My Chat With an Energy Reader

This week, Cup of Jo editor and metaphysics enthusiast Caroline talked to an energy reader to get clarity on her love life. It was not what she expected. Here’s her story…


Confession: I believe in magic.

If you rifle through my belongings, you’ll find crystals, tarot cards and bundles of sage nestled among the more practical items. I love synchronicity and always try to think positively. So when my friend recommended an energy healer (and raved about her insights), I had to try it out.

Maria practices NET, or Neuro Emotional Technique, a branch of energy healing. Here’s how it works: First, you make a statement that you want to be true (e.g., “I’m okay with public speaking”). Next, Maria pinpoints the exact emotion you feel when you make the statement (e.g., “anxious”) and works to neutralize the feeling. Maria describes her job as finding her client’s “core woundings” and helping them re-adjust their patterns.

I settle into a sunny patch on my couch—hoping the warmth will translate into good energy—and dial Maria’s number. That’s right: she’s going to read my energy from the other side of the continent.

“What’s going on?” she asks. I feel momentarily paralyzed, like when someone says, “Tell me about yourself,” at a job interview. A lot of things are going on. Where do I begin?

To get the ball rolling, I talk about some recent challenges in my love life. There is a long pause. Did I get too personal? Finally, Maria tells me I don’t actually want what I think I want. According to her, something deep down in my core doesn’t want to be in a relationship.

She instructs me to say, “I’m okay getting married.” I do. She laughs an uproarious laugh. “Your nervous system did NOT like that.”

Next, she asks me to visualize my own proposal. “How do you feel?” she asks. I decide to be honest. “Like I’m going to throw up.”

Then things start to get interesting. “Why do you hate men?” she asks. “I don’t hate men,” I protest, because I don’t! (Also because this seems like the correct response.)

“But you do,” she insists. Try saying, “I’m okay with men.” I say it three times. She tells me the emotion that’s coming up is disdain. Eek.

“I guess…” I venture, “In a romantic context, I’ve generally found most men to be…disappointing.”

She instructs me to place my left hand on my right wrist and my right palm on my forehead. “Try to feel as much disdain as you possibly can. Picture the experiences in which you’ve been disappointed. Do that until the feeling subsides.”

I sit there, holding my own head, sifting through memories, trying to conjure up as much contempt as possible. It is surprisingly easy. There was my very first boyfriend, way back in third grade, who dumped me for the new girl in town. “She’s prettier than you,” he offered by way of explanation, thus gifting me with a life-long wariness of shallow guys. There was the date who told me I shouldn’t wear sandals in public because my little toe looked weird. There was the string of legitimate heartbreaks littered throughout my twenties. Maybe she’s right, I think. Maybe I do hate men.

After a few minutes, though, the feeling subsides. “I feel better!” I announce with triumph. Once again, I am instructed to say “I’m okay with men.” This time, I do it with conviction. Maria seems pleased.

“So do you want to do something a little funky?” she asks. Hold up: Am I not already doing something funky? But yes, I am game.

Next, she walks me through a guided meditation in which I ride an elevator back through my life, down to when I am eight years old. Third-grade me exits the elevator onto a playground, where I confront my little-boy nemesis and, after an imagined conversation, walk away with the promise that everything will be okay, that love and commitment are real, and that I am worthy of them.

By now, our time is almost up. She asks me how I feel.

“Better?” I venture. It is more of a question than a statement. I do feel better, but I also feel kind of skeptical…like I’m discussing an imaginary elevator with a stranger who is 2,500 miles away.

She is satisfied with my response for now. “I see that your patterns were in place long before you were born,” she tells me. “These feelings are very deep—they go back over 1,500 years, to a past life. Next time, we can work to unpack some of that.”

Maybe, I think. And maybe not.

In the meantime, though: I’m okay with men.


Have you ever talked to an energy reader? Would you want to? Would love to hear!

P.S. 5 genius dating tips, and how to give the best foot massage.

  1. Well, I have a bit of a funny story… I am Metis, raised by a native mother with a deep affinity for natural, spiritual, and energetic healing practices. So it is a gift that has remained with me; though in my younger years it ‘defined’ me differently enough that I did not see it as a gift at all ;) Now I work as an energy healer, dance therapist, and the odd time on missing persons cases for authorities. My challenge has been to not get frustrated, and remember that not everyone perceives the world this way. Love this post, thank you!~*

  2. I have never been to a psychic or energy healer and really don’t believe in it, except… for some reason, I totally believe in animal psychics! I always want to hire an animal psychic for my cat!

