sides. and what i’ve noticed is that those who oppose same sex marriage do it because it’s their “beliefs”…”for religious purposes”…because “it goes against God’s plans”…so therefore, saying that it’s because it’s what your religion says because it’s what He says, makes perfect sense. i don’t see the silliness in that at all considering i’m just reiterating what have been said on here.

    and i will have to agree with that other anonymous person, acceptance and tolerance are the same. they go hand in hand with each other. not accepting it means you’re unable to tolerate it in the first place. and no, i don’t accept/tolerate your opinions when you haven’t given me legit reasons to accept/tolerate it in the first place.

    those who are really confident with their views, should be able to string together words to back it up with something legitimate. if their beliefs/religion teaches them to think a certain way, my gosh, i sure hope it tells them WHY they should think that way. if there isn’t, it’s…well…what others have already mentioned on here…ignorance and prejudice.

  12. Anonymous says...

    Dear Linda,
    “other than the fact that it’s what God says.” Are you kidding? Do you realize how silly that sounds?
    We’re not asking you to accept our view on this issue but what we are asking is that you be tolerant of it. Huge difference between the two.
    I sense that you too are unsettled on this issue in your own mind.
    Peace to you.

  13. linda says...

    for those of you who oppose of the whole homosexual and gay marriage thing, please explain WHY you oppose? other than the fact that it’s what God says.

    i mean, gay people, they’re gay because it’s natural to them. it’s natural that they are attracted to the same sex. it’s something that they can’t help. so why is it that people who are trying to live naturally, get no respect when it comes to receiving basic rights and benefits?

    please, enlighten me.

  14. Anonymous says...

    Kim, the last statistic I heard was that 62% of the nation is opposed.

  15. (One more thing) There are some commenters here in support of gay marriage who are trying to portray those that disagree with their view point as bigot extremists who are way behind the times. I said I am in the minority here in the comments but not in the real world. I guarantee if this had gone to vote, the people of New York would have voted it down (like prop 8) or it would have at least been very close. Although it doesn’t seem like it here, the majority of Americans are opposed to gay marriage. And just like those in support of it, those of us who are opposed, have a right to feel and vote that way.

  16. Anonymous says...

    Dear Anonymous 8:17 pm,
    Your words to a fellow reader were, ” get on board or you will be left behind.”
    Following the crowd is seldom a good idea.
    I’d rather march to the beat of my own drum, than follow the mass majority cuz it’s the “IN” thing to do.
    I’m proud to have grown my own backbone. And when the spines of one become strong, others follow suit even when we are in the minority.

  17. I don’t think it has a thing to do with equality, but it is a distortion, a perversion of God’s design. Marriage is a union between a man and a woman, nothing more, nothing less, nothing ‘whatever’ or alternate. It is His creation and man (meaning, mankind) has no right to redefine His perfect plan.

    “even a necessary portrait of the love that unites Christ and His church.” — Al Mohler


  18. Anonymous says...

    Kim, I agree. Just because other people’s decision to live a polygamous lifestyle does not impact me personally, that does not mean I approve. So, tell me, where is the line?

  19. I am also in the minority here in the comments but feel it is important for people to at least know there is a minority. I think it is quite sad to know my children will grow up in a country where there are no moral absolutes. I wonder if all the “love and equality for all” commenters are chomping at the bit for polygamy to be legalized as well? I’m not trying to come off as smug but I really am curious to know where the line is drawn or even if there is line? I feel strongly that marriage is between one man and one woman.

  20. Anonymous says...

    Stacy E., i agree 100% with you.

  21. Anonymous says...

    oh, and acceptance and tolerance are like the great divide in my mind. there is a huge difference between the two.

  22. Anonymous says...

    Dear Anonymous @1:04pm,
    I sense some confusion on your part as well as some hostility. Freedom of speech even covers us Prudes; of which I am one.
    And because my opinion differs from your opinion, your hostility shows up with name calling. You used: “prejudice” and “ignorant”.
    Isn’t that what they call bullying these days?
    The best part? I don’t have to beat my head against a wall hoping to come up with an explanation to suit you because I am very confident in my view on this subject. I am comfortable in my own skin on this issue.
    It seems you are still doing some soul searching on this one.
    Hugs to you,
    Anonymous @3:48

  23. Stacy E says...

    Anonymous@ 8:17, Hila etc. etc.

