Motherhood

Conversations With Toby and Anton

Conversation with a Two-Year-Old

Conversation with a Two-Year-Old

Have your little ones been saying any funny things recently? Anton is 2, and Toby is almost 6, and they’ve become a hilarious little duo. They’re also fascinated by the idea of being grownups. Here are a few things they’ve been saying recently…

Toby: “Daddy, what music is playing?”
Alex: “The Doors.”
Toby. “I don’t like The Doors… But I do like doors.”

Toby: “You’re not the boss.”
Me: “I actually am the boss.”
Toby: “Not of daddy.”
Me: “Yes, I’m the boss of daddy, too. OF EVERYONE.”

Me: “What do you want to be when you grow up?”
Anton: “A firefighter robot.”
Me: “Will you live in Brooklyn?”
Anton: “Yes, and have a stoop.”
Me: “What will you do on the stoop?”
Anton: “Eat ice cream and say hi to the FedEx guy.”

Alex: “Did you know that when I was a kid, we didn’t have iPhones?”
Toby: “So, when you were little, there were no cars and just horses?!””

Anton: “We got cookies today from the neighbor. He said his mother made the cookies.”
Me: “What’s a mother?”
Anton: “You know, kind of like a lady who works on a computer and has tools.”

Anton: “Can I please have a quesadilla?”
Me: “With chicken?”
Anton: “No, just cheese and tor-teera.”

We recently went out for ice cream by our apartment.
Me: “You know what I would love for my next birthday? This brownie right here.”
Toby: “For your next birthday, do you know what I will give you? A robot!”
Anton: “I will give you a remote control car. I will have the first turn with the remote control car.”
Me: “Those presents sound so nice! They sound like things you would both like! Now think about me: What would I like? Think about things I really like.”
Anton: “Knives?”
Toby: “… Us?”

What about your little ones? What have they been into recently?

P.S. Talking to kids about sex, death and everything else.

(Photos of Anton at Easter by our friend Rob Meyer.)

  1. Breaks my heart!

  2. Sophia says...

    “…us?” Melts my heart

  3. Lea says...

    When my daughter was around 20 months, she would say “What you say mama?” whenever she didn’t understand something. Just like Arnold from Different Strokes. To this day this memory cracks us up!

  4. What a great description of a mother!!! Someone who works on computers and has tools :))) Love it

  5. Bahaha what they want to give you for your birthday :)

  6. katrina says...

    My dad, to my 3 year old : ” Look, a bird on your back porch! Do you think it’s a boy or a girl?”
    3 year old ” it’s a bit. ”
    My dad, ” Oh, you can tell because of its feathers.”
    3 year old, patiently, ” No, Grandpa. Girls have bows, you know, on their heads? ”

    :) overhead that gem today.

  7. Carolyn says...

    Me: What would you like for dinner?
    Son: A bowlie!
    Me: A bowlie of what honey?
    Son: A bowlie of crackers and dinosaurs!
    Son is 2 :)

  8. Emmanuella says...

    hahahaha… so many good ones but thank you for ending on the best. i nearly choked on my chai latte reading “knives”

  9. Elli says...

    these are my favorite posts! hahaha too good

  10. Angel says...

    LOL on “knives…us”! My daughter, 8, just learned about government in school and so I, who works in state government, discussed all the presidential candidates with her back when there were still 10 or so. I then told her we keep this information private and it’s rude to blurt out who’s a loser (one guess) and so on in public.

  11. Katherine says...

    This is hilarious, I love it.

  12. When asked what to buy his aunt for her birthday my four year old son responded with, “I want to get her something every woman needs…. Something like a branch for cleaning the air!”

    His two year old brother piped in, “I want to get her a bulldozer!”

    Another time they were playing with a calculator and the younger one said “I’m changing the iTunes to Dr. Palmer’s because I’m Dr. Palmer [a totally made up character].”
    Big brother: Change it to Dr. Manners’ because I’m Dr. Manners.
    Little brother: Well, I’m going to change it to Dr. Dinosaur’s because I’m Dr. Dinosaur!
    Big brother: Okay…. Would you like me to comb your hair? ‘Cause I’m the kind of doctor that does peoples’ hair and today I don’t have any business!

    Listening to their imaginary play cracks me up!

    • Geraldine says...

      That’s very funny

  13. Coco says...

    Me to my 2 year old as I put him to bed:
    Would you, do me a favour and sleep the whole night, no waking?

