Design

Have a Delicious Weekend.

Prairie Pie

What are you up to this weekend? I’m heading upstate tonight with a few other ladies for a quick no-husbands-no-children getaway. I’m so excited to straight chill without anyone asking me for a glass of water. :) Hope you have a good one, and here are are a few fun links from around the web…

A woman’s place is at the South Pole. (LOVED this.)

Holy smokes, would you would be brave enough to stay in this rental house?

Obama and I had the same favorite book last year, NBD.

The gift of the good enough mother. “Even if it were somehow possible to be the perfect mother, the end result would be a delicate, fragile child who couldn’t tolerate even the slightest disappointment. No mother wants that for her child.”

Already daydreaming about summer!

Oh my gosh, these commuter photos from Tokyo make my heart race.

Chocolate peanut butter cup cookies.

What to say when someone has cancer. “I am a professor, but will I ever teach again? I’m a mom, but for how long? A friend knits me socks and another drops off cookies, and still another writes a funny email or takes me to a concert. These seemingly small efforts are anchors that hold me to the present, that keep me from floating away on thoughts of an unknown future. They say to me, like my sister Maria did on one very bad day: ‘Yes, the world is changed, dear heart, but do not be afraid. You are loved, you are loved. You will not disappear. I am here.'”

Madewell’s new arrivals are great (this sweater) and thumbs up for more size diversity.

Before-and-after of a night out.

Confession: I’ve been going down an Armie Hammer/Timothée Chalamet rabbit hole, and I stumbled upon this gem.

Plus, two great reader comments:

Says Meghan on introducing a new baby to an older child: “My oldest son was three when his brother was born. We bought two monster truck toys as a present from the baby, and my son was so in awe that his brother got him a gift that it was immediate affection. Six years later, he still talks about it. ‘Remember that time when you gave me those monster trucks?! How did you know I liked monster trucks??!'”

Says J. Marie on romance novels: “My husband and I were buying books for our upcoming vacation, and his selections included A Passage to India and Heart of Darkness, while mine were all romance novels fully adorned in magenta pink covers. The sales associate looked at our books and asked me if I didn’t want some higher quality literature. My response: ‘As an avid reader who was also an English major, I’ve already read both of my husband’s book selections and I can assure you that I am going to enjoy my vacation reading time much more than he will.'”

Boom! Have a great weekend. xoxo

(Photo by Prairie Pie/Instagram.)

  1. Excited to see Madewell is now making shorter jeans for us shorter folks. Now if they could just start making dresses, skirts, and shirts in petite sizes…

  2. Madeline says...

    I love Armie and Timmy! I can’t get Call Me By Your Name out of my head!

  3. Jennifer says...

    I currently live in Tokyo and the first time I took the train during rush hour I had to get off at the next stop and take a couple deep breaths. you get used to it (unfortunately), but every so often if I’m not in the right headspace the overcrowding can be completely overwhelming!

  4. Vero says...

    I honestly can’t stop watching those “karma’s a b*tch” videos on instagram now that I’ve seen Busy’s. I’m in a wormhole, help!

  5. M says...

    J. Maries comment on romance novels makes me so happy. I have a master in german literature and when people look at me funny for my reading choices I always tell them I have done all the non fun reading to last three lifetimes :-)

    • Ada says...

      Yes to this?

  6. Katie says...

    I am right there with you on that journey down the rabbit hole! I am in love with Call Me By Your Name and both of those actors. Thanks for the link, so good!

  7. jen says...

    Funny, I was an English major too and used to be very snobbish about people reading trash. My taste in literature has now degenerated and I now read books I never thought I would have. I loved ‘Twilight!’ Chick Lit! Low down mysteries! Apparently there is only so much Chaucer and Milton that will fit in your brain.

  8. Dianna says...

    The “before and after night out” thing… they’re actually recreating a crazy meme that’s sweeping the Internet right now. Google “karma’s a bitch” on YouTube. Seriously, you’ll be entertained for hours!

  9. Alice says...

    It’s so funny to see that house on here- growing up we used to go to the beach in Newquay all the time and used to make up stories about that house!! And last summer my friends got married at the beach just along from there- at the FANTASTICALLY named Lusty Glaze beach- and the day after (with an adult headache) I took a walk along that beach in Newquay and remembered all of those stories again when I looked up at that house. It’s wonderful.

