Design

Do you ever worry that you won’t meet your soulmate?

Remember that episode of Seinfeld when Jerry says that only 5 percent of the population is date-able? Elaine asks, “Then how are the other 95 percent getting together?” Jerry’s response? “Alcohol.”

When I was single, I felt the same way. I was meeting lots of people–but no one I really wanted to date. And the guys I did like already had girlfriends (or just weren’t interested, sad). My mom kept telling me that I would definitely end up with someone fabulous and that I shouldn’t worry so much. She said she was 100% sure and that it was normal to worry but that I didn’t need to. But it was easy for her to say–she was already blissfully married! And I was 28 (which felt old to me at the time). Plus, New York seemed like the roughest place to date: You’re always surrounded by models (honest-to-goodness perfect-skinned, long-legged, 6-foot-tall Ukrainian models), and the guys you meet seem to either be married or a little nuts.

Once I met Alex, I realized that I was silly to have worried so much. We’re all such smart, funny and wonderful people, and so many people would be lucky to have us. Why does it often take a relationship to realize that? Plus, as my mom says, “It only takes one person to have met the love of your life!” A while ago, I heard another great quote: “If you knew you were going to meet the love of your life in one year, how different would that year be?” That awesome quote reveals how much we sometimes worry about our dating lives when we could be relaxing and enjoying other parts of our lives.

What’s your relationship status? What are your dating woes? Do you ever worry that you’re never going to find your soulmate? Do you think your city plays into it? If you’re in a relationship, how do you feel now? I would love to hear… xoxo

  1. Ann says...

    I’m 30 and just going through a divorce after being married for 5 years. Its like starting all over again and now I really worry I may never find the one or have kids. I’m getting older and want a family and to settle down more than anything.

  2. Anika says...

    I just turned 28. I’ve had a very eventful dating life. Lots of interesting people, some weirdos, and a first love that broke my heart. I’ve learned a lot about myself through the ups n downs. I became so depressed in my last (and only) relationship that I had to break it off because he was not treating me well. I learned I have major abandonment issues and fear of being single. But since my breakup about a year ago I’ve worked on my issues through introspection and therapy. I can say that I am proud of myself for doing the inner work and facing my fears! I dated some guys here and there in the past year since my breakup. One of them ghosted me and the others did not work out because long-distance (I met them while I was travelling), or they weren’t interested/I wasn’t interested, etc. My self esteem has taken many hits but I keep pushing through because Ive always pursued what I want no matter the many, many obstacles I encounter. I don’t know if I want marriage/kids. I just know I want a really kind loving passionate loyal man to share my time with, a best friend and lover. And one day I’m gonna meet him, so I keep trying- even though future is uncertain. I have some sad moments, especially following another unsuccessful dating venture but maybe one day I will be successful. To whoever reading this and feeling like me, just know we’re in it together. Also, I wonder if the people posting back in 2011 have found their match yet?

    • Leslie says...

      Ha, I read this in 2012 after a bad breakup. Then I dated A LOT, lots of ups and downs. I tried to live by the motto above: how would you live if you knew you were about to meet the love of you life? I’ve done this to varied success. Another serious relationship just ended and I found myself returning to this post because I needed to reread it and feel comforted. It’s too soon to date again but I plan to get back out there one day, when I’m done mourning. Good luck.

  3. Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (or they should) says...

    I am so scared of not finding the one. Especially since all my friends are tied down now. But something I realized after reading all these posts is that most of the commenters are under 30. Why are we so worried?! Don’t get me wrong, I share the same fear as all these other fabulous ladies (and gents). But can’t we just enjoy our lives and not worry until there’s something to worry about (ex. 40 and single–and even then, those are some strong ass, independent women. Cheers to them)?

    Let’s not worry in our twenties, ladies!

    xoxo

  4. pete says...

    im 42 and i worry everyday if i am going to be single my friends tell me that im cute and i have a great personality maybe its my shyness

  5. Kathleen says...

    I have two beautiful daughters, both in their late 20’s and single. They have had relationships and been heartbroken more than once! They are very sad and lonely, but they push themselves through each day, working, going to the gym, hanging with friends, concerts, movies, running ect. I keep telling them that there is someone out there just waiting for them but it is very hard to see them get down, their self esteem can get very low. The majority of their friends are dating, gotten married and have babies, very hard for a single person to socialize with couples!! They also have tried dating sites only to be disappointed in the choices! I am very supportive and their constant cheerleader, but I believe this is becoming old news to them. Sometimes the green eyed monster comes out in me when I see past friends some who were not so nice to my girls find their significant other and are very happy. I know this is immature of me but my heart aches for my daughters! I cannot give up hope for them though, i continue to believe that good things come to those who wait!

  6. Jane says...

    I recently turned 30 and I’ve finally reached the “f@#k it” stage of my life, where I’m relentlessly pursuing my dreams–other people’s opinions be damned. It helps that I’m single, childless and in many ways as optimistic ( and unencumbered) as a bright eyed bushy tailed teen. Though I genuinely crave the intimacy of a stable relationship, reinventing myself, embarking on new educational/career goals, solo international travel, volunteerism and general positvity has helped me fall in love with myself, in unimaginable ways. It’s been fulfilling being responsible for my own happiness. Most days, I feel like the “free spirited, NYC dwelling, late blooming, but somehow things work out her because she’s generally awesome,” television trope we see in sitcoms. Lol. If I meet someone, wonderful. But, I can’t help but feel grateful for the array of life lessons, which have shown me I already have, the minute I looked within.

  7. Gina Gonzalez says...

    At 15 years old I only had one boyfriend and he was Mr wrong guy after that I did not date someone else so its obvious my special someone doesn’t exist

  8. Lexi says...

    I’m turning 25 this year and I never had a boyfriend. At first, it was okay since I was still young then, but now, as I grow older, it depresses me more than I can tell. I wonder if there is really someone meant for me, or if I’m meant to be alone. I wanted to be with someone, but that someone is always not sure if he really wants to be with me. Is there something wrong with me? I wanted so bad to be with him. Is it really a waste of time to wait? or should I take control? Please help.

    • Zoe says...

      There’s nothing wrong with you. Believe me tons of girls feel the same way as you do, including me. So you are not alone. I’m not a relationship expert (and heck those so called relationship experts have crappy relationships all the time), and most of the time I don’t know what to do either and I try not to think about it and just focus on my career. I know this isn’t helpful, but I want you to know that you are definitely not alone.

    • Hannah says...

      I’m going to echo Zoe – there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. I am in my first relationship at 25 and earlier this year had a guy just like yours – he was always willing to hang out/etc. but beyond that, he was never quite certain. But I had to make the decision, after a disastrous 25th birthday, to put myself out there (app-based dating! yikes!) and the first guy I messaged turned out to be the person I had been looking for.
      You just have to be willing to look.

  9. RealityCheck says...

    Oh Boy, these topics are very Depressing.

  10. casey says...

    I’m 28 and I have never had a boyfriend. I only had my first kiss when I was 27 and I’ve had a couple of guys that I thought were interested in me but I haven’t had any luck finding a partner. I’ve always struggled with feeing as though there is something ‘wrong’ with me and it’s been steadily growing worse now that my friends are getting engaged or married. I would like to get married and have a family one day but at this stage I don’t see that happening and it really upsets me

  11. lucy says...

    I am 22 years old and all of my friends are in long-term relashionships, have kids or are married. I always thought that I would be the first to marry or have a serious boyfriend but it hasn’t worked that way. All of the males that I’ve been associated with have not wanted anything serious with me, which has led me to think, what is wrong with me? I attract men who are not looking for relashionships. I have gone down a road where I started going out to the bars and clubs to just pass the time because I started not to believe in love anymore. I honestly do not believe in meeting a soul mate or the one anymore.

    • jessie says...

      Aww… maybe it’s just not the right time yet! The same thing happens to me, I am 22 years old too, met some wrong men who didn’t want anything serious with me, I also met some amazing men but the time/distance was very off! It’s very frustrating I know. Since some friends around me are already in serious relationships and all, and me… Questioning whether there is something wrong with me. There is nothing wrong with us :) It’s just not the right time yet, we are still so young anyway! Right now I’m not looking for a relationship, and I won’t settle for the wrong man too. But I’m also open to a possibility for the right man. Just enjoy your life :)

  12. sarang says...

    am 26 years and tbh ,I never thought of getting married so much till recently ! well I used to just think that I need to have my time for my self and I have so much to do other than marrying ..so much new things to learn and specialties to have ..then like in recent years I have been thinking that I need someone by my side ‘of course beside my family” someone who needs me and rely on me and someone who I really could trust and love forever ..so here Iam thinking that am running outta time and started to realize that almost all of my friends are getting married or already married :/ so this scares me that maybe am gonna be alone for the rest of my life and that I wont be in love ..I never dated and I know nothing about love “yea u can imagine” but don’t get me wrong ..am not introverted and not “ugly ” kekeke but that’s me ..I really sometimes get jealous of dramas that I watch cuz I also want to have a couple like that XD according to what u said I think I should be patient ^^ and I hope I will meet my knight one day :)

  13. Jess says...

    So I’m 27 and I’m not going to lie. It gets to me that I still haven’t found someone worthy of my time. Most of my friends are in long term relationship or married, and I feel left out. It’s basically out of my control, so I can only hope for the best and work on myself before I meet the one.