    Him: Okay. You do me a chocolate flavour.

    • hahaha love it

  14. It’s so precious that Toby said ‘Us’ as something you really like. So wonderful for them to know that they know you really LIKE them!!

  15. This is so funny, I keep reading it over and over again, it makes me LOL every single time! I just love kids! Please post more of this!!!

    • Yes, more of this please!!

  16. Stephanie says...

    This is so stinkin’ funny!

  17. lidia says...

    laughed so hard at the last two lines. knifes? us? hahaha. my son said he would get me toys and when I asked him to think about what i liked he said… toys!

  18. ahahahaha … morte de rire ! les conversations avec des enfants sont vraiment les meilleures!

  19. Maileen says...

    The iPhone comment is a winner!

  20. Ellen says...

    I was walking to the supermarket, with my two year old right in front of me on his push-bike. He turned his head around and said: “if you’d like to take a rest, I don’t mind”

    My 2 year old needs to wash his hands and wants me to help him. I tell him he can do it by himself. He: “No, unfortunately I can’t do it by myself”

    Monday night, I’ve picked up my 2 year old from daycare. He (with a tone that says “almost forgot!”): “Mommy, was it good at your work?”

  21. Alex says...

    When my husband goes to the grocery store with our son He lets him choose flowers for me. Now whenever my son sees a man buying flowers he says, “look he’s buying his mom flowers!”

    • this is so precious, Alex. I love that they get you flowers, and your husband is teaching him how to honour his mom :)

  22. My little guy is 16 months so not talking properly yet. But it’s amazing to see the associations – he is obsessed with our cat and so anything small and fluffy is called “tat” (cat). His stuffed lemur, his teddy bear, small dogs, birds, and even his doodoo blankie. It’s too sweet.

  23. Tamsin says...

    Way too cute, love that they both missed the big clue of you saying you wanted the brownie! So funny how hard a time kids have trying to think what adults would like! Since only kid-related stuff is remotely interesting, makes sense the only thing you must like is your kids!!

  24. A says...

    My niece who when asked what the magic word was when she demanded a drink from her mother (she was looking for ‘please’ btw) was answered with Abracadabra!!!
    Funny!

  25. A says...

    My friends kid when he noticed veins on his body for the first time shreiked Mommy Mommy I’m cracking up!

  26. Emily says...

    When we run out of something my 2-yo daughter is requesting (usually crackers or fruit) I tell her that we’ll have to get more at the store. Recently we were talking about teeth and she noticed that her new baby brother doesn’t have any and she said, “Baby Calvin, no have teeth! We get some at the store?” Ha!

  27. Pim says...

    Toby: “… Us?”

    that’s the cutest thing ever!

  28. Aya says...

    I loved these! I think I loved what you said to the boys almost as much as I loved what they said! After a hard day, this was just what I needed. Thank you.

  29. Laurel says...

    At dinner the other night, my husband was telling our 3yo the saying “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” Lukas responded immediately, “make some lemonade, give it to me.”

  30. Eileen says...

    When my son was about 3, he would get canker sores all the time and call them dinosaur bites. The term confused me so I asked him why he called them dinosaur bites. He answered, “It’s a dinosaur bite. It’s a canker-saurus!”

    • brilliant!

  31. Fiona says...

    My toddler son (age 2 and a smidge) came in to investigate while I was having a bath…

    Calloway: What’s that? What’s that?
    Me: This? This is my breast. And this here is my nipple.
    C: Oh.
    Me: When you were a little baby you had milk from here, do you remember?
    C(lying): Yes.
    Me: I wonder if… Yes, look Calloway, if I squeeze carefully I can get a little milk to come, do you see it?
    C: Yes.
    Me: This is how I made the milk.
    C: Can you make the cereal now?

  32. Kelsi says...

    Our son is a little over a year and a half…it’s starting to get real. :)
    He always ends up in our bed in the middle of the night because I am simply over trying to put him back to bed over and over again, so we all crash out together….then in the morning, he wakes up and says in the sweetest voice as he reaches out to both of us: “Mama…dada…two. FWENDS.” Heart, melt.

  33. Ahahahhahah! This is the first time all week I’ve spontaneously laughed! Brilliant conversations. I wonder if you will get the brownie, the robot, or the car?

  34. Brilliant, and sweet and funny. Makes wonder when I am going to have childrens.

  35. Sara Walters says...

    I love when you have these posts about your boys and what they say. I have a 3-year-old, and I hear similar things. But the last one on here…oh, my! I know people say it a lot, but I LITERALLY laughed out loud when I read it. Thank you for sharing such sweet, everyday stories from your life. That is the number one reason I have loved following your blog for many years.

