How Are You Doing?

Welcome back! I’d love to catch up and to hear how things are going with you. If you’re up for it, here’s a little pop quiz:

A dessert you’ll never refuse:
A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently:
Something you’re looking forward to:
What’s worrying you:
Your childhood nickname:

Once when I was having a hard time, my friend Lina asked me what was wrong and waved her arms toward herself and said, “Hand me your stress.” It was the kindest gesture, I’ll never forget it how it felt. So, if you have something on your mind, send it my way; I’d be glad to take some of that weight off your shoulders.

People are often bummed about summer ending, but I have to say, fall has always been my favorite season. I love the smell of apple crisp and how people look inexplicably attractive in windbreakers. Plus, the anticipation of Halloweeeeeeen! (Toby wants me to go as Cher from Mamma Mia, haha.) “Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower,” said Albert Camus.

Thank you so much for being here. Sending so much love your way. xoxo

P.S. My twin sister’s home makeover, 14 things to do with friends (other than dinner) and a B.J. Novak interview that still makes me laugh.

(Top photo by J Danielle Wehunt/Stocksy. Bottom photo from Storm King Art Center.)

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Linda

September 25, 2019 4:22pm 4:22 pm

1. Mint chocolate chip ice cream
2. Book – A Place for Us/ TV Show – Mindhunter
3. Seeing a high school friend in a few days – it has been at least 10 years!
4. My husband is slowly dying of a degenerative brain disease
5. Oolie

Kelly P

September 17, 2019 6:28pm 6:28 pm

A dessert you’ll never refuse: Hot Fudge Brownie Sundae
A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently: Making It Up As I Go Along by Marian Keyes
Something you’re looking forward to: My first autumn season and Christmas living in England
What’s worrying you: My dad’s back surgery on Thursday
Your childhood nickname: Kelly Kaboo

This was fun – I love it when you do things like these :-)

Kelly

September 17, 2019 9:42am 9:42 am

1. I’m a sucker for a meringue roulade. My mother-in-law makes a fantastic one, and it’s so light and special, and easier than you think. https://www.christinascucina.com/summer-berry-meringue-roulade/
2. Bottle Shock on Amazon Prime. It’s kind of a slow movie, but the 1-2 punch of Chris Pine and Alan Rickman is a guaranteed mood booster.
3. I filled my freezer with fancy popsicles from GoodPop! Clinging to summer here in Texas.
4. My visa is worrying me. It’s been two months, and it’s such an unexpectedly long process. My husband had to go ahead to France without me, which hurts my heart.
5. My dad calls me Kellybeth, short for Kelly Elizabeth. I called him Daddybeth for many years!

ATD

September 15, 2019 3:42pm 3:42 pm

Hi Cup of Jo team and commenters, would anyone have a recommendation for a marriage therapist in the NYC or Northern NJ area? My husband and I live in Bayonne, NJ, with our 19 month old twins. We’ve been married for three years and we’re having a rough time. I want to try therapy, and would really love a solid recommendation since we are treading in such uncharted territories for us. Thank you so much. I read CoJ everyday and thought about commenting when I first read this post, but really needed to make the request today.

Aleksandra

Reply to ATD

September 17, 2019 6:14am 6:14 am

Hi there, I don’t have any recommendations as I live in NZ but I also have twins (mine are 15 months old) plus a 3 year old and my husband and I have been going through some rough times too…We started therapy and it seems to be helping but there is a long way ahead of us. I am telling you this to let you know that you are not alone in this. I hope you find a good therapist and things will get better for you and your husband. All the best X

ATD

Reply to ATD

September 17, 2019 11:52am 11:52 am

Thank you, Aleksandra. Your kindness does help :). I am hoping the best for you, your husband and your babies as well.