  10. Maria says...

    The gift of the good enough mother…..SO MUCH YES!!!! I’m a teacher in an area that is riddled with anxious kids who are hyper focused on perfectionism. Each year at Back to School Night I show Jim Harshaw’s TED Talk “Why I teach my children to fail”. As the talk is playing you can see parents nervously looking around the room….and then over the next week I always receive several emails saying thank you so much for reminding us that failure is important. I totally understand the pressure as a parent myself now, but let them fail now as littles so they learn the proper coping skills for when they face inevitable failure throughout their adult lives.

    • sasha says...

      That’s awesome Maria what a difference you are making.

  11. cheri says...

    While it’s truly great to see more size-diverse models at Madewell, the jean sizes are not themselves diverse — they stop at 32. I’m 5’9, 170 pounds, & almost 50. (Hello from GenX; menopause is no joke, ladies.) It’s completely batsh*t crazy & frankly infuriating that in 2018 the max pant/jean size for most decent U.S. brands in 32. Hit up Universal Standard & support a company that really supports size diversity. Their MEUSE RESIN JEANS are serious quality —
    and gorgeous on.

    • Chand says...

      Amen

    • jen says...

      Wow, thanks for the tip. Hate that limited size range.

    • I hear you on the size-diversity frustration, Cheri, but in Madewell’s defense – I was shocked when you said they stopped at 32, and followed Joanna’s link immediately – their curvy line goes up to 35. It’s a start.

    • cheri says...

      Lauren, hey — I didn’t know about & didn’t see a “curvy” line at Madewell. When I followed the link & clicked on the jeans *there*, 32 was the largest size. Thanks for the tip. I’ll head back over there. That said, I remain unconvinced any brand needs to create a special category at their label for women who don’t wear a 32 or smaller.

  12. Maiz says...

    I realized at the end of those Tokyo photos that I had been holding my breath through the whole article. Those photos made me want to go straight to that “holy smokes” rental house!

  13. Hana says...

    OMG!! I have also been obsessed with Timmy and Armie for the past few weeks. There are so many great youtube videos with the two of them. Love their chemistry. I am also ashamed to say I’ve been reading fanfic about them…ha! Going to finally see Call Me By Your Name tomorrow :)

  14. Alex says...

    The ham and cheese sandwich picture and her message to those men is fantastic!

  15. Jo says...

    Have a fun girls weekend! The last time my girlfriends and I went away, one said, “I’m just so happy to not have to wipe anyone’s a** for 48 hours!” It made me bust out laughing! Parenthood is so weird.

  16. Catie says...

    I’m glad I’m not the only one who went down the Armie/Timmy (Hammer/Chalamet…Chalammer?) rabbit hole! They’re just so sweet and charming…that video, though–amazing. Hope you have a wonderful getaway this weekend!

    • Lucy says...

      I can’t stop with them either! Videos of them is nearly all my YouTube account is reccomending now…not complaining

  17. Ali says...

    A ham and cheese sandwich!! Pure gold! Love her.

  18. Stephanie says...

    YES to the Timmy/Armie rabbit hole! I am going to be so very, very sad when awards season is over and they stop doing their wonderful promotional tours.

  19. Such a lovely post. Thanks for sharing it, have a nice day.

  20. OMG that Chalamet dance clip

  21. Emily says...

    Omg. J. Marie. My GIRL! way to read that bookstore clerk!

    • Erin LaDue says...

      yes!

  22. I, too, have been down the Timothee Chalamet rabbit hole and learned that he dated Madonna’s daughter! This kid is full of surprises. Totally crushing…

  23. China says...

    My very petite almost five year old only recently got tall enough (and coordinated enough) to get her own water from the automatic dispenser on our fridge. She has refilled her own water pretty frequently, but the other day I asked her to get me more water (the whole time thinking please don’t drop the glass cup! and she was so proud of herself! It was the cutest.

    I can’t yet arrange things so that she can help herself most of the time, because we also have a totally insane 2-year-old, but it’s always good to be reminded how much kids love real jobs where they are actually helping you. Personally, I think it’s fine to still get them water some of the time and do other things for them (being a kid can be really exhausting!) as long as it is balanced out with giving them opportunities to help their parents and others in real, meaningful ways.

    By the way, Joanna, I have recently borrowed your trick of setting up a toy scenario for my 2-year-old when he gets home from daycare and it is so incredible how quickly he gets engrossed in playing by himself when I take two seconds to set the scene. Thanks for all the great parenting tips over the years!