  14. sarah says...

    well I have 29 years old ,im single and happy single cause i believe in magic in destiny in hapiness and im not afraid of anything, actually i believe that our fears is our futur .

  15. doc says...

    31 yrs old lost my mother to cancer at 17. Never dated in High school dad moved on about 5 or 6 yrs ago and I’m still stuck no soul mate ot many dates and have gotten to the point where I truly think love is a big lie. Seeing friends get married and pregnant has only screwed up my head even more. Where did I get left behind, what’s my purpose are just a few of the things that go through my head every day. Do I want to move on yes, will I ever probably not. My heart is black or isn’t even there anymore.

    • karen says...

      You will find your happiness soon and recover from the hurt trust me .

  16. Jess says...

    Hi, I’m almost 27 and feel like I will never find someone worth marrying. I have been in bad relationships and have wasted my time with them. I am glad that I finally let those relationships go, but I’m so terrified of ending up alone. I still want to get married and have kids but it’s so discouraging out in the dating world. :(

    • Garima says...

      Jess i dont know what to say..i am also in the same boat..and to be honest really exhausted of putting myself out there..i dont know why things are not working for me ..its very depressing and the less i want ot think about it the more i think about this whole thing.people keep saying i willl meet him one day but i losing hope to be honest and it hurts so much

    • lucy says...

      I am on the same boat. I just don’t know anymore.

    • Jess says...

      Garima, I know how you feel believe me. There’s days where I just tell myself that I don’t want to meet anyone or date anyone anymore. I’ve gone on a couple dates in the last couple of months but I seem to attract the guys that aren’t seeking commitment. I’ve wasted lots of time with my exes, but now I just go on dates and if the guy isn’t seeking commitment I just cut them off. Still haven’t met anyone I would consider marrying but I still have a tiny bit of hope maybe I will meet my soulmate one day.

  17. Ree says...

    I know it’s stupid, but I’m 18 and I have a severe fear of forever being without my soulmate. This fear stems from my childhood where I witnessed a number of marriages not working out, my mom’s included, mainly due to the men. Due to that I grew up with a terrible mistrust in men and became a very big man-hater, which I’m doing my best to stop in recent years. I just finished High School and while I’m used to being “the girl no one wants to date” I fear that I will really never be able to be in a relationship. My parents now, my mom and my step-dad, are going through a really bad rough spot in which they both love one another, but their perpetually angry at each other. They run to me to complain about the other and never heed my advice. This doesn’t help my fear of never being able to find anyone. I just want them to see that they are lucky and to stop acting like they’re still married to their ex’s and to stop treating each other like they have to be together instead of want to…and I just want to witness a good marriage…I just want some hope because I’m terrified that there is none for someone like me.

    Sorry for my little rant…I just wanted someone to listen to me, thank you.
    R

    • I feel the same way too as your, I am 28 years of age, I was in a relationship for five year but we break up because my boyfriend cheated on me by getting another girl pregnant. It been one year six months now I have been single, I feel bad everyday, as my age 28 years and I don’t have any kids it makes me sick everyday when I think about it. I have come across lot of guys but after first or second date they won’t call or come, I have been thinking maybe it because I never agree to have seen with than, or maybe because I am too small and thin in the body, if you see me I look like 17, 18 year old person, people never believe me when I tell them I am 28 years of age. I am so worried, but I always say to myself people move out of your life to chance to your soul mate, so I just keep the hope and faith that one day I will find the perfect person that will still forever.

    • S says...

      Hey there.. Well I am suffering from somewhat same situation.. No my parents are not divorced but.. They r neither the kind of match I would appreciate. . And the problem with me is that I (although 17) am in a terrible fear that if, by chance, I indulge into arranged marriage, I surely gonna end up being in a relationship like their’s. . And, I just don’t know why, maybe because I am not beautiful and kinda a book worm , but people around me are like “the girl no one wants to date”. … And I am in this constant fear that I am going to end up messing my life..

  18. It’s taken 27 years to even BEGIN to come terms with the fact that this aspect of my life is almost entirely out of my hands… Unlike other things (career, where you live, etc.), I believe this is completely up to fate and you just have to trust that it will happen in it’s own due time.

    Super super easier said than done, but a tip – whenever I feel the fear creep up (and I think it’s normal/healthy that it does on occasion, no matter how satisfied you may feel about all other aspects of your life 99% of the time), I make a mental checklist of things I am grateful for. I always include even the most random things – ex: “I’m thankful that I have healthy vision so I can see the beauty in the world (and watch movies/read books!)”

    Seriously, it helps! One word: perspective. xx

    Check out my blog! http://whatwetalkaboutwhen.tumblr.com/

  19. I just turned 24, and this is something I worry about from time to time. This post reminds me that I will meet my person at the right time! Until then I just focus on enjoying my life!

  20. I know that this discussion took place years ago, but for me it is now :) I think it is perfectly possible one does not ever meet his/her soulmate. I am 31 and single. I have been single for 3 years now and over the last year, I didn’t even meet any guys who wouldn’t be married or with whom I had at least a remote connection. I think simply some people are to lead loveless, lonely lives so that the rest of you is reminded every day how lucky you actually are …

    • Sam says...

      We’re rowing the same boat, wanna get married?

  21. Q says...

    Hi there! Just discovered your blog, this being my first read. I totally relate, as most women do. It’s really difficult to stumble into your upper twenties, coming out of a messy early twenties, with an enormous amount of societal pressure attached to your age. Unfortunately, as women, it’s nearly impossible to escape the never ending worry trap of finding a partner before its “too late.” And we all suffer from it. We all absorb the energy associated with it.

    A lot of us waste so much time attempting to fulfill expectations, forcing things to work, settling, and accepting the unacceptable as an alternate option to being alone. Sadly, many of us are willing to sacrifice our ideal situation out of fear, while only some of us strike gold and truly find a great match. I wish that more of us were empowered to embrace our independence and our age, own turning 30 instead being terrified of it, and celebrate these beliefs with other women.

    Reality is, you will most likely find a great person to marry, on your own timeline. And its up to you to define what makes him your soulmate. I always liked this quote by Elizabeth Gilbert: “People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.”

  22. It is possible to meet the soulmate, let me tell you that they do exist, like I found mine through this 100% free dating site in USA called MeetOutside, when we met for the first time after talking on phone our hands just met and we have always held them, although after marriage there are ups and downs but life is always good with love around.

  23. I am 19 years old and I am in love. I don’t know how love is supposed to go, but I feel like I am in love. We fight all the time, but we are never really mad at each other. We live in different towns, it really takes a toll on what we are trying to accomplish. Maybe i’m not in love, but I remember the first day and moment I ever saw him, I remember everything about him, like a movie in my head that just keeps playing. I wish I could understand the process relationships go through, or maybe I’m just trying to hard. This post made me feel like maybe it will happen, but if it doesn’t I have a lot of time on my hands to find someone new. Thank you.

  24. I AM INTO MY LEAVE MY MAN ALONE WHEN I CONTACTED UPESA FOR A SPELL LOVE THAT WILL HELP ME WIN MY HUSBAND BACK AND HAVE A LOVE SPELL CASTING WITH DR. UPESA EMAIL:UPESALOVETEMPLE@GMAIL.COM AND TODAY MY HUSBAND EMAILED ME AND ALSO CALLAS ME YESTERDAY ASKING FOR MY FORGIVENESS. THIS IS ON THE 4TH DAY OF THE 1ST SPELL AND HE IS ALREADY CONTACTING ME. WOW, I WAS…

  25. I AM INTO MY LEAVE MY MAN ALONE WHEN I CONTACTED UPESA FOR A SPELL LOVE THAT WILL HELP ME WIN MY HUSBAND BACK AND HAVE A LOVE SPELL CASTING WITH DR. UPESA EMAIL:UPESALOVETEMPLE@GMAIL.COM AND TODAY MY HUSBAND EMAILED ME AND ALSO CALLAS ME YESTERDAY ASKING FOR MY FORGIVENESS. THIS IS ON THE 4TH DAY OF THE 1ST SPELL AND HE IS ALREADY CONTACTING ME. WOW, I WAS…

  26. My husband broke up with me a month ago because of the little misunderstanding will had, he was dating other young lady and he never take me out again he was totally changed and he never listen to any thing i told him. one day he came and told me he is bringing in other lady in our home, i was so frustrated so when i came across Dr.airiohuodion (airiohuodiontemple@gmail.com) how he use to rebuild broken home and make their family to reunite together again, so i quickly email him and explain all my problem to him and he guarantee me that my husband will definable want me back after the reunite spell. After everything my husband (SAM) came back to tell me he still love and cherish me that he promise never to cheat on me any more i was so happy and i quickly email Dr.airiohuodion (airiohuodiontemple@gmail.com) and thank him for the wonderful spell, he was God sent and if you need his helping hand contact his direct email at.(airiohuodiontemple@gmail.com).