Tricia

September 14, 2019 1:20pm 1:20 pm

A dessert you’ll never refuse: a brownie sundae
A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently: Let’s pretend this never happened, Jenny Lawson, makes me laugh so hard I cry
Something you’re looking forward to: My birthday “season”
What’s worrying you: Relying on pain pills for an unfix-able health issue
Your childhood nicknames: Malnu-Tricia (I was really skinny, so clever brothers) Trasha (I was a slob, brothers too, sigh)

Kimberli Simon

September 13, 2019 8:56pm 8:56 pm

A dessert you’ll never refuse: chocolate cake
A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently: My Life As A Rat by Joyce Carol Oates
Something you’re looking forward to: Seeing my sons who live far away
What’s worrying you: The world
Your childhood nickname: Kimmers

Elizabeth

September 11, 2019 7:03am 7:03 am

A dessert you’ll never refuse: cheesecake from Alien Brew Pub
A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently: Maizie Dobbs
Something you’re looking forward to: cooler weather
What’s worrying you: my daughter’s transfer to accelerated math
Your childhood nickname: Libby

Vanessa

September 10, 2019 9:01pm 9:01 pm

A dessert you’ll never refuse: Mincemeat pie, gluten free crust and real whipped cream along with a cup of tea
A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently: Maybe you should talk to someone, Lori Gottlieb
Something you’re looking forward to: Being done with the divorce or closing on my house – one of those.
What’s worrying you: As always, the people closest to me. The ones I share genetic material with.
Your childhood nickname: Van

katie

September 10, 2019 2:19pm 2:19 pm

A dessert you’ll never refuse: molten lava cake
A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently: Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil
Something you’re looking forward to: the weekend
What’s worrying you: I’ve been trying to be more laid back about things– not get exasperated when someone plays music too loud on the El or if someone rolls their luggage over my feet, small things like that– and I’m worried I’m not going to be able to achieve that level of zen. Here’s to trying!
Your childhood nickname: Katie Bug

Chalen

September 9, 2019 5:29pm 5:29 pm

A dessert you’ll never refuse: Reese’s dark chocolate peanut butter thins! They’re new and SO delicious! Because they’re dark chocolate and ‘thin’ they feel like less of a cheat treat!
A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently: The book The Power by Naomi Alderman- wow wow wow! Just Wow!
Something you’re looking forward to: Ski season! I live in Colorado and decided to buy a different ski pass than the one I usually do this year, so I’m looking forward for a season of new to me mountain terrain!
What’s worrying you: The fact that I’m nearly 32 and *very* single and quite literally all of my friends are engaged, married, or married with 1-2 kids. Not for lack of trying, I date often but nothing seems to stick.. When will I ever get there?
Your childhood nickname: Chooch! I didn’t crawl as a baby, I scooched on my butt so my parents called me Scoochie Choochie. How embarrassing! My mom tried to bring that nickname with me to my college freshman dorms and I shut it down real quick!

Madelaine

September 9, 2019 4:53pm 4:53 pm

1. Warm chocolate chip cookies (no nuts!)
2. Save Me the Plums by Ruth Reichl and Workin’ Moms on Netflix
3. A trip to visit my best friend from college
4. An inexplicable toothache
5. Moodles

Annelise

September 9, 2019 4:47pm 4:47 pm

1. Tiramisu
2. New Grand Designs episodes on Netflix
3. Our first biking trip with the kids, in the south of the Netherlands, starts Friday!
4. the climate crisis
5. Dino

Becca

September 9, 2019 2:48pm 2:48 pm

1. Flan
2. I finally “woman’d up” and saw chapter 1 of the new “IT” remake this past Saturday. Loved it.
3. Using our new tent and bed rolls for some serious (comfy!) fall camping in the Shenandoah Valley/National park area.
4. How to reduce our hours with our nanny. We need less care, but she doesn’t need less money; I want to find a way for all needs to be met.
5. Moonbeam. Apparently my hippie parents told me to “be a willow, Moonbeam” when I got fussy as a baby. Wise words at any age!