    • Heather says...

      Setting up toy scenarios…? Tell me more, please! I have a somewhat clingy 2yo and his older brother always played more independently so it was never an issue. Thinking this might be something to try…how much do you actually set up? Thanks for sharing!

  24. M says...

    Just a comment on the coincidence that you will be spending the weekend with other women who are leaving husbands behind… That definitely sounds like *straight* chilling. Amazing the impact one word choice makes on the meaning of another! Now, if you were leaving your partners behind–sounds like you’ll be straight *chilling.*

  25. Lily says...

    That photo reminds me of my favorite painting, Pies, Pies, Pies. I love it!

  26. Amy says...

    Huh…I figured I was the only one who had fallen down the Armie Hammer/Timothée Chalamet rabbit hole. I was curious why the movie’s location was moved from by the sea to by a lake and started watching interviews with these 2 + the director….and have been entranced for the last week! Youtube has some great interviews with the 3 of them. LOVE watching the interactions between the 2 actors. I’m really hoping for a sequel.

  27. Vicki says...

    That photo reminds me of Harold and the Purple Crayon: “there was nothing but pie, but there were all nine kinds of pie Harold liked best.”

  28. Patricia says...

    Have a great girls weekend! If you are in the Saugerties area, there is a new barbecue place called Legal Swine. It’s right next to a gas station and looks like nothing, but it is SO GOOD! I had the pulled pork and then went back for the burnt beef ends and it was the best meat I’ve ever eaten in my life…like buttah baby!!

  29. Justine says...

    Haha, nice closing comment. I love great literature but some books are just not holiday reads. I too am obsessed with Call Me By Your Name and I remember thinking in the theatre when Elio was reading Heart of Darkness “Nooooooo Elio, you’re on vacation……”

  30. Bill says...

    I suddenly lost my husband/partner/love of my life of 20 years 2 weeks ago. I am beyond heartbroken and lost without him. He was obsessed with Call Me By Your Name and Timmy! I wanted to send that video to him as soon as I watched it. Luckily we were able to see the movie in Boston on his birthday in December. When he died in the ICU I played Mystery of Love to him.

    • Blandine says...

      I am so sorry! It’s beautiful to hear about your love for each other. Sending you lots of hope and light

    • sasha says...

      I’m so sorry Bill. What is your love’s name?
      It sounds like you two had a wonderful life together. Thank you for sharing about it. Hope you are doing ok today.

    • Bill says...

      What sweet messages. I love this little community. His name is Joe. He tucked me into bed every night for 20 years (well unless I was away) and would give me a kiss goodnight and then either tickled me or said something to make me laugh hysterically. That’s how I ended every day for 20 years! I miss him terribly, he was my everything.

  31. Valeria says...

    Love love love Jade Hameister’s message and J. Marie’s comment about romance books!

  32. sasha says...

    Re: the good enough mom
    As a mom of grown kids, and a child care professional, I beg parents, please stop trying to protect your children from life, please find a way to cope with your fears about their unhappiness, please come to some kind of acceptance that you can’t make their lives perfect.
    Instead of micromanaging their happiness, encourage their resilience, look for opportunities to help them get back up again when they’ve been crushed by life, rather than try and better protect them. Model courage.
    Worry less about happiness and more about goodness, character and compassion. Worry about pointing them toward a meaningful life, that they can feel proud of. It won’t necessarily involve happiness along the way.

  33. Allison says...

    “you will not disappear.” My heart just burst. Gorgeous sentiment and so so true.

  34. Jess says...

    Timmy and Armie, YES! Thanks, hadn’t see that clip. Hilarious.

  35. Sarah says...

    On the topic of “good enough” motherhood. My mom told me once that my job is to “be a rock that your children can swim away from”. This is my motto! I will sit (reading) while my kids play, I let them fail, I let them get frustrated, I let them pour (and spill) their milk. I let them get into disagreements at the playground and figure it out on their own. I’m there, but they are learning to “swim” without me. That’s the whole point isn’t it?

  36. Julie says...

    Dying laughing over J. Marie’s comment! I love Heart of Darkness, but who would read that on a vacation? Woof. Romance novels (and teen novels!) all the way.

  37. Love the mix here, as always—South Pole to that pom pom sweater!!

  38. That Timmy Tim video has been giving me life this week. Could he get any better? LOL

    briana

  39. Emily says...

    I want to hug J. Marie.