  27. My husband broke up with me a month ago because of the little misunderstanding will had, he was dating other young lady and he never take me out again he was totally changed and he never listen to any thing i told him. one day he came and told me he is bringing in other lady in our home, i was so frustrated so when i came across Dr.airiohuodion (airiohuodiontemple@gmail.com) how he use to rebuild broken home and make their family to reunite together again, so i quickly email him and explain all my problem to him and he guarantee me that my husband will definable want me back after the reunite spell. After everything my husband (SAM) came back to tell me he still love and cherish me that he promise never to cheat on me any more i was so happy and i quickly email Dr.airiohuodion (airiohuodiontemple@gmail.com) and thank him for the wonderful spell, he was God sent and if you need his helping hand contact his direct email at.(airiohuodiontemple@gmail.com).

  28. I’m 29 and I just left my bf of 1 1/2 years…..my first serious boyfriend, because he wasn’t comfortable with intimacy, lied all the time, treated me poorly and was scared of any sort of comittment. Everyone tells me I”m out of time. I spent my 20’s getting a masters degree, becoming a naval officer, and starting a career. I want to meet someone, but I don’t want to settle for a man whose only half in/half out with me. Tired of being told I waited too long and its too late for me. :-(

  29. Thank you Dr.Paul for helping me to reunite my relationship just within the period of 48 hours. I can still remember those period when i was having problems with my lover but today through the help of your great powers i am having joy in my relationship.thank you very much Dr Paul you can contact him for help through his email heritagespelltemple@gmail.com

  30. i will like to share my testimony to you all.i just got married to my husband about a year ago we start having problems at home like we stop sleeping on the same bed,fighting about little things he always comes home late at night,drinking too much and sleeping with other women out side.i have never love any man in my life except him.he is the father of my children and i don’t want to loose him because we have worked so hard together to become what we are and have today.few month ago he now decided to live me and the kid,being a single mother can be hard sometimes and so i have nobody to turn to and i was heart broken.i called my mom and explain every thing to her,my mother told me about Dr Jatto how he helped her solve the problem between her and my dad i was surprise about it because they have been without each other for three and a half years and it was like a miracle how they came back to each other.i was directed to Dr Jatto and explain everything to him,so he promise me not to worry that he will cast a spell and make things come back to how we where so much in love again and that it was another female spirit that was controlling my husband.he told me that my problem will be solved within two days if i believe i said OK.So he cast a spell for me and after two days my love came back asking me to forgive him.i Am so happy now. so that why i decided to share my experience with every body that have such problem contact him email. drjattosplltemple@gmail.com
    narol denison

    1. GETTING YOUR EX LOVER BACK.
    2. WINNING LOTTERIES.
    3. CHILD BEARING.
    4. BREAKING OF GENERATION COURSE.
    5. GETTING OF JOB.
    6. JOB PROMOTION.
    7. MONEY SPELL.
    8. SPIRITUAL PROTECTION.
    9. HERBAL CARE.
    10. BEAUTY SPELL.

  31. i have interesting thing to tell about a great man name Dr Saibaba for what he did for me, this great man help me to get back my love within few hours without delay this man help me to get back my man who left me just because he find another lady but thanks to this great man who inter vain in the matter,when i contacted this great man he told me that i should not worry that i am going to get him back,i now said that i should give a try that spiritual people are real so i now did what he ask me to do,to my greatest surprise my man call me and told me that he love me that he is so sorry for what he did to me so now i am so happy with him he now love me more than before so my friend out there i want you to know this spiritual man can help me you to get back your lover without no delay thanks to this great man Dr Saibaba so if you need is help contact him on email templesaibaba@yahoo.com

  32. i just want to start this way by giving a huge thanks to this vashikaran temple for what he has just done today in my life . at first i thought it won,t work because many has failed me before but on a second thought i said let me just try and to my best surprises Michael my husband that said and insist he has nothing to do with me and my family called me immediately this great man DR vashikaran of vashikarantemple@gmail.com) cast a love spell on him and started begging for forgiveness well i love him so much and at once i accepted him back and today we are both living in pace and harmony, all the same the glory is to this man DR vashikaran of vashikarantemple@gmail.com DOC I THANK YOU once again for you are worthy of all the thanks in my mouth today and forever am grateful and shall ever be to you . i also want to say if you are out there passing through a similar stuff or issues you can contact him today and i bi live him will also help you out

  33. Hey,

    Thankfully I am already married and luckily to love of my life. But few years before this actually happened and when we were struggling to convince his parents I had a thought should I stop trying may be this is not THE LOVE, may be something is yet to come. But then suddenly it happened one day. Now when I look back it makes me feel happy we tried so hard coz he is the one for me :). Well now I am worried on the same front for my brother who in the town is one of the most eligible bachelor but still single. He like me is scared at the thought of getting into a marriage arranged by parents, I wish he gets a good loving and understanding partner, I hope he gets lucky soon. Do share some tips to get through this time.

  34. I am 19 and I am really worried about this. I have a rare syndrome that effects my speech so I have a speech impairment. And other health issues. And I am just concerned that I wont find a guy who can see past all of that and see the real me. And love and want me.

  35. I read your blogs regularly. Your humoristic way is amusing, continue the good work!Detox Drinks

  36. I am a 30 year old single mom who has never been married. Its hard to admit but I have never been loved by a man, its true. I was so adamant about falling in love that I fell for an alcoholic. Having my daughter is what saved me from that chapter of my life. I am now in school and have been for two and half years. I have not dated in that long either. At first, it was a dating vacation to me so I could learn my role as a new Mother… Now, I feel plenty broke in with that role with my amazing 3 year old keeping me on my toes and I have begun to catch myself worrying that love just isn’t in the cards for me. I have never had a man love me- harsh reality, but the worry of it never happening well that’s even worse. I want to believe in soul mates or the “one”, but lately I just catch myself trying to let it all go and continue on this journey solo. I have an amazing lil one that gives me wondrous love and joy unspeakable, and truly I am blessed. So, I am hoping these longings of romance will fade with time.

  37. Last three weeks ago i lost my job and i started seeking for another good job and i have been to many interview but i was not giving a job so one day i saw a testimony on the internet on how Ekaka help someone to get a good job so i have to contact him on his email: ekakaspelltemple@yahoo.com and he told me what i need to do and after 2days all the place i have attended interview they all started calling me and i was confuse because i do not know the right one so i have to call Dr. Ekaka again to know the right place i need to work so he told me how i am going to know the right one which i did and now i am the happiest person on earth.

  38. Totally unique stuff is here really amazing!!!
    visit us

  39. Inconceivable points. Sound arguments. Keep going the truly amazing work.click here

  40. I posting this comment for those who have not met with dr marnish to contact him now for he solves all relationship problem between couples or you can also call his mobile +15036626930 i want to thank Dr Marnish for Break Them Up and Reunite Us lover spell he did for me last week. I’m so grateful for the effort dr.marnish@yahoo.com have put into my relationship case. I will always be grateful. i can see the love spell working out perfectly
    Rasasi Josh

  41. I love this post. (I love all your posts jo :) I went through the exact same worry when I was 29. I was living in London and the dating scene was brutal, everyone was married or nuts! I had given up on men and had decided to move back to Australia for a simpler life, but before I went back I had a wedding to attend in Spain and I thought I would stay 3 nights in Barcelona on my way down to the wedding. Those 3 nights in Barcelona changed my life. I met the most amazing man (an Argentinian who was working in France and on holiday in Spain). Long story short we have now been together 18months, living together and very much in love. PS. I know so many couples who have met backpacking, I highly recommend it.

  42. Hi, having read this awesome written piece I’m also pleased to fairly share my familiarity here with colleagues.
    seo services

  43. I’m impressed with the special and informative contents that you just offer in such short timing.auto insurance

  44. Dr egbenakhue am so grateful, through the powerful money spell i purchased from you
    last week i was able to apply for a loan from the bank for both to start my own
    business and also to buy my family a house, i cant imagine yesterday i received a
    call from the bank notifying me that my loan on R4.2million was approved, i don’t
    know how to thank you but your powers are beyond human imagination,if you need his
    assistance contact him via egbenakhuespelltemple@gmail.com

  45. I am very happy, I wish to share my testimonies with the general public about what this man called Dr Adodo has just done for me , this man has just brought back my lost Ex husband to me with his great spell, i was married to this man called Steven we were together for a long time and we loved our self’s but when i was unable to give he a child for 2 years he left me and told me he can’t continue anymore then i was now looking for ways to get him back until a friend of mine told me about this man and gave his contact email (dradodojattotemple@yahoo.com) then you won’t believe this when i contacted this man on my problems he prepared this spell cast and bring my lost husband back, and after a month i miss my month and go for a test and the result stated am pregnant am happy today am a mother of a baby girl, thank you once again the great Dr Adodo for what you have done for me, if you are out there passing through this same kind of problems you can contact he today on his mail ( dradodojattotemple@yahoo.com) and he will also help you as well.