Lendy

September 9, 2019 12:50pm 12:50 pm

A dessert you’ll never refuse: berry pie/crumble especially w a scoop of vanilla ice cream!
A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently: Four Weddings & A Funeral (Hulu), Culpable podcast, Home Fire (Joanna rec)
Something you’re looking forward to: Saying bye-bye to summer—I’m just not a summer person.
What’s worrying you: Taxes/Money
Your childhood nickname: LendyLu or LL

Alisha

September 9, 2019 12:24pm 12:24 pm

1. Pumpkin crunch cake or anything with meringue
2. Life in Pieces and Pen15
3. Halloween, so begins the best time of the year
4. I’m worried about my relationship with my son, we seem to be pushing each other buttons lately and he’s only six! How are we gonna survive the teen years.
5. Leelee

Danielle

September 9, 2019 8:12am 8:12 am

1. anything chocolate
2. Good Boys ??????
3. Fall weather and all that comes with it! Sweaters, Halloween, apple picking, the smell of the air…
4. Will I be able to get pregnant again after my miscarriage?
5. Noodle

Frederieke

September 9, 2019 5:19am 5:19 am

1. Anything Chocolate
2. Circe/ Mrs. Maisel / Shazam
3. Strictly come dancing! (I’m a big Anglophile)
4. Not getting pregnant
5. Freddy (Frederieke is just to long)

Jenn

September 8, 2019 11:38pm 11:38 pm

A dessert you’ll never refuse: Baked Baileys Cheesecake

A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently: Orange is the New Black’s final season – gut-wrenching but I’ve enjoyed it. I loved Fleabag and Stranger Things for more escapism though.

Something you’re looking forward to: A holiday to New Zealand to see family. Celebrating Halloween with my kids who are very into the idea of ghosts and spooky things at the moment.

What’s worrying you: Climate change and a seeming loss of empathy as a quality globally. I find it hard to comprehend how people can be so cruel and unfeeling towards other people and towards our planet. On a more personal level I’m worried about our family finances – with two young kids it’s been pretty tight!

Your childhood nickname: Jellybean

Addie

September 8, 2019 11:03pm 11:03 pm

1 muddy buddies!!!
2 on the basis of sex
3 this one made me pause…I think my next run
4 so many worries..money, finding a new job, a kid with anxiety, a kid with a speech delay, an ethics report…life is good but worries are plentiful
5 none!

Christina

September 8, 2019 9:33pm 9:33 pm

1. chocolate cake with vanilla ice cream
2. I finally read The Goldfinch – which is apparently also going to be a movie!
3. Speaking at a work conference in November – in Miami! :)
4. My husband had emergency brain surgery at the end of June… so lots of anxieties right now. (He’s doing relatively well)
5. Beena

Lauren

September 8, 2019 9:32pm 9:32 pm

I started a new (big!) job last week that has my family, husband and two small children, in a different state with none of our familiar support. I know the job will be great and we will be great, but when it’s so new it feels very overwhelming. I hope I can look back at this time 6 months or a year later and think, this was definitely the right decision.

Tanya

September 8, 2019 7:52pm 7:52 pm

A dessert you’ll never refuse: cheesecake!!!
A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently: Movie A Simple Favor
Something you’re looking forward to: My broken leg healing… I injured both legs and the whole family suffered :( for 9 weeks and counting… I’m still not walking properly or driving yet and it’s been the worst. Partly because I’m not good asking for help because inconveniencing others isn’t my jam.
What’s worrying you: how much I’ve needed to ask my Husband and kids to help me even though they say they don’t mind.
Your childhood nickname: Loulabel

Asha

September 8, 2019 5:41pm 5:41 pm

A dessert you’ll never refuse:
Key Lime pie or plain cheesecake, or a really good brownie/cookie (basically I’m a woman with a dessert obsession)
A book, TV show or movie you enjoyed recently: Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine (for the 1st time) & Schitt’s Creek (for the 3rd time)
Something you’re looking forward to: finding a new do-able routine after having my 3rd baby
What’s worrying you: That my older 2 sons aren’t getting enough of their mom the past 7 months (since the baby arrived)
Your childhood nickname: my name is 4 letters. Not sure it gets any shorter ;) but my closest friend called me “ ‘sha”
What a fun pop quiz! It’s brightened up the middle of my day!

Cristina

September 8, 2019 5:37pm 5:37 pm

1. Icecreams
2. Travel man, with Richard Ayoade??
3. Happiness, after a breakup
4. Loneliness, my greatest fear of all times
5. I did not have any

September 8, 2019 5:15pm 5:15 pm

1. Cookie dough
2. the theory of everything
3. Something looking forward to: getting out of the whole I am in right now. Not being afraid about life. Feeling powerful to change things.
4. Depression.
5. Pollo – chicken in Spanish

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