  36. Andrea says...

    Daughter: “What are we having for supper?”
    Me: “Ground chicken”
    Daughter: “I thought all chickens lived on the ground.”

  37. Jen says...

    your kids are so sweet and precocious! i love hearing what they say!

    i was lying in bed with 3.5 year old, talking about foreheads. “so my forehead is the shin of my head?”

    • Geraldine says...

      Ha ha :)

  38. Cherry says...

    When my 2 year old son sings “I’ve been working on the railroad ….” this is how it goes:

    …..strumming on the old badger……

    • Brilliant hahahaha!!

  39. Emma says...

    I’m a preschool teacher. A couple of weeks ago I had this conversation with one of my students (age 2):
    Student: What’s yous husband’s name?
    Me: His name is Josh.
    Student: I have a husband. Her name is mommy.
    : )

    • Laurel says...

      That is hilarious and more true than any of us would dare admit!

  40. Rbe says...

    My 5 yr old & I have the most amusing conversations. After dinner we walked to a bakery & he spotted a cookie topped with m&m’s. I told him he could only have half tonite. “I’ll take the top half ” – Lol, so clever!!!

  41. Lucy says...

    I love these posts Joanna, even more so because of the comments that are just as funny! I am trying to stifle my laughter at work and I am not doing a very good job hahaha.

  42. Sarah says...

    There are many reasons why I love reading A Cup of Jo, but conversations with Toby and/or Anton are definitely my number one reason.

  43. Cynthia says...

    I’m sorry, I posted a comment on the wrong post. Wasn’t paying attention.

  44. Cynthia says...

    Love the polar bear. He/she looks like the one on the Kate Spade winter scarf. Maddie the coonhound is cute too.

  45. Susie Goolsby says...

    My daughter(now 16), overheard me announcing to others that she was 20 months old over and over again when she was almost 2 years old. So, when people would ask, she started answering before I could and saying ,”I’m Monty old!” So funny.

  46. Cindy says...

    My four year old grandson was watching the Piano Guys YouTube video of Let it Go/ Vivaldi’s Winter. When they played Let it Go, he said “Oh, the instruments are singing the words”. When they played Vivaldi, which was not familiar to him, he said “I don’t know what they are saying now”.

    • Katie says...

      That’s such a beautiful way to think about music!

  47. Jenna says...

    My 17 month is only just starting to string words together, so I haven’t had that many funny sentences yet. I did walk past a little boy (4 or so) the other day who was inside his fenced playschool. He said hello to me, so I said hello back. Then he ran over to his friends, yelling “I talked to a STRANGER!”. Hahaha.

  48. Liz says...

    My 2 and a half year old loves watching and pointing out the airplanes in the sky. She now proclaims, “Momma, airplane’s going home to mommy and daddy!” I never new airplanes had mommy’s and daddy’s. :-)

  49. Jules says...

    the boys are adorable! So sweet! And I couldn’t but help notice the couch in the back. Can you please tell me who makes it? Thank you!

  50. Every time I ask Luna what’s mommy ‘s favorite food? she says Salad & vegetables! I’m so glad I’m fooling her ;) haha!

    When my husband & I are having a good conversation…. “Don’t talk to each other!” Haha!

    Xo Lendy
    http://www.twoplusluna.com

  51. Wendy Plump says...

    My favorite is Anton’s declaration that he will have the first turn with the remote control car. Love it!

  52. Jacque says...

    Our 2 year old daughter is currently the youngest of 10 cousins, so we have seen and heard quite a bit with them and are excited to watch her enter this new season full of words!

    When we had announced our pregnancy to the extended family, my 3 year old niece was sleeping. When we saw her the next day, she wanted “see the baby in my belly.” As she sat there straddling my lap on the couch, I said okay and let her take a look. She pulled up my shirt, examined my 13 week belly with wide eyes and then loudly asked in front of everyone “Did Uncle put it there?” Total dear in the headlights moment!

  53. Thanks for the laughs Joanna! So sweet.

  54. Chrissy Shea says...

    Our neighbors’ children LOVE my husband, Patrick. The 3 year old went from thinking his name was “Pad Thai” to “Pad-Truck”. Kids crack me up!

  55. Erin says...

    Knives, hah that made me laugh.