    It’s not necessary that I get into a battle of why this and that. My comment was simply stated and easy to understand. A man and a man and a woman and a woman will NEVER be “married.” What ever they want to call it, in my eyes it will never be marriage. Homosexuality is unnatural and I believe a blasphemy to God.

    It is often quoted in the scriptures and I choose to believe these writings that have been preserved for thousands of years over peoples changing ways and lifestyles.

    BTW: I agree with what others have said, I also believe fornication, adultery etc to be sin.

    The scriptures also say ALL sins can be forgiven, that is why through repentance and faith on Jesus I myself am not condemned to hell for the wrong which I have done.

  24. Anonymous says...

    it should also be noted from the last comment that i am not gay, and don’t even really have any close gay friends. it is simply what i view as common sense and any person who is educated, unafraid and non-prejudice should view the matter.

  25. Anonymous says...

    anonymous @3:48. i don’t see the difference between acceptance and tolerance. and when you say you don’t agree with someone’s “lifestyle” as if being gay is like a job or a hobby you choose, that is not love, tolerance or acceptance. no one is asking you to agree or approve it. simply by speaking out that you are not accepting of this lifestyle is what makes you intolerant. if someone says they do not think two people of the same sex should marry and can explain why (i have yet to hear a legitimate explanation) then i am open to hearing that explanation. when you say you don’t agree with the gay lifestyle, i am not opening to hearing why. this is the way people are NATURALLY born, and have been throughout history. do not say you are tolerant, but don’t accept this lifestyle. i doesn’t make sense and you simply need to come to terms with the fact that a) you are prejudice, or b) you are ignorant.

  26. Anonymous says...

    Dear Anonymous @ 1:04 pm,
    Opposing this viewpoint has nothing to do with intolerance.
    Each of us, you and me and everyone else on this planet, has the right to judge what is acceptable or unacceptable in our own personal lives. My views, opinions and beliefs are mine personally, just like yours are your own.
    Diversity is for all people, no matter their race or religion or sexual preference and that includes anyone who opposes what the majority has accepted, whatever that may be.
    Love and tolerance, yes of course! Acceptance? Not always.
    Hugs to you,
    Anonymous @3:48 pm

  27. Such a happy post! I loved going through all the profiles of the couples. Thank you for sharing :)

  28. Anonymous says...

    Bravo, indeed, to NY!

    (And bravo to Liberty – I see a nursing hook on her bra strap.)

  29. It’s taken me a few days to get to this post so I know I’m late in the game. However, I would just like to say that I appreciate the civil discussion taking place here between opposing views. Although I don’t agree with the homosexual lifestyle because of my faith, I still agree with Jamie’s thoughts above – separation of church and state means that our beliefs cannot infringe on someone’s right to marry and use the legal system to support their loved one. I think it’s hypocritical to, in the same breath, say that we want the state to allow for religious freedom and at the same time impose our faith-based worldviews to infringe on someone else’s. It is possible to hold fast to your worldview and at the same time respect someone else’s, build friendships, working relationships, with those people who hold differing opinions and lifestyles, and even protect their right to live their own lifestyles under the law. I hope through this conversation that people can understand that differing worldviews do not equal hatred, bigotry, persecution, name-calling and constant legal battles.

  30. I’m so happy you linked these photos. We just happened to be in NYC on July 24 and then also just happened to walk by city hall and saw what was going on. It was so exciting. Everyone was happy and celebrating. We saw the King couple being photographed and now I see what it was for. I’m so happy we got to see this, thanks :-)

  31. Proud to be a New Yorker.

  32. Anonymous says...

    BananaSaurusRed, you are correct. Shakespeare said, “Love Conquers all.”

    The Bible similarly states: “Love never fails,” 1 Corinthians 13:8

  33. I completely agree with you Amanda!

  34. Dear Anonymous,

    Shakespeare said: Love conquers all things and I do believe it. Incest is abuse, not love.