  3. Anonymous says...

    @Lindsay I think honesty with ourselves can be one of the most difficult perspectives to gain so hiring help with that IS super helpful, lol. And therefore very healing when you finally are able to see the truth.

    Personally, I’ve been using flower remedies to help deepen my clarity and sharpen my perspective – to generally open my consciousness I guess, and find they really are helping me to hear my inner truth must more clearly, which is making a big difference in my life.

  4. How interesting! I love this sort of thing! But I must confess – I don’t think I’m buying it this time. It sounds like she was just giving you the permission you needed to acknowledge the feelings you naturally suppress. Of course you felt good about it – honesty feels good! What do you think? This is one of those posts that make me really wish we were sitting together and chatting over coffee!

    -Lindsay from Dearest Darling

  5. I went through a serious depression after a break-up it lasted almost 2 years. I saw a reiki healer and after just one session I walked out smiling. I’m generally a skeptic but I had been feeling so low for so long that I was willing to try anything. It works:)

  6. This comment has been removed by the author.

  7. I loved the post. it give you strength so it is worth going when you need some more spiritual influence which is always good and can do no harm I believe.

  8. Caroline, you are darling. This is totally not my cup of tea, but what an interesting experience! Could be kind of fun to try

  9. Very enjoyable post, thanks to Caroline’s great writing style. Joanna, you picked the right person to work with you on your blog! I love reading everything you both write!

  10. I’m an “energy freak” and I’m ok with that now, despite I’m being called “new age” by my parents, “crazy” by my brother and “hippie” by my friends. Before finding my spiritual path I was really unhappy and now that I’m surrounded by incredible people who helps me to grow up everyday. I’ve never had an energy reading “per se” yet but I’m going to have it one day. I do believe in magic… and those who don’t fill never find it! ;) (I really think every person is unique and what works for one doesn’t have to work for another… but I’ve never had a little faith, I wouldn’t be here.)

  11. This is a wonderful story! I am a huge believer in energies and definitely think it’s possible that healing occurred with you here. Thank you for sharing this story :)

    Circus & Bloom

  12. I don’t believe in these things… But it’s good that you feel better. I am student of psychotherapy myself and I would recommend that you try some of that too! It’s not mysterious at all (a millions studies about so many different areas have been made) but it definitely can make you understand yourself better and feel better, at the long run. Good luck!

  13. I’ve been to an energy reader who READ MY SOUL. It was pretty intense. Started with an alignment of my chakras, then spoke as if it was my own soul speaking.

    She recorded it for me, and when I got home, listened to it and cried, thinking of how that’s how I really had felt, but never had the courage to say out load. She saw I was looking for a partner at the time, and imagined me sitting on a beach with this partner. She taught me some meditations, similar to Caroline’s, and instructed me on outlooks towards men as well.

    Two weeks later I met my current boyfriend. Our third date was a day trip to the beach!

    Scary, but powerful stuff.

  14. This was such an interesting read! I love Caroline haha. Really, really great post and refreshing to see something not often talked about in a believable and relate-able way.

  15. This was such an incredible post! thank you for sharing.

  16. Interesting. I love that you did this Caroline. As a fellow single lady, I also love that you brought a bit of singledom to the site (though I do love your adorable family Jo!).

    I’ve recently been doing a very similar technique with the long distance help of my life coach called age regression therapy wherein I visit with myself at a younger age to try and uncover the source of beliefs and behavior patterns. It’s absolutely nuts, but it’s so weirdly comforting to “spend time with yourself” and begin to understand WHY you are the way you are.

    Hoping your non-hating of men brings you some cute ones…


  17. So fascinating! Love this post.

  18. I am so glad you did this, and so glad you wrote about it!! (on the metaphysical side, I feel like more and more people are in our generation are believing in the unbelievable. And, I’m one of them, love hearing stories like this. Good for you Caroline, keep up the work. And keep sharing it… meaningful and inspiring for all of our separate journeys!

  19. I haven’t had that kind of energy work done, but I did go for craniosacral therapy which is, I guess, a kind of energy healing? I went into it at my friend’s request and was like, yeah yeah, I won’t be disappointed if nothing happens but I guess I’ll just be curious as to what will happen. I can honestly say that I have left sessions like a different person who has never existed in my entire lifetime, one who has never felt the trauma of a horrible past or present. I walked into work one day and my boss said, “Hi! What happened? It’s like light just entered the room!” I would highly recommend it to anyone who wants to do some research into it. The idea is that we hold experiences within our bodies, in our very cells, and we can be helped by basically doing nothing but letting the practitioner do their thing. It runs counter to everything we’ve been taught to do — “Work at it! Fix it! Think about it!” I wish I could go all the time, but I’m a poor student. :P

  20. I’ve been to an energy healer a few times and I always feel SO much better afterward. When he goes into my past lives and tells me the things I’ve gone through, it makes SO much sense when compared to the things and emotions I struggle with right now. Freaky super duper cool.