  56. Elizabeth R says...

    I don’t have kids myself but I am an Aunt to two adorable twin six month old baby boys. I can’t wait to hear the funny and cute things they will say when they start talking!

  57. my 3-year-old likes changing the days around. he loves fridays, and will sometimes vehemently proclaim that it’s friday when it isn’t. he even said it to his teacher at preschool “TODAY IS FRIDAY. I CHANGED IT TO FRIDAY! NO MORE TUESDAY!”

    yesterday he wouldn’t let up that it was Monday, May 2 and was so upset that my “phone was wrong” because it said Sunday, May 1.

  58. Jessica says...

    Timely. I was laughing this morning at my almost 3-year-old’s assertion that beavers “punch down trees”

    A few from the archives:
    Me: Is that [toy] an armadillo?
    Kid: It does have arms, but it’s not a dillo.

    Kid: Do you still have a cold?
    Dada: No, it’s all gone.
    Kid [with relief]: But your nose is still there.

    Me: If you see a fruit fly, squash it. I’m trying to get rid of them.
    Kid, several long moments later: If I don’t see a fruit fly, do I not squash it?

  59. anne says...

    fantastic!!!!

  60. Theresa says...

    I have a 3 year old son. Not too long ago my sister’s pet turtle died. He ask her where the turtle was and she told him he was with Jesus in Heaven. Henry said, “oh” and went on playing with his toys. The next day at dinner he looked at my husband and “Did you know someone named Jesus stole Aunt Heather’s turtle?!” Hahahaha

    • Roxana says...

      Haha! That’s hilarious!

  61. kiki says...

    Hubby (to my son, 2.5): “look! you have one foot, and another one foot! How many feet does that make?”

    Son: “It makes sense!”

    hahahah, we were dying laughing. It does make sense!

    • Geraldine says...

      Fantastic!

  62. Karen in VA says...

    … Hands down, no question … This blog subject is my favorite of all the topics you post.

    Kids are hilarious at this age.

    Karen in VA

    • Lucy says...

      Agreed!!

  63. Mel Keaney says...

    My 6-year old and I were recently at ice cream and she pointed to a woman there with her child and said “mommy, that lady is so short, her kid is almost taller than her and he is only a kid.” I shushed her and she responded “It’s ok, mommy, small people can do big things! Like taking care of a baby.” Melt my heart!

  64. Knives! That was so hilarious.

    I hope I am able to start and sustain an incredibly interesting conversation with my kids when I have them.

    Your kids are just very interesting

  65. So cute :) I can relate to the one about you being the boss. My boys have told me many times that their dad is the “boss of the house” and the boss of me, too. Ugh! I had to quickly correct them, but I was surprised how long it took them to stop referring to their dad in this way!

  66. So funny! I love your comment that you are the boss of daddy too. ;) My daughter (2.5 years) has been talking about wanting to have a “peanut” and pee like daddy. :) She also says, “Good mama.” and gives me back pats (which is hilarious because we’re not into the “good girl” thing.

    I always enjoy coming to your blog for a good read. Thank you! Just this morning I shared my thoughts on life and entering into a new decade this birthday. Whew! Happy Monday to you!

    http://www.thewefiles.com

    • Libbynan says...

      It took two years to convince my daughter that she couldn’t pee standing up like her brother. We would get her all trained to the potty and then catch her standing up at the toilet trying to pee in. Not the most fun time of our lives, but funny.

  67. Sandra says...

    My son recently told me he “cleans up” his gas if he accidentally passes gas at preschool. I asked him what he meant and he told me one time he accidentally “gassed” on the circle they sit on during circle time. So we went and got a paper towel an covered it up. His teacher must be wondering why she keeps finding random paper towels all over the classroom!

  68. Jane says...

    My two and a half year old son brought his big brontosaurus toy named Stefan (why? I don’t know) into Trader Joes yesterday, and was surprisingly well behaved, so I gave him a joe-Joe cookie when we got back to the car and thanked him for being so good. He said, “I know mama, I didn’t Dino smash ANYBODY.” The earnestness was so sweet.

    • Lindsey says...

      Similarly, when I pick up my 3-year-old, she often greets me with, “Hi, Mama! I didn’t hit ANY friends today!!” We have high standards :)

  69. Casey says...

    The last conversation really made me laugh. I also LOVE your couch!

    • Meredith says...