  35. ‘the societies and cultures we live in’, not ‘it’. Sorry for the typo above :)

  36. I feel so sad reading some of the negative comments here. Marriage, just like anything else in human history, has a history. This is obvious, but evidently needs to be stated for the benefit of those who make comments such as ‘marriage is between a man and a woman’, or ‘marriage is about religion’. While it’s true that there are many religious implications to marriage, it’s not a fixed thing – it’s something that has evolved and been shaped historically to reflect the societies and cultures we live it. For example, the idea that marriage is based on love rather than property is only a recent development in human history. The question is, are we actually going to evolve and mature as a culture and allow marriage to reflect our modern world, or we going to keep harping back to archaic definitions of marriage that really are quite pointless in modern life? I know which side I’m on. I’m so disheartened by the narrow-mindedness displayed by some people when this issue is raised.

    On the bright side, yay Joanna! More power to you :) This is one of the reasons I love your blog – you put yourself and your ideals out there. I wish more people did. Let’s hope the rest of the world follows New York’s lead …

  37. Cheers to these couples! Equality for everyone!

  38. I previously commented about how incredibly awesome the situation in New York is.

    I just quickly wanted to add I recommend that anybody who is basing their beliefs in anything in their lives, in this case using it as the basis for arguments against marriage for people who are of the same sex, research into what the wording in the Bible was initially and how it has since been translated.


  39. Anonymous says...

    Ahhhhh somebody explain!!! Statments such as “i disagree with their lifestyles”, “it’s unnatural”, “marriage is only between a man and woman”, “i disagree from a religious standpoint, it’s a sin.” Like the last person said: Use your words! Explain yourself! Marriage isn’t a naturally occurring thing, people invented it! We can change the meaning. Homosexuality isn’t a choice or lifestyle, it is someone’s NATURAL sexual preference. If it doesn’t feel natural to you, no worries, no one is asking you to be gay. What makes it a sin? Who is it hurting? Besides allowing more people to socially legitimate their love, it doesn’t affect anyone else’s life! If you think it effects society, making it unstable or untraditional, well it used to be tradition to cut off people’s heads for political treason or burn people who didn’t convert to Catholicism. CLEARLY change is sometimes good… get on board or you will be left behind!

  40. Anonymous says...

    I’m responding to the anonymous comment that I believe was a response to my anonymous comment earlier, as they quoted me. The response said that people who believe in gay marriage and don’t “respect” non believers are not practicing what they preach: acceptance. At the beginning of this comment you stated you don’t believe in gay marriage but accept gay people, as people. In this same comment you compared gay marriage to “incest” and said it effects you because you want a “stable” society. THIS is anything but acceptance, and when I called for a explanation or reasoning you just said “religious reasons.” I respect all religions, but I do not respect blind ignorance. If you cannot explain why your religion takes this stance for yourself, you are purely ignorant, afraid and prejudice. Use your words and think for yourself! And do not expect respect for your opinions when you can not do this, let alone when you insult people by comparing their love to incest. You should honestly be ashamed.

  41. Love wins.

  42. Anonymous says...

    Thank you, Amanda, for being brave enough to speak up about the saving love of Jesus and how that really is the most important matter. I think Christians often get so caught up in politics and minor details that they forget that the gospel is a message of LOVE and that in the end, all that really matters is faith in Jesus and his sacrifice.

    On another note, I personally don’t understand why Christians are so quick to criticize gay marriage when, in reality, our belief system upholds the principle of no sex outside marriage. Period. Many church officials turn a blind eye to live-in couples yet criticize homosexuality. That is the real problem, if you ask me: that the general reactions are inconsistent with the core beliefs.

    But ANYWAYS. No one is perfect. But God loves all. And tells us to love all. Nothing is more important than loving God and loving your neighbor as yourself. And ALL men and women, regardless of sexual orientation, are our neighbors. Love conquers all. That’s Biblical, too.

  43. Such adorable + loving photos! I can feel the love…
    As a heterosexual married mother of two…I say bravo nyc is right!

  44. Mindy says...

    All true love in this world can only be a good thing and should be appreciated, relished and celebrated.

    Well done NY, us in the UK have jumping for joy, now come on the rest of the states, catch up!

    LOVE IS LOVE <3 <3 <3

  45. Stacy E says...

    Why was my comment deleted? It was not obscene. No freedom of speech here?

  46. Stacy E says...

    But….a woman can’t marry a woman and a man can’t marry a man. Its unnatural. How ever they want to live their life is their choice but I will never consider a woman and a woman “married” or a man and a man “married.” It’s not right, completely wrong.

    Like others’, I have friends that live as homosexuals. Love the sinner, hate the sin.

