Design

Have a Fun Weekend.

Dad biking with kids

What are you up to this weekend? We have one more day in California before flying home. Just enough time to fit in 100 more tacos! Hope you have a good one, and here are a few fun links from around the web…

How dare you make me into a hero?” (Worth reading.)

17 ways to hold a baby, haha.

Wishlisting these adorable shoes.

What an out gay Olympian could mean to a kid now.

How to build a better vegetarian sandwich.

Edith Zimmerman wrote a comic about how and why she quit drinking.

An ode to talking on the phone. “When a woman is in labor, midwives will often ask to speak to her on the phone; they listen to how the pain changes her voice to help gauge how far along she might be… It’s good to hear joy and anger and sadness, to receive it in your body, and to be heard in all of these states, too. This is what we mean when we say ‘It’s so good to hear your voice.'”

Can you solve this math brain teaser?

These jeans make everyone look taller.

A fun way to entertain.

The 100 best movies on Netflix, if you’re stumped.

What it feels like to slide downhill at 90 miles per hour. (!)

Young people, we’ve been waiting for you.

Plus, a great reader comment:

Says Emily on a pop quiz: “I’m a high school teacher, and every day I do a simple check-in with my students called ‘mood temp.’ Everyone imagines that their mood is a temperature, and we just whip around the room quickly and say numbers. It’s the simplest thing, but a really great way to get a sense of what’s happening for them. Kids have told me it makes them feel valued and seen, without the pressure of having to explain themselves.”

(Biking photo by Rudy Herzog via Miss Moss. Hero link via Erin. Edith comic via Kottke. Brain teaser via Ashley.)

  1. NT says...

    I loved the article from a furious teacher.

  2. Caitlin says...

    Solving that math brain teaser in just a few seconds is probably the greatest achievement of my life, and definitely the greatest achievement as far as math is concerned! (also probably a fluke??) Almost makes me want to sign up for the GREs haha.

    • Lisa says...

      Caitlin- I thought the same thing! The answer was the first thing that popped into my brain once realizing it wasn’t basic addition- took me about 10 seconds and then I immediately felt like I wasted this brilliant brain by not even attempting the LSATs 10 years ago. Then I laughed at myself- time to get back to work.

  3. Sarah Pedersen says...

    I love that photo of the man on the bike pulling the buggy along. Although it was taken several decades before my Danish husband was born, my in-laws say they used to ferry the kids around in a similar fashion – one on a bike seat and the other in the buggy. :)

  4. Eileen says...

    Just a note – the photographer’s name is Rudi Herzog. And he’s German but that’s not part of his name. :)

    • Stella Blackmon says...

      Hahaha, good catch, Eileen. Thank you!

  5. Lisa says...

    I live in Philly and that sandwich looks AMAZING. Why oh why is it not on their menu?! Do you hear me, Middle Child?!?!

  6. Vicki says...

    The video that comes on after “How to Hold your Baby” is “How to Hold your Toddler” and I cried from laughing at it! This could be b/c just today I was nursing my baby while my toddler was sitting on my lap, so, you know, the things I find to be funny these days are a little weird.

  7. Annie says...

    I had to comment because of the teacher’s letter. I couldn’t agree more, and thought it was lovely.

    Then I read the comments on her letter and am back to hating humanity.

    Related: special shout-out to the CoJ comments section that is filled with intelligence and respect. <3

    • Tanith says...

      I couldn’t agree more; Cup of Jo readers are some of the most thoughtful caring people I have encountered on the internet. It always makes me so happy coming here to hear thoughts from this special group of people <3

  8. Courtney says...

    I LOVE LOVE Everlane. In fact, I have the Modern Loafer, High Waisted Skinnies, and Scoop Neck Tee on from them right now. HOWEVER. What on Earth?! The in-seam for these jeans is 26.5 inches. My typical inseam is about 25-26 inches that would hit my ankle/top of my foot. These jeans would look insane on me! They would be weird mini flares. that would skim the tops of my shoes!!! Tsk, tsk, Everlane. They are missing the mark.

    • Kate says...