      Me too… Can we get a better look at that couch? :)

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      thanks for your sweet notes! It’s actually my friends’ couch. (we were at their house for easter brunch.) i’ll ask them where they got it! :)

  70. Kelly says...

    Joanna,
    You are doing such a good job letting them express themselves. I’m envious you’ve written down what the boys have said. I started a book once and quickly forgot about it. One of the sweetest things my now 11 year old said when he was about 7 was that he was going to buy Margie’s house next door when he gets older. You have know idea how much that made my heart sing. He’s a confident kid and isn’t clingy. I thought it was so nice that at 7 he was thinking of his big brother and parents. He he had it all figured out. You know when they are little and scrumptious and you need a break. I don’t want any more breaks – I just want to be with them all of the time, so next door would be great.
    Love your blog. I can always rely on a nice variety of subjects.

  71. Roxana says...

    Your boys are absolutely adorable. “Us?” Makes my heart swell. They know how much you love them :).

    And the boss conversation. Haha! Classic.

    My 4.5 year old son (5 in July. . . sniff, sniff) and 2 .5 year old daughter are right there with your dynamic duo. They are delicious. The stuff they say and do is beyond even trying to describe. It’s my favorite time right now. I am tired to the point of delirium, but I wouldn’t trade this time for anything in the world. It is so fun and so sweet and so precious.

    Thanks for sharing!

  72. Nan says...

    Anton has excellent speech skills for a 2-year-old! They are so cute and you’re awesome (“Yes, I am the boss of Daddy too”).

  73. Jane says...

    I’m reading a story to 4-year-old R and his friend N., who’s 5. They’re fooling around and laughing at things not related to the story.
    Me: “Ok, how about you guys spend some time running around and then let me know when you’re ready for the story.”
    R: “No, mama, we will have a conversation and you can read in the meantime.” I don’t even know where he’s learned such adult expressions!

  74. RT says...

    “Knives” hahahaha I am dying

  75. Emily says...

    Haha knives!!! Too cute

  76. Inbal says...

    God bless your sweet and funny children.

  77. Tiffany says...

    Is Anton into older women? I think he is such a sweet lil’ stinker, cute cute post.

  78. nicole says...

    Ha! DEAD.

  79. Catherine says...

    My one and a half year old witnessed a sea lion coughing at the Prospect Park Zoo a few weeks ago. It made a big impression. He will randomly tell us out of no where “Lion, cough cough, lion.” It cracks us up.

  80. Megan says...

    “Knives.”
    “…Us?”

    Made me laugh out loud. I so love these little conversations. Our almost-3-year-old really doesn’t like ants (?). If you ask him what he wants for his upcoming birthday, he will say, “A aardbark (aardvark). To eat those ants AWAY.” Makes me laugh every time.

  81. Alice Quin says...

    This post warmed my cold heart. Loved it!

  82. Kristen says...

    Haha! One of the advantages of being able to blog those sweet moments is having them recorded. I currently have a goal to journal the everyday gems so I can do a better job with memories. Sometimes with the craze of each day I forget those moments. They’re the best!

  83. Knives???!!! That is so random and really funny.

  84. Kara says...

    It’s super badass that your littles think you’d like knives and babies. (I like knives and babies too 🤘🏼)

  85. Lais Cobra says...

    hahahaha can I rent your kids for a few days? ;)
    They are awesome! :D

  86. Angela says...

    We were recently in Target, passing by the lingerie/pajama section, and my 2-year old loudly proclaimed, “Those for boobies, Mama!” Along the same line as boobies, he thinks his soon-to-be-born sister is growing in my boobs. I try to remind him that she is growing in my belly and will eat from my boobs when she comes out, but he is adamant that she is in my boobs right now! Lol

  87. Emily says...

    at my aunts house having lunch with her and my husband, chit chatting about whatever, my 3.5 year old suddenly interjects: “what are you guys talking about? SINGLE MEN?!?!”
    we all of us did a double take and then started laughing to the point of crying. To this day, I have NO idea where she even heard the term single men as we don’t even have a TV she might have picked it up from.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      oh my goodness, hahahaha, i would have been crying with laughter. that is too cute.

  88. Jennifer says...

    Our 2 yr old is obsessed with being a big, strong grown up.
    “I have to do my exercises for my muscles.”
    Then he clears his toys from the rug and proceeds to do perfect burpees while counting! :)

  89. Aw! These kill me! So good. Lars uses the word “actually” in about every sentence these days. He also confuses olives and avocados and because of that calls his cousin Olive “Avocado”.