  46. I am very happy, I wish to share my testimonies with the general public about what this man called Dr Adodo has just done for me , this man has just brought back my lost Ex husband to me with his great spell, i was married to this man called Steven we were together for a long time and we loved our self’s but when i was unable to give he a child for 2 years he left me and told me he can’t continue anymore then i was now looking for ways to get him back until a friend of mine told me about this man and gave his contact email (dradodojattotemple@yahoo.com) then you won’t believe this when i contacted this man on my problems he prepared this spell cast and bring my lost husband back, and after a month i miss my month and go for a test and the result stated am pregnant am happy today am a mother of a baby girl, thank you once again the great Dr Adodo for what you have done for me, if you are out there passing through this same kind of problems you can contact he today on his mail ( dradodojattotemple@yahoo.com) and he will also help you as well.

  47. My life almost got destroyed, Thanks to the God sent OSHOGUM who rescued me out of my marriage problems NOW, to achieve all that you desire in life to live a happy life, contact great Dr oshogun temple for a betterment of life. i am very happy today to tell the world how great he is because how of much he help me, bring me out of shame and make me smile again just when i thought my life has be concluded in pain and miserable because my man left me when i was two week pregnant then i was advice by my doctor not to work due to my health challenge else i will lose my baby. so i use all the money i have to take care of my unborn child and my self till the seventh months of my pregnancy then i was broke and in pain. life was so difficult till i melt an old college friend who told me about her past life problem and how great Dr oshogum help her. then i ask her how to meet or contact the man and she gave me oshogumspelltemple@live.com and His +2348189075265 to contact him. though i never believe he can help me because i have meet some persons before now and they did not help me. Dr oshogun demanded for items to help me bring my man back though i was broke i have to meet my mother to help me because i really love my man and he is working and earn well. so did all that DR oshogum ask me to do, I was very shocked when Daniel called four days after i sent Dr oshogum the items money. He apologies for all he has done wrong and i should allow him back to my heart. sincerely i am very happy that we are together and my child now know and also live with his dad. sir the Great Dr i am very grateful and happy for what you have done for me. To those that have marriage, relationship or health problem, I will advise you to contact Dr oshogum now via email oshogumspelltemple@live.com or call +2348189075265 because he has done wonders in my life and i believe he can help you out in any problem.
    contact him now via email oshogumspelltemple@live.com or call +2348189075265

  48. My Life can be very displeasing especially when we loose the ones we love and cherish so much.My husband abandoned me and my 2 kids for 2 years he said he wanted new adventures.I asked what i had done wrong but he said nothing.He continued paying our bills but moved in with another woman i was so frustrated and a times i will cry all night because i needed my husband by my side. all thanks to salamispiritualspelltemple@gmail.com, i was nearly loosing hope until i saw an article on how master james cast a love spell to make lovers come back. There is no harm in trying, i said to my self. i contacted him via email and after 24 hrs my story changed. words will not be enough to appreciate what he has done for me. i have promised to share the testimony as long as i live because he brought back happiness and joy into my life.If you having any kind of problem in your relationship and you need your man back i RECOMMEND master james .please do contact him directly on salamispiritualspelltemple@gmail.com, Email him on: salamispiritualspelltemple@gmail.com

  49. I am out here to spreed this good news to the entire world on how i got my ex lover back.I was going crazy when my love left me for another woman,l in a couple of months ago,But when i meet a friend that introduce me to Dr kate the great spell-caster,I narrated my problem to Dr kate about how my ex love left me and also how i needed to get a job in a very big company.He only said to me that i have come to the right place were i will be getting my heart desire without any side effect.He told me what i need to do,After it was been done,In the next 2 days, My love called me on the phone and was apologizing for living me before now and also in the next one week after my love called me to plead for forgiveness,I was called for interview in my desired company were i apply for to work as a manager,I am so happy and overwhelmed that i have to tell this to the entire world to contact Dr kate at the following email address and get all your problems solved..No problem is too big for him to solve.Email him on: katelovespell@hotmail.com ,and all your problems will be solved and you will be glad at last.

  50. I am out here to spreed this good news to the entire world on how i got my ex lover back.I was going crazy when my love left me for another woman,l in a couple of months ago,But when i meet a friend that introduce me to Dr kate the great spell-caster,I narrated my problem to Dr kate about how my ex love left me and also how i needed to get a job in a very big company.He only said to me that i have come to the right place were i will be getting my heart desire without any side effect.He told me what i need to do,After it was been done,In the next 2 days, My love called me on the phone and was apologizing for living me before now and also in the next one week after my love called me to plead for forgiveness,I was called for interview in my desired company were i apply for to work as a manager,I am so happy and overwhelmed that i have to tell this to the entire world to contact Dr kate at the following email address and get all your problems solved..No problem is too big for him to solve.Email him on: katelovespell@hotmail.com ,and all your problems will be solved and you will be glad at last.

  51. My name is Mara. i am here to tell you a true life story of my life, i am a woman who was once married with 2kids and one day i was at home when i decover that there is unfaithfulness in my husband, so i decided to watch what he is up to and one day on my way to visit a friend of my, i found my husband and my best friend in a sitting room kissing and smooching their self and i got angry at once so i slap the face of my husband and i left when i got home, in the evening of it, my husband came with his mother and they both tell me that am a problem to them i was so confused thinking i have to recieve apologies from him but it was not the way i think so the next day he got up and tell me to my face that i should leave his house. i was so ashamed of him and i decided to do some thing real bad but did work so one day i saw a contact on the internet and i contacted the email address and a man told me all about my troubles and what i need to do and now am happy, and my husband came beging on his kneels actually the Dr Sango told me that a woman will confess and my mother in law confessed to me that she was responsible for all the troubles of my life and my husband now is happy with me. thank you very much sir the almighty will guard u and bless you for me. please women out there reach him via emial sangospelltemple@gmail.com

  52. I have read a lot of the comments here. I am a 34 year old guy in upstate NY. I have thought about this for a few years. I am new to the area that I am living in. The only thing here seems to be going to bars and drinking. I don’t drink and I hate bars. I would love to meet a wonderful woman someday and get married and settle down. At this point of my life I really question if that is going to happen for me.

  53. I have read a lot of the comments here. I am a 34 year old guy in upstate NY. I have thought about this for a few years. I am new to the area that I am living in. The only thing here seems to be going to bars and drinking. I don’t drink and I hate bars. I would love to meet a wonderful woman someday and get married and settle down. At this point of my life I really question if that is going to happen for me.

  54. Of course I worry, just like anyone in my or your situation did! It’s easier said than done to think ”Don’t worry, be happy!”.

  55. Older Dating Online for single seniors who are looking for love or friendships online. Leading senior dating agency in the UK and Australia for the over 50 s!

  56. I’m 17 but I do worry abt not being able to get married or attract anyone sigh

  57. After 8 years relationship with my boyfriend, he changed suddenly and stopped contacting me regularly, he would come up with excuses of not seeing me all the time. He stopped answering my calls and my sms and he stopped seeing me regularly. I then started catching him with different girls friends several times but every time he would say that he love me and that he needed some time to think about our relationship. But after l contacted Dr. TRUST of spell cast temple he cast a love spell and after a day, my boyfriend started contacting me regularly and we moved in together after a few months and he was more open to me than before and he started spending more time with me than his friends. We eventually got married and we now have been married happily for 3 years with a son. Ever since Dr. TRUST of ULTIMATESPELLCAST@GMAIL.COM helped me, my partner is very stable, faithful and closer to me than before. My Facebook address is paul kite

  58. HI My Name is Jennifer , I wish to share my testimonies with the general public about what this man called dr ABULU of( abuluspiritualtemple@yahoo.com has just done for me , this man has just brought back my lost family to me with his great spell, I was married to this man called James we were together for a long time and we loved our self’s but when I was unable to give he a child for 2 years he left me and told me he can’t continue anymore then I was now looking for ways to get he back until a friend of mine told me about this man and gave his contact email abuluspiritualtemple@yahoo.com) then you wont believe this when I contacted this man on my problems he prepared this spell cast and bring my lost husband back and after a month I miss my month and go for a test and the result stated am pregnant am happy today am a mother a baby girl, thank you once again the great ABULU for what you have done for me, if you are out there passing through this same kind of problems you can contact he today on his mail (abuluspiritualtemple@yahoo.com or his website, http://abuluspiritualtemple.webs.com and he will also help you as well.