      This made me laugh out loud. I love Everlane, but between these and the wide legs, what sensibility am I missing (or are they)? You must hand it to them for their distinctive aesthetic… :) Perhaps the the cropped flare will be ubiquitous come spring and we will be missing the fun with our modest ankles.

    • Court says...

      Kate! I agree. I’m actually for the cropped trend however 26.5 inches would not be cropped on me. They would be cropped on someone that is say…perhaps….5’9″. But then I ask the obvious question of why someone that is already super tall want to look taller?! The whole thing baffles me. But in the world of today, I am totally fine being puzzled by this and laughing it off rather than the serious tone of the other links. Maybe it’s even healthy for my energy to go to towards being upset about the cropped-flares-that-aren’t-cropped-on-me-conundrum because I can’t even handle the emotion I have when I read the teacher’s letter. Giant sigh.

  9. Karen says...

    The teacher’s letter got my crying so hard. I remember turning up the volume of the radio last week when I heard of Trump’s inhumane idea of giving guns to teachers. To teachers?! I was completely shocked. Living and being a teacher in Belgium my heart goes out to all pupils, students, teachers, parents, grandparents, …who have to live with this kind of reality. It’s such an insult that Trump’s ‘idea’ was all he and his gang could come up with. Really unbelievable.

    Funny note: when I saw the biking photo, I thought, that just can’t be anywhere else but in the Netherlands.

  10. Caitlin Lee says...

    In regards to the “young people, we’ve been waiting for you” link, I just wanted to post this counter argument. It’s not really a counter argument, but young people have always been active. I think it’s just how people are finally being receptive to the message. And of course, race always factors in. Always. Anyway, it’s a good read: https://www.theroot.com/why-it-hurts-when-the-world-loves-everyone-but-us-1823253675?utm_medium=sharefromsite&utm_source=The_Root_twitter

    • sasha says...

      Also, I was just thinking, these are the kids who grew up with Barak Obama as president. These are kids who had a real role model for making a difference in the world. Speaking for my own kids, 21 & 19, they are woke af, never shut up about injustice (in a good way!), and are activists in whatever way they can find. My oldest is graduating college early, heading to law school so she will be armed and dangerous and ready to take on the establishment. My youngest wants to teach… Still… Even now. I am so proud of them. I’m so grateful they met Mr Obama on the campaign trail and went door to door with me, and saw they could make a difference. It may be a dark time, but we have a lot of lights ready to shine.

  11. M says...

    Thank you for posting the link to Rebecca Berlin Field’s brilliant and eloquent essay. Importantly, in doing so you permit it to be “heard in EVERY corner of the land” .

    An excellent comment to the essay by Rosellen from Staten Island ends: “How can we get Ms. Field’s eloquent and infuriating letter reproduced and heard in every corner of the land? But will it matter? Certainly it won’t matter to Trump and his minions. What will matter is when election time rolls around and we vote out the venal robots currently in charge.”

    Yes. VOTE them out. End this now.

    • M says...

      Sorry – I should point out my comment refers to “How dare you make me into a hero”. Thank you Joanna.

  12. Speaking from a deep belly laugh: 5’9″ and a size 2? That model would look tall in anything! And why do we need to appear taller than we are?

    • Heidi says...

      I was going to say the same thing… why is a height a goal? Seems so arbitrary. It would be like saying, “this hat makes everyone’s hair more brown.” It imposes an unnecessary standard.

  13. Ashley C. says...

    I love Emily’s idea! Tell me more- do you have a scale?

    I, too, teach high school students. I actually teach in a synchronous cyber school, so that would be an easy way to check in with kids that I cannot see face-to-face.

  14. Candace says...

    The Edith Zimmerman comic is so incredibly wonderful & relatable. I really appreciate the levity she brings to a topic that feels so daunting at times.

  15. KylieO says...

    Oh, that teacher’s letter broke my heart. I’m a teacher in Australia and I’m FURIOUS on behalf of my counterparts in the US. I can’t even imagine feeling this way going to work. Her letter is such a powerful and important response.

  16. Bec says...

    I am 5″11. When I tried on cropped jeans (the Levis ‘wedgie’ jeans) I looked like a little teapot. Short and stout! baaaad.