    Also, I wanted to say thanks so much for including our new birthday cards in your link list on Friday, Joanna! xo

    • Katie says...

      hahahaha! I love that his vegetable confusion extends to his cousin!!

  90. Linda says...

    Those are so cute! I especially love the one about the stoop!!! :)

  91. Sounds like you’re going to have a mixed-bag for birthday gifts this year!

  92. Kendra says...

    “…us?”

    haha!

  93. EPH says...

    As my husband was putting our two daughters to bed our oldest asked him “dad do you want to hear about my day?” And then she proceeded to tell him all the very cute mundane details. And then he asked our little one “do you want to tell me about your day?” And she said “yes…Dad, does your vagina look like a hotdog?”

    We are still laughing.

    • Karen in VA says...

      Hilarious

    • Lucy says...

      Oh my gosh hahaha, I am trying very hard to stifle my laughter at work.

    • Alex says...

      i just spit out my drink – that is COMEDY!

  94. justine says...

    Horses {insert laughing crying emoji here}

  95. Phoebe says...

    My three year old daughter looked through the mail slot to the street outside, sighed, and said, “What a wonderful world!” A few days later she asked me, while reading Elmer’s Friends, if I had ever seen a giraffe with a short neck. I love how seriously children take themselves, because they really aren’t trying to be funny or entertain when they share these questions and observations. Thanks for asking!

  96. Too cute! I am both dreading and looking forward to when my little one talks.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      it’s amazing. my favorite part of parenting so far.

  97. jenna says...

    i love the convo about what you wanted for your birthday! such an easy way to help them learn to think about the interests of others!

  98. Katherine A-E says...

    This is so sweet! I hadn’t seen the post about how to talk about sex with kids and I love you book suggestions. I work on advocacy for sexuality education in and out of schools so it’s a great starting point/resource for us. Thanks :)

    • Aidel.K says...

      Maybe refer to EPH’s comment……….

  99. these are my favorite posts! my little guys is almost two, and it’s so funny to hear what words he picks up. he recently took on my bras out, called it “turtles” then put it on and ran around saying “mommy” in a high pitched voice. (it should be noted: i actually have a pretty low voice)

  100. Tricia says...

    My son, who is a few months over 2 and very talkative, has started noticing how words are used in different contexts. Or at least he is showing his confusion of it! We were waiting for his dad to “catch-up” to us on the street. My son said, “Catch-up, papa!” Then his face changed and he said, “But I don’t like ketchup.” Similarly, he didn’t like the firecrackers at a Chinese New Year celebration we went to, and when thinking of it later, he says “I don’t like firecrackers. I like crackers.”

  101. I started doing this around the same time I saw it pop up here on your blog. Kids really do say the funniest stuff. I keep track of what my kids say with a running note in my iPhone. I blog them randomly here (deleting the blogged convos from the notes app to make room for new ones/avoid duplication): http://www.kelseyespecially.com/tag/conversations/

  102. laetitia says...

    My 4 year old is in the middle of Oedipus complex, the other day he said: “Mommy, can I hold you hand?” I said sure and he proceeded to hold my hand in a pretty formal way (a little higher than usual), then he said: “Ok, now we’re married! Soon, the babies will come!”

  103. Stacie says...

    Thank you for this post! These make me so happy. Especially since I used to work with small children and miss all of the wonderful things they used to say. I just found out I am pregnant a couple of weeks ago, so this makes my heart so happy and excited in a new way! (:

    Also, love “knives.”

  104. Laura C says...

    Last one about bday presents has totally made my day. I can’t believe Anton talks so well!
    My 5YO asks me every day “When was I a baby?” And where were my little sister?” And EEEVERY DAY she asks me if I like every dog she sees on the street. Actually I’m a cat person but I don’t have the heart to tell her that dogs are not my cup of tea :D

    Off topic: Joanna, are you potty-training Anton?

  105. Bailey says...

    So cute! I love Anton’s definition of a mother. :D

  106. Theresa says...

    Our apartment is near the flight path of a busy airport and our daughter, who will be two in a couple weeks, likes to point out the airplanes, point and say “airplane!”. I started asking “where are they going?” and she said, enthusiastically “the TAQUERIA!” …and giggles. We now make a game of it, since we see a lot of planes. After our usual back and forth, I then say, “Oh, the taqueria in London? or Mexico City? or Australia?” She loves it when we mention other countries and says “YES!”…we live in the Bay Area..she loves Taqueria’s!