  59. i’m a 36 yo male from aus i got divorced a few years ago because of an unfaithful partner, i was lucky to get majority custody of my daughter and have dated a fair bit but i feel like im at an age where i’m too old for alot of girls and all the decent women my age are taken, i cant go out as often as others because of my daughter (which doesn’t bother me but limits opportunity) and only seem to meet girls with issues online (no offence to those who don’t) i’m fairly happy alone but love the idea of having an awesome partner, companionship is great, but it feels as though i will wind up solo,really hope i’m wrong :)

  60. Am happy to share this testimony about this great man called Dr Iwajowa. I am Sandra from California , my husband had an affair with another lady for almost 10 years now and it was the worse thing that ever happened to our marriage. I was forced to take a good hard look at MY behavior in the marriage and I came to realize that I was partly to blame for his affair. I had become emotionally unavailable to him and when something good or bad happened in my life, I called my friends instead of my husband. I had stopped allowing him to love me and to support me and he felt as if I no longer needed him. As a musician on the road with his band, it became to much temptation for him when a girl he met on road became interested in him and was more than available for him emotionally and physically. Once I really started to examine my behavior, I realized that I had as much work to do as he did. When going through all theses problem i came across Dr Iwajowa then i explained things to him. after explanation to him, he told me what to do by bringing back my husband so i decided to follow the rules which he gave to me. Now, My husband cut all tires with his other woman and became committed to working on our marriage to save it. Today, we have a beautiful son, another on the way in a couple weeks, we own our home, and have a fuller, happier life than we ever imagined. After i came across the testimony made by Julie about how this man of spirit brought back her ex husband for more than ten years in marriage. so my if you are in such pain and you don’t no what to do you can contact this great man for help i promise you all he will help you the way he helped me so via Email IWAJOWATELLERSPELL@YAHOO.COM or call him +2347030410643

  61. i met someone last year and it’s almost a year now of dating.. i really feel like he’s the one. but things keep getting in our way and now he’s leaving..it’s scary that i don’t know when i’ll feel the same way again…what are the odds…

  62. viewers, i want to use this little of my testimony to tell everybody about how Dr. Moses help me make my home…
    My name is Anna from Australia, to caught it all shot i was having a family problems my husband left me because i was not able to give him a child, i have know other solution than to start sicking for help praying and fasting for God to help me bring back my husband and to have a child of my own, so one day i saw Dr. Moses name on the internet with his email address (thegodsofsolution@gmail.com) when i saw this email address i never loose any hope again, i contacted him for help, to end the story he help me bring back my husband to me under four days and to my greatest surprise he prophesied and said i we have my own child and celebrate with others as a mother, am three months pregnant now and my husband is now with me without any problem, please viewers help me to thank Dr. Moses Iyere for making my home a happy one. Please contact Dr. Moses Iyere at (thegodsofsolution@gmail.com) he is a good man and a prophet, he can help
    you in any kind of problems please don’t pass this email address if you really want your problems to be solved thanks..

  63. Nah. Soulmates don’t exist. Why would I waste time looking for something that doesn’t exist in the first place? Seems silly to me.

  64. Hi JOanna,

    I find this so heart warming. Since all you wrote above is so true and I can relate to every detail of it. Including my Mom who’s sure as hell she’s going to have one of a kind, head turner, your daughter is so lucky to have him, son in law.

    Which is comforting, since I dont have to depressed for both of us.

    And I know all you wrote above perhaps sounds a little silly, but to those who bear those feelings it’s NOT.

    And I guess the problem that Im facing is common.

    Im too idealist to settle, but I havent got any chance for the right guy. The right guy rarely appear, when they do they’re either engaged, married with kids, over 40 or simply not interested in me.

    Those who swooned over me are simply not a guy that I fall for and eager to share my life with.

    Its not that I am puting the centre of my life in marriage. But I truly am longing to find the right person to share my journey. And the thought that maybe am not gonna find him is scary.

  65. I am 47, divorced and enjoy my ife with my two kids. I am not needy and have been single for 6 years. There are no prospects in sight for me which at times is disheartening but other times I have grow used to my independence. I however I am attractive and better shape than most other women my age which makes me a target to get hit on for sex, especially by married men, which makes me ill…like I am not deserving to be approached by someone available with pure intentions. It frustrates me if I let it, but lately I lie to myself and say I don’t want to find love so I can feel like I am living like this by choice :(

  66. I am 47, divorced and enjoy my ife with my two kids. I am not needy and have been single for 6 years. There are no prospects in sight for me which at times is disheartening but other times I have grow used to my independence. I however I am attractive and better shape than most other women my age which makes me a target to get hit on for sex, especially by married men, which makes me ill…like I am not deserving to be approached by someone available with pure intentions. It frustrates me if I let it, but lately I lie to myself and say I don’t want to find love so I can feel like I am living like this by choice :(

  67. First of all,Am just short of words i don’t know what to say,am so grateful to Dr Osaze for what he has done for me at first i thought he was a scam,But i just decided to contact him then he told me that my lover will be back to my arms within 48hours.Really when the 48hours completed my lover called me and said he was sorry,i was so happy that my lover who left me for over 4years called me,Now we are together he can’t do without me he always wants me to be by his side.now he love’s me and he does not want anything to hurt me anymore.My lover even bought me a new car and a gold wristwatch.And now i also have access to his account to prove that he will never leave me alone am so happy all thanks goes to Dr Love .if you want to contact him for help here his is private mail spirituallove@hotmail.com

    Country:Arizona USA

  68. I just looked up this post after remembering reading it a while ago. I also just read through all of the comments (skimming over the ones where the repliers wrote “I never worried about this!”… lucky girls). After being let down again by a different guy I thought would be “the one”, I have little hope for what will come next. I know I’m still young, I have just finished a lot of university and am about to embark on a job search, and I am preparing to travel across Europe by myself for a few months. I am in what most people would call “the perfect situation to experience being single and discover myself”, which I fully intend to do. I just think there will be a part of me that won’t be complete until I’m validated by a man who truly wants to spend the rest of his life with me. I am going to try my best to embrace my current singleness, and hope that I am a good enough person to find true love eventually. But for now… it’s rough.

  69. Good post…… Thanks for sharing your experience with us….. I got how we feel on first dating and how different would that year be?” That awesome quote reveals how much we worry about our dating lives and when we could be relaxing and enjoying other parts of our lives.
    Soul Mate Book

  70. Joanna, I read this post when I get frustrated. Thanks.

  71. I want to start first by saying a big “thank you” to Ishvara! There are a bunch of nuts out there just trying to make a fast buck, but you are legitimate! I prayed before I went online that God would send me exactly where I needed to go to find help for my problems in the love department, and I mean I went straight to your site and felt it was the place I needed to be. I’m forever grateful! Ishvara is of God, and his gifts come from God, not some evil or ego-centered place. Of that I am certain, and my love problems have already started to improve. Thank you thank you ishvaratemple@yahoo.com

  72. I never worried about this in my 20’s. Then came my 30’s….. still did not worry about it. I dated one person for quite a while and we had a daughter, but the relationship did not work out. Which is fine, because he was definitely not for me.
    Now… I am 43. Still single. Never married. I did not worry about it at 41, met someone at 42 and fell completely head over heals. Never thought it would happen. It did not work out. Now, I am beginning to wonder. I am exhausted from the responsibility of life and doing everything myself. I work full time (successful job), own my own home, do the cooking, the cleaning, the car pooling, I do everything. But, I do this alone. I get out from time to time, to do the things I really enjoy doing. I have fun, but I am lonely. It is almost as if this last relationship really opened my eyes to how much I would love to have someone in my life. Someone to come home to. Someone to share my life with. So, to be honest, I am at a point I feel very broken. I am an amazing person, I know this, but life is pretty hard when you have to go it alone. My parents were married for 52 years until my mother passed away, so I know what a good successful happy marriage should be… I just cannot seem to find anyone for me.

  73. I was in a relationship from 16-20 and it only served to take me away from myself. I was devastated with a capital D when we broke up, but went to therapy and learned about myself for the first time in my life. When I stopped worrying and started enjoying my life, I met an amazing man and began a relationship in which worry has no place- I never worry about where we’re going and if he hasn’t contacted me by 5 pm, etc (which is stupid, but something I worried about when I was dating around). I think maybe this is due to the fact that his parents would disown him if he ever married me, and he has always said he would never let it get to that point because he has too much respect for them to disregard them (thus meaning he would probably break up with me). At first this bothered me, but then I got my head back and realized that I’m 21 and I LOVE spending time with this person. I am one of those people who believes that we are meant to have some people stay in our lives to teach lessons, and some who leave fairly quickly when the lesson is learned. I’m not sure which he is, but I am surrendering to it and having a great time. NO WORRIES :)

  74. It’s really sad that women are so preoccupied with marriage and worry that they won’t find anyone. Why are so many women focused on that? Why not dream and worry about accomplishing something? The purpose of women’s wife should not finding a man and procreate. I feel like a lot of women don’t have any meaningful careers and they just hope to find someone who would provide them all the material luxuries that they will never be able to earn themselves or fill the void of having a boring uneventful life. These women are truly pathetic.