  17. Linda says...

    Cropped jeans actually make you look shorter. They cut off the leg line rather than elongating it.

  18. Kara says...

    If only there was a way to get paid solving math brain teasers! I sometimes feel like that’s the only type of thing school taught me to be good at, yet there’s no real life application:)

  19. Anna says...

    Midwife here- we LOVE the phone talking trick. When I worked and took call in NYC, my favorite thing would be when I would talk to a mom on the phone all day and hear her labor progress until she sounded “ready” to come into the hospital. Meeting her at the hospital for the rest of labor was always such a nice “reunion” of sorts.

  20. I only got through the first paragraph of the teacher’s letter before crying. Too much.
    Loved the quote about talking on the phone in labor….I had three homebirths and every time when I called to ask my midwives to come, they would ask to hear me go through a contraction. Gets trickier after the first though, since you know (in my case) it was going to go much quicker and that can make it seem like you’re still doing ok!

    • sasha says...

      Yes!
      As a doula, I always knew it was a sign when I’d been chatting all day with laboring Mom, then I get a call from Dad. “Yeah, she’s done talking.” Cue very loud mama elk moaning soundtrack in background and Dad dropping phone. See you soon baby!

  21. Sonia says...

    Just had to say that that picture by Rudy Herzog German is amazing.

  22. Laura C. says...

    That teacher’s letter is so incredible. Does she have to choose between defending her students or her children? That’s nuts. America please, gun control NOW!

  23. Caitlyn says...

    Thank you for sharing that essay, I hadn’t seen it and it really spoke to me. I’m currently a PhD student at a large midwestern university where I teach undergrads. I’ve been a college teacher for the last four years. I immediately posted on Facebook a link to the essay with my own thoughts. I hope it humanizes the issue for people. I thought I’d share my thoughts here as well.

    On the first day of class the semester, when I went through the typical security drills with my students (fire alarms, natural disasters, et al.) I paused knowing I should address school shootings. However, I also knew that if there was a school shooting I wouldn’t be able to defend or protect my students (I’m 4’9′ and weigh 100 pounds, in case you forgot what I looked like) who are all taller than me. I made this joke to them because I’m small but also because, and I’m being honest, I’m not willing to die for my students. Luckily my students are adults so they are ideally more rationale, than say, high school students or, even worse, elementary children. But then again, whose rationale during an outbreak of gunfire when your life is being threatened in a place you thought was safe. I also know that over the course of the last 4 years I have had students who have been aggressive and rude (and at one point harassing) and the thought flickered through my anxiety prone mind that what if this student owned a gun and what if I fail this student and he feels its unjust (I say he, because hello, 94% of mass shootings have been done by men).

  24. Jesse says...

    Yes to talking to midwives on the phone while in labor. And also to moms! My husband and I took a walk around the block and I called my mom who was on the other side of the country. With each contraction I abruptly stopped talking (and walking, and also I full on peed in my maternity pants every time) and had to hand the phone to my husband. My mom booked her plane ticket after that call.

  25. C.C. says...

    Loved Edith Zimmerman’s comic about how and why she quit drinking.

  26. Nora says...

    Yes, yes, yes. I’m 5’1″ so I clicked right on that link – and didn’t know if I should be disappointed or laugh at the joke. Because really, I’d kill for pants that made me look tall without 2-3″ heels.

    You look tall when you’re proportioned like a tall person with long limbs – so ideally you look like 2/3 of your length is from the waist down – not when your clothes look like they’ve shrunk.

    Everlane, you’re drunk, go home.

    • Anneka says...

      RIGHT?!?!! Speaking as a short person, I don’t get it….

    • Dianne says...

      YES!!!! Thank you for saying this. There is absolutely NO WAY that those pants will make a short person look taller, especially if they’re not a size 0. I have loved Everlane from the very beginning and have several pieces from the brand, but lately they seem to be venturing into “Emperor has no clothes” territory with some of their latest offerings (similar story with the wide leg crops with utility pockets they debuted recently).

    • sasha says...

      ?
      This comment made my day!!!