  40. Lis says...

    YESSSS J. Marie!

  41. jac says...

    My brother is dying of cancer. Thank you for this post.

    • Alice says...

      Jac I am so sorry to read that. Holding you and your brother in my thoughts, and sending lots of love to you all.

  42. Lisa says...

    Got excited Madewell might actually make clothes for me, but turns out no. Fake news :(

    • Anne says...

      I would try some on. The responses to that article made it pretty clear the woman who wrote it didn’t understand the fashion industry or Madewell

  43. Sarah P. says...

    The Gift of the Good Enough Mother is exactly what I needed to read today. My 3 yr old is going through a rough patch of big emotions and little capability of healthy channeling. We are all working through a lot and this perfectionist mom is feeling failure-ridden. I suppose that means my son is just learning the good, hard lessons of life. THANK YOU.

  44. Have a great weekend, Joanna.
    I notice when you link books you always link to Amazon. I get it, it is so easy, but it would be nice if you could sometimes link to an indie bookstore like Powell’s or some of the great New York City indies.

    • Jane says...

      I second this idea! What a great way to feature different indie bookstores (shout out for Left Bank Books in St. Louis)

    • Small Town Gal says...

      Not all of her readers live in New York. Having the Amazon link is nice, to me at least, so that I can read some reviews, read a bit of a plot synopsis, and then I just have my local library order it. If you have access to a “great indie bookstore” (and the $$$ to buy a book new) great for you.

    • Karen Kirsheman says...

      Great idea. I love Powell’s books! And there is always your local library…..just remember to renew your books on time.

    • Madi says...

      Or to Goodreads!

    • Sally says...

      I totally get this but Amazon is perfect for me as live abroad. It doesn’t meant I will definitely buy the books from Amazon but some of the books linked to are not in print in my country and it’s an excellent way to buy them second hand here or have them shipped.

    • K says...

      Maybe a compromise would be to link both? I’ve seen other blogs link to indie book sites and Amazon for the same recommendation…

  45. eg says...

    I am SO glad I’m not the only one obsessed with Timmy and Armie. They are magic, that’s all there is to it.

    • eg says...

      …and yes, I call him Timmy because Luca and Armie do and I consider myself on a first name basis with all of them at this point!

  46. Lenae C says...

    I can totally relate to J. Marie’s thought process in the reader comment above. I have an MA in English and after all of the critiquing and paper writing, I now mostly read what I like to call “books I don’t have to think too much about.” I recently started reading the Outlander series (romance meets historical fiction meets time travel?) and it’s been great mind break.

    • Ammie says...

      I love the Outlander series! Started reading about 2 years ago and was hooked. I love how the author writes and developed the characters by the last book they all felt like family. :)

  47. Commenting on someone’s reading choices needs to be thrown on to the discard pile of potential questions. My 8yo is dyslexic and a very resistant reader because of all the heart ache that has entailed. We went to the library recently and she stunned me by going up to the librarian to request the Dogman series to read by herself. The librarian said to her, “I’m sure mom would like you to pick something more substantial.” I said, “Nope, mom’s thrilled with Dogman.” Smoke was coming out of my ears.

    • C says...

      Wow I can’t believe a librarian said that! So sorry this was your experience. But – must have been thrilling to see her pick something out! Hoping that encounter doesn’t discourage her from future reading.

    • Blythe Dearden says...

      I’m an English teacher who actively promotes and celebrates graphic novels, sometimes to the very shock of parents and colleagues. But, it’s simple. Kids who find stories they love will keep reading. Isn’t that what it’s about?
      Some recent graphic novels my 7th grade kiddos have loved:
      El Deafo by Cece Bell
      Invisible Emmie by Terri Libenson
      Real Friends by Shannon Hale
      Cardboard by Doug TenNapel
      One other note, I’m a 28 year old who still loves picture books. Picture books for life.

    • Claire says...

      Yes to graphic novels and people- especially kids- reading what they enjoy.
      The Bone series, by Jeff Smith, is delightful and we read it over and over when my son was not quite up to reading on his own. It was a great stepping stone, and remained a favorite even after he was proficient. Those books are still family favorites and he is now 16.

    • Steph says...

      Amen, amen, amen to Blythe. Who knows, maybe you are encouraging our next great illustrator!

    • Sarah Beth says...