  75. Ok, I know I’m a year late with this reply but I felt so touched reading everyone’s different stories that I’d like to add my own, even if it is crushingly sad…

    I thought I met the love of my life two years ago. (In fact, I still feel like he’s the love of my life). We dated for a year even though he said he wasn’t ready to be in a serious relationship with anyone. He broke up with me because he said he wasn’t “able to give [me] everything [I] needed”. Mind you, this is his opinion. I kept trying to tell him I didn’t need anything but him. So I tried to forget about him. He wanted to remain friends. Then suddenly, he was diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer. I’m devastated and all I want is to be around him. But he has a million people who want to be around him all the time and he doesn’t have the energy to see everyone, much less and ex like me. Sigh. It feels like I’m falling upside down.

  76. Ok, I know I’m a year late with this reply but I felt so touched reading everyone’s different stories that I’d like to add my own, even if it is crushingly sad…

    I thought I met the love of my life two years ago. (In fact, I still feel like he’s the love of my life). We dated for a year even though he said he wasn’t ready to be in a serious relationship with anyone. He broke up with me because he said he wasn’t “able to give [me] everything [I] needed”. Mind you, this is his opinion. I kept trying to tell him I didn’t need anything but him. So I tried to forget about him. He wanted to remain friends. Then suddenly, he was diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer. I’m devastated and all I want is to be around him. But he has a million people who want to be around him all the time and he doesn’t have the energy to see everyone, much less and ex like me. Sigh. It feels like I’m falling upside down.

  77. Thats a great question… I am almost 26, and its close to twelve months since I last even went on a date. I continually meet amazing men, but they are all married or in long term relationships. Growing up, I never assumed I would meet someone – while my parents are still married after 36 years, a lot of my mom’s friends never married, never had children and remained. In some ways this gave me a different insight – I realised that not everyone lives happily ever after with Prince Charming, and that while some of these women were happy to be single some of them really weren’t.
    In the last few years, the reality that I might never met anyone, or fall in love, or have children has become very real, and it makes me so sad. I try to focus on my work, my family and friends, finding new activities and opportunities, but there is definitely a loneliness in my life, and as much as I hate to think it, I keep wondering what is wrong with me.

  78. Hi Joanna,

    I’ve read your first date post – but how did you meet Alex? I’ve always been curious! You two seem to have a beautiful partnership and kind of comradery.

    Jess
    http://inanutshell.ca

  79. Anonymous says...

    I think my problem is that I’ve built up a perfect person and a perfect scenario in my head for what it will be like.. and im completley terrified now that i’ll have to settle for anything less. I know that everyone can find somebody, I just know that I personally want a lot more than that. “I’m looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can’t-live-without-each-other love.” – Carrie Bradshaw, my favourite actor.

  80. I like this post. I need more people to tell me these kinds of things.

    I’m almost 25, never dated anyone (beyond a couple dates with a couple of guys) and have zero prospects right now. A part of me is completely ok with this, as I tend to view relationships as giving up a part of myself, rather than sharing. However, a part of me is really frustrated because I don’t think there’s anything wrong with me. I’m intelligent, not unattractive etc etc. I’m not even looking for marriage or to settle down, per se. I just want someone to be able to turn to. I also am slowly starting to get pressure from my family back home, because I’m the one single one and that apparently equates with doing something wrong.

    I know everyone says you won’t find someone until you stop looking/expecting it, but I find this so hard to follow. I don’t really believe in fate, so how does it happen unless you make it happen? However, while I say I am not expecting/looking for it, but I probably am subconsciously. Maybe I should try harder to take everyone’s advice :).

    Most of the time, I’m (mostly) fine with being single. But then the rest of the time I freak out because, if i haven’t found anyone by now, how am I going to find anyone ever?

  81. I used to read your blog and stumbled upon it again today…let’s just say I’m doing some catch up!

    This post is kind of sad to me because I am 37 and still single..waaah waaaaaah. I had a very long relationship with a guy that was absolutely not right for me and I feel like I might have passed ‘the one’ along the way. I’m not really too sad about it, but I do think about it from time to time. I’m very independent and love doing things by myself, but there comes a time when you just want to hang out with a cute guy that ‘gets you’, y’know?

  82. Anonymous says...

    I am currently in a relationship since a year and 2 months and i am suffering , i am crying the hell out of me every night.My boyfriend was at first the perfect boyfriend and i always thought of him as being my soulmate.At that time i was telling him to give me more complimets and tell me that he loved me more often . But i now realised that those were stupid things which i asked for because now he is not the same anymore. He kinda turned into a cold fish and now i am the desperate one that would do anything for him and i would give anything for him to be the same person like in the beginning . I would like people to give me some advice because i feel so lonely in this situation . i tried to speak to him about this but everytime i tell him he says i am complaining. i am very sad every day :( please can somebody help me and tell me what could i possibly do for things to be the same as they used to? thank you in advance ! whoever will write me an answer is very kind .

  83. Anonymous says...

    I’m 42 and I have never been in a serious relationship. Im quite good-looking, thin, smart, sweet, friendly, very succesful in my career, and I have good values and moral. I’m anything but a slut, but men mostly approach me for one-night stands or short affairs. I’ve had many in the past, but want something solid, so nowadays I rush off the players. The result is that I am alone. I tried everything, been on online dating sites for well over a decade, hobbies, community service, traveling solo, asked my friends to set me up, even had therapy. People keep telling me that there is nothing wrong with me, but meanwhile I am becoming really desperate. I have given up all hope of ever starting a family.

  84. i found mine, i think i’m one of the lucky ones :)

  85. Wonderful post! Thank you for sharing :) The year I met my boyfriend, I had decided to be happy no matter what. I knew I was going to be with a wonderful guy, and said a silent prayer to God: “Thank You for taking care of my love life, and handling the timing. I’ll just be happy.” I took a trip to Alaska, went on a cruise, made great friends, and wrote a book after. A little over a month after the cruise, I met my man. When you’re relaxed and happy, that’s when you’re able to receive the magic into your life, and recognize the blessing when he stares you in the face.

  86. I met my husband on the internet, he was in London and I was in Vermillion, South Dakota! It seemed like I will never meet anyone I connect with. You think NYC is bad with competition, it’s worse when the only prospects are young frat boys and commitment-phobic law or medical students :)

    Anyway, it was meant to be and I so wish I would have known this, would have saved me from making a lot of very silly mistakes that I regret. But it’s the past and what’s in the past will stay there :)

  87. and ps, for some relevance: I am about to turn 30.

  88. What a lovely question. I ended up with someone whom I had loved from afar for 3 years (he was married to a friend’s sister). I was recovering from a breakup from another guy when he emailed and said he was getting a divorce. I have never grabbed a phone to call a man so quickly in my life! We have now been together for 3.5 years and are engaged to be married in May 2012. The best advice I could tell anyone is that you absolutely know when you absolutely know. The year before we were together, I would have spent less time mourning a bad relationship, and more time enjoying myself.

  89. To say that this post couldn’t have come at a better time is almost an understatement. It is perfect – I am at that transition point/quarter life crisis and was having all of these anxieties…. Your mom is so right, all it takes is one, and as long as you are content and love yourself up until that point, it will all be okay. Thank you for this :)

  90. I’m 31 and single, living in Tokyo (I’m Canadian)- Japan is one of the most difficult places for a foreign girl to get a boyfriend, so I’ve been single for soooo long. I just started to enjoy it lately, I know I won’t meet my soulmate in Japan (most likely not), so I’m just having FUN right now and focusing on my career and travels. I used to worry all the time, but I stopped worrying now. I think while traveling it’s hard to also build a solid relationship, so that can wait for after :)

  91. Catherine says...

    I’m 21 and haven’t dated anyone. I’m pretty worried (it keeps going on my mind everyday) recently that I’m not going to meet my soulmate.. :( I’m surrounded by happy couples, while I was just here a l o n e.

    I don’t know why, it’s just that I havent met anyone who attracts me.

    Or maybe no one is attracted to me?