      I wear my jeans or overalls cuffed, mostly, for practical reasons. I’m tallish, 5’6″, and athletically built, and long torso in proportion to my legs, so I’m under zero illusions that my 501s are more flattering cuffed on me. But I live in Montana, and it’s dirty, wet, muddy, snowy, slushy etc here for nine months of the year (the other season is fire), and I have back yard chickens (poo), and I don’t like my jeans getting dirty.
      Could practical ever get a shout out for also being cute? Wouldn’t that be fun.

  27. Ro says...

    I hope the short pants trend sticks around! I’ve been rolling my normal jeans up on the bottom to achieve the look, but have also found a few pairs in thrift stores. Since I don’t have long legs, I think that bit of skin peeking out about my shoe helps lengthen me — and it just looks so cool. Kind of reminds me of the grunge look from 80s London, but also works for more classic folks, as that Everlane link shows. AND it shows off your shoes. Thanks for sharing :)

  28. Mary W says...

    Great list of movies. Lots of surprises and new-to-me stuff.

  29. Jojo says...

    I wish Everlane would make jeans for tall women. I love their clothes but we all aren’t 5’5′.

    • Neens says...

      Seconded! this trend looks terrible on my 5’9″ frame. Looks like im wearing shrunken hand me downs…>.<

    • Joyce says...

      I’m with you!! As a 6′ 2″ girl, I feel a bit cringe-y when things claim to “make you look taller” — I feel that it’s, sadly, implied no one really wants to look *quite* as tall as I am. I like my height, but I’ve never wanted to look taller in my life! So it’s weird to suggest that’s a universal desire.

  30. maia says...

    For me, the adorable shoes you linked look like vulvas!
    And now, I can’t remove that image of my head.

    • Ashley says...

      I thought the same thing! Either that or entrails, some sort of organ!

  31. Nina says...

    That ’emotional temperature’ idea is very sweet, but I wonder if it might work better if the kids could answer privately, instead of in front of the whole class. As a shy, awkward introvert I don’t think I could have answered honestly with all my classmates listening – I would always just have made out that I was fine. The beautiful idea in the currently-everywhere Reader’s Digest article has another brilliant element to it, in that it doesn’t ask about emotions straight out: https://www.rd.com/advice/parenting/stop-bullying-strategy/ – by the way, even in places like the UK where we thankfully don’t have frequent school shootings (we DO have very strict gun control!), I think teachers should be doing this. It would prevent so much sadness and harm of the less headline-making kind as well.

  32. Amy says...

    YES to the art teacher’s letter; I can relate so much. I’m a teacher, plus a mother to a 3.5 yo and expecting. Every damn day I fear the worst. Every day, I linger at day care drop off and stretch my goodbye to my daughter. I stand in front of my classes, feeling my baby kick, and look into the eyes of a few highly unstable, scary kids. Every day I problem solve and plan escape routes. I’m supposed to teach English, to mentor, to care, laugh, support – and I do. The rest of it? It breaks my heart. I’m terrified. But how do I walk away from my students when they need me the most? Am I supposed to abandon them? Turn my back on a career I love and have invested everything in? Yes, teachers are undervalued in our society; I can deal with that. But this disregard for our lives is completely insulting, appalling, and infuriating. Not to mention THE KIDS.

    How is this our reality? I just can’t accept it. We MUST do better.

    • Kate says...

      As a fellow teacher, my heart is breaking for you.

      I’m sending you strength from Australia.

      I hope there is change on the way for you so soon.

    • Ramona says...

      Do not accept this reality, ever. Fight with all your might by voting in those leaders who will take our safety seriously and voting out those who think teachers should be armed is an answer. We need to become activists, and that can be as simple as voting, every single time we can.

  33. Abesha1 says...

    Apropos of the midwives on the phone:

    From NPR News
    Does A Larger Role For Midwives Mean Better Care? http://n.pr/2GDJH5x

  34. Love Emily’s pop quiz! I’m going to start using it with my Chinese Medicine college students! Thank you!

  35. Liz says...

    I know this cut of jeans is on trend right now, but no one is going to talk me into these suckers. I have never witnessed them appear flattering or stylish on anyone. If they make you look taller, it’s only because they look like they don’t fit!! I don’t quite know why I feel so strongly about jeans, and I feel like I sound old and stuffy fussing about clothes like this, and yet….haha

    • Meagan says...