  47. I dont believe in (any) GOD (call me an atheist).
    I believe in love.
    I am (very) straight – not married – in the long term relationship and have a baby girl (guess that would make me a sinner in the eyes of church (any church).
    I live in Amsterdam, the Netherlands where gay marriage has been legalised since 2001 (The Netherlands was the first country to legalize same-sex marriage) and oposite to many comments here, this has not influenced/changed my life in any way (certainly not a bad way).

    I have to say I am a bit surprised that this post has stirred all these crazy reaction. Just leave people to live their lives, what do you care who they choose to love???


  48. Anonymous says...

    Thank you for your comment Amanda. You hit the nail on the head.

  49. As someone who is often alone in my community in my support for gay rights, the best opposition I can offer towards people who deem this a religious issues is this: We here in America celebrate the separation of church and state. That is one of the basic rights our country is founded on, and it is what allows us all to practice whatever religion we choose. In keeping with this, you have no right to keep others from having the same civil liberties as you do just because it doesn’t fit with your faith. Your hate for these people doesn’t fit with my faith, but it is still allowed. So is their right to marriage.
    Your opinion is allowed, but that shouldn’t stop them from having equal rights.

  50. Anonymous says...

    I think you’ve said quite enough, Amanda.

  51. Anonymous says...

    the thing though amanda, is that by denying people marriage – you’re not just denying them love. the reality of the situation is that marriage is a legal institution tied to other rights – including the way people are taxed (which was reason enough to start a pretty big revolution here a few hundred years ago), the way that they receive health care (one of the most basic human rights), child custody, property ownership, inheritance, etc. etc. therefore, not allowing people to get married is denying them rights!

    and to speak frankly, as a tax-paying, upstanding, hard-working bisexual citizen, who has never so much as received a parking ticket and volunteers regularly – my life is really none of your business at all!

  52. Anonymous says...

    Oh dear. How many “sacred bonds between man and woman” that have been formed in a christian church end happily these days? If you read your bible you know it is “until death ladidaa”. Please step down from your high horse and focus on what goes on in your own bedroom rather than the neighbour’s and the world might actually be a happier place. God invented orgasms and love or maybe nobody told you? Way to go NY!

  53. I understand anonymous. I just wanted to give my reasoning behind what I believe, since other commenters were complaining that others in opposition were not explaining themselves. I understand that if you don’t agree with what I believe it pretty much ends there. Just another example of separation of church and state. No one is going to change based on basic morals alone. I don’t think I completely ignored the Equal Protection Clause. I agree that just because someone is gay, that does not mean they should be denied basic rights.

  54. Anonymous says...

    you’re an inspiration jo! i want to high five you for the post. i see this word used a few times in the comments so far, but i’ll reiterate it: you’re all class.

  55. Anonymous says...

    Amanda, now that you’re quoting entire passages of verse, and ignoring the Equal Protection Clause, your argument has really exhausted itself. I would have been open to your alternative interpretation of the laws that govern us all, but your religious beliefs have no relationship to or power over anyone who happens not to follow your religion.

  56. Glenda says...

    Born and raised in NYC I’m so proud! Finally there’s equality!

  57. Just as an additional side note, just because I don’t agree with same sex marriage, that does not mean that I think that they should be denied basic rights. Goes along with the idea of separation of church and state.

  58. Jen says...

    Yahoo! So excited for NY. Here in Canada we were so happy to welcome gay marriage in 2005 and I’m elated that our close relative (NY) is jumping into the future and doing what’s right! Thanks for braving the anonymous commenters of the world and posting this.

  59. I am particularly pleased when people who are opposed to marriage equality misspell “woman.” That tells you exactly who you are dealing with.

    These are lovely photos. Very happy for these happy couples! It’s about time. :)

  60. The following is a response I wrote to a friend on this issue a couple of years ago:

    Now what you said about gay marriage and all that; I agree with you. I do think it is terrible that people would use religion as an excuse to hate a homosexual. Jesus did not hate homosexuals and he did not hate prostitutes and tax collectors. But the reason why Jesus sat with prostitutes and tax collectors is because He came to save sinners, not those who believed that they were righteous on their own and didn’t need a Savior. Jesus’ message has always been to love. He wants us to love people, but hate the sin. Jesus loved the prostitutes and tax collectors but He didn’t commend what they were doing. He told them their need to repent, to turn from their sin and put their trust in Him. Matthew 4:17 says, “From that time Jesus began to preach saying, ‘Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.’” John 3:16-17 says “For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through Him.”