  92. i recently discovered your blog and can’t get enough. love!

    i can definitely relate – i will be 28 this year and up until 4 months ago, i was worried that i would be single for the rest of my life. i always met guys that either weren’t quite right for me or that disappeared eventually.

    then 4 months ago, i was finishing my last year of law school and my focus was beginning to shift to the bar exam. the night of my last law school exam, i met a girlfriend for a drink, strictly to celebrate being done, not to man hunt. that night i met jack – my boyfriend now and love of my life. i can’t predict the future but i can see myself with him forever. to boot, jack is 32. i think the four-year age difference provides a good balance in maturity.

    if i had known that i was going to meet jack a year ago, i don’t think my feelings would be the same. i love that meeting him was such a surprise and what i needed at that exact moment. just thinking about it gives me butterflies again. xo

  93. Anonymous says...

    Jo-
    I read your blog everyday and couldn’t help but smile when I read this post. I’m 25 and have been single for over a year. I’ve tried online dating and have been set up with many “friends of friends” all with no luck. My friends and family all drop the same “It will happen when you least expect it” line- but as time goes by I’m starting to become more lonely and somewhat bitter…and slightly jaded. (Yes, I even gave the evil eye to a happy couple I saw holding hands and smiling in Target) I hate feeling this way because I am a believer in that thing called love- it is just so easy to lose hope. Thank you for this post, it made me feel a little less lonely knowing that I’m not the only one who has gone through a rut in the relationship department.
    -Lara

  94. This post really spoke to me. I recently broke up with the man that I thought was my “soulmate”. He ended it very suddenly after 4 years, and it has left me wondering what happened. I am about to turn 27 and feel like I am starting over very late in the game. Many of my friends are engaged, married, and are even starting to have children. I try to find comfort in the idea that maybe he wasn’t my soulmate, and if he is, then we will find our way back to each other at some point. I think he has some figuring out to do. It is hard being single again, and I am so stressed about re-entering the dating world – it is a scary place and I feel so out of touch!

  95. Joanna,
    This is something I think about frequently, although less so these days. My mom was married at 21, and stayed at home with all 4 of us, so that’s really all I knew. I’m 30 now, and up until recently I put a lot of pressure on myself – and allowed myself to feel a lot of pressure from society – to be married and have kids and a house and a dog and big cars. Once I allowed it to be ok to not want all that, so many things revealed themselves – like law school. Now I am happily single and enveloped in studying for the LSAT and investing a future about ME, not some made-up white knight. :) I also have a badass tattoo that says ‘I will have here but one mistress and no master.’ (A quote from Queen Elizabeth I). You can kind of see it here: http://frockthis.blogspot.com/2011/08/day-2.html Will you still vote for me for president?

    xoxo
    Theresa

    http://frockthis.blogspot.com/

  96. Anonymous says...

    I’m so happy you posted about this! I’m 23 and feeling like I just am completely ready to meet “the one”. I felt like I got so close with my last relationship, which ended because of major differences about religion.
    I’m probably going to take a “dating vacation” even though I haven’t even been dating! Just keeping my mind off of finding someone will probably make someone come into my life?! I hope!

  97. I’m 23 and just got out of a 6 year relationship earlier this year. I had been thinking that I was set and very comfortable with my life. The break up turned everything up side down. I’m enjoying the direction my life is taking, but do feel that dating is ALWAYS on my mind. It bothers me how much my mood is effected by whether or not I have a crush. The ups and downs of being single are both exciting and frustrating. C’est la vie!

  98. 28 and single, broke off an engagement with the “perfect” guy over a year ago because I knew it didn’t feel right, and now I’m just pursuing those things that DO feel right.
    Not in the hopes of stumbling across the “right” guy, but just because it feels good and its fun and I tend to attract the best people for me when I’m all “lit up inside” (as my dad would say).
    I did have the young mom fantasies, but really, I can’t imagine if I had a child already and how that would have changed things. I’m trying to not let worry/other people’s opinions drag me down:)
    I have faith things will work out in their own time, and in the meantime, I’m thriving (starting my own business, getting in great shape, learning, learning, learning….).

    Thanks for this post!
    Emily Jean

    Third Street

  99. Beth says...

    I am 24 and single and all around me my friends are in “he’s the one” relationships, with some recently engaged, and others talking about marriage in the near future. My mum, like yours Joanna has told me not to worry! I asked her the other day “Mum do you think I will ever find someone I am head over heels in love with?” to which she smiled and replied “Of course you will” This world of ours is so full of love that at the end of the day…Why worry?

  100. I’m 22. I think I’ve met my soulmate, but I’m not sure if he knows it yet. It’s kind of aching my heart. But I guess if we really are soulmates, we’ll end up together in the end, right?

  101. When I met my boyfriend (almost 2 years ago) I was 26 and I virtually never had had a relationship. I had had crushes, I had had dates but it seemed the guy never really was interrested. When I was teen I had a realy low self estim and sometimes I felt it was impossible for a guy to like me. Then when I grew up, went to university and after that got a job I felt more and more confident about myself and I begun loving myself. I think this is the most important part of it. Someone cannot love you if you dont’t. I think you find the right person when you’re finally in peace with yourself. So take care of yourself, have fun with your friends and when you’ll have forgotten you were looking for love you’ll meet it.

  102. Anonymous says...

    New to your blog (found it stalking my ex’s best friends blog… Sick I know). I am terrified that I have missed the boat. I’m 28 with 2 kids (same dad) in Utah. I’m basically screwed. I spent my early twenties going back and forth between two guys. I was always the other woman because they (and I let them) had girlfriends. They both met me when we were unattached and I informed them that I wasn’t looking for a boyfriend. They moved on to other girlfriends but still messed around with me. I met my kids father when I was 24 and ready to settle down. After 3 months we were pregnant. I didn’t know he was a drug addict who was abusive. After we split up, my ex who always had a girlfriend killed himself. He was a broken soul but I worry he was my soul mate. The other ex has a girlfriend and he still tries to cheat on her with me. I only work and go home in the thoughts that my kids need a present and good mom before I need a partner. I don’t think anyone will want to jump into this ready made family. I’m cautious too because I’m scared to let anyone near my kids. Basically I’m screwed and it makes me sad. I try to be ok with never getting married but I want more kids. I want an equal partner. I want a soul mate. For now my daughter and son will take up my whole heart until or if there is someone out there worth sharing it with.

  103. Anonymous says...

    I’m 33 and have been single for 3 years. I do enjoy my independence and not having to deal with the drama that a relationship can bring, but I do worry a lot when I’ll ever meet the right man. I worry that my friends and family think I’m weird or that they are talking about me behind my back about why I don’t have a boyfriend. I don’t want to do the dating sites, I hope that I will meet him when I’m out doing what I enjoy, or through a friend…

  104. mo says...

    Thanks so much for this post, and for everyone who left comments. I’m 37 and single. It’s hard and heartbreaking and frustrating. I had a long term relationship that didn’t work out and feel like I lost so much time there, but I try not to dwell in regrets. I try to focus on myself and take breaks from trying to find someone, but it’s always there lurking in my thoughts everyday… wondering if it will ever happen for me. I try to block out that clock that is ticking loudly in my head (oh it’s a real thing) and try to remain hopeful and positive… some days are better than others. :)

    Your post and lots of the comments were great to read tonight, so thanks again!

  105. i recommend the movie Timer for this topic! it’s a really great movie on that concept of if you knew when you were going to meet “the one” here’s the trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bYRYyvjKL7E & it’s streaming on netflix :)

  106. Anonymous says...

    Honestly, yes. I think about this a lot. I think of how unlikely it feels to meet someone who is the perfect complement to me. I live in Chicago, and sometimes I think the kind of guy I’m looking for doesn’t exist in this city. Sometimes I wonder if I’m in the right place to really meet someone. It’s hard to imagine he’s here. I guess I’m only 25 – but so many of my friends are already married. It’s easy to find people to date, but difficult to find someone who is my true soulmate. And that’s what I’ll continue to search for -a best friend, soulmate… otherwise, it’s not worth it.

  107. Melanie from Sydney says...

    From the number of comments, I can see this is very topical and on everyone’s minds. I was lucky to meet my husband when I was 24 (though it took until I was 32 and 11 months for us to marry). Prior I never thought about getting married, wasn’t really into long-term relationships. Then on a working holiday in London, my first week in a city where I knew no-one, I met this 6 foot 2 inch tall Aussie bloke (I too am an aussie and needed to travel OS to find him) lanky with curly hair and light blue eyes, and within 3 weeks we were in absolute adoration with each other, 9 months later (no, not a baby) we were back in Sydney and living with each other, and although we have had our ups and downs, almost 10 years later, I feel so blessed that I met this wonderful man who has become my rock, my bestfriend who inspires me to be the best person I can be. Being 13 months older then him, I believe he was made especially for me. I was not looking, but I took a risk of travelling OS on my own, I took that leap of faith, and found my love.

  108. Hmmm. I’m 34. I don’t know. Is he out there? I hope so. I think I will live like he’ll show up in a year. I like it. And if he doesn’t, then what a great year it will be!