      I feel the same way! I can’t figure out why this style is trending right now.

    • Sarah says...

      Same!

    • Kara says...

      Haha I agree! I don’t think they look good even on women who look good in every crazy trend.

  36. E says...

    YES to the midwife quote. My midwives overheard me when my husband called in and said “yes, she’s in active labor, go to the hospital.” 5 hours later, my baby was born

  37. Erin says...

    I am currently a 4th grade teacher, and I have spent countless nights either awake running through active shooter scenarios and thinking of ways to best protect my kids, or asleep having nightmares that I’m actually experiencing one. Teachers discuss this fear on a daily basis, and we have often found ourselves during bus duty or recess identifying all of the potential “weak points” that could leave our students vulnerable. It’s disturbing, but it is our gross reality. The teacher retention rate is sickeningly low due to the extreme stress and low pay that the job offers, and our government’s lackadaisical response to children being murdered will just push out what teachers we have left. Dedicated teachers already sacrifice so much of their lives to their careers, how dare they expect us to now literally give up our lives? Are we that disposable? Replaceable? I don’t want their guns. I don’t want to expose myself or my students to the exact source of the horror that keeps us awake every night, that leaves me speechless and in tears after I read an email from a parent that their child is scared to come to school after seeing the news. Surely we can do better. If not for the kids, what’s left?

  38. molly says...

    I love the “mood temp” idea!! I think I’m gonna try it with my munchkins:) xo

    • Eliza says...

      Me too!!

  39. Steph says...

    Does NYC lack good Mexican food? Wondering ….because of the tacos!

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      haha it’s just not the same!

  40. Jenna says...

    Could not agree more re: talking on the phone! I’m a labour and delivery nurse and often times husbands will call in to the unit asking whether they should come in. One of the best things I was taught when I was training was to always, always ask to speak to the woman herself. Giving labouring women advice over the phone is tough, but it’s amazing how much more sure I am if I can hear from the woman herself. Can she talk through her contractions? Does she have to stop and breathe? Is she absolutely losing it? (haha) Also, if I’m on the phone with her for 10 minutes and she hasn’t had a contraction, probably safe to stay home for the time being :)

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      that’s fascinating, jenna!

  41. jac says...

    I have a request- can you please post something about looking like a friggin’ adult at work? I have no clue what I am doing. I am 34. Everyone always assumes I am in my early 20’s. This sounds great, but I am transitioning careers and need some advice!

  42. Tanith says...

    Thank you for posting the link to the essay by the “furious” teacher. The reckless comments about arming teachers made by Trump were ignorant at best and dangerous at worst. Teachers are there to educate, not to be prison wardens or bodyguards. My 67 yr old mom works at a school with special education students, does anyone think she would even want to touch a gun, let alone be forced into the position of law enforcement? And what about statistics that prove the mere presence of guns, the higher the likelihood of someone getting shot!

    These suggestions are ludicrous and infuriating. They side-step the problem and pretend to be a solution; like taking cocaine to cure cancer instead of treating the cancer with professional doctors.

  43. patricia blaettler says...

    That picture is hysterical!

  44. t says...

    the fact that you think those jeans make people look taller is more of a brain teaser than the math question. She looks 5’2″ in those jeans rather than 5’9″! I am definitely not seeing what you are seeing. hahaha

    • Jenny says...

      I’m with you on this! I think the cropped style, especially with the kick out at the bottom, cuts off the leg visually. I’m ready for the full-length-pant-revolution. Goodbye, cold ankles!

    • Heidi says...

      Yes! My thoughts exactly!

    • Michelle says...

      I think flood when I see them. A nice fit around the butt, however the length just seems wrong.

    • I have short legs and am furious that almost all jeans are cropped right now, because I think they only look good on those with long legs. I would never agree cropped jeans make you look taller! :)

    • Casey says...