    Now, I believe that God wrote the Bible by inspiring the authors what to write. 2 Timothy 3:16 says, “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness.” Because Jesus is God (there are a number of verses in the Bible that say this, if you would like me to give them to you, let me know) and He literally is the Word of God, as John 1:1 says, than the entire Bible is what Jesus said. And there are a few different passages in which He says that homosexuality is sin. 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 says, “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.”

    He doesn’t say that just homosexuals won’t enter the kingdom of heaven, but sinners, sinners that continue to practice sin with no desire to turn away from it. I myself have definitely fallen into some of that sin up there, greediness and idolatry (not actual golden idols, but loving something more than God, which is what idolatry actually is), etc. But God convicted me of that sin and changed me. So that I no longer make a PRACTICE of sinning, but I seek to obey Him. And that’s the point. The loving thing to do, although it may not appear to be, is to help someone see that they are a sinner in need of a Savior! If Jesus would meet a homosexual, or really, a person practicing the sin of homosexuality, He would lovingly tell them that it is sin and that they need to repent and trust in His sacrifice on the cross so that they may enter His Kingdom. That is true love.

  61. I guess the people who are against these sweet pictures and this whole matter have never been in love.

    Yeah for NY!

    Yeah for love!

    Yeah for equal rights! It’s actually silly it had to take this much time…

    All men are equal right?!

  62. Anonymous says...

    Amanda, I’m looking at the Equal Protection Clause. You may not look to the Constitution as the ultimate authority – that’s your choice, and I’m not about to enjoin you from it – but it is, thankfully, the ultimate authority of law.

  63. Ven, I’m sorry, you’re right. I didn’t word that correctly. I guess my main point with that poorly written statement was that one of the main reasons why God instituted marriage was for procreation, which is impossible between a same sex couple.

  64. Ven says...

    Amanda: “If marriage wasn’t between a man and a woman, people would cease to exist”

    This is not a fact.

    1. What about men and women who aren’t married but have children? My (straight) parents have been together for 31 years and have three children, but they were never formally married. I have not “ceased to exist”!

    2. What about artificial insemination? Many gay and straight couples (or single parents) have used artificial insemination, sperm donors, surrogates, etc. to create children, none of which requires a marriage, just an egg and sperm.

    3. Non-human animals do not engage in marriage, so does that mean that their species will cease to exist. Of course not.

    4. Not every person on the earth needs to procreate in order to continue the human species. What about people who are infertile, incapable of sustaining a pregnancy, or just don’t want children? Why is nobody starting a witch hunt for these people? Why is it only for gay couples? *I am NOT saying that there is anything wrong with people who don’t want children. I’m undecided myself about whether I want to have kids. I’m just bringing up the curious fact that you think this possible cessation of the human species is because of gay people.

  65. shorty, clearly i’m HUGELY on the side of gay marriage and am thrilled that NY is recognizing it! i took that comment down literally as soon as i wrote it because i realized that in this case i don’t agree with commenters who are against gay marriage in any way. i am in agreement with you, of course (which is why i wrote this post)! i support it for 10,000 reasons and actually worked at the ACLU one summer on a project supporting legalizing gay marriage. i am on your side!! xoxo

  66. Absolutely love these photos and stories! It is so inspiring to see the dedication and love of these couples finally be recognized! If anything, I think this *strengthens* the cause for marriage. Beautiful!

  67. Anonymous, which part of the Constitution are you referring to? I don’t look at the Constitution as my ultimate authority either, again I look to God. God has said in His Word to obey the goverment as long as it doesn’t go against His Word. So I will. I do agree with separation of church and state.

  68. Bravo, NY! I very much enjoyed this feature.

    And to those who disagree, I truly don’t understand using “religion” as your opposing backbone? People are allowed to marry regardless of what their religion is. Marriage is not only for people of certain faith, be it Christian, Jewish, or any other. It’s a right of all people. To some, it is tied to relgion, but to others it is not. It is simply a right, and one that should be able to be exercised by all, regardless of who their partners are! I truly hope more states follow suit.

  69. Anonymous says...

    Amanda, it doesn’t make you seem archaic, it just makes you seem unfamiliar with the Constitution.