  109. jen says...

    no, because i met him. and we’ve been together for the last 16 years :)

  110. hi joanna! i am 32 and live in austin. my identical twin sister lives in san francisco. we both have yet to marry.

    when i was a kid, i thought i would get married at 26 – the “perfect” age. that obviously didn’t happen and i’m totally okay with that.

    i honestly don’t know if i want to get married. yeah, i get bored or lonesome sometimes, but marriage scares me. i don’t know if i want to be with one person the rest of my life. i love my independence and i fear losing it.

    also, i don’t want to have kids.

    my sister is the opposite and wants to fall in love, get married and have kids.

    we talk about our geographic locations and wonder if it helps or hurts our dating (btw, we are both in relationships right now).

    there are definitely challenges being in texas. i’ve been broken up with many times for not being religious, not wanting kids, and for being a vegetarian!

    xo

  111. Anonymous says...

    I am 28 and a virgin too boot. I’m not ugly by any means—not meaning to sound vain. It is very disheartening to be single and have nearly all my friends married working on their second and third child. I try not to think about it so much, but I always wonder when I’ll get my turn at love.
    Your post was very encouraging, so thank you for that.

  112. Man on man, did I date, endlessly searching for the right one… always feeling a little too quirky, a little too bookish to meet the right man.

    On a whim, after leaving I job I hated, I tried online dating. I met my boyfriend, who’s the love of my life. Maybe not a soul mate because I just can’t believe there’s only one person for you. But he’s as close to a soul mate as I can imagine.

    Ladies, if you think you’ll never find someone, it simply ain’t true. And I’m an English teacher and stand by “ain’t.”

  113. Jessica says...

    Wow Joanna, I needed this post! Thanks so much for sharing your mom’s words of wisdom. It’s all about perspective, I guess. I’m from Vancouver, Canada and I often feel that it is the worst place for single women as there are actually (it’s verified!) more women in the city than men. This is a great reminder to calm down and just live life :)

  114. Oh thank you for this post! I love your blog but I will admit that sometimes I feel like I’m reading about a life that I might not get to live. I’m 27 and this post describes my feelings exactly. I’m meeting plenty of guys but no one that I have any real interest in dating. I like the idea of assuming that you will meet him whether it’s in two weeks or two years and just not worrying about it. Of course, that’s easier said than done!

  115. jo, i love that you ask these questions. and that, really, you could ask ANY woman and she would have a well-worn opinion.
    i’m dating right now, about 7 months in, and honestly, i’m not sure! i don’t know what it takes “to know” and it’s a bit of a journey to get to the bottom of if we’re compatible for the long haul. i love him and i’m in love with him, but marriage? i don’t know. should i know by now?
    xo.

  116. I think this post is so timely in my life. It was great to read. Also its wonderful to know that you already have your happy ending.

  117. You say men who are “a little nuts” like it’s a bad thing :-)

  118. Earlier this year I kind of worried about this since I’m 29 and at the time did not have any prospects. I decided to let it go and just keep being friendly to the guys I met. Then a casual friend decided to ask me out and now we’re engaged. He’s perfect for me.:)

  119. Cat says...

    I just turned 21 few days ago. I never had a relationship my whole life. Sometime I am so jealous of couples on the street. Some of my friends seem to find their partner at one click and I never once. Time to time I would wonder why I don’t. I would worry about few years down the road and I am getting older. What if I still can’t find one. But I had come to reliease life is amazing, he would appear at the most out of no where.

  120. When I was attending the University of Florida, my grandmother kept asking me…when are you going to get a boyfriend. I finally said to her …. grandma, there are more girls at UF than boys, then half the boys at UF are gay, then half of the straight ones are taken, then half of what is left over is a complete jerk…so see what a small group I am dealing with a 1/2 of a 1/2 of a 1/2 of a 1/2….she stopped asking after that. However, like you I was totally convinced that finding someone special was completely impossible but yet it happened and that was 3 years ago and I sometimes often still find myself pausing with amazement that I did the unthinkable…found my soul mate!

  121. This also spoke to me, oddly like a lot of other readers, I am 29. I live in NYC and I think I might have met my soulmate, but he lives in Montreal. We’ve known each other 3 years and kind of dated years ago, but travels took us in other directions. A month ago, we reconnected when I was passing through his town. I just invited him to come stay with me on a vacation I have planned in Nova Scotia, will he take the bait? Laughing, I realize he might have no idea I even like him.

  122. I’m going to turn my 30 this December with no prospects and no dating for a while. Therefore, this blog is really into my mind, not only for the pleasure parts but the quote ones. My parents are very worry which made me a little anxious about my current status. But,your words are really speak into my feeling and thoughts about the soulmate. He will be there, somewhere out there, I dont need to worry too much , but, I, myself who also have to create more chances to capture more opertunities.
    Really love your posts and happy to share with your happiness via this blog :)

  123. I just had to speak up when I saw this post. I felt the exact same way for a few years! I worried constantly that I would never meet someone. I’m 28 and engaged living in Nashville. I always blamed the city because it’s such a family place I thought every guy over 18 was alreayd married! :) Anyway, I felt the same as you after meeting Mike, I just thought, I can’t believe I worried, cried and whined so much.

  124. Oh my gosh… I wish we could have a ‘cup of Jo’ ;) and talk about this for HOURS! I am 30 and SINGLE! I thought I’d have at least one child by now. But I am learning not to worry and to just enjoy life. I realized something about myself. I have a free spirit and I love to explore the world and fill my days with new adventures. Family life might put me on a leash. So while I still yearn to have my own family… I no longer fret about it.

  125. yes, definitely I worry I will never find someone. I am currently planning on leaving this college town in hopes of widening my prospects. I hope location matters or I’m lost.
    ps. thank you so much for your wonderful blog!

  126. I fell in love in fifth grade. We starting “going steady” as high school freshmen. We have been married for 42 years, and happily so. We raised three daughters together, and no one else would ever love them like he does, which makes me love him even more. Marriage is not smooth. We have not been happy with each other every day, or every week, or even every month. But it was so worth sticking out the bad times for the long term. We love and enjoy each other as much as ever, in every way. There really are Happily Ever After stories… Keep your spirits up, Ladies (and Gentlemen!)

  127. I’m 29, living in Boston, and completely exhausted by the dating scene here. If I had a dime for every bad date I’ve been on, I’d have at least $5.

    I don’t want any more funny/horrendous bad date stories, I want to meet a special someone. Alas, alack. Until then, I’m taking a break from bad dates, and just enjoying the everyday joys.

    xo
    dfest

  128. Being tall, skinny, and beautiful in NYC will not get you the man. In fact, nowadays men look for something else. I was in a relationship for 7 years and even though we traveled around the world together once we moved to NYC it only took him a year to leave me for a prostitute that he met on Craigslist. She was not tall or skinny or beautiful. Girls, please, don’t panic and just live your life and enjoy the city. Now I’m 30 and still single and I am totally loving it. I am very excited to know the perfect man is walking somewhere in this planet and one day we will meet. How magical is that?

  129. This isn’t so much me (anymore) but really made me think of a dear friend of mine. She is 30, and single, with no prospects. She has always wanted to be a wife and mother more than anything else. She lives in a small town in GA with very few singles, especially in her age group. She has learned a lot and grown a lot in her life and is going to be quite the catch for whoever finally does catch her; but part of her life experience has lead her to have incredibly high standards – which shouldn’t be sacrificed – and made her very independent and confortable in her self. But she does often wonder if she’ll ever find someone…

  130. 34. still single. bothers me. A LOT!!! yes, it drives me crazy! I hate to think that I’m going to get old and alone. I hate that idea! If you happen to know a nice single man that would like to meet a 34 Argentine teacher, please let me know!!!! hehehe!!!

  131. I always love hearing other people have these worries too! I’m 32 and single. I’ve pretty much always been single but I’m now trying to really put myself out there. I worry about not finding someone but a lot of that comes from family/friends who worry way too much about my dating life. I try to not let it get to me.

    I’ve been talking to a couple guys here in Chicago. But oddly enough, I met a guy during my trip to NYC last week. He’s not an improviser like me, but really funny and cute and just fun to be around. Not sure if anything will come of it but I’m excited to see where it goes!!

    Thanks for your input! :)

  132. Anonymous says...

    I’m 28 and 5 months ago I broke up with my boyfriend of 8 years. That is a lot when you are 28, it feels like my whole life. He could have been the one, but chose not to. Now I worry that I might not find someone who wants to be the one for me, someone who is willing to try. I do worry but most of the time I am okay. I might get scared if I remain single for 2 years (biological clock ticking already). So right now I am going out as much as I can and talking to as many guys as I can. I am not dating, I simply go out and talk to them if they approach me in a bar. I would like to think that someday I will actually like one of those guys and start dating.

    I loved reading your comments, girls, thanks for sharing.