  107. Jessi Lee says...

    Thanks for sharing! They are adorable!!!

  108. My three year old came running up to me with a bra yesterday. “Put this on”, she ordered. “To keep the milkies warm. And safe from animals”. I hadn’t realized they were in danger (!)

  109. A friend brought home baby #2, and child #1 took a look and immediately lost interest. A while later, noting the visitor was still there, he asked, “When is she going back to her house?”

  110. I love that Anton sees a mother as someone who works on the computer and has tools! Haha!

  111. Susan says...

    Last night we were reading the book, My Bike by Byron Barton to our 2 year old son. The book labels the parts of the bike. After I said, fender my son said, like lightning boom boom (fist raised). Took just a second to realize he thought it was the same as thunder. :)

  112. After hours of pretty miserable riding in the freezing rain of the 5 boro bike tour yesterday, this little kid in the back of his father’s tandem bike said (with so much rage in his little voice):
    “dad….you know we’re only here because of you and your terrible decisions!”
    It made everyone around them laugh and then gave us the energy to finish the ride (because we all made that terrible decision)!

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      hahahaha that is so, so funny.

      PS amazing that they did the five-boro bike tour on a tandem with a kid!!

  113. Robin says...

    I love the random comments out of the blue. The other day while we were having breakfast my two and a half year old said “I like to say Hi to eagles, Mummy.” “One more thing to say – the baby eagles are in the eggs.” So cute, I love it. Where does this stuff come from?

  114. Ashley says...

    Anton looks SO grown up in that button down–I can’t believe he’s only two!

  115. Erica says...

    My sister is pregnant with twins (first pregnancy). It was a big surprise, needless to say. Talking on the phone with her “Auntie Momo” my daughter said: “well, at least you aren’t having THREE babies. That would be a lot.” Yup.

  116. So sweet! I love how their minds work. Brilliant!

  117. Sara K says...

    I was reading your blog the other day and my newly-reading six-year-old plopped down beside me. I was reading beauty tips and thought nothing of it until she slowly intoned, “Did you have sex on your wedding night?” We haven’t had that talk yet, and I was sputtering a bit, but she went on to work out her own take: “I guess that means ‘sex-ess,’ like if you succeed, and you succeeded in getting married.” She worked out that theme of wedding night success out in great detail, and it was all I could do to hold in the guffaws!

    • This is hilarious, Sara!

      Jo, I love that you asked Anton what a mother is. Some of my favorite conversations when I was a nanny (in college, for a three year old boy) were born of asking him to unpack statements he so casually made.

  118. Anita says...

    The ‘Conversations with Toby and Anton’ series is undoubtedly my favorite of this entire blog. What cuties :)

  119. Simone says...

    Love those! A friend’s little one (who I see about once a week) suddenly realized my 6 month pregnant belly was a thing and asked me, “what you got in your belly?” When I told her a baby, she said “what do you want ANOTHER for!?”

    She’s 4 and has a new baby sister, and with my 16 month old and her 2 yo little brother running around, she was just overwhelmed at the thought of any more babies!

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      omg, so so sweet!

  120. erin says...

    My favorite from my daughter recently–weeknight, I’m frantically trying to get dinner on the table after work, and my nearly 3 year old is getting exasperated with my lack of attention. We’d bought a new kite a few weeks ago and haven’t had a nice day to go out and use it:

    Maggie: Mom, the clock says it’s time to go fly the kite!

  121. Oh, I can’t wait to ask my kids what a mother is!

    I love reading the things kids say. I keep a running list on my phone because it’s so sad how quickly you forget the funny things that come out of their mouths! My son said something hilarious yesterday and now I can’t remember what it was and it’s making me so sad :(

    • Oh! This happens to me all the time. They something so sweet and it’s forgotten with the all the hustle and bustle of the day. I share your sadness.

  122. Natalie T. says...

    This one got me. Alex must be feeling ancient! I love, love, love this series. Anton is just as cheeky and adorable as Toby.

    Alex: “Did you know that when I was a kid, we didn’t have iPhones?”
    Toby: “So, when you were little, there were no cars and just horses?!””

  123. nicole b. says...

    Yes, I’m the boss of daddy, too. HA. LOVE.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      I AM THE BOSS OF ALL OF THEM.

    • Amy says...

      Jo, you’re the greatest.

    • Laura says...

      Exactly what I was going to say! Love it.

  124. Meredith says...

    All the comments are hilarious, but I especially love the conversation about what you want for your birthday :D .