  70. Sumslay, and to others who have commented on here: It really depends on how you decide what’s right and wrong. Do you just decide for yourself. God’s Word, the Bible, is where I go to for authority for what right and wrong is. And the Bible does make sense. God created man and woman with differences for a reason. If marriage wasn’t between a man and a woman, people would cease to exist!
    I don’t understand either how some people on here that think marriage should only be between a man and a woman and then say they are glad to see that these people are happy and think it’s good for them. I want to ask those who said that, what is your reasoning for not saying its okay in the first place?
    Just because one doesn’t agree with same sex marriage does not automatically make them a “hater.” I don’t agree with it, but I don’t hate those who are involved in same sex marriage. I just want them to know what the truth of the Bible says, and that’s actually out of love. I know I won’t find many who agree with this, but I also don’t mind if that makes me seem “archaic”.

  71. Ven says...

    ** To be clear, I was not implying your blog had no substance, Joanna. I have been reading your blog for two years now and I adore it. I understand blogs can offer an escape from heavier news, but I’m confident that your readership can handle a human rights issue every now and again. Love your blog :)

  72. Ven says...

    I love this post. It’s about time. I am probably the thousandth person to say it, but Erin’s comment is spot on.

    To the person who was upset that Jo posted this on her blog, it is HER blog. She has complete authority to post whatever she likes, whenever she likes. Heaven forbid a blog mentions something with any more substance than the best t-shirts or “pretty pictures”.

    I wish people could stop hiding behind the bible and religion and start forming their own opinions. Most people who commented in opposition to gay marriage have opposed marriage due to religion; perhaps it’s about time to believe something not just because “God says”. How about human dignity? Equal rights? I am straight with many gay friends, and their ability to get married has absolutely no negative effect on my personal life, nor does it negatively affect yours.

  73. These photos are BEAUTIFUL! I can’t wait for the day when we’re all embarrassed and puzzled about why this took us so long.

    Kudos to you for being such a positive ally, Joanna.

  74. life can be so wonderful if we open our eyes and hearts to others. the people above have the same joys, worries and struggles as every other man and woman in this country. the thought that their love and right to security as citizens are not as valid as someone who is ‘religious’ is truly baffling to me. but really, intolerance is nothing new, who cares what they think? i sure don’t. some people choose to love and some people choose to hate in the name of love. i say live and let live!

    thanks so much for sharing!

  75. samantha says...

    Stephanie, could you elaborate more on this statement?

    “Marriage was not invented by man or society. It’s initial appearance on planet Earth hundreds of thousands of years ago happened for the first time, thanks to religion.”

    You’ve really got me thinking here! My understanding is that the ‘original purpose’ of marriage was to secure alliances between tribes, clans, etc and to continue the bloodline of the male. Once institutionalized, marriage became a legal way to pass on possessions and so forth. I don’t think religion had much to do with such matters of pragmatism. And even if it did.. WHICH religion, exactly, bestowed this gift of ‘marriage’ upon homo sapiens? My point is, marriage is very much man-made (and therefore notably different across various societies.)

    In fact, it was only in recent history that marriage had anything to do with love. Just a few generations ago, marriage was more about convenience and practicality, instead of romance. Now that marriage is more socially defined as the product of undying LOVE rather than a thing of productive necessity, it’s only natural that the LGBT community wants in!

    If anything, I reckon ‘haters’ should have a bigger issue with marriage today being about LOVE, rather than fussing over the genders of the people getting married.

    Just my 0.02. :)

  76. i was SO SO SO excited when i heard the news!! i love these photos, ESPECIALLY the one of the couple as justice & liberty :) so fitting! LOVE!!!

  77. Great comment, Shorty. I do not respect those who do not respect the rights of the people I love.

  78. Maybe I’m playing devil’s advocate here, but no one has really brought up the economic implications for a fiscally-struggling state like NY (if you don’t live in NY, be glad! Our taxes are ca-razy!). I wrote a short piece about it here, if anyone is interested: http://goo.gl/0LxNm

    I also wanted to share what NY State Senator Roy McDonald, a Republican representing the Saratoga area (Upstate NY) said about his decision in regards to gay marriage:

    “You get to the point where you evolve in your life where everything isn’t black and white, good and bad, and you try to do the right thing. You might not like that. You might be very cynical about that. Well, f**k it, I don’t care what you think. I’m trying to do the right thing. I’m tired of Republican-Democrat politics. They can take the job and shove it. I come from a blue-collar background. I’m trying to do the right thing, and that’s where I’m going with this.”