  21. How interesting! I’ve never heard of an energy reader! But I’ve always had an urge to go to psychic but have never actually felt comfortable doing it. This could be an interesting option!

  22. Hi, I’m from Italy! This is a very interesting post, I really would like to speak with such a beautiful person! Do you think is it possible from Italy?
    I always read Cup of Jo, very nice blog!

  23. Best post by Caroline yet. You are really finding your footing as a blogger Caroline, nice work:)

  24. How interesting! Thanks for sharing, Caroline. I would love to do something like that. I have a feeling I might have a similar reading :)

  25. Thanks for sharing Caroline. This is fascinating and makes me think back to events in my life that have shaped me… Very interesting read.

  26. I am receiving energy massages for my cancer. She said she could do it from a distance, which amazed me! I said I would do better in person, I would be too skeptical if she wan’t there. Anyway, I think it is kind of the same thing . . .

    My first time she said my body was too unraveled and nervous to take in anything. The second time my body was ready and took in a lot of energy. I don’t know if it’s helping the tumor, but I feel more energized and balanced after the sessions!

  27. I would like to do this! It sounds very interesting- almost a mix of therapy & hypnosis & meditation? I once saw a therapist who did hypnosis – it was extremely helpful the first time, but as I went back, I was unable to capture that original experience…I’d love to hear if you try this again!

  28. Awesome! Thanks for sharing! Visiting a medium has always been on my bucket list. I’d never heard of an energy reader until now – fascinating!

    Caroline – Are you going to follow up? Would love to hear more about your experience. And I’m sure you and your feet are wonderful. :)

  29. annie, she doesn’t have a website and is word of mouth, but email us and we’ll pass along her info! hellojoannagoddard @ g m a i l xoxo

  30. Oh my goodness, this is exactly what I need in my life. Where can I get this woman’s contact information?

  31. I would totally try this! My mother would have her cards and tea leaves/coffee grounds read all the time when I was growing up as well as burned sage to do some cleansing in the house on occasion. While I haven’t participated yet, I am totally game to try something she hasn’t. Would you recommend this healer to others, perhaps certain inquiring readers??

  32. Umm, Maria’s contact info? :)

  33. While I was reading this my wedding song stared to play on Pandora…(it felt serendipitous, I wouldn’t have commented otherwise). Keep the faith Caroline the good ones are out there!

  34. How intriguing! I really want to try this.

    And Caroline, my boyfriend in high school insisted I kept my socks on at all (read: ALL) times since my feet were “ugly” (I played basketball.) So I can totally related to the sandal thing.

    Would love to hear if you have another session!

  35. Sounds like a session with a therapist…a good one at that.

  36. Haven’t worked with an energy reader but my sister in law did an over the phone reading as well. She said it was great. I would love to try it.

  37. Oh my god I love Caroline. This is a great post. I love that I can relate to her quirky, and perhaps awkward nature at times. Makes me laugh and feel a little less crazy. Refreshing to read!

  38. I went to an energy reader once, and though I went in very skeptically, it was a great experience! She told me I am overly empathetic and some of the emotional weight I carry is because I’m holding onto it for other people. I sobbed the whole way home after the reading just trying to release it and care more about only what affected me.

    She also told me I had been an Irish potato farmer’s wife in a past life too, though, so…

  39. I love Caroline’s writing style, it’s filled with so much personality. Thank you for sharing your experiences with us!

  40. Wow, that was FASCINATING! Are you going to do it again? I would LOVE to hear more. You know, not to pry or anything, but this definitely intrigues me!

  41. My goodness Caroline! That sounded intense! Where is this Maria? Are you calling her back? Can I call her too? haah
    I believe in misterious things too but Its so frustating to think things are even less in our control as we pretentiously like to think they are. I mean, one thing is to see a therapist and discuss whats going on in our lives and how our past experiences are affecting our behavior today. Its a whole new thing to consider that our troubles today are consequences for something that happenned thousands of years ago. I mean, talk about unfair, right!?
    Anyway, Im curious to know whats next!

  42. I love this post. What an interesting discovery then exercise to get where you want to be. Thanks for sharing your experience!

  43. I really enjoyed this post by Caroline!

  44. what beautiful pictures !!!
    I wish you a great week !!! love all of angie from Germany