  125. Zywie says...

    Knives – aww!

    My new 5-yo is all about defying authority.
    In the car:
    Him: I’m not going to talk to you since you didn’t let me do that
    Me: ok
    (After 10 seconds)
    Him: are you ready to give me a hug? I’m kind of ready!

    Watching me get dressed:
    Mama! I don’t like your earrings. I’m allergic to long earrings. (Fake cough). See, they make me cough!

    Him: where are you going?
    Me: I’m going for dinner with some other mamas
    Him: are only girls allowed there? Is that why me & dad have to stay home?

    Him: I don’t want to go to bed. I will be alone in the house
    Me: I’m right here. How can you be alone?
    Him: oh yeah! My brain forgot to think!

  126. Molly says...

    I love this stage for the funny things they say…my favorite recently was a little more pensive than funny though. My daughter who is 3 said, “Mom, we like each others because we like ourselves, right?” Profound tot!

    A more humorous contribution was when I was trying on new shoes and she said: “Your shoes look great on your legs.” Or playing with sticks at the park: “I don’t have to be a princess every day. I can dig in the dirt.”

    Love the Little Hoots app to capture all these treasures. :)

  127. Cat says...

    I’m cracking up over the birthday present conversation! I love getting a peek into how they understand the world, like in Anton’s comment about what a mother is. In my house, I got a new insight into my 5 year old’s understanding of a bra while I was doing laundry this morning:
    James: Mommy, you dropped your nipple covers.
    Me: My nipple covers?
    James [cups his chest with both hands like he’s making boobs]: Yea, you know, the things you use to cover up your nipples!

    • Sam says...

      Too funny! My 3 year old asked me “is this your nipple glove mummy?” as he held my bra up.

  128. India says...

    Hahaha knives😂 Is there something you’re not telling us?? Do you secretly have a side job as a knife juggler?

  129. Jessi C. says...

    hahaha “….Us?” Love hearing about your children.

  130. Libbynan says...

    My daughter has a grandson, Philip, who just turned five and a granddaughter, Stella, who is 18 months. Philip, playing hopscotch with his aunt, K.T., ” Just bring it, girl!” I nearly hurt myself laughing. I’m not sure what was funnier…….him saying that or K.T.’s face when he did.

  131. Celeste says...

    “Knives?” is better than any answer I could have imagined.

  132. KNIVES. Classic.

    I think you also get points for “yes, I’m the boss of daddy, too”

  133. Lisa says...

    This is so adorable Joanna. I have a 9 week old and a 2 year old (two boys too) and everyday I say to myself – find time to write down these little things because they will mean so much when I read them back in years to come. You’ve inspired me to stop procrastinating – I start today!

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      my friend set up an email account just for the cute things that her kids say — she’ll email it and then she has them all in one spot! :)

  134. Mary Jenkins says...

    Knives! Your two boys are too cute.

  135. Amy says...

    That’s the best!
    My 4 year old was watching me put on make up, so she grabbed the blush brush and said “Hey mom, can I put some blush on your great big cheeks??”
    She also asked if she could be Harry Styles (from One Direction) for Halloween and declared she would need “Harry shoes” if this were to actually take place.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      On your great big cheeks! Haha, I love it.

    • Sadie says...

      Hahahaha! My three-year-old was sitting next to me the other day, reached over, patted my belly, and said absentmindedly, “You’re just a big ol’ mama. Biiiiig ooooool’ mamaaaaaaa.” The way he said it, it sounded like the best thing in the world.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      oh my goodness, did you just DIE? i love that.

    • Rebekah says...

      Oh gosh, I was cuddled up with my husband on the couch…our three year old whipped the afghan off my legs and proclaimed, “Look! It’s a big fat mommy!” Couldn’t stop laughing.

      She also told her baby sister “Zoe, you’re ugly!” because she thinks it’s a compliment.

  136. Kelly says...

    Knives!!! Hilarious

  137. How adorable!
    What would I like? Think about things that I like.”
    Anton: “Knives?”
    Toby: “… Us?”
    That is wonderful!

    My almost 3YO, when asked what flavor of fruit puree he wants said “sun ray puree”. Made my day.

  138. I’m crying over the knives! My almost five year old told me my favorite hobby was folding laundry a few weeks ago.

    • Joanna Goddard says...

      hahahaha

    • Meghann says...

      Me: Dad is really good at fixing things, we’ll have him take a look.
      5yo: You’re really good at washing dishes!