    Sen. McDonald is a gray-haired, middle-aged, Christian, relatively conservative elected official. I hope all commenters will think about these words, no matter what side of the debate you are on.

  79. Another reason why I love New York so much! Thank you for posting this Joanna!

    And I am not lying when I say it seriously makes me sick to see that there are still so many people with such closed minds and negative feelings towards people loving each other.

    Focus on the love and happiness in your own life, instead of trying to keep it from others.

  80. linda says...

    a agree with michelle ^^ above. using God as a way to justify that marriage should only be between a male and female is absurd.

    legalized marriage. it allows (gay) human beings to have the same rights and benefits as (straight) human beings. what makes these two types of people..gay and straight..different other than their own choice to love and be with the same sex? why is it God’s decision to decide who is allowed to have certain rights and who is deemed immoral..when those rights do not in any way affect anyone else.

  81. Katrina says...

    Anon 12:29 — why should it be “the ONLY way to go?” What is “SO wrong” about gay marriage? Please explain further, and please stick to arguments that are rooted in demonstrable logic and the US system of law. If you have a position, back it up.

  82. Stephanie Kantz says...

    What I don’t understand is, why do homosexuals insist on having the term “marriage” apply to them, when marriage initially came into existence through religion?

    Marriage was not invented by man or society. It’s initial appearance on planet Earth hundreds of thousands of years ago happened for the first time, thanks to religion.

    And marriage is a concept that has continued to be defined in every major world religion as a physical and spiritual union between a man and a woman. The idea of “marriage” is not a man made one–it is one that religion initially defined.

    So why don’t homosexuals and the law simply call it something else? Call it a civil union and give them the same rights as married couples.

    But the definition of marriage, which was given to us by religion (and is consistent in every major world religion), does not include the union of same sex partners. Insisting that the term “marriage” apply to homosexual couples is like insisting a banana is an orange. By definition a banana is not an orange. And by the definition of marriage, same sex couples simply don’t apply.

    I also find it so saddening that everyone here who thinks that same-sex marriage is not okay feels the need to comment anonymously. There are plenty of well educated, thoughtful, smart individuals opposed to same sex marriage. It doesn’t mean they are backwards or provincial, and it certainly doesn’t mean that they should feel ashamed for what they believe.

  83. ITS ABOUT TIME! :) wish california would follow suit. stupid stupid prop 8.

    also, reading “marriage is between a man and a woman” makes ME CRINGE!

    im getting married at the end of the month and we are saying a bit in our ceremony about how we wish everyone could get married and that its a civil right.

    thanks for posting this joanna!

  84. Anonymous says...

    this is SO wrong. marriage between a man and a woman should be the ONLY way to go. it’s sad that our world has come to this. such a shame.

  85. God didn’t create legal marriage.

  86. Such beautiful photos. I don’t see how anyone could even attempt to justify not allowing homosexual couples the same rights as heterosexual couples. I understand there are people who don’t support gay marriage from a religious standpoint, but one religion shouldn’t influence the law or restrict the rights of any citizen in the United States.

  87. *E says...

    these are beautiful photos and it’s a lovely post, Joanna!

    i can’t help but note that all the ignorant “haters” in this comment feed are posting as anonymous. nice one guys, way to stand behind your so-called principles. and since when did GOD “create” marriage?! i am pretty sure that people created marriage, with all its pomp, circumstance and signed contracts, and we can make of it what we will.

    also, my conservative christian upbringing (something so many of you seem to be using as mask for your blatant homophobia) taught me that god loves and accepts everyone and expects those who follow him to do the same.

  88. thank you for posting this, joanna. this is an issue that is truly close to my heart; with a handful of gay family members and my childhood best friend being gay, how could it not be? it saddens and confuses me immensely that the gay community had and LOST the right to marriage here in california. i think new york has given many of us hope that it will soon be back.

    i’d also like to reply to anonymous 2:53:
    you DON’T love your gay “friends” and coworkers just as you do your other friends. loving them the same would involve wanting what’s best for them and wanting them to be happy; to TRULY be happy. love is a selfless act, and not believing that your gay friends are entitled to the right to marry (just as you are) is 100% selfish. may God open YOUR eyes and teach you that He is a compassionate God who loves ALL this earth’s creatures equally, including you.