      That is…wow. I’m a librarian, and that is definitely, definitely not how any librarian I know would react to a kid choosing to read a book, whether it’s a series or something more “substantial” (what does that even mean!.) There are so many good librarians out there who will help lead your budding, though perhaps somewhat reluctant, reader to all kinds of books. Smoke is coming out of my ears on your behalf!

    • Maiz says...

      Smoke is coming out of my ears! Dav Pilkey’s books are WONDERFUL for reluctant readers, and he is a champion of kids with different learning styles. I second Blythe’s comment, and would like to add “Nathan Hale’s Hazardous Tales” to her list.

    • Thanks for all the book recs! I can’t wait to have my daughter check them out!

  48. When I said, on Facebook, how much I like The Husband’s Secret, a friend of mine went on and on about how vapid it was and how she had figured out the ending like RIGHT AWAY and I was so annoyed that she thought I should be reading something “better.” I was entertained! Isn’t that what reading is FOR? I learn better visually (documentaries) and am entertained by books. Why make a Thing about it? Romance novels FTW!

    • T says...

      In my opinion (equal and as worthy as your friend’s) fiction teaches us compassion, and none especially moreso than The Husband’s Secret. In that story I learned that we make mistakes, that life is grey – not black and white, that jumping to conclusions is dangerous, that we compromise on our morality and sometimes there is reason for it. Elistism in art bores me. Like what you like. I don’t believe you can engage in ANY art and not learn something – not that that should even be the only purpose of art. What happened to good old fashioned joy and pleasure for the sake of it?

    • Lars says...

      Don’t judge your friend, either! If someone tells me they loved a book I hated, I actually really enjoy knowing why and not because I think something I didn’t like isn’t worth anyone else’s time or that I’m judging their choices. It sounds like your friend was sharing with you; she didn’t like it for reasons x and y. If it were me, I’d love to hear your reply, that you enjoyed the book because it made you think about compassion or whatever. I mean, life isn’t interesting if we all agree! :)

  49. Liz says...

    Girl getaways are so great. In the glass of water arena, are they old enough to start getting their own water? Maybe a plastic carafe on a low shelf in the refrigerator? And their own plastic mugs also within reach?

  50. Emmie says...

    “Tonight (it never gets dark this time of year) I skied back to the Pole again… to take this photo for all those men who commented “Make me a sandwich” on my TEDX Talk. I made you a sandwich (ham & cheese), now ski 37 days and 600km to the South Pole and you can eat it xx”

    LOVED THIS

  51. Jennie says...

    Jo I am going to do you a huge favor. Keep your fridge stocked with kid cups of milk, water, whatever. They can help themselves ;-) ENJOY your weekend!

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      THANK YOU. :) our fridge and sink are both randomly really high, it’s hard for them to reach the milk and water. so that’s a perfect idea.

    • Emma says...

      Do it Monterssori-style and put out a pitcher of water and glasses (and a towel) where they can reach it and clean up spills themselves :)

    • Anne says...

      Second this!! We have two small pitchers in the fridge door — one for milk and one for water, along with some smaller cups in a cabinet within reach. Whenever my 5yo or 8yo ask for something to drink, I just give them information: “The pitcher’s in the fridge!” Sometimes I do have to add five minutes later, “The towels are in the drawer” :)

    • Amy says...

      We keep three kids cups with sippy lids on them in the fridge with milk for our three kids (6, 4, 2). Yes, the 4 and 6 yo don’t really need a lid anymore, but it means no spilling in the fridge if the cups get knocked over :P The cups go to the table at lunch and dinner and washed at the end of the day, and the kids reach in and take a drink whenever they want (we have the old-school fridge with the freezer on top). They also each have a kids camelbak water bottle in their room.

      Do they actually drink much though? Only the four year old does. Maybe it’s the plenty/scarcity thing and I should take away easy access and then they’ll be parched! Ha :D

    • Taylor says...

      We have a freezer on bottom fridge. Both of my boys (2&4) climb up in the fridge, and grab the milk and pour themselves cups. My parents are always alarmed, seeing them standing on the freezer etc, but I try to nurture that independence.

    • T says...

      Ha! This reminds me. A neighbour had a proper public-park-style drink fountain installed in her back yard for this same reason.

    • Emily says...

      As kids my mom put water bottles with a lid and straw in the bottom shelf on the door of our fridge for my brother and I. This way we could get a drink any time we wanted and my mom didn’t have cups all over the house.