      It’s Everlane’s marketing copy for those terrible pants. Just got an email with the exact same subject line. It’s just like how they claimed their wide-leg crops were incredibly flattering on every body type (they weren’t even flattering on the skinny models). Some kind of gaslighting marketing nonsense.

  45. Laura says...

    Maybe this is just funny to me, but I consider myself a fashionable, woman who enjoys trends and what-not. However, EVERY TIME I click on a link related to clothing or shoes that you post, I really dislike it! :)

    We have different body-types, so that’s probably a factor, but sometimes I think “Nah, I’m not going to click on her clothing links because I won’t like it.” Other times I’m like, “Hey, why not click on it, maybe I’ll like it.” Big ol’ nope every. damn. time.

    It’s just silly. I love everything else, we just have different styles. <3

    • Molly says...

      I feel the same way! I often wonder if it’s just that I don’t live in NYC and am not in the fashion loop.

    • Lily says...

      Haha I’m the reverse, I love EVERYTHING. Those jeans have such cute proportions.

    • Sandra says...

      LOL…I am mostly the same. We just have very different body types, and 95% of what looks amazing on Joanna just wouldn’t work for me. But there are a few things here and there that I like. I’m long-waisted with more of a pear shape, so the cute, boyish cut stuff is terrible on me.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      so great to hear this feedback! what styles are you guys loving right now? any links to things you really love? would love to hear and feature more of those types of pieces in our fashion round-ups! :)

    • Sarah says...

      I feel exactly the same! Jo looks great in everything, but whenever there’s a link for clothes she’s into, I know it’s just not going to appeal to me at all.

    • Heidi says...

      I tend to agree. Everlane is just not someplace I’d like to shop but I feel like I see it everywhere because I’m in their age demographic. It’s not that I don’t like jeans and tee shirts, I just don’t care to pay that much for them. (Even if I did make a salary that would allow me to afford higher priced clothing.) I love my V-neck tees from Target and I shop clearance racks. I did buy a pair of Hobes shoes though, and I wear them almost every day because they go with everything and are so comfortable.

    • Molly says...

      I love your fashion trend roundups in the spring and summer, even though the clothes may not be something I’d wear. I tend to like pieces that would last beyond one season, so classics. Also would love to see ideas for clothes to wear on hikes, vacations, biking-round-town dates! And love ideas for easy, versatile clothes to wear to work.

  46. Lavanya says...

    Answer to puzzle is 96, formula is a+b*a
    1+4 =5
    2+5=12
    3+6=21
    4+7=32
    5+8=45
    6+9=60
    7+10=77
    8+11=96

    • Anna Allen says...

      I did it differently!
      2+5=12
      I multiplied them & added 2
      3+6=21
      I multiplied & added 3
      8+11=
      I multiplied & added 8

      I don’t know why my brain immediately used this pattern but it worked! ??‍♀️

  47. I love the last comment! My mom is also a teacher and now teaches elementary school kids in New York City. She plays them calming music before their nap time. She taught me some of the best lessons in life including money lessons which I talked about here after my husband died:

    https://www.google.co.in/amp/s/journal.thriveglobal.com/amp/p/beddbe6ab3b9

    Life is an amazing adventure. This weekend I’m returning home from India. I’ve learned so many life lessons there too and passing by the Ghandi Ashram, Ghandi’s former home was an out of body experience.

  48. Kari says...

    That Obama quote made me cry.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      me too, miss him so much.

  49. Abby says...

    I got the brain teaser! I’m gonna live off of the internal pride in being a one-in-a-thousand math nerd for the next month or so.

    • Em says...

      I got it right, too! And I’m “bad at math.” Yay us!

    • Twyla says...

      I’m seriously contemplating my genius right now. I got it fairly quickly.

  50. Erin says...

    I saw another pattern
    1+4=5
    5+2+previous answer = 12
    3+6+Previous answer =21
    8+11+previous answer=40

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      yes! that was an alternate answer.

    • Mia says...

      That’s what I saw too!

    • Marcy D says...

      I saw this too! But I skimmed the article too quickly to see that as an alternate solution.

  51. Ammie says...

    If you’re back in Venice area – Tocaya has fab tacos!!