  89. Jo, you had a comment up before (that seems to have been removed?) stating that you “respect” the point of view of those who oppose gay marriage (and are glad they are still “loyal readers” – keep those page views up!). While respecting other peoples opinions may be a wonderful thing when it comes to choosing a restaurant or a pair of pants, can you really tell me that you would RESPECT someone who tells you that your relationship with Alex is a sin, that you shouldnt be able to be by his side as he dies, that his family should be able to take Toby from you if Alex dies? These are the situations that bigots’ “respected” opinions trap queer couples in every day – to me, there is nothing in that hatred and inequality to respect.

  90. love how new yorkers act like they are the first state in the country to do this.

  91. enough of this crap that god created marriage. as if.

    when did god create a social institution. what b.s.

    these photos are so so beautiful. love the simplicity from a photography standpoint. congratulations!

  92. So, so, so beautiful. Thank you for linking to their wonderful stories and sharing this collection of photographs.

    Much love and happiness to all of NY’s newlyweds!

  93. Anonymous says...

    I’m a Quaker and consider myself a religious Christian (although I don’t think my religious views, or anybody else’s should shape the law), so I have to ask some of the commenters above, when exactly did Jesus ever speak against gay marriage?! Yes, there is a passage in the Old Testament that can be translated as such. The same chapter of the same book (Leviticus, Chapter 20) also says that if a man sleeps with a woman while she is menstruating, they will be exiled. The following chapter of Leviticus, 21, says that people with flat noses, the blind, and the physically disabled can’t approach the altar of God. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to make this a religious debate, because again US laws should have nothing to do with religion, but I think it’s something worth thinking about if you happen to be a religious person.

  94. Beautiful. Thank you for posting this. I hope that one day everyone can look at this as an incredible step forward for humanity and society. Everyone deserves happiness!!

  95. Emilie says...

    I thought this was a beautiful post full of lovely couples. The fact that anyone would stop following a great blog like yours Joanna because of one post they don’t agree with is just plain silly. I guess if something makes someone uncomfortable they would rather pretend like it doesn’t exist. Sad that people still are like that in 2011. Love is love and everyone deserves the right to marry the person they love anywhere they want to. (Hopefully the ‘anywhere they want to’ will happen soon!)

  96. I absolutely love these photos! What an amazing article it must have been to work on, to be the witnesses of such happiness. So lovely. I’m so happy that steps towards equality are being taken, though I wish equality were the status quo.


  97. Thank you for posting this Joanna! It is beautiful & made me teary-eyed.

    I just got married in June to my husband & I am so happy that ALL couples are finally being treated with equality. {I just hope the rest of the country can follow in similar footsteps}

  98. Joanna this is a wonderful post! Unfortunately, as soon as I saw this post, I knew that it would receive some negative feedback. I grew up in the Deep South, and I am way too aware of people’s ignorance and negativity towards people who are different than they are. As someone with many gay friends and loved ones, these attitudes make me so sad. I’m happy to live in San Francisco now, which is so gay friendly compared to Georgia. I can’t wait until the day when all people in the U.S. have the opportunity to marry and love freely. XO

  99. this post is gorgeous, inspiring, uplifting and exciting. i have only lived in NY for two years but im so proud to call it my home, as we’re leading the way in equality for same sex couples. thank you, joanna, for spotlighting such an important day in our city’s history.

  100. Joanna, this post is wonderful. Thank you for sharing.

    You heart is beautiful and I’m glad to be among your readers for some years now (you were single when I add your blog in my google reader).

    Big hug!

  101. What a great post, and what a great job NYMag did, as usual. Thanks for posting this, and just saw on your Twitter you might be losing readers because this, but lots of respect on doing what is right.

  102. Thank you so much for sharing this on here. hen I was growing up, my divorced, feuding heterosexual parents were most horrible example of marriage to me but a gay couple who were close family friends were only my true example of a perfect union. I hope someday all of the US chooses to embrace love in this way.

  103. Sweet, sweet post. And, bonus! You got rid of some bigot readers!

  104. i LOVE this comment: “truly moving to read the snippets of interviews, especially the ones with the older couples who have been together longer than most of us readers have been alive, and who can now, finally, share the same legal rights of marriage as their straight fellow-citizens.”